A/N: So this is now my second foray into Perception. I literally itched all day at work once I got this idea in my head, though I have no idea if it will be a standalone or a multi chapter, so we'll see. For anyone who's questioning the Castle reference, it's the Jack Shot Jill Over Bill line, from season one, pilot episode if I'm right. I know nothing about legal terms or hospital information; just go with me on this. Also, I am taking liberty with drugs here, as I know nothing about them either, I'm totally making one up, so don't expect facts. (side note: the stuff about power of attorney is legit) Lyrics are "Happiness" by The Fray.
Evolution
Happiness damn near destroys you
Breaks your faith to pieces on the floor
So you tell yourself, that's enough for now
Happiness has a violent roar
Daniel Pierce woke up that morning with a strange sense of peace, and even larger sense of foreboding. It was the kind of instinct he hadn't remembered having since the day the doctor told him he was a schizophrenic, and his world spiraled recklessly out of control. Today was going to be one of those days, and he couldn't help the chill he felt at that thought.
He tried to shove the unease into the back of his troubled mind, went about his morning routine, ate his grapefruit with lime and did his crossword puzzle, listened to Mozart as he walked to class to calm himself down.
The lecture went as planned, no blips in his radar, no hallucinations popping by to say hello at inopportune times. The only interruption in his day was Kate sliding into a desk at the top of his classroom halfway through his twelve o'clock speech, pulling out a notebook and pen with a cheeky grin and began taking notes as if she was in school again.
This truly wasn't even an interruption. She'd been doing that more often lately, at random intervals throughout the days or the week. She'd simply take a seat and quietly observe. Kate had always loved his lectures, a fact that went without saying, but she loved having something to talk about with him between cases even more. The brain was always evolving; science was always learning something new, and far be it from him to stop her from learning.
Often times on these occasions, she'd linger until all the students had left before offering tea and a walk through the quad while they discussed the class she caught. She would raptly listen to the numerous nicknames coined by Daniel for his students, and what they'd done to impress or irk him; he would hear of the cases she was working, and which might need his expert opinion.
They'd grown closer since he'd been released from Rexford this last time, despite his rocky relationship with Caroline for the following months, and regardless of the fact that they'd ended it on a sour note. She wasn't the woman he'd hoped she was. For so long he'd built up an image in his mind, and that image had fallen apart at the seams the moment he was off his meds. She couldn't handle him any other way but fixed, and Kate took him as broken as he was.
They rounded the quad a fourth time, each caught up in the other's story, sipping hot tea with no milk or sugar, and a latte chock full of espresso she gulped with a blissful look on her face he couldn't help staring at.
"You look happy," he said out of nowhere. She glanced over, startled not by his words, but by the way he said them. There was something oddly warm, endearing about the statement; it hadn't been a question, she realized, but a delighted observation.
"I am," she replied honestly. Come to think of it, she felt outright peaceful, a sensation she'd never experienced. "I'm always happy talking to you. You keep me sane," she said with a bright twinkle in her eye and a nudge to his elbow.
"That's right, mock the crazy man," he answered sarcastically, tossing his empty cup into a nearby trash bin. "It's nice, seeing you in my class. Reminds me of when you were actually in it. You're probably one of the few student's names I intentionally learned," Daniel said practically, as if stating a well-known fact.
"Really? I figured I had a nickname buried somewhere on your old roster that you didn't want to ever say to my face. Something like, That Annoying Girl That Always Sat In The Front And Constantly Raised Her Hand," she laughed.
"Oh, no, definitely not," he said seriously. "You cared too much to deserve a nickname."
"Well," Kate said softly, stopping short. "I'm honored then, that you made an effort to learn my name." She smiled, concluding this was probably the most personal Daniel had ever been with her, a conversation where she gained information about herself from his perspective.
"Don't let it go to your head or anything," Daniel said gruffly, and she laughed a little more. He liked the sound, more than ever, he thought idly. She was lighter lately, and he'd chalked it up to her divorce being finalized, and possibly his break up with Catherine, which he'd confessed too in one of their chats. She claimed she figured as much, that he couldn't pass up the chance to be with Natalie, in any form. He took in a breath as they crossed back towards his classroom, and reached out to grasp her elbow, holding her back on the sidewalk milling with students. "Did you…maybe want to, I don't know, have dinner, together…tonight?" he stumbled his way through it, but it was finally out there, the question that nagged and sounded impishly like Natalie.
She froze, eyes wide and questioning. "Really?" she asked surprised, before realizing how that sounded, and bounced back before Daniel could look hurt. "Yes, of course, I'd love too."
"Great, maybe seven?" asked Daniel, the nerves overtaking him.
"I'd like that," she said brightly and slid her hand down to squeeze his fingers gently. He looked at her a moment, and she wondered what he saw there. What she saw was a fundamentally different man, taking a leap he never would have taken before, and maybe dating Catherine had helped him with that particular fear.
They were jarred from their moment when a biker sped past them, dodging into Kate before straightening out.
"Hey! Watch it! Get off the sidewalk!" Daniel shouted, turning back to Kate. The smile had fallen from her face, and something else entirely replaced it. She was still, and he grasped her shoulders to get her too look at him. "Are you okay?" he whispered shakily.
She shook her head slowly before meeting his eyes. Her breath was coming more labored. "Daniel, something's…something's wrong…" she managed before she collapsed forward, falling limp in his arms.
Students froze around them, and Daniel desperately checked for a pulse. "Call an ambulance, now!" he barked out, cradling her body to his.
Two students from his class ran off to find Max and Dean Haley, while more than a dozen passing by whipped out cell phones and dialed 911 with a frenzy. One girl he knew and referred to as Know It All, stooped down, gently touching Daniel's shoulder and pointed silently to Kate's arm. He turned her arm, startled to find a broken off needle protruding from the upper bicep. Know It All pulled a pair of gloves and a sandwich bag out of her purse, explaining to Daniel she was pre med and had a lab in twenty minutes. She deftly pulled the needle out, dropping it into the sandwich bag as sirens wailed in the distance. He took the bag from her with a grim smile.
He'd have to add Know It All to the list of names he should learn.
Max, followed shortly by Dean Haley, came up behind him, Dean Haley demanding to know what happened, and Max concerned for Daniel. He wasn't able to defer to either of them as the paramedics rolled to halt, bursting from the ambulance with a stretcher and kits and a myriad of supplies that blurred together. They spoke to him, and their faces and voices swirled, overwhelming him with stimulation until Max was yelling at them, and Daniel was yelling in general. He wanted his music, his puzzles, and Kate. Max tugged on Daniel's arms, trying to pry them open so the paramedics could get to Kate, assess what happened, and he was having none of it.
"He's her partner, he won't let her go, so you may as well take him with you," he heard Max say in the distance.
"Dr. Pierce is an esteemed professor at our university, I assure you he won't cause trouble as long as he goes with the agent," Dean Haley threw in quickly.
The paramedics seemed to relent, knowing they wouldn't get anywhere trying to dissuade the man clutching their patient. Once he knew he was going with them, he relinquished his iron grip, allowing them to move her to the stretcher before firmly grasping her hand again. He had to have the contact to know she was still alive, still with him.
"I'll meet you at the hospital Doc," Lewicki called, dashing back into the university.
Daniel barely nodded, jumping up into the ambulance with the paramedics.
The ride to the hospital had never taken so long.
XOX
Of course, being in a hospital was no better.
It brought back so many memories, all the whirring machines and buzzing doctors, patients coughing in the hallways and the smells of soap and disinfectant. He hated it all, and he remained for Kate.
The perks of being a well-known neuroscientist with the PHD to prove it afforded him certain access that the average person could not get. Most knew of him at the very least, and his being there wouldn't be a hindrance.
The FBI was quickly notified, certainly by Max or Dean Haley, and within a half hour they'd sent Probert to take his statement. At least Reardon knew better than to send the cavalry to interview him. Probert he knew, and would talk too. And he had to admit, concern was present on the younger man's face.
Nearly forgetting the most crucial piece of evidence, he procured the broken needle from his pocket, handing it over. Probert nodded, finished collecting what he needed, and left.
Daniel dropped into the awful plastic chair with a heavy sigh. Finding the rogue biker would be impossible; no one saw anything, suspected anything. Hell, they couldn't even prove it was the biker. The thought made his stomach turn.
He leaned back uncomfortably, closing his eyes against the day, and tried desperately to think of anything other than what happened to Kate. The doctors told him they'd give word when she was stabilized, or they had a diagnosis.
He'd called her father from her phone, letting him know the situation. The man tried to sound firm and together, but Daniel could hear the pain and knew that Mr. Moretti probably wouldn't be coming to the hospital that night. He worked in a bar after all, and Daniel knew the vices of people in pain. Daniel assured him he wouldn't be leaving the hospital anytime soon, and he'd update him immediately. He could hear the sigh of relief on the other end of the phone, and ended the conversation shortly after.
It was more than two hours later that a warm hand shook him. "Dr. Pierce?" came a slightly chirpy voice. "You're Dr. Pierce, right, here for Kate Moretti?"
"Yes!" he nearly shouted, leaping up from the chair. It was a horrible idea, he realized, wincing at the pinch in his back.
"She's stable, for now. We can't be sure what the toxin is though. It's going to be touch and go until we figure that out, but you can see her if you'd like."
"Yes, please," he answered quietly. The doctor led him down the hallway, stopping at room 104. She gave him a small nod and left.
She seemed small from his vantage point, pale and somehow tired. An IV dripped and the EKG hummed a constant 'pip' as her heart beat.
"I'll only do hospitals for you," he whispered, resting his hand on top of hers. "They don't know what it is. Go figure, right?"
"You'd think with all this technology they could figure out where a simple drug came from, and what it actually is," a familiar voice echoed behind him. He whipped around, eyes going wide.
"Kate?" he demanded, looking back at the woman in front of him, and the one behind. One was utterly different from the other. The Kate speaking to him was dressed in an awkward baby blue tee shirt with some graphic art splashed across the front, and what was the late 90s version of over embellished flare jeans. Even her hair was in some silly flipped hairstyle he couldn't even recall her wearing.
"Not so much, but sort of," the hallucination responded cheekily. It definitely sounded like her. She looked much younger though, like when she was a freshman in his class.
"Why are you here? Usually it's always someone not associated with my problems or puzzles," Daniel asked, bewildered.
"Because it's different this time," Freshman Kate began.
"Different how? Why you, why not Natalie?"
"Natalie is going to be taking a back seat to this show, Professor. She's your subconscious, and me, I'm your conscious."
"That doesn't make any sense! I am conscious, so how am I speaking to my conscious?"
"How does it make any more sense talking to your subconscious creation than it does me?" Freshman Kate questioned back.
He gaped for a moment, utterly confused.
"So we're going to have to take this slowly," she sighed. "Something happened today. Your subconscious, Natalie, has always acknowledged your interest in Kate, while your conscious always acknowledged that Kate likes you. Today that changed; you finally let yourself consciously realize your feelings for her, thus forcing me to be your new confidant. In reality we call that progress, or making a move," Freshman Kate said sarcastically.
"Thank God real Kate isn't this annoying," he grumbled.
"Hey, I'm your hallucination, don't blame this on her."
"So I'm the annoying one?" Daniel demanded, gritting his teeth.
"Pot meet Kettle," she said snarkily.
He huffed, exhausted. He much preferred the soft dulcet voice of Natalie Vincent than this rather impractical version of Kate he'd created.
"Why the freshman version of you?" he asked warily.
"You liked me then, and you like me now. I'm the version you were more comfortable with, the untouchable, unreachable student. I was easier to deal with than the present version," she answered with far less sass. And she was, kicking her Converse covered feet back and forth as she sat on the bed opposite them.
"You have a good point," he mumbled. It was one thing to like a student; you could call it friendship, like minds, shared interest. But the fact remained that you couldn't have a relationship with a student. He could now, and it scared him.
He glanced up, but Freshman Kate was gone. Only then did he hear the sudden commotion outside the room.
Daniel moved to the doorway, straining to listen. He didn't have to try so hard; the patron at the desk was practically screaming at the poor nurse.
"What do you mean I can't see her! I'm her husband, at least for another few days, so I have every right to see my wife! I'm a DA for God's sake!" Donnie called.
Daniel shook his head. Here to see Kate, and he still felt the urge to flaunt his job title.
"Sir, I cannot let you in, regardless of your relationship or lack thereof," the nurse said tartly, voice rising exponentially. "You are not her next of kin."
"But who is? Check her power of attorney, I know I'm still that at the very least," he tried again.
She shuffled papers aside. "No, you're not that either," she answered flatly.
"But, but how? She said she wasn't going to change it," he said more to himself.
The nurse caved a little, feeling for the poor soon to be divorced man who'd gotten quite the surprise. "She changed her type of power of attorney about ten months ago it looks like."
"Type?" Donnie asked skeptically.
"Yes, it's Durable Power of Attorney now."
"Why would she do that?"
The nurse shrugged, non-committal. "It means she left power of attorney to someone who may have a mental illness or be incapacitated in some manner. If something happens to her, essentially that person's say can't be overridden by law regardless of their state of mind," she answered him. Daniel froze in the doorway, turning to face the woman lying quietly in the bed. "You didn't Kate," he whispered, more to himself. Ten months ago would have meant he was still in Rexford. It wasn't something they'd ever discussed; she'd gone and changed it beneath all of their noses without anyone's consent. When she woke, he'd have to question her sanity.
"Oh, you have got to be kidding me! Him!" Donnie yelled, noticing Daniel lingering for the first time. Daniel could see the barely contained rage pouring off Donnie in waves, and wasn't frankly surprised when, before he could blink, the DA was punching him in the jaw.
Daniel saw stars, leaning heavily against the wall clutching the side of his face. He heard the nurse yelling for security, and suddenly he couldn't stand up fast enough. He managed his way to the desk, wobbly but able, and put his hand on the phone she picked up. "Don't," he said weakly. "Let him have this."
The nurse looked angrily at Donnie, but conceded to Daniel's wish. Donnie seemed stunned himself, all the fight gone, replaced with bitter sadness. He walked into Kate's room and closed the door behind him.
"It is me, isn't it?" Daniel asked quietly. "Her power of attorney."
"You are Dr. Daniel Pierce, correct?" He nodded. "Then it's you," she confirmed. She leaned forward conspiratorially. "I'm a big fan, you know. You're books are so inspiring, and the brain is fascinating."
He glanced down at her nametag. "Look, Pamela, I was wondering if you've heard of a nameless drug making people drop like flies in moments. I'd love to have new information to analyze, see how it affects the brain."
He tried to be slick, like when Kate interrogated people, appealing to a shared goal.
She smiled, looking around before leaning in a little more. "Other than the standard ones? We've had six patients come in in the same condition as your girl. The doctors think it's gotta be a new street drug, something mean."
"Why new?" he asked.
"Well, it's been putting the patients into prolonged coma's, followed by…" Pamela trailed off. "Look, the doctor's around here have been calling it 'Darwin,'" she said with an eyeroll.
"Odd drug name," he commented.
"Thing is," she began, "All the patients dosed had some sort of disease or medical issue. The doctor's think we've got an angel of death drug dealer out there," Pamela said grimly.
Daniels heart seemed to stop at the new information, brow knit in confusion. "It wasn't meant for her," he muttered.
"What's that?"
Daniel looked up with a forced smile. "Nothing, thank you, Pamela, so much for the information. Glad you enjoy the books." Before he could escape, she procured one of them from her bag.
"Could you sign it?" Pamela questioned shyly. After the information she'd given him, he would have read from it personally.
He nodded, penning in his name. It was meant for me, rattled around his head as he did so.
He pushed open the door to Kate's room, letting Donnie know the time he'd given him was quickly running out. Donnie remained slumped in his chair; Daniel took the one across.
"I think I knew a long time ago," Donnie spoke distantly. "You managed to come up in almost every conversation, and at first I dismissed it as a leftover crush from college. Professors can be a gravitational pull of their own, I know that much. But the years went by and it was like you were everywhere. We fought about it, all the time. The whole reason I think I ended up cheating on her in the first place is because she was so captivated by you," he looked up then, meeting Daniel's gaze. "You don't actually have to be with a person to cheat on them."
Donnie laughed, but it was humorless. "We separated, and she practically flew back to you, needing your expertise to consult on cases; bunch of bull shit, she never needed your help. I was surprised when she went to DC, even less surprised when she got demoted and once again, went back to you. Like I said before, either acknowledge this thing for what it is, or let her go. She deserves more than to be led on for another decade."
Daniel leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees and clasping his hands together. "I asked her out for dinner, before this happened." He wasn't sure what made him forfeit that piece of information; maybe he owed him in some cosmic way for all the pain he'd inadvertently caused.
Donnie nodded, standing up from the chair. "Thanks, for letting me see her. I'm not sorry for hitting you though, you deserved that," he said before leaving the room.
"At least he's honest," Freshman Kate said.
"Yeah, now," Daniel conceded. Then he changed the topic. "That drug, that was meant for me."
"I figured as much," Freshman Kate agreed. "But why isn't she in a coma then? Sure, she's asleep, bogged down with other drugs, but the patients before her went into coma's almost instantly."
Daniel perked up. "She's healthy."
"Clearly," Freshman Kate mocked, nodding towards her doppelganger.
"But all the other patients had something wrong with them, me included. This angel of death dealer is going after already damaged people! Kate was a mistake, someone probably knocked him off his course, I mean, the needle was broken off in her left arm, I was right across from her, he was probably aiming for my right shoulder!"
"That's all great theory, but you can't prove it, the doctor's can't prove it, and the police have nothing to go on."
"Thanks, you're so helpful," Daniel said witheringly.
"I'm your conscious," Freshman Kate stressed.
"Then give me Natalie, you two are the only hallucinations I've had and I could really use some help here!"
She made a noise in the back of her throat. "You don't get Natalie, but you do get-"
"Hey Doc, thought you'd be needing this. How is she?" Lewicki asked, coming in the door at that moment with a duffel full of clothes, books, puzzles, and his much needed music.
"She's stable, so they say. I think the drug was meant for me," he said with wave of his hand.
"Doc, are you sure you're okay? I know this happened in front of you, are you decompensating?"
"No, no, I literally think this was meant for me," Daniel explained. "I talked to the nurse, she said they've had six other patients come in with a mysterious drug in their system, and all six patients have underlying diseases or diagnosis that's been exacerbated by the drug so much so that they went into prolonged coma's and…" he hesitated, knowing that the nurse didn't want to frighten him. "Died."
Lewicki looked stricken. "Kate's not in a…"
"No, she's not," Daniel said. "Because Kate is healthy."
"So…this drug is what? Targeting sick people?" Lewicki questioned.
Daniel nodded. "I don't know how, honestly. The nurse said they're calling the drug something ridiculous like Darwin, that there's some angel of death out there using sick people as lab rats for a modified drug."
"Survival of the fittest," Lewicki stated. "But how do you modify a drug to only attack sick people?"
Daniel shook his head. "I don't think you do."
Lewicki looked at his watch. "Did you want me to stay? And what did you want to do about your classes?"
Daniel took Kate's limp hand once more. "You're training to be a teacher. So teach. I won't be back until she is," he said without so much as a hint of sorrow for releasing the reins to his protégé. Lewicki had proved himself fully capable, and if Daniel could stay with Kate, he would."
Lewicki smiled weakly. "If you're sure. I'll let Dean Haley know." Max clapped him on the back of the shoulder, quietly leaving the room. He was neither needed nor wanted; he'd be back with more puzzles for the Doc later. For now, the only puzzle he wanted was the one lying helpless before him.
XOX
Daniel awoke in the straight-backed armchair hours later with his hand in a brutal vise like grip. He blearily took in his surroundings, realizing it was Kate gripping his hand so hard. He thought maybe she'd woken and been afraid, but that wasn't the case.
Kate was seizing, violently.