Dousing The Fire

by garden-nomes

If Skins:Fire had to end in death, doom and gloom, the least they could have done was elaborate more on Naomi's story. So here's my version. WARNING: Avoid if you haven't seen Fire, or if you don't feel like burying yourself in tissues.

A/N: Ok, people. This is my attempt at the parts of Fire that we didn't see/should have seen. I can't guarantee it'll be any good, because it's hard for me to actually read through all of it and edit it without needing a plantation of tissues. I can't help it, really. Naomily seem to have wormed their way into a very special place in my heart, and it virtually breaks every time I think of them being separated by anything, particularly death, which we all know is pretty final. Either that, or I more of a sap than I think I am. Or both. Whatever.

I know I'm not alone in wishing it had been done differently, and while the ending to this piece unfortunately doesn't change the canon ending, it at least gives more of what we would have liked to have seen from Fire. Because even though I have the power to write what I wish, I thought to myself "well, ok, if she HAD to die, they could at least have paid more attention to that storyline, instead of Effy ultimately shagging her way to a prison cell." Honestly, I thought she would have come down with an STI sooner than found her way to serving time at HM's pleasure.

Having said that, as usual, all typos are my own, and I blame either the streams of tears I wrote part of this through, or the iPad (as per).

Anyway, on with it...

Disclaimer: I do not own skins. Damn shame, that. I also know nothing about what it's like to suffer from end-stage cancer, so please forgive any mistakes/discrepancies. I am fortunate enough to not have known anyone who has suffered from it.

---

Naomi lay in her hospital bed, as Effy lay next to her. Naomi's eyes were half open, as the pain, the searing ache that plagued her every breath would not allow her to rest properly.

"Is there anything I can get you?" Effy asked, quietly.

"No." Naomi whispered, the cancer having weakened her so much that speaking had almost become an effort. If she spoke quietly and took it easy, she could manage alright.

Effy reached over to gently stroke the fine regrowth of hair that was in her best friend's eyes. "How are you feeling?"

Naomi's eyelids opened only slightly, as her instinct reverted to its desire to roll her eyes like she felt like doing at that question, but she had barely the energy to do it. "Like complete shit." She managed to whisper.

"Well, that's better than yesterday. Yesterday it was death warmed up." Effy said, trying for humour.

Her best friend's eyes closed, and then slowly opened again. Her dry, cracked lips formed a small smile. "Cheeky bitch." She croaked. "Didn't anyone tell you not to poke fun at cancer?"

"Says the one who made jokes about her bald minge on stage."

"Black humour at its finest." Naomi deadpanned. Her brow furrowed as she swallowed.

Naomi's breath became shallow as a wave of pain flooded through her, and she shut her eyes, a groan coming from her throat. Her breathing became a series of short pants as the agony subsided, leaving the background throb that coursed through her instead.

"You need me to get a nurse for some pain relief?" Effy asked.

Naomi shook her head as best she could. "No."

"Will you be ok while I go out for a fag?" Effy asked.

"Yeah." Naomi whispered.

"Ok." She kissed Naomi's forehead gently. "I won't be long, Naoms."

Naomi relaxed against the pillow as Effy left the room, and closed her eyes, drifting off into her own thoughts. She was so tired. So tired of fighting. At first, the fight had been against the cancer, but when the cancer didn't respond, and began to take over her body, the fight had come to a stage where it was too tiring to even think of. It had become automatic. She had become tired of fighting, that there was not much that kept her breathing.

The only thing that kept her going was the thought of Emily. Even thousands of miles away, the girl that had stolen her heart at age twelve still meant the world to her, and was the only thing stopping her from giving in entirely and just succumbing to what seemed to be inevitable.

Her mind was flooded with memories that she was too tired to stop. A clumsy kiss in a backyard at some house party. Those looks they shared on that first day at Roundview. The cake Emily had made at Cook's party. The tone of her voice as Emily asking her not to go outside the boat. The conversation they had in the tunnels when they were selling Thomas's weed. The second time Emily kissed her, at Panda's party. The lake, where Naomi finally gave in to her feelings and kissed Emily until the redhead took charge and made love to her by the fire.

And then she thought of how gutted Emily must have been when she left the next morning. She hadn't meant for Emily to wake up, but it seemed as though the then redhead was already tuned into Naomi's rhythm, and could sense when she was not in proximity.

Naomi then thought about the night at Gobbler's End where they took mushrooms and tried to make love as quietly as possible with JJ in the tent beside them. Naomi remembered how she had protested, but Emily's touches and kisses were so insistent that Naomi eventually surrendered. The following day, when Naomi held her hand protectively while they all looked for Katie. That day Emily had posed as Katie to take an exam, and Naomi had remarked how she looked nice.

That wasn't the entire truth, Naomi had thought Emily looked completely hot dressed as her sister would. And that tense conversation, how Naomi chickened out and said to Emily they should just be friends. Those moments later when Emily said she would miss her while she was away in Cyprus, and Naomi couldn't ignore the tug towards her anymore, slamming her against the lockers and kissing the absolute life out of her.

Taking Emily back to hers, blissfully finding that her mother wasn't home, and dragging Emily upstairs to make love. The conversation that followed, when Emily walked out, upset. How she wished she could have said something that would have stopped her from leaving. But she had been too afraid, then. She remembered the Love Ball, when Emily had fought with, and stood up to her sister, and told the entire ball how she felt about Naomi.

The amazing summer they had spent together. Naomi had originally planned to go to Cyprus, but stayed in Bristol to be with Emily. They enjoyed the most carefree summer, seeing movies, spending time with each other, and shagging each other senseless. By that time, Katie had mellowed to their relationship, and became more of the supportive sister that Emily deserved to have.

Katie. Naomi came to the realisation that Emily would now need her twin more than ever. She knew that Katie would be upset as well, for Emily, more than anything, but also at Naomi. But at least Katie couldn't carry out her threat to kill Naomi if she ever hurt Emily, the cancer was doing a good job of that all by itself. She and Katie had formed a tolerable bond over the years, and deep down she knew that Katie cared about her and loved her. She could see that Naomi was good for Emily, and if her sister was happy, Katie was happy.

Naomi shifted her position s best she could, to lay on her side. Her memories continued, but they were sadder. Sophia. The only regret she had, other than not telling Emily about her illness. But Naomi was conflicted, because she had sworn never to hurt Emily again. And her dying of cancer wasn't like cheating on her with Sophia, this was much more serious. When Emily had found out that Naomi had cheated, the taller girl had sworn to do anything to heal her pain and make things alright again. She loved her too much to simply let her go. And so she began to chase Emily, the same way Emily had chased her. Because they were Naomi and Emily, and they were meant to be together. She thought back to her confession in Freddie's shed, before they knew he had been murdered. How it felt to be in Emily's arms again, to kiss her after what felt like ages of not really having the right to do so, even though they still lived under the same roof.

They literally had to tear each other apart, in order to come back together stronger, and after Naomi finally stopped fighting herself, and her feelings, she confessed her true love for Emily, in front of everyone. She wasn't going to be a coward anymore, she was going to step up, take the responsibility and admit to Emily, and to everyone just how she felt. Emily forgave her, then, Naomi had managed to make up for the pain she had caused Emily, and Naomi had promised her girlfriend that she wouldn't hurt her ever again.

But this was different. There wasn't anything that Naomi could do to make this up, and she knew it. She knew she should have told Emily months ago, and relented when Effy kept prompting her to call her, to tell her.

Her mind moved again... Thinking of her time with Emily when they went travelling. Making love on the beach in Goa, in the midst of an Indian summer. Tropical beaches in northern Australia, and backpacking through Europe. She cracked a smile as she thought of that time they shagged on the balcony of the Hôtel Pensione in Paris, very early one morning before the rest of the city had awoken. And then afterwards, when they lay on the balcony wrapped up in the the duvet that Emily had dragged off the bed before.

"I want to be with you forever." Emily had said, her head nestled into Naomi's neck, laying soft kisses against her throat.

Naomi finally felt the tears that had been slipping from up her half open eyes for the past few minutes. Christ, she thought to herself. I need to tell her, before it's too fucking late... I don't care if she's mad, she loves me, she wouldn't leave me when I have so little time left.

"Hey." Came Effy's voice, as she came back into the room. "I hope I wasn't gone too long."

Effy took in her friends distraught expression and the tears that were streaming down her cheeks. "Naoms... What's wrong?" She asked, as she sat down gently next to Naomi.

Naomi mustered as much energy as she could, and her ice blue eyes met Effy's ocean blue ones. "E...Emily." She wearily whispered. "Eff... Call her." Naomi's last restraint on her composure corroded away like the cancer that at away at her insides. "I need her, Eff." She croaked out. "Please."

Effy nodded. "Ok, Naoms. I'll call her."

"Now, Eff. Please." Naomi said, a defeated tone lacing her voice.

---

Effy got up and walked out to the balcony. She pulled her phone out of her coat pocket and searched her contacts for Emily's name. She took a deep breath, dialled the number and waited for Emily to pick up. It took a few rings, but finally her voice answered.

"Hello?" Emily replied, sounding a bit sleepy. It then occurred to Effy that it was early evening in London, meaning it would be late night or very early morning in New York.

"Emily. It's Effy."

"Oh, hi Eff." Emily replied, followed by a yawn.

"I'm sorry if I woke you up." Effy said, her voice slightly shaky.

"No, it's ok. What's up?" Emily asked. "Are you ok?"

"Emily..." Effy hesitated. She didn't know how to break it to Emily that her girlfriend was dying and might not have that much time left. "It's... It's Naomi. She's in hospital..."

"What?! Is she ok?" Emily asked, and Effy could hear the panic in her voice.

"No." Effy paused for a moment. "Em... You need to come home. She needs you."

"Effy... What is it? What's wrong with Naomi?"

Effy sighed, a tear slipping from her eyes. "I'm so sorry, Emily. She made me promise not to tell you."

"Effy... You're scaring me, what's going on?"

"Emily, she has cancer."

Emily was silent for a minute. "What?"

"Emily... She's asking for you. You need to come as soon as you can."

"Cancer?"

"Yes. Please Emily, you need to come. She needs you."

There was a long pause. "I'll get the next flight I can." Emily said, her voice sounding broken. "Effy... How bad is it?"

Effy wasn't sure how to tell her that Naomi's cancer was terminal and she didn't have much time left.

"Bad." Effy replied. "I'm so sorry, Emily, you have no idea."

Emily couldn't stop the tears that slipped down her cheeks. "Effy...be honest with me... How long has she known?"

Effy shut her eyes tightly, feeling the tear that slid down her own cheek. "Too long."

"Fuck." Emily cried. "Oh, fuck..."

Both women were crying now, a rare expression of emotion for Effy, and an expression of anguish from Emily.

"Effy. You tell her to hang on until I get there, yeah?" Emily said, between the sobs that wracked her body. She couldn't help it. Naomi was absolutely everything to her, and the mere thought of being without her left a huge gaping hole inside both Emily's heart and soul.

"I will. Hurry, Emily. As quick as you can. She needs you here."

"I know." Emily said, before hanging up.

Effy heard the tone that signified that Emily had hung up, and ended the call. She slipped the phone into her coat pocket, and started the walk back to Naomi's room.

Naomi lay in the same position Effy had left her in, her eyes still half open, her thoughts still on Emily. She was thinking back to the first time she had seen her. When they were both twelve. Emily and her sister Katie were knew to the school, and made an impact, because they were twins. Katie, Naomi had thought, was always too brash, too out there, the sort of girl that Naomi would avoid like the plague.

But Emily, on the other hand, was much gentler. She liked Naomi, and the other girl knew this, but the fact that she liked Emily too, and in a way that was too intimate to be just friendship unsettled Naomi, and so she had pushed Emily away. It caused a conflict in Naomi as well, because she enjoyed Emily's company, it was just the other feelings that confused her. Emotions and desires that took her a few more years to understand.

Naomi heard the door open and slowly close, as Effy came back into the room.

"She's on her way." She said.

"Did she say anything?"

"She needs you to hang on until she gets here." Effy replied.

Naomi nodded, and closed her eyes, as sobs began to wrack through her tired, broken frame. Effy slowly climbed back onto the bed beside her best friend and cradled her gently while she cried. The room was silent, except for the soft sniffling sounds that came from Naomi.

Effy felt her phone vibrate once in her pocket. She pulled it out and opened the message from Emily.

"Heathrow. 10am tomorrow. Flight BA382."

It was short, and contained no pleasantries. Effy had truly not expected any, and figured Emily was too much in shock to behave any other way than automatically. Much in a way that Effy was doing, the knowledge that her best friend was dying was overshadowing the fact that she was probably going to prison for a few years. She wasn't sure how she could do that without Naomi to support her when she needed it.

She hadn't even told Naomi about that aspect of her work troubles. It didn't seem as important as the fact that Naomi was dying, and she knew it, and that Emily was going to be shattered.

"Naoms." Effy said, gently. Naomi opened her eyes. "She'll be here tomorrow morning. I'll go meet her at the airport."

"Good." Naomi croaked. "Because I sure as shit can't. I'd scare her and the other travellers." She deadpanned. "I look like I was sneezed out by a Minotaur."

"You know she won't think that."

A weak smile formed on Naomi's lips. "I know." She whispered. "Eff... Was she..." She couldn't bear to finish the sentence, because the thought of Emily being upset tore at her heart so much, it ached so horribly, even more than the persistent aching that flooded its way through her bones and muscles with almost every breath.

"Shhh." Effy soothed. "You need to not think about that, Naoms. She'll be here soon."

Naomi lay her head on Effy's shoulder. "I can't make this better for her, Eff. I don't know how."

"You can't." Effy replied, and as soon as she did, she knew that it was not a fair thing to have to say, that it wouldn't make Naomi feel any better about the situation. But Effy had done everything except get on her knees and flat out plead with Naomi to call Emily, to tell her before it was too late. She knew herself she should have called earlier, regardless of Naomi's insistence.

"Way to make me feel better about it, Eff. That's fucking great." Naomi said sadly.

"Listen to yourself, Naoms." Effy said, as gently as she could put it. "You say you can't make this any better for her... I can't make you feel any better for not having told her months ago. You should have told her when they said you needed chemo."

Naomi remained silent for a while, as her big, sad blue eyes studied Effy's features. What she was saying wasn't a sudden realisation to Naomi. She knew it herself, but true to her usual form, she stubbornly refused to, trying to be hopefully optimistic, choosing to believe that it wasn't really that bad, that the cancer wasn't going to kill her, and she wouldn't have to leave Emily alone.

Emily. Alone.

Jesus fucking Christ.

The thought of that made her groan as she shut her eyes, trying in vain to fight off another flood of tears. Effy held her close.

"I'm sorry, Naoms. But..."

"Eff..." Naomi interrupted, voice breaking as her eyes met Effy's. "I know. I fucking know."

Effy nodded, and Naomi's head slumped against her shoulder. "I'm such a fucking twat."

"I won't argue."

"Bitch."

Effy smiled at the tone in Naomi's voice. There was a little of the sarcasm that she loved about her in it.

"Oh, Christ." Naomi groaned.

"What is it?" Effy asked. "Do you need anything?"

"No... I just thought... Katie."

"Oh."

Naomi lifted her head slowly. "Emily is going to need her." She said, seriously. Effy had seen Naomi become more serious in the pat few weeks, but this was unlike anything she had seen before. "She's going to need you too."

"Do you want me to call her too?"

Naomi thought for a minute, and her blue eyes slowly blinked, and Effy caught sight of the tears that slipped out as Naomi nodded her head.

"Anyone else? What about your mum?"

At the mention of her mother, Naomi crumbled into another flood of aching tears. Effy held her close, trying to soothe her best friend. Naomi mustered enough energy to push at Effy. "Just fucking do it, Eff." She croaked. "Please."

---

Effy got up off the bed and left the room, going back out onto the balcony. She lit a cigarette and took a deep drag, the nicotine flooding her senses. She took out her mobile and thumbed through her contacts, realising that her hands were shaking. She shook them and steadied herself as best she could, picking the right contact and dialling the number.

The call was answered, and Effy could hear background noise that sounded festive. "Hello?"

"Katie... It's Effy."

"Hi babes, long time no hear. How's life living with Campbell treating you?" Katie replied, and Effy could hear the cheeriness in her voice. It didn't make what she was about to say any easier at all. She tried to think of how to break the news. After all, how many ways are there to say a friend is terminal and going to die?

"Eff? You there?"

"Naomi is in hospital."

"Hold on, I can't hear you, let me find somewhere quieter." Effy heard muffling on the end of the line, and then it became clear. "Sorry babes, bloody Christmas parties, you know how it is. Now, what were you saying about Naomi?"

"She's in hospital."

"What? Are you having a laugh?" Katie scoffed.

"I wish I were. Christ knows." Effy said, and Katie suddenly became worried, because this was a tone she had not heard Effy use in years. It was broken, scared. Almost distraught. "She's really sick, Katie. I've called Emily and she's on her way, but... She asked me to call you too." The words just flowed from Effy's lips. She never had been one to waste words.

"What the fuck, Eff? What's wrong with her?"

"It's...cancer."

"Cancer?!" Katie exclaimed. "Fuck, tell me you didn't just say that."

Effy felt the twinge in her chest upon hearing Katie's scared tone. The elder Fitch twin was always so confident, so sure of herself, Effy had never heard her sound like that before in her life, and it shocked her to the core. She couldn't help it, she started crying.

"Effy?" She heard Katie's voice. "Effy... Oh my god. You're not joking, are you?"

"No." Effy whispered.

"Ok. I'm coming now. When will Emily be here?"

"Tomorrow morning."

"I'll be at yours in about an hour."

"No... We're at the Royal." Effy replied.

There was a long pause. "Fuck. How bad?"

"You know how stubborn she is." Effy said, and she wished she could say it jokingly. Because all their friends knew just how stubborn Naomi could be. But it wasn't funny this time.

"Shit. Ok, I'm leaving now. I'll see you both soon." Katie said, as she hung up with tears filling her eyes. True, her and Naomi had their differences at times, but she wouldn't wish this on her, and certainly not on her sister, either.

Effy closed the call and lit another cigarette, needing to calm her nerves before making the next call to Gina. As far as she knew Naomi hadn't been back to Bristol for months, and hadn't spoken to her for a while, either. If Effy thought calling Katie was hard, she knew calling Gina was going to be near impossible to endure.

However, she knew she had no choice. She took the last long drag of her cigarette, feeling the smoke burn its way down her throat. She exhaled, and fumbled once again through her phone contacts, dialling another number. "Fuck's sake." She mumbled under her breath, as the number rang.

"Top 'o the evening!" Came the male response when the phone was answered. Effy half-smiled at hearing the cheery greeting that came from Kieran.

"Kieran. It's Effy."

"Hello there, Effy. How are you and Naomi? How's London?"

"London is great, Kieran."

"Good to hear. What can I do for you?"

"Is Gina in?"

"Of course, I'll get her for you." Kieran replied. "Gina! Phone for you, love!" He shouted. "She won't be long."

"Thanks, Kieran."

Effy waited and then Gina's voice came on the line. "Effy! What a pleasant surprise. I haven't heard from either of you in a while, how are you both?"

Effy wondered if the ache in her heart was going to cease anytime soon. It would be the third time in one evening that she had delivered the message, and it was probably the hardest one of all. Emily had been hard, but it was only now, when she had to break the same news to Gina that it all caught up with her.

"Effy?"

"I'm so sorry, Gina." It was all she could say. Because she was sorry for a lot of things. The same things she had found herself being sorry for all those months when Naomi had wanted the truth hidden from anyone who wasn't involved. Effy had no choice in knowing, she was her flatmate, her best friend, she would know eventually. But Naomi was stubborn enough to not let anyone else know, to think that everything would be okay, and that this was something that they would laugh about one day, when they were in their fifties after having been friends for so many years.

"What's wrong, love?" Gina asked. Her warm friendly tone didn't have the usual soothing effect that Effy thought it did. It made her feel sick, because she knew that this wasn't news that a mother should have to hear. She shouldn't be telling her, Naomi should have done it. Months ago. Before this all got out of hand.

"Gina... I wish I was calling with better news." Effy said, before swallowing. "You need to come to London. Naomi is in hospital. It's serious."

"What has my daughter got herself into this time?" Gina asked, and Effy cringed at the worry that was seeping into her voice.

"She has cancer, Gina. There may not be much time."

There was a long pause before Gina spoke again. "Oh, god."

"I'm so, so sorry, Gina. I wish you would have been told sooner, but you know how stubborn she is." Effy said, more tears threatening to spill, the toll of the day finally taking its course.

"I know that more than anyone, dear. Kieran and I are leaving now. Which hospital?"

"The Royal."

"Alright. We'll be on the next train." Gina replied. Effy wondered how she managed to keep her voice so level.

"I'll let her know. Katie will be here, too."

"Good. Emily is going to need someone."

"I know."

"Thank you for calling me, Effy." Gina said, sadly.

"I'm very sorry I didn't sooner."

"I know you are. But you know what she is like."

"Yeah."

"See you soon, love." And then line went dead. Effy couldn't hold back the tears anymore, and let them overtake her. The cold winter wind whipped around her body, and she hugged herself further into her the warmth of her coat, trying to fight off the chill that flooded through her. It culminated in a sick feeling in the pit of her stomach. But this was worse than a hangover, worse than a stomach bug. A hangover could be slept off, and a stomach bug treated.

But how do you treat the loss of your best friend? There wasn't a pill that could solve this sickness she felt inside, and before she knew its she was bent over the trash can that sat on the corner of the balcony, puking up the acid in her empty stomach.

She steadied herself, and lit another cigarette. But the nicotine did nothing to soothe her this time, if anything it just made her feel worse. She stubbed it out, and flicked it off the balcony, not caring where it landed, and went back inside.

---

A nurse was attending to Naomi when she re-entered the room, which now had an awful atmosphere inside it, thick, acrid and heavy, as though death was licking at the paint on the walls, edging ever closer. It made Effy shiver horribly.

"She's resting now." The nurse said quietly, giving Effy a sympathetic smile, before leaving the room.

"Thank fuck, I thought she'd never piss off." Naomi croaked, her tone bringing a half-hearted smile to Effy's lips. "You were gone fucking ages."

"Sorry." Effy said, sitting down on the bed. She took Naomi's hand in hers, feeling a sense of alarm at how weak and frail she was. She gently squeezed it before she spoke again. "Katie should be here soon. Gina and Kieran, too."

"Ah, the whole family, then." Naomi said, tiredly.

"Yeah." Effy said.

Naomi shifted onto her side, before exhaling slowly. "You're all going to need each other."

"I know."

"She's going to be so mad at me, Eff..." Naomi said.

"She will. But she loves you. She will forgive you."

"I'm dying, Effy. I can't stop it. I'm abandoning her. I told her I'd never hurt her again, and now I have to hurt her so much." Naomi said, wearily. "We're Naomi and Emily. It wasn't supposed to be this way." She began to break down again, wet spots appearing on the pillow as tears slid from hopelessly sad blue eyes. "This is going to break her so much." Her hand reached out and she gripped Effy's wrist, urgently. "You have to promise me, Eff. Promise me you won't let her do anything stupid. As much as I love her, I don't want her to follow me where I am going. She can't, do you understand me?"

The seriousness in Naomi's tone chilled Effy to the bone. She knew full well what she meant. Her phone buzzed in her pocket. The message was from Katie.

"Got here sooner than I thought. What room are you in?"

Effy thumbed a reply.

"I'll come meet you."

"Who is it?" Naomi asked.

"Katie. She's here, I'm going to go and meet her."

"No time like the present." Naomi mumbled.

Effy's phone buzzed with a reply.

"Ok, I'm at accident and emergency in the waiting room."

Effy stood up and left the room, walking to the lift. A&E was on the ground floor, and they were a couple of floors up. The lift opened, and she stepped inside, the car occupied by one other patient, and a young couple with a newborn baby. Effy thought how ironic it was that she was sharing the lift with someone who had just started life, when her best friend was on her way to losing hers.

The lift opened on the ground floor, the low hum of background noise, filled with doctors barking orders and bleeping machines, created a contrast to Naomi's room in the oncology ward, which was as quiet as a tomb.

Effy spotted Katie straight away, wearing a red leopard print strapless dress with white fur trim around the bottom, a black coat around her shoulders. She would have laughed, had the situation been any different, because only Katie Fitch would turn a Santa type outfit into leopard print hell.

"Katie." Effy said, as she walked over to her. Katie pulled her into a tight hug, 'Fitch hugs' they were called, Effy remembered. "I'm sorry." She mumbled, as she began to cry again.

"Oh, Eff..." Katie said, as she just held her friend close.

"I'm not sure how much more of this I can take, Katie." Effy stammered. "This is one of the worst nights ever."

Katie knew better than to say anything smart. She settled for a question instead. "How is she?"

"Upstairs resting."

"Right. Let's go, then."

The two took the lift back up to the oncology ward, and they walked, hesitantly towards Naomi's room.

"Katie..." Effy said, as she stopped in the corridor. "Take a second... You need to be ready for this."

Katie took in Effy's expression, which was so sad, she could barely believe it. She nodded, and took a deep breath. It was now or never, she thought to herself.

"Alright. I'm ready."

Effy walked towards Naomi's room, and they both stopped at the window. Naomi was lying on her side, facing away from the window, and Katie could see her reflected in the window on the opposite side of the room, the darkness of the night creating enough of a mirror to show it. She saw how frail Naomi looked, and immediately knew.

"She's... She's dying, isn't she?" Katie said, her voice small with realisation.

"Yes." Effy's reply came out flat and emotionless. "There is nothing they can do for her."

"Christ." Katie said, her voice breaking as a tear slipped down her cheek. "Oh god, this is going to kill Emily." She said, before bursting into tears. Effy slid her arm around Katie's shoulders, and Katie cried into Effy's shoulder. "Fucking dozy bitch, why the fuck didn't she tell her? Why didn't you?!"

"She asked me not to." Effy said. "She didn't think it would come to this. But the radiotherapy didn't work. Neither did the chemo. It's only today that she asked me to call her. I've tried..." Effy swallowed, "Tried to get her to tell her, so many times. You know how she is, Kay, she doesn't want to hurt her."

"This isn't just going to hurt her, Eff! It's going to fucking destroy her!" Katie snapped, trying not to raise her voice too much.

"I know! Don't you think I know that?! I feel bad enough as it is."

"Fuck." Katie sighed. The distance between her and her twin had not stopped the sense that Katie had, the sharing of emotions between her and Emily. They still spoke regularly, of course, but being a twin, they could feel each other, and even an ocean between them could not stop it. Katie felt a sense of grief filling her, and knew that it must be a thousand times worse for Emily, and it broke her heart.

"You need to go in and talk to her, Katie. She asked for you."

Katie nodded. She knew she had to. She pushed open the door and stepped inside the room, and a crushing, squeezing sensation tugged at her insides. Her heels clicked on the floor, and she gently pulled over a chair, as Naomi turned over, opening her eyes slowly.

"Well. This is a bit fucking dramatic, even for you, Campbell." Katie said, her voice unsteady, unable to control her lisp.

"You know me, always one to put on a show." Naomi said quietly, with a smile.

Katie took Naomi's hand gently and held it in hers. "How are you feeling?"

"Fantastic. Might go for a jog, later." Naomi deadpanned.

Katie laughed and shook her head. "Dozy cow." Katie kissed the back of her hand gently. "Why didn't you tell her, Naoms?" She asks, sadly.

"Didn't know how to."

"You were being a coward, again." Katie remarked.

"Probably. You know I didn't want to hurt her."

"I know. But this... Naomi... This is wo-"

"Katie," Naomi groaned, "I know, ok? She worked so hard, for the internship. I couldn't let her give it up."

Katie huffed. "That's bullshit, Naoms, and you know it. There are other internships. There's only one of you, and you mean the fucking world to her. How is she going to survive this?"

"I don't know, Katie." Naomi said, quietly. "But she has to. As much as I want to stay with her, I have no choice in it. Neither does she." Katie had never heard Naomi be this serious, and it scared her.

"Just...how long do they think you have?"

Naomi stared into Katie's eyes for a long moment. She desperately wished they were Emily's, and while it was good to see Katie, it made her heart burn more, wanting her twin there quicker, before it was too late.

"Weeks, at the most." Naomi said, finally.

"Oh, Naoms." The elder twin replied.

"It's all a bit shit, isn't it?" She said, quietly.

Katie shook her head. "How can you be so fucking flippant?" She asked. "Aren't you scared?"

Naomi closed her eyes and then opened them again. "I've had a lot of time to think about it." She said. "Death doesn't scare me. I've accepted that I'm going to die. My only concern is Emily."

"Oh, now you are concerned about her." Katie said, rolling her eyes.

"Don't. You know I've always been concerned for her. Even when I was a bit of a cunt to her in college."

"A bit?" Katie raised an eyebrow.

"Beside the point, Katiekins."

"You should have told her sooner."

"I know. But even if I did, it wouldn't have changed much. Wouldn't have made it any less shit."

"Bollocks. She would have been here for you, and you could have had more time together." Katie said.

"I know. I regret that quite a bit."

"I want to kick your arse so much right now, Naoms."

Naomi smiled. "I know. And I bet it burns you up inside to know that you can't." She gave Katie a small smirk.

"Fuck you." Katie laughed.

"Nah... Always preferred your sister." Katie smiled as Naomi winked at her.

"Bitch."

Naomi chuckled, softly. "Love you too, Katiekins."

Katie stood up and helped as Naomi pushed herself up into a sitting position, propped up on thick pillows. Katie looked at the cat shirt that Naomi was wearing and laughed.

"Can't believe you ever denied you were a lezzer." She said, pointing to Naomi's shirt.

Naomi smiled. "Ems bought me this shirt when we were in India. I wear it quite a bit. Helps me feel closer to her, somehow." She explained.

"You know she is going to be mad, yeah?" Katie said, quietly.

Naomi nodded. "I know. I can't help that."

Katie took her hand again and squeezed it gently. "I'm sorry."

"For what, Katie?"

"For being such a cow to you all those times."

"Katie... Don't, ok? Water under the bridge." Naomi said, squeezing her hand back gently. She had a flash of memory. Her and Emily holding hands through the cat flap. A tear slipped out of her eye and ran down her cheek, splashing onto Katie's hand.

"Naoms? What is it?"

Naomi shook her head. "Just a memory, that's all."

"A bad one?"

"God, no. A good one. The night I told Emily that I needed her. Years ago."

"You always needed each other, even I saw that."

"Yeah." Naomi said. After a long pauses she spoke again. "Katie?"

"Yes?"

"She's going to need you so much, Katie. I want you to promise me that you'll take care of her. Both you, and Effy. You need to make sure she doesn't give up on herself."

Katie nodded, because she was too choked up to speak. She had never heard Naomi speak like this before. Their differences aside, Katie was stricken to be even having this conversation.

"I promise." The elder twin said, finally.

Naomi nodded. "Thank you, Katie. I mean that."

The door opened, and Effy came back into the room. "Hey. Gina called, they are on the train about halfway here."

"Ok." Naomi said. Effy picked up the other chair and sat on the other side of Naomi's bed. A silence hung in the air between the three of them. "By the way, Katie. What's with your dress? You look like a slutty Santa's little helper."

Katie laughed. "Bitch. I was at the fucking office Christmas party when Effy phoned."

"Ah. Trust you to work the leopard print into it." Naomi pointed out. "Nice to see some things don't change."

Katie smiled. "I can see why you became a comedian."

"It's better than her cancer jokes." Effy said.

"Cancer jokes?" Katie looked at Naomi, appalled. "Really, Naoms?"

"Self deprecating humour, Katiekins. Besides, you'd be surprised how many people laughed at the one about the effects of radiotherapy on my minge. Nearly brought the house down." Naomi smirked.

Katie laughed, despite her disbelief. Effy sat there, expressionless, as the other two chuckled.

"Sorry if I fail to see the humour." Effy said, finally, getting up from her chair. "I'm going out for a fag." She said, as she left the room.

Naomi sighed. "Clearly." She muttered. "Katie... D'you mind?" Naomi said, looking to the door that her best friend had just vacated.

"You'll be ok?"

She nodded. "Yeah."

Katie stood up and followed Effy out to the balcony, where she stood, trying to light a cigarette, the chill in the air causing her fingers to fumble with the lighter.

"Here." Katie said, taking the lighter from her and flicking it, shielding it with her hand and holding it towards Effy, who leaned closer, allowing the flame to lick at the end of her cigarette as she inhaled. She leaned over the balcony as she exhaled the smoke from her lungs. "Got one to spare?"

Effy handed her pack to Katie, who sparked one up before handing the packet back. "Thanks."

They stood there, leaning over the balcony. Effy had smoked half of her cigarette before she spoke again.

"It's sick, how she fucking jokes about it." She said.

"I know." Katie replied. "But it's how she deals with shit."

"It's stupid."

"So is cancer."

A sombre silence fell between them.

"She asked me to take care of Emily." Katie said, quietly.

"She said the same to me. She doesn't want Emily following her."

Katie laughed and shook her head. "Typical. The only person she is afraid for is Emily. Not even herself."

"Naomi has accepted it. It's leaving Emily behind that she can't grasp. I think that's why she has waited so damn long."

"Bloody Campbell."

"Yeah." Effy paused for a minute. "I may not be able to fulfil her request, though."

"Why?"

"I'm... In a bit of trouble. Work stuff." Effy said, taking a drag on what as left of her cigarette. "Actually, it's major trouble. I'm probably going to prison for a while."

"Jesus, Eff. What have you done?"

Effy shrugged. "Insider trading."

"You don't fucking do things by halves, do you?" Katie said, shaking her head. "Does she know?"

"She knows... But I didn't tell her I was most likely going to prison. It's not something she needs to think about. She has enough on her plate."

"I suppose." Katie conceded. "So, you half lied to a dying cancer patient. Who is your best friend."

"Pretty much. I thought it was kinder than explaining why I couldn't fulfil her dying wish."

Katie sighed. "This is fucked up. On so many levels."

"I know."

"How long before they... I mean, what's gonna happen if they lock you up before she..." Katie stopped. "Fuck. I can't even say it, Eff."

"I know." Effy said, sadly. "And I'm not sure." She stubbed out her cigarette. "I suppose I'll have to tell her if it comes to that."

Effy's phone then began to ring, and she answered the call.

"Hello?"

"Effy, it's Gina. We just got off the train and are getting a taxi. We'll be there shortly, dear."

"Ok, Gina. We'll meet you in A&E. Bye."

Effy hung up her phone and finished her cigarette. "Gina and Kieran just got off the train, they'll be here shortly."

"Shit. How did she take it?"

"Eerily calm. I don't think it's going to hit her until she gets here."

"Christ." Katie muttered. "Well, lets get down there, then."

The two went to the lift, and Effy pressed the button and they waited. A bell punctuated the air around them and the doors slid open. They stepped inside and Katie pressed the button for the ground floor.

When the doors opened onto the hubbub of the emergency department, Effy couldn't help but feel déjà vu. This night had to stop repeating itself.

"There they are." Katie said, looking towards Gina and Kieran. "Come on."

The two walked over, and Effy steeled herself as best as she could. "Gina."

Gina turned around, and Effy took in her expression. She could see that Gina was holding it together as best she could, but that the dam wouldn't hold. It was going to break, and there wasn't anything anyone could do about it. Effy stepped forward and hugged Gina. "I'm so sorry, Gina. I really am." She had said it so many times it felt like it was a mantra that just came out automatically. Effy nodded at Kieran who smiled, sadly, and rested his hand on Effy's shoulder.

Gina asked, as she pulled away. "Hello, Katie. I wish the circumstances were different, but it's lovely to see you."

"I know what you mean, Gina." Katie replied, hugging the elder Campbell. "Hi, Kieran."

"Katie."

"How is she?" Gina asked.

"Resting upstairs. Gina... It's not good."

The older woman nodded her acknowledgement. "I need to see her, Effy." She said, gently.

Effy nodded, and led them all to the lift. Her hands were shaking as she pressed the button, nerves getting the better of her. They all stepped in and the doors slid shut, and Effy felt Katie's fingers wrap around her own, holding them tight to stop them from shaking so much. They hadn't seen each other in a while, but Katie always knew what would calm her down.

The lift opened onto the oncology ward once more, and Effy exhaled slowly. They all walked out, and down the hallway to Naomi's room.

Katie hung back."I'm...going to see if I can call Ems." She said. Effy nodded.

"Effy, you look tired. Can I get you anything?" Kieran asked.

Effy knew she hadn't eaten a thing all day, but couldn't stomach the thought of food. "Just a coffee."

Kieran nodded and wandered off in search of coffee. They had not yet reached Naomi's room, and Gina's steps were getting slower, until she stopped. Her hand reached Effy's arm, and squeezed. "Effy, I want you to be honest with me."

"Ok." Effy replied.

"How long has she been sick?"

Effy couldn't bear to meet Gina's eyes as she formed her reply. "Too long. She didn't think it would get this serious."

"Oh, god."

"She wouldn't listen to me. I kept telling her to call you, and Emily. She's just so stubborn."

"And Emily knows?"

Effy nodded. "I've called her. She'll be here in the morning."

"Good. Naomi needs her."

"I know."

"There's nothing that can prepare me for this, is there?"

Effy shook her head "I'm sorry."

Gina nodded, and smiled, sadly. They had finally come to the door, and Effy shut her eyes, because she couldn't look at the fallen expression on Gina's face when she saw Naomi lying in bed, resting, looking so sick, so far removed from the daughter she knew. Taking a deep breath, she slowly pushed open the door and walked into the quiet room.

She put her handbag on the chair, and gently sat down on the bed beside her daughter. Naomi shifted, and slowly rolled over, her eyelids flickering open. Recognition flooded her as her eyes focused on Gina's form, and her mother's heart broke as she registered the sadness and even the guilt in Naomi's eyes.

"Mum... I'm sorry." She croaked, as Gina took her into her arms and gently stroked her hair.

"Shhhh... It's ok. It's ok..." Gina said, even though she knew the exact opposite to be the truth. She knew how dire this was, and how scared Naomi must be.

Effy watched from outside the room as Gina held her daughter. She saw Katie partway down the hall, talking on the phone, presumably to Emily.

"The cafeteria is closed, but there was a coffee machine downstairs, I hope it's alright." Kieran said, as he came up to Effy and handed her a paper cup.

"Thanks, Kieran." She said, as she took the cup from him and blew over it to cool it, before taking a sip.

"How are you holding up, love?" Kieran asked, as he placed his hands on Effy's shoulders. "The truth, now."

Effy's eyes met his, and Kieran's expression softened. "Oh, my dear girl." He said, as he pulled Effy into a comforting hug, taking care not to spill her coffee. "It's a right fuckin' mess, isn't it?" It wasn't really a question, so much as a statement.

Effy heard the telltale click of Katie's heels as the elder twin approached. Kieran released Effy from his embrace, and she turned to face Katie.

The look on Katie's face was something that Katie really wished she wasn't witnessing. The question on her lips was one she probably knew the answer to, but before she could stop herself, the words came out.

"How is she?"

"Devastated." Katie sniffed. "And extremely angry." Her eyes met Effy's. "At both of you. So... Be warned, yeah?" There was an iciness in her tone that unsettled Effy, but she knew that it was justified. She nodded slowly. "Gina's in there with her?" Katie asked.

"Yeah." Effy replied.

Katie looked through the window at Gina and Naomi, who were now talking quietly between themselves. "Fuck's sake, Eff. If I had known it would be this way, I wouldn't have been such a cunt to her in the past. I feel horrible."

"She forgives you."

"I know." Katie said, shaking her head. "Still doesn't change it, though."

"No." Effy said. She turned to Kieran. "You should go in and see her, Kieran."

"Yes, I suppose." Kieran gave a small smile, and went into the room. She saw Naomi smile as he did so, glad to see the man who had become her surrogate father. Naomi had been shocked to find him in bed with Gina at first, but eventually warmed to the Irishman, growing to love him quite a bit over the years. He stepped up to the bed and leaned over, placing a soft kiss on Naomi's forehead, before taking a seat in the chair beside her bed.

Gina leaned over and kissed Naomi's forehead before getting up and exiting the room. The minute the door closed, she broke down in tears, her composure and need to be strong finally slipping away from her. Katie crossed to her and out her arms around her shoulders, and Gina almost collapsed as the grief bled from her heart.

"Come on, Gina." She said, softly. "Let's go sit down." Katie led Gina to a chair by the wall and sat with her, taking the older woman's hand in her own and softly stroking the back of it. She knew there was nothing that she could say that would make this any better, so instead settled for comfort through touch.

Effy took out her cigarette packet and opened it. There were four cigarettes left, and she had only bought the pack at lunchtime. "Fuck." She whispered to herself.

Kieran came out of Naomi's room, and went to Gina's side, sitting by her and pulling her into his arms as she sobbed quietly.

Kieran nodded to Effy, who went over to the three of them. "She's very tired. She is glad we are all here, but she needs to get some rest."

Effy nodded. "You and Gina are welcome to come back to the flat. You too, Katie."

"I...I'm staying. Emily asked me to." Katie said.

"Ok."

"Eff... Can I bum another fag?"

"Sure." Effy replied, beginning to walk out to the balcony. She heard Katie's heels on the floor behind her, as well as two extra sets of footsteps that hesitated, but soon followed slowly behind.

Once outside, Effy lit up two cigarettes and passed one to Katie. She was startled, when she saw Gina hold her hand out to Effy. The brunette just handed over her already lit cigarette. She turned to Kieran and raised a questioning eyebrow. Kieran smiled politely and nodded. Effy lit another cigarette for herself, and passed the packet to Kieran, along with the lighter.

"It's your last." Kieran said, surprised.

Effy shrugged. "Doesn't really matter."

Kieran lit the cigarette, and threw the empty packet into the trash can, handing the lighter back to Effy.

"There must be some way... Something else they can do?" Gina said, quietly. It was a question that Effy wished she could answer more positively. She wasn't even sure how to answer her, and finally settled for something which was practically passing the proverbial buck.

"Talk to the doctor, tomorrow." She said, after taking a long drag from her cigarette.

"I will, you can count on that."

"Pretty surreal." Katie said, finishing the last drags of her cigarette. "Being here, for this reason."

The other three murmured their agreement. It was indeed surreal, and something that seemed so unfair. This was the point in life where Naomi was meant to be making her start, not conceding to the inevitable end.

"Right. I'm going back in." Katie said, stubbing out her fag and going back inside.

Effy put out her own cigarette, no longer interested in smoking it. "Well, I guess we should get going. I have to pick up Emily tomorrow at Heathrow."

"We'll be back first thing." Kieran said.

Effy nodded. "I'm going to go and say goodnight to Naomi. Give you two a few minutes."

---

Effy went back inside, the warmth of the hallway hitting her, contrasting the freezing temperature outside. She spotted Katie talking to a nurse, or rather, what looked like arguing with her.

"...I know there are rules, but you don't understand." Katie said, "She's fucking dying, yeah? My sister, who loves her more than life itself is flying back from New York as we speak to be with her, and asked, no, begged me to stay with her. My sister is going to need me when she is gone, and I'll be fucked if I'm going to start letting her down now simply because of your fucking rules."

Effy stepped towards the two of them. "I'm sorry, but I can't allow it." The nurse said.

"Yes, you can." Effy said. "I won't be staying this evening, so if you wouldn't mind, Miss Campbell and I would appreciate you allowing Katie to stay." She added, rather diplomatically. The nurse looked at her, seemingly unwilling to change her position. Effy could see that she was getting about as much success as Katie had. "Look. I've known Katie since she was sixteen. She's not the sort of person you want to piss off. Please, have a little fucking compassion."

The nurse hesitated, taking in the weary expressions of both women, and looking across to Naomi's room. She had been a regular presence, monitoring Naomi's condition. She was used to Naomi's attitude, and thought the patient was quite witty at times, even if in a very black way. But she couldn't blame her, not when she knew she had very little time left.

"Alright." She said, finally.

Katie's face softened. "Thank you." She said, nodding her acknowledgement.

"I'll... Get you a blanket and a pillow." The nurse said, before walking away.

Katie sighed. "Thanks, Eff. I'm not sure I could have controlled myself much longer."

"Emily wants you to stay, it's the least I could do."

"Yeah. So. Shall we?"

Effy nodded, and they went back into Naomi's room. She was lying back on the pillows, her eyes half open.

"Hey." Effy said. "I'm taking Kieran and Gina back to the flat. Katie is going to stay here with you tonight." She told Naomi, as she gently stroked her hair.

"You...don't have to, Kay." Naomi said, her voice almost a whisper. The evening had taken its toll and she was exhausted.

"Yeah, Naoms. I do. Emily asked me to."

"Oh." Naomi closed her eyes, before opening them. "Guess I...don't have a...choice, then."

Katie shook her head.

"Alright. Kieran and Gina will be back tomorrow, and I'm going to pick up Emily in the morning." Effy said. "Get some rest, Naoms. No loud parties."

Naomi gave her a small smile. "And ruin this atmosphere?"

Effy shared the smile with her friend. "See you tomorrow. Bye, Katie."

"See you, Eff. And... Thanks."

Effy left the room as the nurse came in with a pillow and a blanket for Katie, as promised. She gave Katie a small smile, before leaving the room. Silence remained between them for a few moments.

"Kay... How is she?" Naomi asked.

"Angry."

"I figured." She replied. "And mum?"

Katie paused. In all the years she had known Gina Campbell, she had never seen her look the way she had tonight. "When Emily told me about Gina, years ago, her face lit up. She's such a stark fucking contrast to Jenna, you know? Always cheery, accepting, never an unkind word for anyone and never wavering in her support of the two of you, even when you were being an idiot about things." Katie paused. "I've never seen her like this, Naoms. She broke down in my arms."

"Fuck." Naomi whispered.

"Yeah." Katie said. "You're a bit of a complete twat."

Naomi had no comeback for that.

"Nothing snarky to say?"

"No. For once... I agree with you." Naomi said, her voice laced with a quiet sadness.

"First time for everything, eh?" Katie said, with a slight smirk.

Naomi shifted slightly. "Fuck off."

Katie laughed, slightly. "Not a chance. I don't want to incur Emily's wrath."

Naomi smiled, because she knew what Katie meant. Katie had a reputation for being a raging bitch at times when people pissed her off, but Emily was always seen as the quiet one in terms of temper. Naomi knew different, though, and Emily's temper manifested itself in different ways. Unlikely to blow up directly, Emily would often resort to the silent treatment.

"The two of you are so different, you know." Naomi said.

"Yeah, I know." Katie replied. "I realised that after our fight at the Love Ball."

Naomi smiled at the memory. "Such an eventful night."

Katie nodded. Naomi began to cough, and Katie stood up to get Naomi some water. She poured it into the cup and held it up to Naomi's lips, letting her drink. Naomi swallowed the cool liquid, and rested her head back against the pillow. Katie noticed her shiver, and pulled the blankets over her. "You should try and get some sleep."

"I know." Naomi said. "It's just... Effy usually sleeps with me."

"Oh." Katie replied. "Oh..." She said again, as it sunk in as to what Naomi meant. She thought about it for a brief moment, before stepping out of her heels, and shrugging off her jacket. "No funny stuff, yeah? Just... Let me know if you need to puke or something. This dress is new." She said, as she grabbed the extra blanket and climbed into bed net to Naomi, spreading the blanket over herself.

Naomi nodded. "Same old, same old, huh, Katiekins?" She said, with a weak smile.

"Shut up, Naoms." Katie replied, but there was no aggression in her tone. They lay silently for a few moments. "This is...weird."

"You think it's weird? I'm in bed with my girlfriend's twin sister." Naomi joked.

Katie huffed. "Yeah, well... Like I said, don't get any ideas." She said, gently.

"Katie... Even if I had the energy... and as much as you look like Emily... You're not her."

"I know, Naoms." Katie replied. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be. Everyone is on eggshells around me, I'm tired of it." Naomi said, quietly. "But you... You are... No bullshit. You tell it like it is. I've always admired that about you, Katie."

Katie felt tears pricking at her eyelids. "Thought you found that annoying." She said.

"No." Naomi replied. "It's a good thing. I've always known I could count on you to call me out on it... when I fuck shit up."

Katie sniffled, feeling the tears slip out.

"Don't, Katie." Naomi said. "No point in it." She reached up and gently wiped at Katie's cheeks.

"You've never really hated me, have you?"

Naomi shook her head. "Just like you have never hated me. You just wanted to protect Emily." She exhaled slowly. "I've always known that." She said, as she closed her eyes.

"We both love her."

"Yes." Naomi whispered.

Katie reached over and stroked her hair softy, and lay her arm gently across Naomi's stomach. "I'm not hurting you, am I?" She asked.

"No."

"I know I'm not her, but..."

Naomi gave Katie a weak smile. "You make a good substitute, though."

Katie leaned over and kissed Naomi's temple softly. "You tell her about that, or anyone else..." She said, in a whisper.

Naomi laughed, softly. "Nah... schtum."

They both lay silently until Katie heard Naomi's breathing even out as she fell asleep.

"Jesus, Naomi." Katie whispered, watching over the dying girl's sleeping form.

---

The next morning, Katie awoke in much the same position, and Naomi was still sleeping. Not wanting to disturb her, Katie very carefully got out of bed and straightened herself out.

The door to the room opened, and the nurse Katie had argued with the night before came in to check Naomi over.

"Good morning." She said, quietly. "Did you sleep alright?"

"Yes." Katie nodded. "Uhm... I apologise for being so rude last night, but I was rather stressed. I only just found out last night that Naomi... Well, it was a bit of a shock. Not as much of a shock as my sister is going to get, though..."

The nurse smiled politely. "I have heard worse. Under the circumstances, I accept your apology." She said, sympathetically. "You mentioned your sister last night... She's Emily?"

"Yes. How did you know?"

"Naomi has been here for a few months. Once she gave up insulting me all the time, she spoke of Emily from time to time. From the way she speaks about her, I can tell she is special." The nurse explained, as she set about checking Naomi's vital signs.

Katie nodded, feeling a sense of sadness. "She is the love of her life."

"And...she'll be here...later..." Naomi croaked, waking up.

"Morning, Naomi. How are you feeling?" The nurse asked. "Any pain?"

"No more than the usual background agony." Naomi said slowly.

"I'll see about getting you some relief for that. How did you sleep?"

"Better, with my Emily surrogate." Naomi smiled, looking at Katie.

The nurse looked confused. "Emily and I are twins." Katie said.

"Oh, I see." The nurse smiled. "Well, I will leave you both to it. Naomi, you don't have a temperature or anything, but I'll come back with some pain relief shortly."

"Thanks, Nurse Ratched." Naomi deadpanned. The nurse laughed, and exited the room.

Neither Katie nor Naomi said anything for a moment.

"How do you really feel, Naoms?" Katie finally asked.

"Like I've been bulldozed." Naomi replied. "Why don't you go home and get a change of clothes and a shower? I'm not going anywhere."

"Mmm nope. Not until the others get here. You're stuck with me 'til then, Campbell. A twin's promise is watertight."

"Bollocks." Naomi said, half laughing, before falling silent. "Kay?"

"Mmm?"

Naomi held out her hand and Katie sat on the bed, taking Naomi's hand in her own. "I know Ems asked you to stay last night, but I want to thank you for doing so. It was really comforting."

"Sappy git." Katie joked.

"Yeah, you should ask Ems sometime how sappy I can be." Naomi smirked.

"Naoms... Have you figured out what you're going to say to her?"

Naomi shook her head slowly. "Figured I'd wing it." Her shoulders gave a weak shrug. "You spoke to her, Katie. I know how upset she is going to be to see me like this."

"Upset isn't really the word."

"I know that." Naomi replied. "I guess I'll just hold her as best as I can. It's the least I can do."

Naomi's attention moved to the window, and she smiled. Katie turned around to see Gina and Kieran standing outside. She nodded for them to come in.

"Hello, love. How are you feeling?" Gina asked. "And tell me truthfully."

"Awake, and in the usual amount of pain, which my keeper has gone to get me relief for." Naomi said, before turning to Katie. "Alright, they're here now... You should go and refresh yourself."

"Are you sure? It's no trouble for me to-"

"Katie..." Naomi interrupted, a slightly whiny tone lacing her voice. "It's fine. I'm not going anywhere today." She gave Katie a weak smile.

"Alright, then. I shouldn't be anymore than an hour." Katie leaned over and kissed Naomi's forehead. She stepped back into her heels and walked out of the room.

"Darling, Effy is on her way to pick up Emily now." Gina said.

"Good." Naomi replied, her heart feeling lighter at the thought of having Emily by her side. While she knew she would be upset, she didn't doubt that her presence would be more than comforting.

---

Jingle bells. It was a ridiculously cheery Christmas tune, but Effy couldn't help but wish it wasn't this time of year. She had the feeling every time she heard it now, she would think of this moment. The moment she would give anything not to have to be experiencing.

She made her way through the terminal, checking the arrivals board for the flight from New York. The flight had landed, and she was just now waiting for sight of Emily. Through a sea of people, she sees her, taking in the distraught expression on her face. What's more, from the look of it, Emily's thoughts were far away as she made her way through the terminal, and Effy couldn't even begin to think what was going through her mind.

As she came closer, Emily registered Effy's presence.

"Hi. How are you?" Effy said, even though she knew it was a ridiculous question.

She thought of all the expressions she had seen on Emily's face in the time she had known her. Emily had very expressive features, and Effy could remember many of them, from happiness, to wonder, surprise, sadness and many in between. But she had never seen this look before. It was intense. Intensely angry. Effy knew exactly why, because Katie had warned her.

She could not blame Emily, then, when in response to her question came a stinging, hard slap to the side of Effy's face. Effy gasped in shock, and when she looked back, Emily had already began to walk past her. Immediately she started after her.

"Emily..."

"SHUT UP!" Emily snapped at her, turning around to face her. "I don't want to hear it, Effy. Let's just go."

They exited the terminal and hailed a taxi.

"The Royal, please." Effy told the driver.

They remained silent on the ride there, Emily occasionally sniffling, her head leaning against the taxi window. Effy didn't know what to say, if she could say anything that would be of any use to Emily.

The taxi pulled up outside accident and emergency. Emily unclipped her seatbelt and looked at Effy with an expression that was a mix of anguish and disgust. She shook her head slightly and opened the taxi door, stepping outside. As Effy made to get out, she stopped her.

"Stay where you are." She said, her tone clipped and angry. "Do you not think that you've already taken enough away from me as it is? You didn't even deserve this time with her. You stole it from me!"

"Emily, I-"

"I'll never forgive you for that!" She snapped, before slamming the taxi door and walking into the hospital. Effy was left shocked in the back seat. She knew Katie had warned her, and she expected it, but it still hurt to hear what Emily said, because Effy knew that she was right. She could understand where Emily was coming from. Effy exhaled slowly, once more feeling the guilt of not having called her sooner roll over her.

"Where to now, love?" The taxi driver said.

Effy hesitated for a moment. "Nowhere." She paid the fare and exited the taxi and pulled out her phone and thumbed through it for Katie's number.

"Hey, Eff."

"Katie." Effy replied, as she fumbled through her bag for her cigarettes. The chill in the air made her fingertips ache as she struggled to light it. "Fucking lighter. Where are you?"

"At the hospital. Gina has just been speaking with the doctor. She is upset, as can be expected. Kieran is consoling her now. Have you picked up Emily?"

"We just got here. She's on her way up, but I'm going to hang back a bit, she's in a bad way." Effy explained. "She slapped me. Though I really can't blame her."

"No." Katie replied. "Be thankful she only slapped you, yeah?"

"Yeah. I'll be up after I finish my fag." Effy replied, and then hung up the phone.

Effy leaned back against the wall and took a long drag, allowing the nicotine to fill her lungs. She thought about how lousy things had become. She'd all but lost her job, was most likely going to prison, and her best friend was dying. It was the totally lousy icing on the cake. Effy smirked, humourlessly, remembering that saying 'bad things happen in threes'.

It couldn't really get any worse.

She shut her eyes and briefly thought back to college, where they had all met each other. Back when the only worry was which party or club you were going to on Friday night, or how many spliffs to smoke, or whether to just bunk off the day and chill out with your mates.

She thought of the others for a moment. She felt they should know what was going on, but wasn't sure how to reach them. Panda and Thomas were off in the US somewhere. She didn't have contact with JJ, they never were that close. Cook was a good friend to them all, but after Freddie being found murdered and Cook bludgeoning Foster to death, he had gone on the run and almost dropped off the radar entirely for the past few years, and Effy hadn't heard from him in almost a year. He had a soft spot for Naomi, and it was going to hurt him to hear that she was gone.

She finished her cigarette, and stood outside a little longer, contemplating lighting another one.

---

Emily barely took any notice of what happened during her flight to London. She was deeply lost in her thoughts, and not only her heart, but her very soul was aching. Naomi was the love of her life. Once they had got back together at the end of college, they grew stronger together, and had never been more in love with each other. They had all the time in the world, back then, and now, that time was going to be cut short.

What's more, Naomi hadn't told her. While she knew Naomi likely had her reasons, she couldn't help but be angry and feel betrayed. She thought they had got past the point of keeping secrets. And this wasn't something as simple as forgetting to buy milk, or losing something important. Naomi was dying.

When Effy told her, she was rendered speechless as the air was sucked out of her lungs. Cancer. How? Emily thought. She seemed fine the last time they spoke on Skype, which was a number of months ago now. Naomi had said the camera on her laptop wasn't working, and she wasn't able to get it serviced. Emily wondered now if that had been the truth. She thought about how the emails seemed to be less frequent, too. She thought nothing of it at the time, work as busy and she had no reason not to trust Naomi.

Now, as she was standing in the hospital corridor, it all became clear. She had just exited the lift, and the first person she saw was Katie. Her twin stood up and rushed towards her, crushing her close in a tight hug.

"I'm so sorry, Emsy." Katie said, quietly. Emily let her sister hold her as she burst into tears for what felt like the hundredth time in the past twelve hours. Katie held her tightly as hugs sobs wracked her body. She couldn't hold herself up, and let Katie lead her to a chair, where they both sat down.

Gina came out into the corridor and sat down next to Emily, taking her hand. "Hello, Emily dear. Naomi is resting, but I know she would love to see you."

"Gina." Emily replied, her voice cracking. "Is...is she...oh Christ..." She didn't want to ask, because deep down, she could feel what the answer would be.

"I'm so sorry, Emily. They've done all they can." Gina replied, sadly.

"No..." Emily muttered, before breaking down again. Both Katie and Gina held onto her, as she sobbed silently.

Effy had come back upstairs, and was standing by the window, a little distance from the other three. Strangely, she felt like an observer to all this, and knew from her earlier actions that Emily was distraught, so she figured it was best to just step aside for the moment. She looked at Naomi through the window, to see that she had her eyes closed and was probably resting. Effy heaved a heavy sigh, and then felt a presence beside her. She looked to her right to see Emily beside her.

"I can't go in." She said. "I just... I just need some more time."

"There isn't anymore time, Emily." Effy replied.

Emily sighed, and then sniffled. "I'm so angry with her." She said, and Effy could hear the hurt in her voice. "And you. I can understand her not telling me sooner, but YOU."

"She asked me not to, Emily. I know you may not believe me, but I tried to tell her several times to call you. She didn't want to-"

"I swear, if you say she didn't want to hurt me, I'll do more than just slap you." Emily spat.

Effy stared at her. "She's dying, Emily." She said.

"I know." Emily replied, after a short pause, before bursting into tears once more. Effy pulled her into her arms and held her. She felt Emily's fingers grip around her shoulder, and then gently pulled away.

"Be strong. You need to be strong for her, Like she was strong for you." Effy told her. Emily nodded, and wiped her eyes. Walking to the door, she opened it, and stepped inside the room, feeling an unsettling aura surround her.

Naomi's eyes flickered open, the scent of vanilla and lilies permeating her nose. Emily's perfume. A wide smile spread across Naomi's face.

"Hey." Naomi said, quietly.

"Oh, Naoms..." Emily said, moving towards her bed. She pulled back the covers and climbed in beside her. Naomi lifted her arm as best as she could, and Emily snuggled in, just like she always did. Naomi kissed her forehead and Emily once more began sobbing. Naomi held her close and let her cry, because she knew it was all she could do.

"I'm sorry, Ems. I know it doesn't make it better, but I am sorry." Naomi said, slowly.

"Why Naoms? Why didn't you tell me, babe?" Emily cried. "I thought we were past that."

"I know." Naomi replied. "I didn't know how to. I didn't want you to give everything up. You worked so hard for it, I couldn't let you drop out."

"That's for me to decide. There's other internships. I only have one of you. You're so fucking stupid, babe. You're more precious to me than any job, don't you understand?"

"Ems... I know, okay?" Naomi said, in a defeated tone. "You have no idea how much I regret not telling you sooner. I thought that... Well, I didn't think it would come to this. Then when they told me the treatment wasn't working... All I could think of was... How am I going to tell Emily?" She continued. "There was never going to be an easy way."

Emily lay her head on Naomi's chest and tried to control her sobbing. The dying woman gently stroked her fingers through Emily's hair.

"I remember your hair was this colour the first time I saw you." Naomi said. "And I thought... My god, she is beautiful. I fell for you then, you know? I didn't know what it was at the time, but as I grew older, I figured it out. And sometimes... Sometimes I regret being such a twat to you while we were in college..." Naomi paused for a moment, the words making her tired. "But now... I realise that I don't think I'd change it. It made us stronger, you know?"

"Yeah..." Emily whispered. She closed her eyes and let Naomi's touch calm her down, like it always did. True, there were times when it brought her to a frenzy, but this was soothing her, and even though her heart was still so heavy, it was something she couldn't deny that she needed.

"But I've always loved you, Em. Even when I was pushing you away."

"I've...always loved you too." Emily replied. "I always will, you know that."

"Yes." Naomi replied. Emily shifted so that her eyes were level with hers. She leaned forward and gently kissed her lips. They were dry and cracked, but Emily refused to care. They were Naomi's, and that was what mattered. The kiss was gentle and tender, but Naomi could feel the love behind it, and every other emotion that filled Emily up. It was a bittersweet kiss, but Naomi didn't care, it was Emily, and every kiss they shared was special.

"I know...you're disappointed in me." Naomi says, quietly. Emily couldn't think of what to say... Because it was true, she was disappointed, along with all the other emotions waging war inside her. "For not telling you the truth, that is. I know I promised never to hurt you again, and now it's a promise I can't keep. But I am sorry for that, Ems. It's just... You matter more to me than the truth does."

Emily stared into Naomi's beautiful blue eyes, the same eyes that had captivated her all those years go in middle school. She knew how serious Naomi was being, she had obviously thought long and hard about it all.

"How...Naoms? How am I supposed to keep it together? I don't know how to be without you. This isn't like me being in New York, babe." Emily said, sadly.

Naomi squeezed her eyes shut, and the opened them again, tears slipping out. "You spent years following me. Chasing me. Until I gave into you, because I couldn't deny how I felt anymore." She said, her voice breaking. "But this time... I'm going somewhere you cannot follow, do you hear me? You have to promise me."

Emily shook her head. "But-"

"No buts." Naomi said gently, cutting her off. "I mean it, Emily. I am dying, but you have your life ahead of you. You and me... We will see see each other again. I'll wait for you on the other side. I'll always wait for you, because we... We are Naomi and Emily. We're meant to be."

Emily had by now sobbed herself out entirely, but the tears still streamed down her face, punctuated by sad little sniffles. "I don't know if I can promise you, Nai. I don't know what I'm going to do." She said, sadly.

"You told work what was going on?" Naomi asked.

"Yes. They said to take as much time as I need. They all know what you mean to me." Emily replied.

"Then here's what you're going to do. Be with me until... Well, you know. I know it's not the time you deserve, and you know how sorry I am for that. And also..." Naomi reached over and slipped the gold band from off her finger, and taking Emily's hand, she slipped it onto her finger. "I'm giving this to you for not only safekeeping, but as a symbol of my love for you. It's never ending. And I'll go on loving you after... The time comes."

Emily let the tears consume her once more, as she kissed Naomi softly. "You bet your arse I'm staying with you." She said.

Naomi smiled. "That's my girl."

Emily cuddled into her side and they were silent for a moment. "Naoms?"

"Yeah?"

Emily paused for a moment. "I'm not sure I want to know..."

"Know what?"

"How long they think you have."

Naomi sighed. "Weeks, at the most." She said, in a resigned tone. "But Ems... Now that you're here... I can hang on a bit longer because I know you are with me. You make it better just by being here, and I really am grateful you came back."

"There wasn't a question of me not coming back, you know that."

Naomi nodded. "I know."

"Ohhhh..." Emily whispered. "What am I gonna do without you, babe? This changes so much."

Naomi held Emily close as best as she could. "I know, and I'm sorry. You have to go on, though. No matter how hard you find it. We will always, always love each other. No matter if I'm alive or not. I know it's going to hurt. I know it will seem like it's something you can't recover from."

"How am I supposed to recover from losing you?" Emily said, sadly.

"You just have to try, Emily. You need to be brave like you asked me to be brave for you all those years ago." Naomi thought back, and could still clearly hear Emily's voice pleading with her to be brave after at first night together. The night Naomi gave in. "And you have Katie, and Effy, and Gina..."

"They're not YOU!" Emily cried. "I don't want to speak to Effy ever again."

"Emily." Naomi said seriously. "She's our friend."

"She's a shitty friend."

"No, Em. I'm a shitty partner. I asked her not to tell you, even when she insisted. It's not her fault, you can't be mad at her. Be mad at me."

"Oh, don't think I'm not."

"I knew you would be. After all, it's not like I broke a teacup."

"No, you're fucking dying and leaving me all alone." Emily spat. "Just great."

Naomi held Emily as she cried silently for a few minutes before speaking again. "I'm sorry, Naoms."

"Don't be. You have every right to be angry." Naomi conceded. "I can handle it. I've had a lot of time to think about it."

For the next few more minutes, the two were silent again, just breathing, holding each other close.

"Babe?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you scared?" Emily asked.

Naomi paused, briefly. "Yes and no."

Emily squeezed Naomi gently in her arms, silently asking her to explain.

"I'm not scared of dying. I know it's inevitable now. So, there's not much point in being afraid." Naomi said, slowly. "I'm scared for you, though. I just want what's best for you, even though I'm... Bowing out early."

Emily softly kissed Naomi's cheek. "Graciously put."

"I need you to promise me that you'll at least try, Emily."

"I will..." Emily said, her voice threatening to break again. "If... I can't... You won't be mad, will you?"

Naomi shook her head. "I'll understand. I'll always wait until the day I see you again. But, I just hope it'll be later, rather than sooner."

"I know."

"I love you so much, Emily."

"I know." Emily replied. "I love you too, Naomi."

---

"You have to tell her, Eff." Katie said, as they stood on the balcony smoking, snow falling around them.

Effy had just received a phone call, the phone call letting her know of her final hearing date with the FSA, which was in three days. She knew full well that those three days may be the last in which she has the chance to see her best friend before she dies.

"I know." Effy replied, taking a drag on her cigarette.

"Are you scared?"

"No. I'll survive somehow."

"But it's jail, Eff."

"Yeah." Effy replied.

"If you need some... You know...moral support... Let me know."

Effy smirked. "Why, Katie Fitch. Anyone would think you cared about me."

"Yeah well... Maybe that rock knocked some sense into me after all, yeah?"

Effy smiled. "Still the same Katie Fitch."

"Just older and sexier." Katie winked.

A short silence fell between them.

"What do you think they are talking about?"

"Hmm. Well, for once they might actually not be shagging." Katie laughed, although it wasn't quite funny.

Effy chuckled, before turning serious. "Do you think she'll make it? Emily, I mean."

Katie thought long and hard. "I really don't know. Her and Naomi... They fit, you know? They're like Emily and I use to be when we were kids. Two halves of the same whole. I hope she does, because I don't want to lose my sister as well... And I'll be there for her."

"You don't really hate Naomi, do you?"

Katie shook her head. "I never have, Eff. I was just protective of Emily. Naomi knows that."

"Hmm." Effy finished her cigarette and flicked the butt over the side of the balcony. "Think we'll ever find love like that?"

Katie laughed. "Who knows? Maybe there's some hot jailbird in your future."

"Funny." Effy replied.

Katie flicked her cigarette butt over the balcony. "C'mon, Eff. It's a shitty thing to have to do, but there's no time like the present." She said, placing a hand on Effy's shoulder. The taller brunette pulled Katie into a hug and Katie held on, knowing that it was something that Effy needed. She knew that Effy's focus had been Naomi and getting everyone here, but now, it was Effy who needed a little bit of solace in the storm of high emotions. Katie slipped back into her role as protector, and gave Effy the comfort she needed, even if only briefly.

The two of them went back into the warm corridor of the hospital, and began to walk back to Naomi's room. They stood outside, and Katie was surprised to see the two lying in Naomi's bed, cuddling and talking quietly while gazing out the window.

"Christ." Muttered Katie. "Nothing changes... They haven't seen each other in months, and Naomi's not got long left...and they're still as in love as they ever were." She said, as she watched the two of them. Naomi looked over at Katie and nodded for the two of them to come in, before gently kissing the top of Emily's head and saying something to her that neither Katie nor Effy could decipher.

Katie entered the room, with Effy following.

"How's the balcony?"

"Colder than this room, although for a hospital, I didn't think that was possible." Katie smirked. "You two okay?"

Emily and Naomi both looked at her with sad eyes.

"Making the best of a bad situation." Naomi said, quietly, still holding Emily close. Emily shifted and leaned up to kiss Naomi's cheek gently, before cuddling next to her protectively.

"I have something to say." Effy said.

"This ought to be good." Emily muttered.

"Em... It's ok. Just let her talk." Naomi said.

"Why? What could she possibly say that will make this better?"

"Nothing." Effy said. "I wish I could say something to make it better, but I can't. I wish things had been done differently, but they weren't, and you have every right to be angry at both Naomi and I for that, Emily."

"Too right I do."

"Em..."

"Okay, I'll let her speak..." Emily conceded, not wanting to argue with Naomi at all.

Effy took a deep breath. "I guess it's good... That the three of you are here. Obviously not because one of us is dying, because that's really going to fuck with Katie's Christmas list..." Effy began, a tiny smirk appearing on her lips. She caught Emily glaring at her, and gave her the best sympathetic look she could. "But because... Even though I've been a shitty friend to the three of you at times, I really do care about all of you. It amazes me every day that the four of us are still in contact."

"Is there a point to this?"

"Ems, just listen, yeah?" Katie said, and from the look on her face, Emily kept quiet, begrudgingly.

Effy bowed her head. "Naoms... You know the trouble at work?"

"Where you were shagging your way to success?" Naomi asked.

Emily huffed. "Nothing changes."

Effy nodded, but ignored Emily and continued. "Well, it's worse than I told you. You kept secrets from Emily and everyone... And I kept one, too. I told you I was being investigated by the FSA. I got a phone call today. I have a meeting with them in a few days, I'm probably going to be charged with insider trading."

Emily and Naomi just stared at Effy for a few moments, before Naomi spoke. "What the actual fuck, Eff? Insider trading?"

"Making money using inside informa-"

"She knows what it is, Effy. She's dying, not stupid." Emily snapped.

Naomi held her close to her and tried to keep her calm. "Em... Remember what I said?"

Emily sighed. "I'm sorry, Naoms. It's just hard." She muttered, before laying her head down on the pillow next to Naomi.

"Eff... How did you get yourself mixed up in that?"

"It all went tits up, I guess. I got in over my head, and now I have to pay the price." Effy explained the short version.

"What price would that be?" Emily said, dryly.

Effy shrugged. "I'm most likely going to prison."

"Jesus." Naomi said, quietly. The room was silent for a long time before anyone spoke again. Naomi rested her head against the pillows and shut her eyes.

"I know...there's a bit of this going around today..." Naomi said, quietly, a sense of exhausted anger creeping into her voice. "Why didn't you tell me? I'm your fucking best friend!" Her voice came a little louder now, and Emily rested her hand on her shoulder to calm her.

"How?! How was I meant to tell you? When you are asking me to look after Emily when you're gone... How do I tell a dying friend that I can't fulfil their dying wish?!" Effy snapped.

"Placate me. Anything." Naomi deadpanned. "Fuck it. My life is too short for arguing about your stupidity, Effy." She said, harshly.

Effy nodded. "You're right. But I had to tell you, in case you never saw me again, you know? I'm a shit friend sometimes, I admit that, but I couldn't let you die knowing I'd disappeared."

"Hallelujah, she admits it." Emily says.

Effy glared at Emily. "I could have tried to make Naomi call you herself yesterday, you know. But I didn't. I know you're angry at me right now, Emily, and if I were in your shoes, I'd be livid. I knew Naomi didn't have the strength to make that call, so I did it for her. I also called Katie, AND Gina, to break the news to her that her own daughter was dying. I didn't have to do that, but I did, you know why? Because I haven't been there for Naomi like I should have been, as a friend over these past months. She needed me then, and I wasn't there for her. Hell, even Dom was there for her when I wasn't."

"Wait, who is Dom?" Katie asked, interrupting.

Naomi smiled. "Dom is a lovely little fellow. And Effy is right, he's been there for me more than she has, and he doesn't even know me as well."

"Is he single?"

Emily rolled her eyes. "Katie!"

Katie smirked. "What? Just trying to lighten the mood..."

"So, I called everyone. Because Naomi wasn't in a position to. They were the WORST three phone calls I've ever had to make in my life, and I hope I never have to do it again." Effy said, the tears finally slipping from her eyelids. "I'm so sorry, to all of you. For being a shitty friend, for not knocking sense into Naomi and forcing her to call you all herself...months ago. I'm sorry that this is happening, I wouldn't wish it on anyone." She said, now sobbing and looking for a tissue.

Katie pulled one out of her pocket and handed it to Effy, and then pulled her into her arms for another crushing hug.

Naomi looked at Emily, who was surprised by what she was seeing in front of her. In fact, they all were, they'd never seen this kind of emotion pour out of Effy, and it was shocking to all three of them.

"Ems... Go on." Naomi said, whispering.

"What?"

Naomi flicked her eyes towards Katie and Effy. "Fitch hugs are the best, but I think she needs more than one." She said, looking back to Emily's red rimmed brown eyes. "Please... For me?"

Emily pursed her lips and nodded, standing up and moving towards both Katie and Effy. Katie opened up the embrace and Emily slid into it, and the three of them hugged each other tightly.

Naomi picked up Emily's phone that was lying on the bed. It had been sandwiched between the two of them, but now lay on the blanket. She switched to the camera function, and took aim, taking a snapshot of the three of them. She then turned the camera on herself, and mustering up the best smile she could, she took one last self portrait of, well, herself.

She smiled as she reviewed the pictures, knowing that Emily wouldn't see them until later. She placed the phone down and cleared her throat. "Anyone would think Effy was dying." She said, dryly.

Katie laughed as they all broke apart. "Attention seeker."

Naomi grinned. "You know it, Katiekins." She replied, as Emily came and climbed back into bed with her. The petite brunette kissed her cheek softly and cuddled against Naomi.

"I'm going to go for a bit." Effy said. "Give you two some space."

"Yeah, I'm going to see what passes for lunch in the cafeteria." Katie replied.

The two left, and Emily and Naomi were once more alone.

"Why did I have to hug her?" Emily asked.

"Because she needed it. And you can't be angry at her forever." Naomi said.

"Why on earth not?"

"I understand you are angry now, babe. But I've told you, it's not right that you should be angry with her. It's my fault, not hers."

"Ok."

"Ok?" Naomi queried.

"Well... No. But I don't want to argue about it, it's not worth it."

"Good." Naomi replied.

"How are you feeling?" Emily asked, gently brushing the thin hair off Naomi's forehead.

"After that revelation? Well..."

"No jokes, babe. Alright?"

Naomi nodded. "Not really much I can do about it, is there?"

"I guess not."

Naomi was silent for a few moments, as she thought to herself. "Em?"

"Yeah?"

"If she does go to prison... I want you to check on her."

Emily scoffed. "Why would I do that?"

Naomi sighed. "Emily... Stop it. Please." She said, wearily. "You would do that, because I'm asking you to. And you wouldn't deny me a request, not when..." She trailed off. "You know. Just do it for me, ok?"

Emily looked at Naomi. Finally, she sighed and nodded her head. Neither of them wanted to think about the end, at least, Emily didn't, she assumed it has been on Naomi's mind for a while now. Emily lay her head gently on Naomi's shoulder and felt her arms around her. She closed her eyes, and dozed off gently, Naomi's arms, sick or otherwise, being the perfect sedative for her tired body.

Naomi felt Emily's breathing change, and knew that she was asleep. She reached for Emily's phone again, and set the camera to take a video, and held her aching arm out from her, hitting record.

"Hey Ems. Surprise!" She said, quietly, with a smile. "I can't talk really loud, cuz you're sleeping next to me. I just wanted to tell you... That I love you, I've always loved you, I'm always going to love you. You've made my life a better experience, and I love you all the more for it. I wish I didn't have to leave you, but I want you to know I'll always be watching over you. You're the love of my life, Emily Fitch, and I will forever be yours. Be brave."

She kissed Emily's temple, and gave the camera a cheeky smirk before stopping the recording. She placed the phone down on the bedside table and closed her eyes, finally content that Emily was with her, where she knew she should have been all along.

---

EPILOGUE

Emily barely left Naomi's side, and was there by her side, six weeks later, when surrounded by Gina, Kieran and Katie, she took her final breaths.

Effy had been sentenced to five years in prison, and so missed the death of her best friend, but was allowed to attend the funeral.

Katie moved into Effy and Naomi's flat with Emily. Gina and Kieran went back to Bristol, but still visit the twins often, because she was more like a mother to them than their own had been, something Gina knew all too well.

Emily never returned to New York. She had her flatmate ship her belongings over, and explained to her boss the situation. He said that he was sorry to lose her, because she had such a great talent, but completely understood her reasons for not returning. She remained in London, getting a job at an entertainment magazine. She enjoyed it quite a lot, but there wasn't a day that went by that she didn't think of Naomi, the girl who had stolen her heart at age twelve. There were some times that she swore she could feel her presence, and knew that Naomi was watching her.

One day, About three months after Naomi's death, Emily was going through her phone, looking for one of the last shots she had taken in New York. It was then, that she saw three things she had never seen before. One was a photo of her, Katie and Effy hugging each other. She remembered back to that day, and then realised that Naomi must have taken it. The second picture almost made Emily drop her phone altogether. It was of Naomi, trying her best to not look like she was dying, a gentle smile on her face. She started at the picture, and felt a shiver, as seeing her face again, looking so happy, Emily felt as though Naomi was standing next to her.

The third thing, she realised, was a video clip. She felt the tears slipping, as she watched Naomi's message to her, and she wondered why she hadn't seen it until now. It was bittersweet, watching her, seeing her, hearing her speaking again after all this time.

"...be brave." Emily watched Naomi's final words to her, and then giggled slightly, noticing Naomi's cheeky grin at the end. She remembered that smirk and it was good to see it again. It was the first time since her death that she had been able to laugh.

Emily took a deep breath, stood up and walked to the window, fingering Naomi's gold ring that was hanging on a chain around her neck. She looked it into the night sky, and shut her eyesight feeling a few tears sliding out.

"Ok, Naoms... I'll try to be brave for you, like you were for me."

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A/N#2: Thanks for reading, if you got this far. While it is not completely perfect, I at least tried to add some of the characters who I believe should have been present (or at least mentioned) in Fire, as well as their reactions. The funny dialogue was in there because I actually felt like I had to cheer myself up a bit while writing it, and I don't deny that it was extremely emotional having to write this piece. It's not completely roll-on-the-floor funny, more cynicism and sarcasm, which is my main mode of humour, anyway.

Just when I think most of my anger about Fire has dissipated, it seems to come back... I think it's the only episode of television I've ever watched that I've been so split over, because even though the plot is just awful and sad (yeah, not getting over that in a hurry, and I unloaded to my best friend about it, who didn't completely understand but just let me talk about it), the acting and cinematography were something that I DO have praise for.

However, I don't think slick imagery and fabulous acting can make up for what was done, not for me. I stand by my opinion that it was bleak, cruel and hopeless, and the worst way to "celebrate" the characters we all know and love.

Cheers, and thanks for reading, review if you wish.