Friends With Benefits
A term used to describe the physical and emotional relationship between two people who may have a sexual relationship or a near-sexual relationship without necessarily demanding or expecting a more formal relationship as a goal
Fuckbuddies. That's what you call us. Not lovers, not a couple but fuckbuddies. Some people knew about us but most just thought that we we were close friends. If only they knew the truth abous us. That we were really sleeping together. Just sleeping together, there are no emotions involved. Well there's not supposed to be any feelings involved. But there are. We both know it. Both of us have admitted it. But then why are we here? It's because you don't want to be in a relationship. But why? Is it because you have feelings for someone else? Is it because you do not want to be categories as gay? Is it because you're scared? Well guess what? I'm scared too Roy. Scared of what people will think about me when they find out. But you're the person that keeps me going. You're the one that makes me think that I shouldn't care about what others think. Because I have you.
I wish that you could see the truth. That I'm the one that is in front of you. I'm the one that is going to be there when things turn bad, the one that is offering the shoulder to cry on. The one that isn't going to judge you when you do something wrong. I can't force you to be with me. I wouldn't do that anyways. It would only make you hate me and I wouldn't be able to live with that. But I also hate the thought of you being with someone else.
You have changed me. But for the better. I am a happier person whilst I am around you. I smile when people mention your name and I think about the next time that I am able to see you. I hate when I can't see you and it hurts like hell when I see you crying, knowing that I am not able to help you. All I can do is to confort you and hope that you will soon feel better. I am not always there when you are upset but you know that I am always on the other end of the phone. All you gotta do is pick up the phone and call me. I will always answer.
Things are difficult. I know that. We have both been through a lot lately but I am trying my best to help you. I just wish you would see that I could help you more. But I guess your heart lies somewhere else. And I will just h ave to live with that.
Just remember that I am always gonna be there for you. No matter what happens. I will always offer you a shoulder to cry on when you need it. Never forget that.
- Edward