Affair
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Author's Note: I got this idea from a Livejournal community, where you could write about these listed situations, and one of them was "Affair" and an idea popped into my head… and this is the result! I wrote this in one night, because I was that inspired. And since this is like a drabble thing, Yuki and Haru will be slightly OOC, considering they would never do such a not-so-nice thing.
Well, I hope you enjoy it, and please review! Thanks!
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Skin pressing to skin made the older boy let out a moan of pleasure. He felt so ecstatic, yet horrible at the same time. Kisses suddenly made their way up and down his throat and he closed his eyes. Almost immediately after, he felt his back hit the soft material of his bed sheets, the body of his only love pressing against him.
Then it came back; that horrible feeling that he hated to think about. It hit him like a brick and wouldn't go away like a disease.
"Haru, wait."
"What's wrong Yuki?"
Yuki gently pulled away from Haru and sat up in his bed. It was dark in the room, so Haru couldn't see the sad look on Yuki's face.
"This… this isn't right," he said, staring at the sheets of his bed. Haru got off his knees and sat down on the bed, trying to look at Yuki, despite the dark.
"What do you mean? What isn't right?"
"This relationship, Haru!" Yuki said angrily, tears suddenly springing to his eyes but refusing to fall. "You're engaged to Rin… we… we shouldn't be doing this!"
Haru stared at Yuki for the longest time, not moving an inch or speaking a single word. It actually started to make Yuki a little nervous. Finally, Haru let out a sigh and rested on his elbows.
"Yuki, I loved you since you told me I wasn't a dumb ox. You know that," he started off, his voice trying to hide his sadness. "But I thought you didn't love me back all those years... so I tried to move on. I dated Rin, and I won't lie to you, Yuki. I love her. But I love you so much more. So much."
Yuki turned around to look at whatever he could see of Haru in the dark.
"When you… when you finally told me how you felt, I was so happy," Haru continued, closing his eyes. "I had never been that happy before in my life. But I was already engaged to Rin…" Haru's voice suddenly started to get deeper, angrier. "Why Yuki? Why did you have to tell me when it was too late? You said you loved me for such a long time but why didn't you tell me earlier?"
"I didn't have the courage to," Yuki whispered, lying down on his side next to Haru. He put his right hand against Haru's tear stained cheek. "And you were dating Rin… I didn't know if you still loved me. I know I should have been truthful to you from the beginning."
There was a pause where the two boys just laid there, their breathing being the only noise in the room. The air felt tense, almost, like they were in a horror book, and neither boy liked that feeling.
"It's just… I feel so horrible doing this. I really do. I try not to think about what we're doing, but it just never goes away," Haru suddenly whispered, closing his eyes again. "I don't have enough heart and courage to break it off with Rin… especially now."
"I feel horrible, too, Haru," Yuki said, pulling him into a hug. Haru welcomed the embrace, putting his head under Yuki's chin while trying to get as close to Yuki's body as he could. "I didn't want this to happen but I just couldn't keep what I felt to myself. I felt like it was killing me on the inside if I just kept quiet."
"But… we really should tell her about this soon. She deserves to know and we deserve to have a clear conscience," the older boy continued, kissing the top of Haru's head. Haru nodded tiredly, closing his eyes, trying to clear his mind. However, the thoughts of cheating on Rin wouldn't leave his head. He felt horrible for lying to her all the time, saying he was going out with some friends or that he was going to the store, just so he could spend as much time as he could with Yuki. Haru should have been honest with her from the beginning. He should have broken it off with her when Yuki finally told him how he felt. It was just that he felt too bad to say anything to Rin, not wanting to upset her. Though, that would have been the best thing to do for her. Haru only made it worse by starting his relationship with Yuki.
And although he didn't at all regret being with Yuki, he surely regretted what the relationship caused.
Yuki's voice interrupted Haru's thoughts, which he was thankful for, giving him a reason to stop thinking about their problem for even just a few seconds.
"Let's just get some sleep for now, ok?"
With that, the two boys started to finally fall asleep, hoping that for just even a few hours they could forget the trouble they have caused.
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Fin
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Author's Note: Short, a little bittersweet and to the point about how much Haru regretted cheating on Rin but didn't regret being with Yuki, pretty much. I hope it doesn't seem so rushed. I'd make this a lot longer but it was meant to be a short one-shot…. Though, if you all feel that I should continue it, I just might. :)
But thanks for reading!