DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN BTVS OR KING ARTHUR
A/N: I changed the timeline of BTVS for creative license purposes so that the whole fiasco with 'The First' happened before the debacle with 'Glory'. Basically, Dawn is now 21 (I know, I know), and the only remaining members of the Scooby Gang are Buffy and Xander. I know it doesn't match up but for the purposes of my story, so be it.
Chapter One: You've got to be kidding me…
"Live. For me." She whispered reverently against my cheek allowing me to feel her warm breath puff across my chilled skin as she placed a lingering kiss on my forehead. I watched in awed horror as she whipped away from me, the vanilla scent of her hair wafting to my senses as time seemed to slow down and the pain pounding from my scars began to numb me.
This wasn't my world and this was not my life but it was in the instant that I saw her turning towards her death that I knew this was my responsibility along with my choice. For a girl who had been thrust into an existence that wasn't true at the age of thirteen, I had seen too much reality for my liking. I had seen death, touched desperation, tasted the deepness of sadness, and heard the sobs and cries that seemed to lately surround me. I couldn't ask Buffy to give up her life for something that wasn't even meant to be on this soil in the first place.
Time caught up to me in a swoop that almost had me reeling backwards before I pushed as hard and as fast ahead as I could, catching the back of Buffy's sweater and using my remaining strength I hurled her back to the grated tower while whispering softly,
"I'm sorry."
Not hesitating to see if I had stopped her, I took her place on the path towards the end of the portal and closed my eyes before jumping off with my arms spread wide open as if to accept what was about to be given to me.
"DAWN!" I heard Buffy scream from above me and I could hear the tears in her eyes as she continued on screaming my name in complete terror.
The pain that hit me rivaled any emotional pain I had been put through in my years on this Earth and I let loose an animalistic scream of torture as the portal continued to tear and rip everything away from me until the world around me fizzled to black.
465 A.D., Britain
It was the sound of a hawk crying over head penetrating into my dream that had me groaning and slowly opening my eyes. The air around me was colder than what I remembered causing my entire form to begin shaking when I realized this. Sun was filtering through the trees over head allowing me to see that I was lying in the middle of a forest. Sounds of birds chirping and movements from the critters inside it were all that accompanied me besides my now heavy breathing.
Lifting my head slowly, I clutched my stomach where the three long cuts laid and hissed in pain when my fingers touched the exposed and sensitive skin of the wounds. I had no idea where I was or what had happened while I was in the portal but I knew something was different about where I was now seated.
"Buffy…" I whispered sadly and was able to hold back the tears even though it burned more than I would have liked.
When I finally managed to stand with the aid of a nearby tree, I about toppled back over again from the intense pain that flashed through my body. The hawk ahead continued on crying and just as I was about to take a few cautious steps forward, the ground beneath me began to rumble and the sound of horses filled my ears.
"Horses?" I asked myself bewildered and began to look around wildly for a place to hide but wasn't quick enough as riders crashed through the woods in front of me before pulling their horses' reigns and reeling them back in.
This entire act took me by such complete surprise that I did end up toppling back onto the ground with wide eyes as the men upon the horses looked at me in confusion.
"A woman is the cause of our chase?" A bald and stout looking man asked almost amusedly while lowering his sword.
I looked up at the different looking men and spoke to the group as a whole slowly asking,
"I was wondering if you could tell me where I am, what year it is, and or possibly if I'm even on Earth anymore."
A younger looking man with brown hair, dazzling green eyes, and full beard leaned across his mare and continued on staring at me in distrust while speaking with,
"Arthur, the bright light and loud noise…she's a witch and has already begun speaking in riddles!"
I looked at him slightly offended while picking myself up from the floor just as the man he had spoken to looked straight down at me with such intense green eyes I felt as if I couldn't hold back any information if he asked. He had loose black hair and a square jaw but what was most intriguing about the man was an air of authority and respect he seemed to generate while he looked down at me kindly but cautiously.
"My lady, what's your business here so close to…?" He began but stopped when he saw my eyes widen immediately when they caught sight of the sword being gripped in his hands just before I let my sight wander back up to his.
"King Arthur?" I asked breathlessly and almost nervously.
A couple of the men laughed at this and even the man I was questioning grinned slightly before shaking his head and telling me calmly,
"I'm King of no man my Lady, but I am called Arthur."
The strain of my body and shock of knowing when and where I was took its toll immediately and in response to his answer, I passed out.
The feel of warm strong arms surrounding me and the slight bumps causing me to jar against an armored donned chest had me groaning and groggily opening my eyes.
"Ah, and she awakes." A teasing male voice said against my head.
Shocked, I craned my head around and became completely trapped in the most intensely deep brown eyes I'd ever seen; they were like molten chocolate.
"Who are you?" I whispered as he just smirked down at me while the bald and stout one rode up easily towards us.
"Lancelot, now would you, beautiful lady, grace us with your name?"
I only caught the first word of his answer and for the second time that day my eyes widened as I tried to wriggle free of his hold to turn fully and face him but he simply and easily tightened his grip on me.
"Lancelot? You're thee Sir Lancelot?" I asked completely taken aback.
He just grinned broader and said arrogantly,
"I see that my legends far advance my presence."
Before I could reply, the stout one now riding next to us chortled and cut in with,
"Yeah and it's yer legends, Sir Knight, that 'ave fair maidens runnin' when yer presence shows its ugly head."
Without missing a beat, Lancelot raised an eyebrow and replied,
"It's the running that excites them my dear friend, ask Vanora as the next time she runs into my arms."
The man glared at him before trotting off forward as another deep laugh filled the air now beside us again. Turning to see who it was now, I was taken by surprise by how ruggedly handsome all these men were; all were men's men. The one who had taken up the vacant spot had long blonde hair braided in some areas, full facial hair, but intense sea green eyes that had my cheeks coloring a bit under their gaze.
"I do believe you've forgotten to give us a name my Lady." He teased and I noticed Lancelot almost imperceptibly tighten his arms around me.
Smiling shyly, I looked straight ahead so I didn't have to stare at just one man and whispered,
"Dawn."
I could feel both their gazes on me but Lancelot spoke first softly with,
"A beautiful name for a beautiful woman…tis fitting."
I just smirked right as the company of Knights all stopped and it was then that I realized it had been getting darker and darker by the minute as well as colder.
"We make camp here for the night…Tristan." Arthur said sternly and I watched as a wild looking man with plaited hair covering his face took off into the night and a familiar cry of a hawk accompanied him.
"Come, you must be freezing in that shift." Lancelot said while dismounting.
I was surprised at the chivalry as he placed his hands on my hips and literally picked me up off the horse and set me back down onto the ground before unloading his weapons and gear from his mare.
"Dawn." A voice spoke from behind me.
Whirling around, I saw the man with the long blonde hair standing before me with his hand outstretched holding a thick blue looking blanket with a small smile on his face.
"I always pack a spare." He explained to me.
Smiling gratefully up at him, I put the cloak on, when I figured out what it was, with his assistance as my stomach was still painfully throbbing from the wounds.
"Thank you." I told him while wrapping it tightly around me and unconsciously inhaling the scent that clung to the cloth. He smiled both at my words and actions before striding off towards another man unloading his own horse.
I walked towards where I saw Arthur patting down his horse and cleared my throat when I was behind him…not surprised when he didn't start at my presence knowing he probably already sensed I was there.
"Thank you for um…taking care of me today." I told him hesitantly, not quite knowing what to do in a situation like this.
"It's no matter needing gratitude my Lady, however if you will allow it, Dagonet will see to your wounds."
Chapter Two: How the Past is marring our skin…
I clung tighter to my cloak when I realized that the scars the doc had given me must have been spotted earlier this afternoon while in the forest. I had hoped that no one had seen them and I would be allowed to clean them in peace and reflect on the events that led up to them.
"Yeah, sure, that'd be fine." I replied with a shaky nod, not wanting to come across as rude. I sat down, as instructed by Arthur, next to the fire that had already been built and after a few moments a giant of a man came and squatted down beside me. He had a long scar down the left side of his face and a gentle fierceness about him that seemed to surprisingly put me at ease. While he fished out bottles and balms of oils from a leather pouch, I asked quietly,
"You're Dagonet?"
He looked up quickly and then back down at his work but long enough for me to see the kindness in his soft blue eyes just as he replied in a gruff voice,
"Yes my Lady."
"Dawn." I corrected him almost instantly.
He looked up once more curiously, holding my gaze as I told him with a small smile,
"My name's Dawn, no 'my Lady' in front of it."
His face seemed to relax some and I saw the corners of his mouth curve into a small grin before he ducked his head to begin his work.
"Where are your wounds?" He asked, obviously all business now.
Taking in a calming breath, I moved aside the cloak and the slashes across my stomach were now clearly visible to his gaze. I watched as his eyebrows furrowed together just while he brought up one finger and ghosted them across the wounds asking me softly and almost angrily,
"Who gave you these?"
"A man…if you can even call him that." I told him with my anger now matching his.
He looked up at me and I saw sympathy in his eyes making me turn mine away quickly just as he inquired,
"Why would he do such a thing?"
Shrugging my shoulders and looking out into the night I told him as nonchalantly as possible,
"He wanted something of mine, something I wasn't going to give him."
"Did he attain it?"
I slowly turned my eyes towards his so he could see the burning anger in my eyes before hissing between clenched teeth,
"Yes."
An understanding seemed to pass through us for a few more seconds just as he began applying all different assortments of ointments, me cheering for myself as I was able to hold in every hiss and moan of pain as they touched raw and bloodied skin. He worked quietly and I found the silence to be a comfortable lull while I continued on looking around the large expanse of land and trees by us. When Dagonet finished, he surprised me and even a few of the Knights who had been watching quietly by placing a fatherly kiss on my forehead before heading towards his own horse to unpack.
I walked over towards where the man who had given me his cloak was sitting and joined him on the log while he continued to sharpen his sword with the younger Knight who shifted further away from me suspiciously and became pre-occupied cleaning his sword leaving just me and the kind man.
"Are you hungry my Lady?" He asked politely to which I smirked and told him,
"Just call me Dawn, all this Lady business is giving me the wiggins."
He murmured this word, 'wiggins' to himself while it seemed like Galahad was storing it in his head for further proof that I was a witch of some sort.
"And yes, I'm starving." I said to finally break the silence.
It felt like fifteen minutes later after I had been given the men's names and everyone was now gathered around the fire eating, drinking, and laughing save for the wild looking man, Tristan, who had yet to make his reappearance. I didn't say much, trying to blend further in until Bors called out,
"You married Lass?"
All eyes turned to me and I was thankful that it was too cold for me to muster up the heat to blush under the intense stares of many handsome men. Swallowing my piece of food I told him with a laugh,
"No, I'm not married."
A few of the men raised their eyebrows at this as Lancelot asked with a small smirk,
"Then plenty of suitors I'm sure."
Smiling I shook my head and told the group,
"No, no suitors either."
"Why the bloody hell not?" Bors asked now completely confused.
"I think I'm a little bit too young to be thinking about marriage." As I said this I noticed Dagonet seemed to approve in a slight nod of his head.
"How old are you?" Gawain asked me softly.
"Twenty-One."
The men all sputtered at this and Bors shot out without thinking,
"You better get a move on it, pretty soon you'll be a barren old cow!"
While I laughed at this, Dagonet smacked Bors upside the head but he was too busy enjoying my reaction to his bluntness.
"Are you married then?" I asked with a playful haughty eyebrow raised.
He looked horrified at this and shook his head while taking another swig of his drink answered,
"No, I've got my Vanora and all our bastards, don't need to go ruining a good thing."
I tried to get over my shock of hearing him call his children 'bastards' but I guess in this time it wasn't uncommon…I hoped.
"How many kids do you have?" I asked tearing off another piece of the meat.
"Ten." The entire group answered for him.
My eyes widened impossibly large and without thinking about protocol I spoke aloud with,
"You mean after the fifth she still had sex with you?"
All the men once again coughed and spluttered at my statement but Bors simply threw his head back and laughed while slapping his knee stating happily with,
"Knew I would like you Lass."
Arthur was grinning at the scene before asking,
"Well with no husband surely your family must be worrying for you?"
Ducking my eyes downward I said so softly that they all had to lean forward,
"Only my older sister and good friend."
There was a silence and since I hadn't looked up yet I missed the exchange of looks the men had before Galahad, surprisingly, was the one to ask,
"What about your mother or father?"
"My mother died a few years ago and my father…I haven't seen him since I was eight."
Lancelot took the initiative and asked the question on everyone's mind,
"How far away is your homeland?"
Snorting, I shook my head and said longingly,
"Feels like it's thousands of worlds away from here."
I noticed a new demeanor fold over the group as Galahad spoke up with,
"We understand the sentiment."
I was surprised when Arthur politely excused himself and rose only to walk away from the group quietly but my curiousness of what had been said overruled anything else. Looking at the group of men I asked quickly,
"You mean you're not from here?"
I looked directly at Lancelot and saw him shake his head before beginning to sharpen his dual swords.
"If you don't like it here, why don't you just go back home?" I asked innocently.
"We have two years left on this blasted island." Bors said angrily while ripping into his meat once more.
I put the facts together and asked,
"Is this some sort of service Army thing?"
They all laughed humorlessly except for Dagonet who had remained silent throughout the whole discussion.
"Bloody Romans." Galahad all but growled while now beginning to sharpen a few arrow tips.
"Where are you all from then?"
It was Gawain who answered me with a quiet and almost reverent,
"Sarmatia."
The men seemed to soak up all this name gave them and I even saw Galahad close his eyes and breathe in deeply. I was given a small history lesson on what had happened to put the Knights where they are now and when he finished the men seemed to be even angrier. Not quite willing to open up about my own past, I stood from the group drawing their attention and said quietly with words that didn't feel like my own,
"Getting a weight from life is something we all have to expect. But to bear it with such diligence and bravery puts you far above the common man. Goodnight."
I turned and walked away from the group, missing the dumbstruck looks I had put on all their faces with my words.
Chapter Three: A Voice in the Dark…
"DAWN!" I could hear Buffy's scream reverberating throughout my head, I could practically feel her tears running down my face as if they were my own.
I looked on as she collapsed down in the rubble where my body ended up, a dazed look in her eyes while Xander stood speechless behind her with his own tears running freely down his face. Buffy threw herself atop my lifeless body and clutched me to herself so forcefully I could faintly feel her arms wrapped around me from where I stood. Her sobs echoed in the silence while her tears matted her hair with Xander finally collapsing beside her with an emptiness filling his face.
"DAWN!" She sobbed in agony with her shoulders and body shaking and her arms holding me so tightly that I heard a few of my ribs snap.
I awoke with a start and could feel the world around me spinning making me gasp and stand, clutching to a nearby tree as I ran and stumbled towards the edge of our camp and emptied the contents of my stomach with tears streaming down my face.
"Oh God…" I whispered while I sat back up with sweat peppering my skin and my silent sobs wracking my body.
"What ails you my Lady?" A voice spoke quietly behind me.
Gasping again, I whirled around and saw Arthur standing behind me with concern covering his handsome features.
"Bad dream." I whispered breathlessly, knowing how pale my face must be at this moment.
I knew he didn't believe me but he let it slide anyways and came to crouch down beside me, looking out into the night sky. I recognize the brooding look on his face because of seeing Angel doing it continually while in town but this time I knew exactly what he was upset about.
"You can't blame yourself for what happened to your men." I whispered and heard his head whip towards me but I was still staring off into the distance.
"I don't believe you've been educated on the subject to speak so freely about it my Lady." He told me as politely, however stiffly, as he could.
Smiling and finally turning to meet his eyes I said,
"You don't have to know the story to understand the pain."
He was silent once more but before he could respond I continued with,
"Your men fight, sweat, bleed, and die for your Arthur. Their loyalty goes beyond common trust and allegiance…that's more than most leaders will ever hope for."
He looked down at me with wide eyes and a slightly parted mouth but I just smiled and finally decided to let some bit of myself out with,
"My sister, when she was fifteen or so was chosen by a group of men to fight for them. The things she's faced and destroyed are more than you'll ever be able to comprehend but she continues to do it even when all those she loves die around her. And she will continue to do it until she herself dies."
"What type of 'men' would ask such a thing of a woman?" He asked angrily but I decided not to answer his question and continued with,
"You aren't alone in this; your men don't go to battle with just swords, bows, and axes. They go with you leading them, because their devotion and dedication to you extends beyond just weapons and the fear of death. Take heart in that you have six men who would willingly sacrifice themselves for you without question, this will be the only thing that will get you through what's ahead. It's the only thing that got my sister through."
We both stood at the same time but before I could turn, he took my hand softly and told me sincerely,
"You've given me a moment's peace my Lady, I thank you for it."
Smiling, I stepped up on my toes and kissed his cheek replying,
"Don't need to thank me, I'll see you in the morning."
I was fully aware that he was watching and making sure that I was safely settled down for sleep once more along with the fact that more than one set of ears had listened and taken in the advice I had given Arthur that night.
The next morning I awoke surprisingly warm considering the temperature and island but looked down to see three spare cloaks covering my form while the men around me began to pack up the camp and prepare their horses. I returned a cloak each to Lancelot, Gawain, and Dagonet with a soft kiss on the cheek much to their amusement before I heard Bors' voice with the familiar question from last night,
"Are ye hungry lass?" He asked while sitting comfortably down on a log after having finished what he needed to get done, waiting anxiously to get back on his horse and ride. Smiling at him, I shook my head and was about to ask if there was anything I could do when a silvering glimmer above caught my attention but it was when I recognized what it was that I took in a gasp at the same time the Knights around me tensed in attention, obviously hearing or sensing something was off.
The arrow was released in the unknowing direction I was running to but before it could hit its mark, I crash-tackled Galahad to the floor making him grunt in surprise and annoyance while he made sure the sword he had just drawn didn't make contact with any part of me.
An arrow sailing from our side sunk straight into the shooter and I heard a yelp of pain before craning my head around from my place atop Galahad to see the wild man, Tristan, riding in effortlessly on his mare while lowering his bow.
"Would you kindly get off of me?" Galahad asked angrily, obviously wounded that he had been taken to the ground by a woman. Glaring down at him, I stuck a finger in his chest and said in an angrily mocking tone,
"Oh, of course you're welcome for saving your life Galahad, it was no sweat at all!"
A few of the men laughed behind me while I overheard Tristan say in an interestingly accented voice,
"Scout. There'll be more by nightfall."
"Then we move quickly." Arthur told him and turned, telling the rest of us the same while as Galahad still was on his back with me sitting atop of him, both of us glaring at each other.
"You act like you rather would have been shot by the arrow than saved by a girl." I said with narrowed eyes making him prop himself up on his elbows so I was now practically straddling him as he unconsciously bent his right leg so I was able to rest my body against it while I sat as to not hurt my stomach any more than needed.
"Saved? You hardly saved me, you threw me to the ground and nearly broke my nose!" He shot back making me reply calmly,
"Better your nose than your groin."
His eyes widened some at that but he still maintained his glare and it was when we heard a few of the Knights chuckling that we both looked away from each other with flushed faces and heavy breathing from unleashed anger.
"As comfortable as you two appear to be, we need to begin moving." Lancelot said with a knowing smirk and raise of his eyebrows.
Confused, we both looked back at each other and realized for the first time that my hands were pressed against his firm chest, my body weight held up against his right thigh, and his left hand was settled comfortably on my hip while I straddled him. Almost as one we both jumped away from each other with heated faces both from anger and something indefinable. He stalked away towards his horse mumbling underneath his breath before sheathing his sword and beginning to prepare his animal for the ride ahead.
I pulled Gawain's cloak tighter about my shoulders and looked up not knowing who I was to be riding with until all the men were mounted and Tristan took off leaving me looking at each men.
"Seeing as how you and Galahad are far more acquainted with each other than the rest of us, perhaps you should ride with him for the day?" Lancelot suggested with a smirk and took off following Arthur who couldn't stop the smile that began curling at the corner of his lips.
Gawain and Bors laughed and took off as well with shaking heads before Dagonet came forward with a kind smile and offered me his hand that I gratefully took to allow him to pull me up on his horse in front of him.
"Thanks." I whispered with a relieved sigh but he just took hold of the reigns in front of me and kicked the horse into a run with Galahad shooting off in front of us, obviously still as upset as I was about the situation that previously occurred.
The ride, however beautiful, was causing my entire lower body to become numbly sore but deciding not to voice my complains, I steadily eased myself to lean against Dagonet's chest to which he simply tightened his hold on me so I didn't fall. I had no idea where we were going and instead just watched the passing scenery with the early morning slowly going from afternoon into early dusk with the sky tinged a bit pink.
The horses were slowed for a walk and the men grouped back together with Arthur and Tristan in the front and the rest of us in pairs behind them.
"Change of mind in your preferred riding partner Dawn?" Lancelot asked beside me making me turn my head and glare at him retorting,
"No, I thought I'd give you the favor of riding with him instead good Knight, seeing as how you talk about it more than occasionally."
The Knights around me laughed at me reply and even Lancelot appeared shocked for a moment while Galahad threw more nasty looks in my direction much to my amusement.
"Your sharp tongue is as appealing as your beauty my Lady." He replied softly with a seductive tone in his voice and smirk on his face.
"I wish I could say the same for you Lancelot." I said just as quickly making Bors laugh once more and tell me with a pat to my knee,
"I knew I would like you lass."
"You already said that." I told him dryly but with a soft smile on my face.
Before any more witty banter could be given, war cries from beside us in the distance were heard making all Knights snap to attention while Tristan yelled over towards us,
"Woads!"
Confused, I looked over and was shocked to see blue people running towards us while waving their weapons around angrily.
"What's with the smurfs?" I asked but didn't receive an answer as Dagonet set me down gently but told me firmly,
"Stay here."
I watched with an open mouth as the Knights rode off into the battle, all unsheathing their own weapons while I stood there having no idea what to do but to pick up a fallen piece of branch just in case; the wood in my hand giving me a familiar sense of comfort.
Awe covered my features as I saw the Knights fight efficiently and deadly against the 'woads' but a few began to slip by them and head my way making my eyes widen in panic and brace myself for the onslaught. I caught a glimpse of Galahad rapidly shooting arrows with perfect precision, Bors brutally beating the enemy to a pulp, Lancelot severing heads left and right with his twin blades, Dagonet fearlessly engaging them before striking them down, Gawain using his axe and sword as brutally as Lancelot however less gracefully. Arthur and Tristan were both a sight to behold, one wielding Excalibur and the other a curved sword in such a manner that it felt like I was watching a movie with the excellent swordsmanship rather than standing at the edge of the fight.
I was however pulled from my dreams when a loud roar sounded in front of me and I ducked away before there was a chance to pull me from the ground. The man angrily came upon me once more but I kicked his feet out from underneath him so he landed next to me on his back and raised my foot as high as I could before bringing it down violently on his chest, knocking the wind out of him.
"Ow!" I hissed when my wounds began to tear once more.
Looking up, I saw a few of the Knights running towards me as the dead bodies laid in their wake, but before they could come another Woad rushed me and sent us both rolling down the hill and into a nearby stream not deep enough to be dunked under but cold enough to send chills racing down my spine. Grabbing hold of the hilt of the sword that came down on me, I kneed the man in the solar plexus and as he bent over I grabbed his head and slammed it on my still upraised knee before taking his sword as my own only to swing it up to deflect the strike of another oncoming aggressor.
"Asshole!" I grunted at him when he managed to slice at my arm.
Knowing I'd be unable to take a human life, I twirled around him and kicked his back so he went sprawling into the stream himself before bringing the sword once up again over my head as the first man who attacked me tried to swing at me from behind.
"Et tu Brutus?" I said with a snarl before shoving his sword back up and around and delivered a spinning kick that sent him twirling to the ground.
Before anything else could happen three arrows were shot briskly and became imbedded in each of the three men's bodies until they lay still around me. Looking up, I was surprised to see Galahad lower his bow while Dagonet and Gawain came up behind him holding their sword in case of another fight.
"Thank you." I whispered to Galahad with wide eyes but he just nodded his head and walked away while the other two helped me out of the stream as I was now drenched and shivering with my hair coming down in wet strings. We walked over towards where the Knights were now regrouping or killing remaining Woads and cleaning off their swords.
"Are you hurt?" Arthur asked concerned but I just smiled and shook my head replying,
"Nope, thanks to Galahad I'm still alive and kicking."
My terminology was foreign but they understood the enthusiasm it behind just as Galahad replied while putting his arrows away,
"She seemed to have things well at hand long before I arrived."
Eyebrows were raised in my direction but I just shrugged meekly and replied,
"My sister taught me a few things."
The conversation was dropped there and while Dagonet tended to our few minor wounds I looked around and felt my stomach roll at all the blood and bodies surrounding our little area.
"Who were they?" I asked Dagonet in a tiny whisper making him look up at him in confusion as I more than likely should have known this already.
"Woads, British mutineers." He told me while bandaging my arm tightly.
I looked down and was shocked to see not just men but women among the corpses and instantly I turned away so I didn't have to see anymore. Dead demons and vampires were one thing, but seeing a mutilated human body was something I wasn't frequently exposed to during my time in Sunnydale.
When I was finished and Bors was pulled forward I walked a ways away towards the forest as I heard a slight whisper of my name calling me forward. Everything around me seemed to become hazy and time itself seemed to become so slow it was beginning to lull me to sleep. The voice that was speaking tugged on a piece inside of me and I felt beyond compelled to move forward and answer the call when a strong grip on my upper arm had everything came sliding back into focus so fast I felt as if I was going to fall over. Looking up sharply to see who had stopped me, I was surprised to find Tristan staring intently down upon me with a dangerous look in his eye.
"Don't wander from camp." He told me gruffly while letting his eyes trace through the forest as if he was easily looking through the dense covering with his sharp eyes.
"What was it?" I finally asked him, knowing he must have heard it too or else he wouldn't have stopped me so suddenly.
He stared down into my searching eyes for a moment before releasing me and striding back into the forest with a hawk circling over head.
Chapter Four: Blood of the Land…
I was lying on my back later that night, staring up aimlessly into the star-speckled sky when another form dropped beside me, staring ahead with me and not saying a word until I turned and saw Arthur crouched beside me.
"Earlier today you mentioned your sister training you, I remember you stating as well to me that you were unable to recall much of anything."
Sighing and sitting up before turning to face him I told him as carefully as I could,
"I remember my life before here Arthur…I remember."
He stared at me quietly as I breathed the last words in sadness before asking,
"And you're certain you have no family that is worried after you?"
Smiling sadly and looking up towards him I shook my head replying while standing to my feet,
"No, I don't."
I gave him one last good-bye before trudging my way over towards where the fire was burning happily sitting as close to it as safety allowed while pulling Gawain's cloak tighter around my shoulders; Sunnydale was never this cold.
"Here." A voice said softly.
Looking up I smiled at Lancelot who was handing me a piece of bread and cheese while taking a seat beside me himself, leaning back on his haunches.
"Thanks."
He just looked over at me curiously asking,
"Your sister…she trained you to fight?"
A few of the Knights around us looked up in curiosity while I made a face at the unfamiliar food that traveled through my mouth and down my throat. Turning towards him and becoming locked in his intense stare I nodded my head and replied,
"Yeah, she taught me a few moves."
Galahad simply chortled at this and asked dubiously,
"A woman fighting and passing along her knowledge to her sister?"
Narrowing my eyes at him I inquired through clenched teeth,
"Is that amusing to you?"
He raised his eyebrows in surprise at my reaction but before anything else could be said Bors cut in with a slurred voice of,
"No amusement lass, just surprise is all."
"What? You think women can't fight? That all we're meant to do is just sit around and look pretty while you big men go off and protect us?"
My anger was rising, I knew, but I wasn't able to hold back my temper feeling defensiveness coming in not only for Buffy but on my behalf as well; the sacrifice I made for that world was something none of these men would comprehend.
"He didn't mean to offend you Dawn." Lancelot said softly trying to ease me by putting a calming hand on my shoulder but I shrugged it off gently and stood angrily staring at Galahad all but spitting out,
"Let me tell you something about my sister…she is the bravest person I've ever known and will ever know. She's stronger than any man, more self-sacrificing than any person, and has more courage than anything you will ever come across!"
"Do you have any idea what men you're talking to girl?" Galahad asked standing up himself with anger pouring out of his entire form…almost enough to match my own.
"Galahad." Gawain began to say warningly but he shook it off and continued on with,
"I've fought beside brothers and friends who've shed their lives for this foreign land, countless have been struck down until our numbers have dwindled to what you see before you're very naïve eyes. Do not talk to us of strength, sacrifice, and courage until you've witnessed what we've witnessed and will continue to until our death on this soil or our freedom through a bloody piece of parchment!"
The men were staring at the two of us with wide eyes and unknown to us Arthur and Tristan had been standing on the outskirts of the fire listening with attentiveness while my form trembled. I finally looked away and strode silently from the group not wanting any of them to see the tears now flowing from my eyes and down my cheeks. I caught hold of myself around a tree and stood there with my shoulders shaking from unrepressed sobs while the pain and loneliness I had been trying to push aside seemed to hit me harder than I thought possible.
"Child…" A voice whispered from the distance making me snap my head upwards in shock and look around wildly with wide eyes.
The breeze around me picked up causing my breathing to increase rapidly as my hair was blown across my face and the hood of the cloak I had pulled up was whipped back down across my back.
"Who's there?" I whispered hesitantly, automatically searching for a stake before remembering where I was.
"Fear me not, I mean you no harm…" The voice once again seemed to waft around me and I felt myself begin to calm at the feelings this strange but oddly familiar voice was invoking.
The snapping of a twig behind me and clearing of the throat had me yelping and whirling around only to see the form of Galahad before me eyeing me hesitantly and the trees I had been turned to. He looked back towards me and for a full half of a minute we were silent, just staring at each other until he finally broke and took a step forward saying unconvincingly,
"I came here to apologize."
Raising an eyebrow in disbelief and slight amusement I asked him sharply,
"Is that so?"
I could see his jaw tighten some along with his fists now at his sides before he seemed to steel himself and say to me,
"What I said was offensive and disrespectful, I offer you my apologies."
Staring at him, I walked past him while telling him simply,
"I don't accept."
He whirled around and asked incredulously,
"What?"
Before I could continue on he took hold of my wrist and warmness flowed through me along with the shock at his stronger and larger hand enveloping my wrist…his skin against mine. Turning towards him he seemed to be having a multitude of feelings as well before he finally closed his face up while I told him slightly breathlessly,
"When you mean it, I'll forgive you."
"There's nothing to forgive!" He cried out angrily while releasing my wrist making me feel suddenly unbearably cold.
"Then why are you apologizing?"
We continued staring at each other for a few more seconds until I finally said with a sigh,
"Fine, I'll forgive you if you'll do the same for me."
"What for?" He asked genuinely confused.
"I shouldn't have said those things to you, you were right. I have no clue what you've been through and what you've seen, I shouldn't have jumped down your throat like that."
He looked at me confused and slightly wary from my term of phrasing but slowly nodded his head replying,
"I accept."
Smiling softly, I turned away and began walking back towards camp. Before I turned around the bend, I threw a look over my shoulder and was surprised to be pleasantly surprised when I saw he was watching me walk away with a softer look in his eyes than what I was used to from him.
I was pleased to note that the men were smart enough to act as if nothing had ever happened before I left and instead I allowed myself to curl up a few feet away from Dagonet, liking the gentle feeling that came across from him and needing some type of paternal comfort that I came to associate him with.
Blood…there was so much blood that the ground I walked on squished beneath my bare feet. Bodies hung from the ceilings all from the hallway I walked under with blank eyes staring down at me and watching the moves I made.
"Buffy!" I cried out holding onto my arm that was oozing blood from the wound given to me.
I could hear screams coming from the doors lining the hall and could practically taste the blood it was so thick in the air. Stumbling against the ground and stabling myself using the wall, I looked down to see that it was a severed hand I had tripped on. Now running down the hallway I opened the door marked with a bloodied 'X' and stopped with wide eyes upon seeing a familiar face plunging a knife into Buffy's stomach.
"NO!" I screamed watching as Buffy's flailing body suddenly went limp as her lifeless eyes remained trained on me.
The murderer slowly turned around and I cried out in horror before stumbling onto my behind on the cold and wet ground when I saw my own eyes glinting behind the cloak while holding up the dripping sword.
I sat straight up with sweat running across my skin while I shook in horror at what I had just seen. The night was silent around me, so silent that I could practically hear the trees swaying back and fourth. Afraid that my heavy breathing would easily alert the men around me, I stood up as silently as I could and walked towards where the dying embers of our previous fire now where. Standing in front of them I was in a complete daze trying to clean my head from I had seen just as an accented voice spoke from behind me with,
"You should be resting."
It caught me so off guard that I swung around and was about to deliver a punishing uppercut to the man's jaw before my hand was grasped in mid-air in a stronger grip than my own.
"You scared me." I explained to the silent scout who was now eyeing me with a still disinterested look across his face.
He simply released my hand before tossing what looked like meat bones into the winking fire.
"The other night, you heard what I heard didn't you?" I finally asked him, keeping my eyes trained on his face not caring that he wasn't giving me the same courtesy. He didn't reply for a while before turning and looking at me in such a way that it felt like he was just looking straight through me…as if he could see that I really was a ghost or something.
"Go rest." He finally told me before walking back off towards where I supposed his post for the night was.
Chapter Five: Wall Sweet Wall
Sleep didn't come easy for me when I tried to do like Tristan said and it felt like when I finally had fallen asleep, Dagonet was gently waking me back up again.
"We'll reach the wall by evening." He told me before standing up to get ready and pack his horse to ride.
I stood up on shaky legs and drew Gawain's cloak around me, noticing that it had begun to smell…and not in a pleasant way. Sighing, I began to wonder what exactly was going on back in Sunnydale and if I would ever make it back there…alive.
"Dawn, if you would give me the honor for today?" A voice called.
Snapping out of my thoughts, I looked up to see Lancelot grinning down at me and offering me his arm to pull myself up in front of him on the horse. Giving him a small smile, I placed my hand on his forearm and let him easily pull me up until I was held securely against him with the rest of the men beginning to mount their horses around us.
I looked over in time to see Galahad looking over darkly in my direction with an odd look on his face before he said something lightly to his horse and began to take off with Arthur and Gawain. Leaning back against Lancelot's chest, I closed my tired eyes as he held the reins in front of me and effortlessly brought his horse into a canter to match the pace of his fellow Knights. The cold wind snapped against my face making me bring the hood of the cloak up and turn my face to the side to held protect it from the brutal weather. I wasn't sure how long we were riding but I did know that I was tired, cold, hungry, and feeling completely alone.
"Come, we're letting the horses rest for a bit." Lancelot said, jarring me from my thoughts as he gracefully dismounted.
Smiling tightly at him, I allowed him to help me down to the ground and began to stretch my legs that were beyond sore from all the riding we had been doing. I looked up and wasn't surprised to see Tristan walking off and Dagonet beginning to build the fire with Bors sitting on a log with a flask in his hand while he waved his fingers around, giving tips to Dagonet on how to build the flames. Pulling the murky cloak tighter around my shoulders, I walked off towards some bushes a ways away to relieve myself when the wind whipped around me and carried the familiar voice from the night before,
"Child…"
Bringing my head up sharply I was dumbfounded to see an older man, covered in blue like the other Woads had been, walking serenely towards me. Something in me responded to this person and I was incapable of screaming out for help as he came and stood in front of me with a soft smile on his face. Things clicked into place and before I could comprehend how I knew I whispered to the stranger with a staff,
"Merlin. You're Merlin aren't you? Arthur's advisor?"
Of course! How could I of possibly forgotten about this rather huge part of the Arthurian legends? Hope flared through my entire body and I quickly took a few more steps towards him asking,
"Can you send me back?"
I don't know how, but I knew that he knew who I was and exactly where I was from and how I was brought here. Now the only question was if he could reverse it somehow. Fog seemed to be floating around us easily and I could feel my heart fall for the zillionth time this journey when he looked at me sadly and slowly shook his head replying,
"Birth and death are natural cycles my Child…powers and forces not even I temper with."
"But my death wasn't even natural! I threw myself off a Hell-God's portal to home knowing it was MY blood that was the key and MY blood that had to be taken! How is that a 'natural cycle'?" I asked him angrily finally feeling as if I could let some of my frustrations out on this man.
"Your death cannot be changed, to do so would to tear these binds."
"What binds?" I asked slightly scared and even more than slightly angry.
"Their memories have vanished." He finally said instantly quieting anything I had to say or anything I had been thinking.
"Whose?" I whispered frantically.
"Thoughts and memories of you faded with your death…the magic was broken with your last breath in your world."
My eyes became unfocussed as I realized what he was telling me; the monks had altered reality to fit me into it but once I left, it was pushed back into place and the gap I had filled for that short amount of time was taken away. I slowly began to shake my head and said in denial with tears forming in my eyes,
"I remember. I remember the love I felt for my family and friends, they couldn't have just forgotten about me so easily. Especially not Buffy; we're sisters…her blood is my blood."
He sadly frowned and told me as gently as he could,
"You have her blood, yes, but she remembers you not as a sister. In her world you never were."
I took a horrified step back from him with wide eyes and said heatedly through clenched teeth,
"Shut up!"
"Be calm as this is not what I've wished to discuss with you this night. You have powers, powers you know not about, but powers that can be greater than those of your own time if you'd just let them a chance."
I was still shaking my head furiously at what he had told me but before anything else could said his head snapped up and his eyes became more alert before he turned back to me and said,
"I'll seek you out during the following new moon. Until then, rest easy Child, all shall be well soon enough."
With that he walked away through the fog back into the forest, both of us unaware of the fact that a certain Samartian scout sat crouched in the tree above us with his bow and arrow slowly lowering as he looked upon me in a new light.
"Dawn?" A voice called out making me turn around and see, surprisingly, Galahad walking towards me with an annoyed but concerned expression on his face.
"What's taken you so long?"
However when he came closer and saw my red and haunted eyes with tears still clinging to my skin his eyes narrowed and he asked quietly,
"What's happened?"
Shaking my head I tried to smile while telling him in a shaky voice,
"Nothing, just thinking of home is all."
His eyes softened some before he put a comforting hand on the small of my back and led me towards where the Knights were still resting and cooling down their horses.
When we began to move again, I was surprised when Galahad placed his horse in front of me and offered me his arm making me raise an eyebrow and ask dubiously,
"You're going to push me off your horse halfway through the ride aren't you?"
He sighed heavily and let his green eyes bore into mine until I finally relented and grasped his forearm with my hand, feeling the muscles flex as he easily lifted me up in front of him. Grabbing hold of the reigns in front of me, he let his arms rest comfortably across my hips while letting his horse trot forward towards where a few of the Knights were waiting and discussing. Heat coursed through me making me so warm that I struggled not to shift and dislodge the cloak that was wrapped snugly around me.
I could feel my heart picking up its speed while my body became oversensitive to the atmosphere around me along with the feel of his breath puff across my ear with every exhale he released. His chest was firm and inviting behind me, practically enfolding me into the concave it created and I couldn't help but notice that my head perfectly fit underneath his chin and against his shoulder should I let myself rest against him. Of all the Knights I was getting know, why was it that this Knight was the one that made me hyper aware to every movement he made behind me? I was never like this while riding with Dagonet or Lancelot…
"Why?" I murmured to myself aloud and regretted in when Galahad leaned forward so I was even further pressed against him and asked,
"What's that?"
I shivered at the feel of his voice vibrating against my ear before pulling myself out of my daze and asking,
"Why did you offer to ride with me?"
He pulled back but kept his arms comfortably tight around me while moving his horse into a run to follow the others and I knew I wouldn't receive an answer until he wanted to give me one. The ride, I noticed, was much more enjoyable than my previous ones as I was able to feel his muscles shift behind me with every move he made, and turn my body slightly into his to ward off the cold. It was just an attraction, I told myself, that was it…any girl would be attracted to this man and this was how my body was reacting. I still disliked him immensely and knew that he knew exactly how to push my wrong buttons but there was just something about him that drew me to him and I was damned sure going to find out what.
I looked up from my slight nap when I felt us starting to slow down and looked around noticing that we were no longer traveling across grass and plains but now slowing to a walk on a dirt path. Slowly lifting my head up I was struck speechless at the awe-inspiring sight before me. To read about and to see pictures of these sites in history books is one thing, but to be traveling against and able to reach out and graze my fingertips against the hardened stone was an entirely different something. People were milling about in the front and I could see Roman looking soldiers patrolling atop the wall just as Galahad told me dryly,
"After thirteen years the sight becomes someone duller."
Rolling my eyes I turned and retorted with an appraising look,
"My sincere regrets to your comrades then."
He narrowed his eyes at me from the insult I flung at him before purposely pulling the horse short and side-stepping something in the road causing me to gasp and clutch to his arms in order to avoid falling from the horse. Glaring, I turned around but he simply raised an innocent eyebrow and said,
"I told you I wouldn't push you from my horse half-way through the journey."
Huffing, I turned back in the saddle all the while muttering underneath my breath about the man sitting smugly behind me with an amused smirk plastered to his face.
"You both are worse than Bors and Vanora." Lancelot said coming up beside us with a grin on his face.
"He started it!" I said childishly but they both just grinned before Lancelot leaned forward saying suggestively,
"Vanora also seems to favor my company on the cold harsh winter nights. I can only hope you have the same preferences…"
My eyes widened slightly and I was shocked so that I didn't really notice Galahad tightening his arms around me significantly while throwing a dark look to the handsome Knight who was currently leering at me. Flustered that he had managed to embarrass me and took pleasure in it, I said as sweetly as I could,
"Lancelot, I wouldn't even let you through the door of my room in fear of what I might catch from you what with your…well traveled ways."
Galahad smiled widely behind me as Lancelot raised his eyebrows in surprise before grinning seductively saying huskily,
"I'll be visiting you soon my Lady…I .assure you"
Before I could reply, he spurred his horse forward making me whirl around and ask Galahad,
"Is he always such a whore?"
Galahad, Gawain, and Bors let out large peels of laughter at my words making the others around us look back in confusion while I stared in confusion at the three Knights who were gripping their sides in laughter, or in my case, Galahad squeezing my sides so tightly that I had to bat at his arms to release me some.
"Never heard of Lancelot put in such a light but I suppose it fits." Bors said with a large smile and shake of his head.
I looked up when we entered through the large gates, seeing Roman Guards waving flags above us as we all trotted into the village, the horses kicking up dust in our wake as villagers stopped to look or wave at the homecoming. We continued to ride through the village, the Knights expertly dodging villagers that lay in our path until we all entered into a large barn that I was happily able to pick out as the stables.
The smell of horses, hay, and something else rather unpleasant permeated the room and I had to slow my breathing down to calm inhales and exhales so I wouldn't gag on the air.
"Back so soon eh?" A friendly voice called out from the side as a few of the Knights began dismounting.
I looked over and saw a middle-aged portly man coming forward with a large brush in his hand and a smile covering his face.
"Nothing of interest…" Bors retorted while beginning to unload his horse.
"And who's this?" The man asked when he finally caught sight of me.
Galahad easily dismounted and surprised us all when he gently helped me down around the waist and placed me in front of the man who was smiling pleasantly.
"Hi, I'm Dawn." I introduced myself and held out my hand.
"My name is Jols, milady, and I'm at your service should you ever need it." He told me while kissing my offered hand delicately.
Smiling despite my slight blush I waved my hand at him in a dismissing manner and corrected him with,
"Just Dawn, I don't really like the whole lady thing."
He looked at me in surprise before smiling happily and nodding his head, taking hold of Galahads' reigns and began to take the horses one by one to their stalls.
"Come, I'll show you to your rooms for the time being." Arthur said from behind me and with a gentle but firm and guiding grip on my elbow, he led me from the stables and out into the busy village that lay before us.
Chapter Six: Loneliness is my familiar…
I don't know how long I sat on the dusty small bed in the quaint room Arthur had left me in, but it felt somewhat odd to be sitting on a mattress again or at least something a kin to a mattress. I had opened the windows and moved back the cloth acting as a curtain and was now sitting quietly on the edge of the bed just watching the sun slowly move out of sight beyond my window. The loneliness and sadness of everything I had left behind threatened to overwhelm me so I was beyond grateful when a firm knock on the door had me twisting to call quietly,
"Come in."
I smiled softly when I saw Dagonet poke his head in behind the door, his size compared to the doorway almost comical but the ever present solemn look on his face kept me from laughing.
"Come, we go to the tavern for food and drink." He said softly but in his gruff voice.
Deciding I probably had no choice in the matter, I sighed and nodded my head before walking towards him but was surprised when he placed a hand on my shoulder and gently tilted my chin upwards to meet his eyes that were searching mine intently.
"What upsets you Dawn?"
Tears gathered into my eyes but with his hand on my chin I couldn't turn away so I instead opted for squeezing them shut painfully and replying,
"I just miss my home is all."
His eyes saddened as well and he let his other hand come up and hold my cheek, his thumb wiping away the tears that made their way down my cheek.
"We'll help you find your way home, I swear it."
The fact that this giant of a man I had taken to as a Giles-like figure had just sworn to do something for me that I knew was impossible had me cracking a bit as my chin trembled and I allowed myself to fall against him and cling to his tunic.
"Shhh…" He whispered soothingly while letting his hands run up and down my back while I clung to him with sobs wracking my body.
It was a good few minutes later when he finally took my arm and began leading me from the room and I was beyond grateful to have Dagonet walking beside me to help and hold me up a few steps along the way. My eyes widened when we finally entered into the authentic tavern with laughter and shouting thrown across the room making me whisper in awe,
"The Bronze has nothing on this place."
Dagonet either didn't here me, which I doubted, or simply didn't choose to comment and instead led me towards the table of Knights with barmaids on their laps here or there. The sight of Galahad nuzzling the neck of a pretty red-head seated comfortably on his lap had me both faltering in my steps and my blood running cold and scorching hot at the same time making for an uncomfortable feeling.
We finally arrived and Gawain happily moved over to allow room for me while Dagonet went to the bar to get some drinks for all of us.
"Do your rooms suit you?" Gawain asked while taking a drink from his cup, a smile at the corner of his lips.
"Yeah, they're good." I said with a friendly smile of my own.
"If they do not give you what you need, my lady, my rooms are always available for you." Lancelot said with a smirk across the way, a girl of his own on his lap who looked quite put out at his statement.
Narrowing my eyes I told him with a devious smirk,
"Lancelot, there is nothing your room could provide that my room can't do for me already."
The Knights that were present all laughed and I noticed, with a certain amount of glee, the way Galahads' jaw had hardened at Lancelot's statement before his entire demeanor softened at my own.
"Perhaps, but how will you be sure? On your behalf, I offer my services to test out this theory of ours."
"I think I'll risk it, I can stand being wrong on a few occasions."
He smirked and leaned forward so our noses were almost touching causing my smirk to drop and my eyes to widen as he replied huskily,
"Whenever you feel to correct yourself, make sure to find me along the way."
The girl on his lap huffed and got up only to storm away from the bar while I leaned back with a light blush on my face causing Lancelot to grin in pride as Bors continued to cackle before wrapping an arm around my shoulder stating,
"You...lassie, are more entertaining than this entire lot put together!"
I laughed at his compliment before looking up when Dagonet's arm came across to place the cups of ale on the table before sliding one leg in through the bench next to me, letting his other leg remain on the outside so he was straddling the bench and facing me.
"Uh…isn't there water?" I asked meekly not really keen on the alcohol bit.
Dagonet just smiled and handed me a cup making me look into it and beam up at him when I realized it was just water staring back at me.
"Thanks." I whispered and guzzled the water heavily, feeling my dry throat cry out in glee when the liquid soothed it.
"You, men, are just going to drink yourselves into an early grave!" A female voice huffed as the cups around the table began to get refilled.
Looking up, I saw a pretty red-head scowling playfully at the group of men and was surprised when Bors pulled her into his lap and kissed her soundly on the lips amidst her unconvincing protests.
"I want you to meet someone." I heard him whisper as she pushed away from him gently, her cheeks slightly flushed and the pitcher forgotten on the table.
Smiling as he pulled her towards me I put out my hand and said as friendly as I could,
"You must be Vanora, I've heard a lot about you."
I knew I embellished a bit but from the happily surprised look on Vanora's face and Bors gentle smile in my direction I knew I'd do it all over again.
"Luv this is Dawn, something we picked up on the way back here."
She shook my hand with a wide smile before her eyes widened and she gasped asking Bors angrily,
"And just how long have you been back, hmm?"
"We got here a…" Bors began but Vanora cut him off and asked the rest of the Knights angrily,
"Look at her! Her dress is in tatters and you didn't think to find her something suitable to wear?"
Lancelot just leered at my visible skin while Bors began to try and calm Vanora who was saying some interesting and inventive things to her lover. Gawain just laughed at the scene as Dagonet stood up and swiped the cloak off a passing Roman who whirled around, obviously ready to start a fight of some sort, but at the sight of the Knights thought better of it and just walked off grumbling.
"Here." He whispered and wrapped the cloth around my shoulders tightly while Galahad watched our every move intently as he sipped from his cup, the girl on his lap trying to win back his attention.
"Come on girl, let us go and find you something to wear for the night." Vanora sighed and took my hand gently, leading me from the tavern as I shot a surprised look over my shoulder at the Knights who were watching us leave with a few grins here or there.
"Honestly, they can do anything and everything when it comes to war, weapons, and fighting but they can't get a simple dress for a lady traveling on the road with them." Vanora muttered to herself while fishing out a dress from her closet.
"You really don't have to do this, I can just wear this cloak…" I began but she stopped me with a gentle smile as a few kids ran between us with excited shouts and laughter before running back out the door into the night.
"Nonsense, here we are. It might not fit you properly but it least it will cover you for the night." She said handing me a blue dress.
Smiling my thanks, I waited until she left the room to slip it over my head…I practically swam in it! I knew I had lost some weight from my latest traveling but this was ridiculous. Ripping a piece from the cloak that now lay discarded on the bed, I tied it tightly around my middle as a make-shift belt and knew that it was the best that would do. Walking out to meet with Vanora, she turned and couldn't help the laugh that escaped her mouth when she caught sight of me.
"Extra birthing weight has expanded my dresses a bit, I'm sorry dearie."
I shook off her apology with a smile and shake of my head as she sighed and said,
"First thing tomorrow we'll get you some proper fitting dresses but let us get back to the tavern for the night."
"Do you need any help with it? I mean I've never worked in a bar but I could help pour drinks and stuff." I offered.
Her eyes lit up and she clasped my arm saying,
"I would appreciate that very much! It's just getting so hard what with the new baby coming and all."
My eyes widened and I turned to her in the middle of the cobble-stone street we were walking along and asked amazed,
"You're having another baby!"
Her own eyes widened along with the flushing of her cheeks and she turned my fully towards her saying in a whisper,
"Bors doesn't know it yet and I just realized it early this morning with the assistance of our midwife."
I squealed in happiness and gushed,
"Congratulations!"
She glowed and with a large smile gave me her thanks before leading me back to the tavern after I had promised my secrecy to her. As we continued to walk forward I began to wonder if I would ever leave this island and go back home, or if this was my fate…if I was going to stay here until I died with no family and no future.
Chapter Seven: Glimpse of a Kiss…
I was walking back to my rooms the next afternoon, completely loaded down with the amount of dresses that had been given to me after much persuasion and promises on Vanora's AND Arthur's part once he had been told of the ordeal. The cloth was heavier and darker than I was used to but I guessed it'd work well with the cold temperature around this place. With a great heave, I managed to unload the dresses on my bed before brushing down the cloth of the red one I had on now with a white belt at the middle and flowing sleeves. I wasn't familiar with loose fitting clothing compared to my modern-day skin-tight jeans and shirts but I guess it was more for movement and practicality, which in the end made more sense.
Venturing back out into the town, I passed by Dagonet in the blacksmith telling the smithy what new weapons he and the Knights needed done. He smiled and nodded his head at me when he saw me pass by and I waved eagerly back before continuing on in my trek. Before I could go into the bread shop for food, using the amount of money Vanora had given me for the work I did in the tavern last night, an arm wrapped snugly around my waist and Lancelot's smooth voice said in my ear,
"My lady, you're an absolute vision this day."
I smirked up at him and dislodged his arm, much to his amusement, and said back quickly,
"Thanks. You kind of stink though."
He chuckled and asked curiously,
"Where are you headed?"
Sighing, I shrugged my shoulders and explained,
"I've got no idea, just figured I'd wander for a bit and see what there was to see."
Nodding his head, he pointed across the way to what looked like a training field and I easily spotted out Galahad and Gawain sparring with each other along with a few Roman soldiers.
"Would you like to come and watch my expertise with the swords?"
Laughing, I finally conceded and nodded my head allowing him to lead me across the dusty street where he pointed to a wooden bench telling me to sit that he'd be back shortly.
"Dawn! You look beautiful this afternoon!" Gawain called back cheerfully when he spotted me and I tried with all my might not to notice the way my body heated when Galahad snapped his eyes towards me, letting them roam up and down my form.
"As opposed to all the other afternoons Gawain? What exactly are you trying to say?" I teased him much to his merriment.
I was surprised when the blade of a sword was placed in front of me making me look up only to see Lancelot grinning back down at me.
"What?" I asked him confused, wondering why he was offering me a sword.
"You didn't intend to remain seated did you?" He asked with a raise of his eyebrow.
"What? I thought that…" I began but he chuckled and pulled me up, leading me into the middle of the field.
"I wish to see what your sister has taught you. Will you indulge my wish?"
Hesitantly, I took the hilt of the blade that he offered me, surprised at how much heavier it felt now that I wasn't in the midst of battle as well as compared to the swords I was used to handling back home.
"We'll start slow, hmm?" He said and unsheathed one of his blades before turning back towards me.
Instincts kicked in when he brought down a blow on my head and I raised my own sword to block it, glaring up at him from beneath our connected blades asking angrily,
"Slow?"
He just grinned and spun his blade loose, walking around me in an appraising manner as Galahad, Gawain, and Bors came forward to watch the show much to my nervousness.
"You lead with your right." He finally announced making me turn back and about to ask him what the hell that meant but the comment died as I brought my sword to my side to deflect his blow…feeling the vibrations of the impact ring through my arms.
"That was a cheap shot." I said with a raise of my eyebrows and stepped back from him.
"I doubt our enemies will play fair my lady." He mocked but stopped short of laughing when I swiped my sword quickly forward causing him to be the one of the defense.
"You're right." I told him lightly with a shrug.
From there it was a flurry of movements but even as I began to sweat and breathe heavily with my arm trembling in tiredness I could tell that he wasn't putting forth all his effort. The Knights were cheering us on and soon Dagonet and Tristan joined the scene, both silent and observing the two of us as I whirled under a shot from Lancelot and managed to land on my feet after a ducking roll.
"You're more skilled than I expected you to be." He finally admitted but before I could accept the compliment, his sword clashed with mine, spun it around, and I felt helpless when I watched my blade spin to hit the dirt beside me. Just as quickly, the tip of his blade was pressed against my throat.
"Do you yield?" He asked and even though my pride was urging me to start in with hand-to-hand, I nodded my head with a soft smile and accepted defeat with a quiet,
"I yield."
He smirked and stepped back before stooping down and handing me the blade while the Knights applauded. Turning back towards the bench when Gawain and Bors began to spar and Dagonet went towards Lancelot with an odd gleam in his eye, I looked and saw that Galahad was the only one left sitting on the bench…where had Tristan gone off to?
"Hey." I said breathlessly, holding my hair up off the back of my neck.
He nodded his head stiffly towards me before asking,
"Your sister, how old is she?"
Stiffening myself at his question I told him,
"Twenty-eight."
There was silence for another moment until he turned his eyes towards me and said with all sincerity,
"She taught you well."
Slowly, a large smile spread across my face and I whispered back to him,
"Thank you, that means a lot."
He nodded and turned back to watch but I asked him,
"What about you? Do you have any sisters?"
His jaw tensed and when he turned to look at me I saw anger and sadness mixing together in them before he said gruffly,
"One, her name was Farrah."
"Was? She's…" I couldn't think of the most polite way to ask but he took over for me with a humorless laugh and said,
"I'm not certain but I doubt I shall see her alive."
"Why do you think that?" I asked him, confused and concerned.
He sighed and leant back against the wall letting me see his handsome profile before turning to me with now dark eyes and saying,
"None of us know what has happened to our tribes in Sarmatia and if we should make it off this island alive, it is unlikely that we should be reunited with them once more after fifteen bloodied years."
I furrowed my eyebrows at him but he just turned back to watch the mock fights letting me realize and soak in just how much I had in common with this man. Slowly, I placed my hand on his arm, feeling him tense beneath my skin as I expressed with complete conviction,
"I'm sorry."
His eyes locked with mine and a shiver dashed down my body at the act before he murmured,
"It's not needed."
We continued staring at each other and my heart rate began to pick up when we both began to unconsciously lean in towards one another and I could feel my breathing become heavier when his eyes flickered down towards my lips but before anything could happen he suddenly pulled back with wide eyes.
"I need to continue on practicing." He said in a low voice and rose from the bench before walking determinedly towards the training field.
Sighing in regret, I began to wonder why it was that I had to like one of the most stubborn, insensitive, and rude men I'd come across so far. I cracked it up to lust. Feeling someone standing behind me, I looked over my shoulder and was surprised to see Arthur standing almost regally behind me with a calm and collected look on his face.
"Hi, haven't seen you in a while." I commented standing up.
He looked down and smiled slightly at me saying,
"I've had a few matters that needed tending to."
Nodding my head I looked back and watched the Knights fighting making me comment to him,
"They're all amazing fighters from what I've seen."
His jaw clenched and he told me tensely,
"They've been trained to be."
Glancing at him I watched him watch his men with a certain air of pride before he met my gaze just as I told him,
"You've got to stop blaming yourself for this. You weren't the guy who drew up the contract Arthur."
His eyes clouded over but he continued on watching the spars telling me,
"These men are fighting, bleeding, watching brothers die for a soil and cause not of their own but of mine and my people. I have helped add onto the weight of such actions."
"They'll be free soon though…" I tried, hoping to cheer him up a bit but it seemed to do the opposite as he said almost angrily,
"They've been free since birth and a piece of Roman paper shouldn't assert that. I can only hope that no more lives be taken until the day comes when they can ride from these walls to live the remainder of their lives in a will of their own."
"A man can be in prison and still the cell walls can't take away his freedom." I told him making him look down at me with furrowed eyebrows,
"Explain such a thought, I beg you."
"The smell of the house you walk into everyday, the pictures you have in your mind of family and friends, the memories created in that house with that family and those friends are all part of freedom, the things you take with you. The things that nobody, despite how hard they try, can take away from you; they're yours to keep."
He continued staring at me with a slightly parted mouth making me smile and turn back to watch the fight while continuing on telling him,
"I always wondered how my sister was able to continually do the things she did without feeling like she had no choice in the matter, like all her liberties were taken away and she was just a mindless machine for the operator to use."
Making sure I still had his rapt attention I finished with,
"I asked her once about it but she just smiled at me and said 'you do what you can with what you've got'. I was young so I didn't understand but over the last couple of years I think I finally get it."
Turning fully towards him, I placed both hands on his arms and told him while wondering if it was possible to plagiarize a quote by someone who wasn't even alive yet,
"Freedom is what you do with what's been done to you. The men may be under the rule of the Roman Empire, but they're still Sarmatian Knights through and through."
Smiling, he leaned down and brushed a kiss across my forehead telling me,
"You give me peace of heart after I leave our conversations my lady, not a feat most can accomplish. I thank you."
I watched him walk away feeling slightly better myself; at least he wasn't complete intent on brooding as Angel always had been.
Chapter Eight: Dances to last a lifetime
Later that night in the tavern, I was wiping down tables with Vanora and a few of the other girls working with me when I saw Galahad and Gawain come in with large smiles on their faces and white tunics. My mouth went dry when I realized that Galahad had just washed as the tunic was clinging to his skin and molding to his body, now partially see-through so I was able to see what years of fighting and training had done for his body.
"You're watering the table." Vanora said with a knowing smile making me blush and snap my mouth closed.
"Galahad is it?" She asked with a teasing smirk.
"Be quiet!" I admonished playfully and hit her lightly with the wet rag.
She walked away laughing and a few minutes later returned with a pitcher of wine and literally pushed me the way to the table they were now occupying each with a woman on their laps, much to my vexation.
"He'll never notice you if you constantly shy away from him dearie." She told me while putting the pitcher in my grasp and shoving me forward so that I gasped when I hit against the table making the occupants all look up surprised.
"What a vision! A lovely lady with a pitcher of drink!" Gawain teased holding up his cup while I tried to remain calm and not look over at Galahad…too much.
"Want some?" I finally asked when I had taken my time pouring Gawain his drink.
He looked up from whispering into the girl's ear and without saying a word to me, held up his cup and went back to the girl much to her delight. Doing my best not to glare, I set the cup back down and went to turn around only to run into Bors.
"Have you seen Vanora?" He asked taking a seat at the table while I poured him a drink as well.
Nodding my head, I pointed over the rows of head and watched with envy as he lit up at the sight of his lover before turning back with a smile and taking a sip of the drink.
"You did well today, earlier in the field." He complimented me.
Smiling, I thanked him and walked back towards the bar setting the pitcher down and throwing Vanora an annoyed look.
"He noticed you did he not?" She asked with a raised eyebrow.
Sighing I told her,
"No, he's too busy jamming his tongue down her ear!"
She looked up at me, shocked by my outburst before I moaned and placed my head in my hands saying,
"I don't understand! When I first met him I was practically sure that I hated him and even more certain that the feeling was mutual. Now all of a sudden it's like I just can't stop thinking about him, touching him, smiling at him, and if you even think of saying that I'm in love with him I'll kill you."
She laughed and wrapped her arms around me in a loose hug saying with a sigh,
"Give it time luv, it'll come around."
"What will come around though? I don't even know what what is." I moaned.
Patting my back sympathetically we both looked up when some lively music started in the middle of the tavern and soon the skirts of barmaids and women were twirling in the air to the time of the beat.
"Vanora!" We both heard Bors holler across the way.
She rolled her eyes with a fond smile and I couldn't help but laugh as she yelled back at him in annoyance but soon after I saw the two of them moving swiftly around the dance floor. The night continued on in the same manner with music and dancing, Lancelot bounding in with a wicked smirk on his face, and Dagonet and Tristan silently walking in towards the back tables.
Pouring another drink for the man in front of me, I looked out and saw with annoyance that Galahad was dancing with a different woman from earlier, both of them smiling and laughing with each other happily. Before I could think too much on it an arm wrapped around my waist from behind me and I yelped in surprised as I yanked off towards the dance floor.
"A pretty lady such as you should be dancing as well." Lancelot told me with a grin before spinning me around only to pull me quickly back into the circle of his arms.
"And you deem yourself worthy to dance with me?" I asked him in a mockingly aristocratic voice.
My teasing smile fell however as he pulled me roughly against him so our bodies were perfectly aligned against one another making me let out a low gasp of surprise.
"Am I worthy, my lady?" The husky way he asked the question had me blushing a bit and looking down much to his amusement but before he could tease me any more he began to twirl us slowly around the large fire in the middle of the tavern with the other dancers, his eyes locked steadily on mine.
Hesitantly I let my arm come up and rest across his shoulder while my other hand was held in his firmly, both us staring at each other as dancers who were spinning much faster than us began to pass and swirl around us.
"Did I tell you that you again look beautiful tonight? He whispered while tightening his grip on my waist so I was pulled against him once more.
I smiled my thanks at him and raised my eyebrows in impressed surprise when he took my hand and twirled me under his arm before pulling me back against him and stepping expertly back into the dance.
"You're a surprisingly good dancer." I commented as Galahad and the woman he was dancing with past us, him sending a look in our direction before turning his attention back to the lady.
He just grinned down at me and replied smoothly,
"It's the company I keep."
I felt safe, pressed against him and wrapped in him, but it was more or a paternal safe than a romantic safe I felt…sort of like when I had been around Spike. The memory of his death caused my eyes to fall some and my countenance to sadden making Lancelot ask gently,
"Have I said something?"
Smiling tightly up at him I shook my head and whispered,
"No, it's just that you remind me so much of a…man I knew back home. I miss him, a lot."
He raised his eyebrows to let me know to continue as I finally said,
"He was like a brother to me, there when I needed him and there to kind of protect me when I needed it."
He smiled a smile I hadn't ever seen on him before just as he told me,
"I'm honored that you relate such a memory to me."
I laughed and told him with all sincerity,
"If I had ever had a brother, I'd like to think he'd be something like you…of course without all the flirting and dirty innuendos."
He tilted his head back and let out a loud laugh while continuing on spinning me around the dance-floor before he looked back down on me with softened eyes and told me,
"And if I had ever been able to watch my sister grow into a woman, I'd hope to see her as you are standing before me tonight."
My eyes watered at his extreme compliment as I knew how these men felt about all they had left back at home and before he realized it, I released my hands and threw my arms around him, squeezing him tightly to me. I was happily surprised when he let his own arms come around me to hold me close. It was in those fleeting moments that the dynamics of the relationship Lancelot and I had changed instantly.
Pulling back I saw a wicked gleam enter his eyes as he stared at something over my head and before I had the chance to ask him about it, he spun me away from him while taking hold of the arm of the girl Galahad was dancing with as they both passed by us. I gave a surprised 'oof!' as I smashed into Galahad's chest while Lancelot pulled the stunned albeit cheerful girl into his arms and swayed away across the dance-floor. Breaking away from Galahad who had instinctively wrapped his arms around me to steady my fall, I looked up with a light blush across my cheeks and shrugged my shoulders at his look.
"Don't look at me."
A few moments passed in tense silence before Bors and Vanora came swinging by with large smiles while Bors called out,
"C'mon both of ya's! Either dance or move the bloody hell out of the way!"
He received a smack to the arm from his lover while I tentatively bit my lip and looked up at Galahad before sighing with a soft smile and holding my hand up to him saying,
"Let's see if you're as good as Lancelot."
Misreading the look of loathing on his face I glared and let my arms drop snapping out,
"Sheesh, all you had to say was you didn't want to dance!"
I was about to turn on my heel and march back to my post at the tavern to wallow in self-pity but before I could get very far a strong hand gripped my arm and pulled me back to my spot in front of him. Without saying a word he wrapped an arm around my waist and took hold of my left hand before moving us slowly around in large circles. Heat flushed through me once again and I was worried that my heart was going to leap out of my mouth at how fast it began beating when he tightened his grip around me and pulled me closer against him.
The music wrapped around us and held me against this man and I let my eyes close slightly and unconsciously rested my head against his shoulder much to his surprise. I could feel him tense some before relaxing and he even began to rub his thumb against the side of my waist while I breathed in the scent of him deeply. I was so used to the guys of my time to cover up their scents with the chemicals of cologne that the refreshing smell of soap, hay, and something else underneath took me with a pleasing revelation; this is what a man smelt like without a manufactured smell and something deep inside of me was responding to the masculinity of it!
"Does working at the tavern suit you?" He finally asked and I reveled in the feel of the vibrations caused by his voice humming against my cheek.
Reluctant to look up and break away from my position I just shrugged against him, effectively bringing us closer and replied,
"It's alright, nothing I can't handle."
He didn't reply and I already missed the feel of his voice against my cheek but was satisfied when he simply let our forms meld together easily and naturally sending a shiver down my spine. Immediately saddened when the last few notes were left to die softly and slowly, I began to move away from him but he tightened his hold on my back causing me to look up quickly at him. His darkened eyes had me squelching back a gasp or moan, I couldn't tell which, and my eyes darted to his lips when he leaned in closer to me and asked,
"How do I compare?"
Too dazed to understand what he was asking, I continued on letting my eyes linger on his lips only to rush back up to meet his amused but still darkened eyes and asked him breathlessly,
"What?"
The corners of his mouth turned up into an all too alluring grin before they parted and his deep voice came through, rumbling now against my stomach,
"To Lancelot?"
My eyebrows rose and before I knew what I was doing, I let my hands come up and my fingers brush against his beard and I watched in fascination as his eyes dilated before I whispered in response to his question,
"Oh…"
I don't know how long we were standing there locked in our stance and connection but soon the sounds of holler, yells, and cat-calls had us both looking up in confusion only to realize we were the only couple still left standing on the dance-floor.
"Are ye going to kiss her or just stare at her?" Bors familiar voice hollered through making my cheeks stain an even darker red. To my surprise Galahad just grinned before taking my hand and kissing my knuckles lightly. My hand instantly began to tingle while his beard scratched gently against my sensitive skin there.
"Thank you for the dance my lady." He whispered and his warm breath washed over the spot he had just kissed and I knew it was impossible to hide the goose-bumps that sprouted up and down my arms, much to his silent pride.
Nodding my head, I gently took my hand away and swiftly made my way back behind the bar where I remained in hiding for the rest of the night.
Chapter Nine: A Gift from the Heart
"But he noticed you, did he not?" Vanora countered as we walked from street vendor to vendor for food and such while I attempted to admonish her for her blunt moves last night.
"Of course he did, who wouldn't? I was a complete klutz and utter fool!" I said throwing my hands in the air.
She just laughed and shook her head saying in that all-knowing voice of hers when it came to matters of the heart,
"He wasn't staring at you as one would a fool, it was all telling in his eyes."
A part of me warmed at that and a silly smile covered my face but fell just as instantly when she said dryly,
"Now he might have been when you ran behind the bar for the rest of the evening however."
I pushed her good-naturedly, mindful of the baby in her stomach that she was planning on telling Bors about tonight. We both stopped at a man's booth selling much to my horror…chickens.
"You mean they don't come pre-dead?" I called out with disgusted wide eyes.
Both Vanora and the man gave me strange looks while she said she'd need two as I started in with,
"But how can you kill these poor defenseless animals? I mean look at how…ACK!" I screamed jumping back, grabbing onto my hand when said 'defenseless' animal attempted to bite onto my index finger viciously.
Vanora just threw her head back and laughed while I pointed my finger at the chicken angrily saying,
"Fine, be that way then! Let's just see who's going to be the chicken in the chicken-soufflé tonight!"
"Threatening a powerless animal Dawn? Really, I thought higher of you." Lancelot's taunting voice came from behind me.
Turning around and giving him a sickly sweet smile I told him in a sugary voice,
"Put your finger in front of it, c'mon, I dare you."
He simply shook his head in amusement at me before wrapping an arm around my shoulder and pulling me against him lightly asking,
"Are you hungry then?"
"Nah, Vanora's already fed me." I told him with a wave of my hand much to his mirth while Vanora collected the clucking chickens causing me to scoot speedily to the other side of Lancelot making the two of them exchanged entertained smiles with one another. Bors joined on the other side of Vanora, taking her bought produces and asked,
"What's takin' yeh so long?"
"Dawn attempted to save our dinners' life a few moments back." She answered with all sincerity making Bors stop in confusion, Lancelot laugh, and me glare at Vanora as she did her best to smother her laughter.
"The stupid thing tried to bite me…bite me!" I cried holding the offended finger out in front of us for all to see.
"Our chicken tried to bite yer finger after yeh attempted to save it from being eaten?" Bors asked with furrowed eyebrows making Vanora and Lancelot give out barks of laughter drawing attention in our direction.
"Yeah, going now." I drawled and went to move away in another direction but stopped when we came upon Galahad and Gawain in front of us, obviously walking leisurely around as well.
"What's got you all laughing?" Gawain asked with a twinkle in his eye as I did my best to avoid Galahad's gaze.
"Dawn almost had her finger gnawed on by our pullet." Vanora explained to them while wiping tears from her eyes as I crossed my arms and huffed out,
"It's not that funny."
"Why would it try and bite her?" Galahad asked as confused as Bors had been a moment ago…and probably still.
"She tried to prove that it was…what was it dearie? A 'defenseless animal'?"
Mumbling underneath my breath just made the two new Knights of our company laugh with the others as well and it wasn't long when Vanora was telling the story all over again much to the Knights' amusement and my embarrassment.
"Well now that my embarrassment has been drawn out as long as possible, I think I'm going to go now."
Lancelot laughed and kissed me briefly good-bye on the cheek, much to the silent consternation of Galahad, calling out as I walked away from the group,
"Careful luv, I saw a man selling pigs on the other side!"
Their laughter followed me as I made my way down the town, not quite knowing where I was going, but enjoying the walk all the same and exchanging smiles with others who passed by with kids or groceries of their own.
"Hello." A voice said beside me.
Turning my head I widened my eyes to see Galahad look down at me with a curious look on his face but the look was answered when he asked,
"Why have you been avoiding me as of late?"
"I haven't been avoiding you." I replied as convincingly as I could.
He simply raised a knowing eyebrow while I ducked my head down to watch the cobblestones disappear beneath my feet but stopped when he took hold of my elbow and asked,
"Did I offend you last night?"
My head shot straight up and I locked eyes with him, saying breathlessly with a vigorous shake of the head,
"No, of course not!"
"Then why have you been evading me?"
"I didn't know that you were seeking me out. Was there something you needed?" I countered trying to turn the tables towards him.
He just smirked and took a step closer to me replying in a softer voice,
"Do I need a reason to want your company?"
Feeling parts of the old me coming back, I mirrored his smirk and reminded him with,
"Well I remember a few days ago you almost pushed me from your horse."
"I was simply striking back for when you knocked me to the ground quite forcefully." He said smoothly making me narrow my eyes and take an unconscious step forward as I said through clenched teeth,
"To save you from an arrow!"
"That I could have stopped myself." He ended with, keeping his eyes locked on mine.
Throwing my hands up in the air I said exasperatedly,
"Fine! The next time I see an arrow flying straight at you, I'll just sit and watch it go by. Will that satisfy you?"
My body flamed when he placed his hand on my hip and said in a low voice,
"One of the many things that will, yes."
I practically froze under his eyes and touch and could do more than attempt to breathe in even patterns without letting him hear the hitches in my breath when he would let his thumb rub over my waist as he had done last night.
"I enjoyed dancing with you last night." He finally said, breaking the tense but exciting silence.
"Me too, you're not a completely horrible dancer." I complimented him with an attempted joke but unable to tear my eyes away while he stepped even closer towards me.
I was surprised when he reached a hand up and behind my head to pull my hair loose, pulling it around my face and brushing it over my shoulders as he told me,
"You look beautiful with your hair down, did you know?"
I could only shake my head while I placed one hand on the forearm that was beside my head with the hand attached to it still in my hair.
"I'll leave you to your time then and hope to see you tonight in the tavern." He said and with one last look, released me and sauntered back towards where he had come leaving me a gooey-mass of hormones and weakened knees. Blasted Knight! Sighing, I turned around and smiled in surprise when I saw Dagonet making his way towards me, inspecting the sword I had seen him working on a few days ago.
"You finished it?" I asked eagerly coming up towards him while staring curiously at the weapon in his hands.
He smiled softly down at me and held it out for my inspection while saying quietly but gruffly,
"Yes, I managed to sharpen the edge in the fashion I wished."
I smiled and eagerly ran my hands down the polished steel, reveling in the fact that I had seen this sword in the making and now the finished product was lying threateningly in my hand.
"It's beautiful." I whispered letting my index finger run down the engraving on the side causing me to look up questioningly at him.
"It's Sarmatian…it means morning light."
The fact that he knew how to spell during this era wasn't what surprised me but what the inscription said did.
"Did you…is this…?" I couldn't finish it in fear of embarrassment that he didn't mean it in the way I was taking it.
He took the cloth away from the hilt of it and put it aside in his pants before answering me with a solemn,
"Every warrior should have a weapon."
I tried really hard not to let the tears show, really I did, but they came pouring down anyways as I gripped the sword tightly in my grasp and stared up at him in awe. He smiled at my show of emotions just as I yanked him down and kissed his cheek before grasping him in a bone-crunching hug.
"Thank you. No one's ever given me something like this before." I whispered into his ear.
He pulled away and wiped my tears away in an uncharacteristically gentle manner and said while taking my arm,
"Come, you still need a bit more training."
Laughing and punching his arm lightly, I let him lead me to the training field all the while staring in awe and happiness at my specially hand-crafted sword.
Chapter Ten: Letting us in Slowly
By the time I finally sat down, I felt like I had all those nights after doing heavy duty patrolling with Buffy and getting my ass handed to me. Dagonet had simply nodded goodbye and walked away back to God knows where. I winced for the hundredth time as I wiped down another table at the tavern, picking up left goblets and walking back towards the bar area.
Looking over at a table across the room, I sighed as Gawain hollered at me and held up his goblet in the air all the while never taking his eyes off the woman who sat comfortably in his lap. Walking over to him, I took hold of his cup and asked dryly,
"You rang?"
He looked up at me briefly before going back and whispering something in the girls ear to make her blush and giggle. Wincing as I handed Gawain's cup back to him, I was surprised at the feel of hands rubbing gently into my shoulders making me instantly sag as the relief flowed through me.
"Why are you sore?" Lancelot asked me concerned while making me sit down on the bench in front of him so he could continue on working my shoulder and neck muscles out.
"Dagonet trained me with my sword this afternoon." I explained in a whispered voice as another hand took the pitcher of wine from me; not that I noticed presently at first.
"Your sword?" he repeated.
Smiling, I nodded my head slightly and told him,
"He made me a sword and it's beautiful and mine."
He didn't respond and just continued to rub his strong and deft fingers into my neck causing me to get a few unnoticed envious looks.
"Arthur wishes for us to ride out tomorrow afternoon and patrol the borders of the wall." He told me making me look up and ask hopefully,
"Me too?"
He shook his head and made me turn my head back down so my chin was resting against my chest and answered,
"No, you are to stay here safely inside the fort."
Snorting I replied slightly angrily,
"He doesn't think I can take care of myself."
"No, we all just wish for the peace of mind to know that you are safely wrecking havoc among the innocent men and women in this fort rather than our own poor souls."
I didn't have the strength or will to reach back at swat at him but as I was about to retort, a loud roar was heard a ways away making quite a few heads turn up along with the corners of my mouth.
"She told him then." I said aloud making Gawain and Lancelot look at me questioningly but I just shook my head and replied,
"Nope, it's not my news to tell but I bet you're all going to know about it before the night is through."
Looking over when someone sat next to me, I tried hard not to blush when I saw it was Galahad who was looking curiously at Lancelot and me, his jaw clenched.
"I'm kind of sore from training earlier today so he's helping me out." I explained to him, not sure why I felt compelled to diffuse the situation as quickly as possible.
I looked up when Lancelot suddenly stopped and saw that he was grinning devilishly at a red-headed woman from across the bar who was helping to wipe down tables.
"Her name's Evelyn, she just started working here tonight and she's totally shy." I informed him.
"Evelyn…" He mused testing the name out on his lips.
Rolling my eyes, I shoved him in her direction to which he didn't need much prodding and I watched amused when he let his stride turn into somewhat of a strut before he reached her side.
"What a whore." I joked good-naturedly making Galahad smile, him internally relieved that I had no jealousy of Evelyn for the attention Lancelot was now laying quite thickly on her.
"So I hear you boys are going out tomorrow." I commented as easily as I could but was able to see the way his eyes clouded over and his demeanor soured.
"Bloody Romans." He muttered underneath his breath while taking a sip of his drink almost angrily…that is if you could drink angrily.
"Will it be dangerous?" I asked nonchalantly trying to hide the concern I was feeling but he just looked at me and smiled softly replying,
"Fear not my lady, you shall see us all again in one piece before the night is done with tomorrow."
We smiled at each other softly making Gawain roll his eyes heavenward, unnoticed by either of us, before turning his attention back to the pretty brunette in front of him.
"I should probably get back to work." I whispered and went to stand but Galahad stopped me with a touch on the wrist that had me plummeting back down to my seat involuntarily.
"I would like to show you something." He told me making me cock my head and look at him curiously.
"Sure, what?" I asked intrigued.
"Will you follow me?" He asked already beginning to stand.
A silly smile melted across my face and I shrugged saying happily.
"You betchya."
Five minutes later after winding through the dusty alley-ways of the fort, we were stopped on a grassy knoll staring at mounds with swords and armory on them and smoke coming from them in streams.
"What is this?" I asked breathlessly staring out at all the graves.
"Nights ago I told you of the brethren we've lost, this is the cemetery we've buried them in." He explained to me, walking in-between them all before crouching beside a grave while I took a spot next to him and looked at him curiously.
"Yvain, he was the closest I had to a brother in the beginning years of our service to the Roman Empire."
I looked at the menacing looking armory engraved with lions, along with the sword that lie stuck in the dirt in front of us like a stone against battering waves almost.
"He was killed seven years ago during the same battle that Gawain's brother, Gareth, was killed. This is how Gawain and I have come to be so close; we shared the same grief and carry the same guilt."
He pointed his finger across the way towards another grave I assumed to be Gareths'. I looked back solemnly at Galahad who seemed to be reminiscing on memories of the two men and I couldn't help that happily sad feeling that bubbled within me at the knowledge that he was opening up from me. Deciding to return the favor I told him,
"My mom died when I was fourteen and my sister found her body at home, I don't think I've ever stopped believing it was my fault for her death. I watched three people I considered closer than family be murdered in front of me eyes and I was unable to stop their deaths."
He looked over at me in surprise but I was simply staring up into the skies and continued on with,
"You know they say that time heals all wounds but I know there's always going to be a battle scar left over, and I believe that's a good thing. I don't think you're ever supposed to forget the pain you just fill it with something like memories of the person you lost…good memories."
He smiled and leaned back on his elbows telling me,
"I remember days when Yvain and I would spar with one another, I'd never received so many wounds in a matter of one day but I enjoyed it immensely. Having him with me made it easier to forget that I'm a slave to these damnable bastards. A night doesn't go by when I wish to have him back by my side with a sword against my throat."
Laughing I added with,
"And I'd do anything to have my mom yelling at me to hurry up, wake-up, or get my chores done. I'd give anything just to hear her voice, to listen to her saying my name once more in the way that she did…just to see her walking through the door one more time."
We both continued sitting in our comfortable silence before I broke it by laying a hand over his I pointed up to the skies and said as cheerily as I could,
"I remember being told once about an Eskimo legend in that it's not really stars in the sky but openings where our lost loved ones shine down to let us know they're alright."
He let his fingers intertwine with mine before looking at me and asking,
"And how many stars overhead do you recognize as yours?"
Smiling I replied,
"More than I want to have."
He remained staring at me and told me in a somber seriousness,
"I've not yet spoken to any, outside of Gawain, about the grief I carry inside."
"Then I'm glad you decided to share it with me, really."
"Are you?" He asked somewhat surprised.
Nodding my head I spoke without thinking,
"It makes me feel closer to you."
He grinned and asked in a devilish voice,
"And you wish to be closer to me?"
Widening my eyes I turned away from him and continued looking ahead making him chuckle and give my hand a reassuring squeeze before he too turned and looked out into the night.
I don't know how long we sat out there on the hill but when I finally began making my way back to my rooms alone I saw a single, and familiar, figure silhouetted in the stables brushing down a horse.
"Arthur." I grinned to myself with a fond shake of the head.
Taking in a deep breath and walking forward, I waved cheerfully when he looked over his shoulder and saw me making his way up to his side to begin brushing the horse with my own hands…loving the feel of it beneath my fingers.
"I heard about your little excursion for tomorrow." I finally said breaking the comfortable silence.
He looked down at me and back up to his task just as quickly commenting in the way I'd expect a leader to talk to a subject with,
"The borders must be maintained and rigorously checked at all times."
"For what?" I prodded him.
"People who will bring ill will upon our walls." He replied stiffly.
Smiling up at him I let my arm rest upon the horses' back and said teasingly,
"Well then you might as well make camp out there because there's always going to be an enemy, no matter how many you fight and defeat."
He sighed and finally let his tiredness show in his eyes while he mirrored my position facing me and said wearily,
"I wish for peace, a peace that could stretch across our land with its fingertips never reaching an end. I've seen too much death and violence now for me to believe that such a dream is possible."
Smiling still up at him in a softer manner I said as gently as possible,
"You can't wish for peace and salvation of the world Arthur, it's too big. You can only hope instead that in later years, history will remember you for your never-ending quest of peace in that you only created war in hope for peace and men will strive to follow your example."
"Nothing good can ever come from war and death Dawn, nothing."
"Yes well, you must first create peace…mold it and then maintain it, only then will you begin to spread your thoughts and wishes on the subject."
He sighed and bowed his head asking sadly,
"And how is that possible in this world?"
Smiling widely, I placed a hand on his back and told him with all sincerity,
"If there is any man capable to do something like this, it's you."
He looked up at me in surprise and dubiousness but I just shook my head and told him bluntly,
"I'm not talking world-peace kind of thing because as long as there's power for the taking there will always be war. I'm talking about here, right where we are that you can begin to make your mark."
"How?" He asked completely taken aback but utterly intrigued with rapt attention.
"Your faith, strength, will, and sense of justice are more dangerous and more powerful forces to be reckoned with than any weapon that will ever be created. Your character is something that is indestructible and you will beat any enemy with it."
His mouth parted some and his eyes widened with a hope I hadn't seen on him while I finished off with a quiet,
"You may not be a King of man, Arthur, but you will be a King of Men."
I stood up on my tippy-toes and kissed the dumb-struck man's cheek before all but skipping back to my room feeling so much more valuable after I have talks like that with Arthur…my opinion finally mattered!
Chapter Eleven: The Enemy of My Knights is My Enemy
"Just be careful alright?" I asked pleadingly while staring up at the Knights who were mounting their horses to ride out for patrolling.
"Would you stop worrying so heavily Dawn?" Lancelot prodded gently with an amused smile.
"Fine, get killed! Is that any better?" I asked with a sly smirk making him laugh and take my hand in his giving the back of my knuckles a chaste kiss before he spoke with,
"I'll see you later this evening, I assure you."
With that, he kicked his horse after Arthur who inclined his head to me in a silent good-bye and unspoken message in his eyes that I alone understood before leading the way out of the stables with Tristan already having left to scout ahead. Did that man ever sleep? I looked up as Bors rode by slightly groggily making me laugh and blow a kiss at him when he brightened upon seeing Vanora come up by my side to hand him an extra cloak.
"Take care of her, yeah?" He asked me while kissing his lover goodbye to which I nodded my head and saluted while patting Gawain's leg when he passed by the two of us with a flirty wink and wave.
"I wish for you to ponder how you will greet me when I return and remember that a kiss can often be overlooked!"
I laughed and shook my head just as Dagonet rode by and stooped down on his horse to brush a kiss on my forehead,
"Keep training with your sword, you're getting better."
Nodding my head, I smiled and kissed his cheek as he trotted out leaving Galahad looking down at me as Vanora made a subtle exit, motioning to me that she'd wait for me outside.
"Be careful." I told him with a stern voice.
He smiled and took the hand Lancelot hadn't taken and let his lips linger on my skin when he pressed the complete opposite of Lancelot's kiss across my knuckles…long and tingly.
"I'll seek you out tonight." He told me before riding away but not before I had given his hand an extra squeeze with mine.
Sighing, I waited until the dust settled from their horses' legs and walked over to where Vanora was waiting with a grin on her face and hands on her hips but I was relieved when she didn't mention on it and instead led me out into the bustling fort telling me all the comic moments of her revealing to Bors last night that left me in stitches and sore sides.
The afternoon slowly melded into dusk and I found worry edging its way forward while I continually looked up hoping to see the seven forms walking tiredly into the tavern.
"What's taking them so long?" I asked Vanora as she stood next to me pouring a drink for a Roman Soldier.
"Don't fret so Dawn, they'll return, I promise." She said softly with a gentle touch to my shoulder before walking back through the tavern, filling drinks as she went. It was at this moment that the familiar call of my name floating around me had my head snapping up and realizing with wide eyes that the largest full moon I had seen in a while stood staring back down at me.
"Merlin." I whispered to myself and looked around before slipping soundlessly out of the tavern in a slight daze just letting my body and something else lead me through the streets until I found myself walking softly into the stables where a single light was being emitted from the furthest stall in the back.
Walking towards it, I stopped short when he walked out with a gentle smile on his face and slight surprise in his eyes.
"Didn't think I'd come?" I asked him with a raised eyebrow feeling the effects of his call starting to wear off my body so I was no longer feeling as if I'd been in a trance.
"Our meeting did not go as I'd hoped last…I'm surprised you came." He admitted while staring at me in such a way all too reminiscent of Tristan. Looking around I asked in a light but loaded voice,
"Is it just coincidence that you called me out here during the same night that Arthur and his Knights are off patrolling?"
He gave me a small smile and walked closer towards me until we were almost nose-to-nose but keeping my hesitance in check I didn't back away once from him.
"So much power in you, like a spring from the sea." He whispered and looked to be searching through my eyes like one would a computer screen.
"Yeah well being a hell-goddesses key can do that to a person." I replied flippantly with a shrug of my shoulder.
He shook his head and told me with a leveled gaze,
"What is inside of you is yours to guard and yours to keep; you are the origin, not your purpose."
It took me a while to sift through that to figure out what he meant and when I finally did I asked,
"What kind of powers are we talking about here?"
I flinched a bit when he brought his hand up to my forehead and told me,
"If nurtured and given chance to grow, powers so great they'd rival my own."
My eyes widened at that and a goofy smile crossed my face as I said in a kid-like voice,
"Willow would be so jealous."
He let his hand lower back to his side and leaned against his staff saying cautiously,
"If you would allow, I could help you in this…help you to grow into yourself."
Narrowed my eyes at him I asked suspiciously,
"Why? And how could you help?"
Sighing, he turned to the side and spoke to me in a somber voice with,
"Evils will happen soon, evils I alone will not be able to conquer and I will need your help in more than one manner to defeat such malevolence."
"Why not just ask Arthur and his Knights to help you out? I mean how many times have you helped him now?" I asked making him flinch visibly before he turned to me and spoke with,
"Arthur must not know of our meetings child."
"What? Why?" I asked taken aback and confused.
"He would not allow such a thing."
"Why not? I mean aren't you his advisor or…" I stopped when a few things finally clicked in place.
This King Arthur wasn't the stuff I read about it legends or saw in movies…it was completely altered and combined with the blue paint and tattoos I finally, after our previous meeting, saw adorning his skin I spoke quietly with,
"Woads…you're one of them."
He smiled tightly and corrected me with,
"I lead them."
Widening my eyes, I took a step back and threatened him with,
"I'll scream. If you kill me they'll…"
"Child, I wish you no harm, I do not intend to kill you."
"Then why did you send your Woads to attack…" I began but he stopped me again with,
"I had no quarrel with you and had I known earlier that you were among their company, I would not have ordered the attack."
Shaking my head angrily I all but spat at him,
"I saw, I saw the graves of my friends' brothers last night, what you had your men do."
"And as you rode to Hadrien's Wall you were walking over the ashes of my people, killed by the swords of Arthur's Knights. One side is not just the wrong side Dawn, just a different belief."
We stood in silence for a few more moments until he finally turned away and said,
"Think upon what has been said this night, I will seek you out…"
"No." I said firmly, stopping him from finishing his sentence.
He turned to me with a silent look on his face and I finished slightly angrily with,
"I don't care what you could do for me; I don't any type of help you could give me."
I went to walk away but he stopped me with,
"You will not be able to contain your powers without help and guidance child."
"What are you talking about?" I all but hissed at him.
"So great are they that without help of a means from your body, you will be unable to contain such a force."
"And what will happen if I just leave it? If I decide not to help them to 'grow' and I don't have an outlet? Besides, I haven't felt anything yet, no powers and no pain, I'm perfectly fine." I challenged with an angry glint in my eyes.
"There is no option involving your powers not coming to you child, they will come but if you do not receive help in controlling them they will kill you. You will begin to feel such things when the blood moon rises."
"Then I'll get rid of them, I never wanted the damned things in the first place."
He smiled almost patronizingly making me bristle and told me in the calmest voice as if talking about the night weather,
"They are part of you; to get rid of them would be to get rid of the body standing before me on this night. Allow me to help you, to teach you and this shall not have to come to pass."
I stood in silent contemplation for a moment before telling him,
"I'm not afraid of death Merlin and if I die, again, then I die because there is no way in hell you could EVER get me to betray them."
With that I turned on my heel and walked back out through the stable doors and into the clear sky wondering if I had just made one helluva mistake unknowing that the Knights had already returned with Tristan a few minutes ahead as always and he slowly came out from behind the stable doors, watching my form disappear as the words he had just heard spoken rang clear through the night. Turning his head slightly he heard the whispered words of Merlin say, unsure if to him or if he was speaking to himself,
"You shall seek me out child, on that night, you shall come to me."
Walking back into the tavern going over the conversation I just had, I looked up and let out a loud squeal at the sight of dirty and tired looking Knights converged at a table in the back of the darkened area. Swiftly moving to them, I threw my arms around Dagonet's shoulders, which were at the perfect height as he remained sitting and simply hugged me and rubbed my back while I kissed his cheek with a bright smile.
"I was so worried!" I told him making him smile softly with heavy eyes.
"And what of my welcoming Dawn? I believe we had discussed this earlier." Gawain said teasingly making me smile and hug him with a loud kiss on his cheek much to his amusement.
When I pulled away I saw Bors greeting Vanora enthusiastically, so much so that it had even the most callous of barmaids looking away with a soft blush on their cheeks.
"And what of me sister, shall I be left in the darkened cold?" Lancelot asked teasingly.
My eyes became slightly misty at his term of endearment for me but I wasn't surprised compared to the others who looked on with wide eyes as I pulled him in for a large hug, conveying my happiness to him over what he had referred to me as.
"Sister?" I heard Gawain distantly ask confused but I pulled away from Lancelot while he pressed a kiss to my forehead and went off in search of Evelyn for the night with a prowling smile on his face.
I turned and saw Galahad waiting expectantly making me color a bit before I pressed a swift kiss to his cheek and gave an even swifter hug that left both my lips and body burning where I had made such short contact with him, much to his obvious disappointment.
"Come, let us drink tonight's worries away!" Gawain all but roared and with that, goblets were flowing into the wee-hours of the morning.
A/N: I don't own the song "Pick up the Pieces" by Alexz Johnson
Chapter Twelve: This Kiss, This Kiss
It was a few nights later when I lying in bed asleep that a loud clap of thunder and flash of lightening had me sitting straight up in bed with a large gasp. I was never very fond of loud noises, too many memories attached with death and destruction for my liking. It wasn't helping either that memories of crawling in bed beside my mom were rushing back to the forefront of my mind.
Another loud crash had me yelping and jumping in my bed before I decided enough was enough and rushed out of my room. I went to knock on Lancelot's door to ask if I could bunk with him but before I could raise my knuckles and knock, the sound of a low female moan came through followed by a male grunt and movement of a bed,
"Ohhh…Lancelot." A breathy voice cried out followed by Lancelot's growl,
"Evelyn."
The sound of something sounding like a headboard hitting quickly and roughly against the wall had me squelching back a gasp and giggle while I moved on down the doors, her shriek of pleasure echoing down the hall.
Deciding that I would rather not risk the end of Tristan's blade for asking if I could sleep with him, I went to Dagonet's room but found it empty after opening the door when my knock wasn't answered. Bors was with Vanora and their herd of children and as much as Arthur and I got along, I decided it would be about as awkward as asking Angel if I could stay with him for the night.
Sighing, my last hope came upon Gawain's door as I knocked on it hurriedly when another loud clap of thunder seemed to shake the entire building we were all staying in. It was, however, the door across the hall from it that opened and Galahad's voice quietly said,
"Gawain's sleeping off his wine in the stables tonight. What are you doing so late at night?"
Turning around I was incapable of not gawking at the site of a bare-chested Knight leaning against the doorframe in front of me with the light from the night and lightening illuminating his skin…showing the grooves, dips, and outlines of his muscles.
"I…uh…the…uhm…" I stuttered not able to leave my eyes from his chest for too long making him slowly grin at me wolfishly and ask teasingly,
"I wonder, if I pulled on my tunic would the art of speaking come back to you?"
Able to glare now I was about to retort when a roar of the weather outside had me jumping and half-screeching before I was able to cover my mouth instantly concerning the Knight in front of me.
"Does the weather frighten you?" He asked and I was pleased to note there wasn't a trace of teasing or belittling in his tone.
Slowly nodding with wide eyes as I let my hands wring my night-dress I finally managed to push my pride aside and ask him quietly,
"Can I stay with you tonight? I'll sleep on the floor or something but I just don't like being alone in that room with the…" I began to babble nervously but he took two strides forward and pulled my shaking hands, for more than just the weather outside, into his larger and warmer hands and told me just as quietly,
"Come, we'll wake the others should we stay out here in the halls."
I could only follow him with wide eyes into his room, watching with fascination the way his back muscles moved with every step he took and even more so when he pushed the door open further for me.
"Thanks." I whispered passing by him and into the surprisingly neat room with a few shirts and pants here or there and a stray weapon but other than that it looked similar to mine.
"The floor will be too cold during these months for either of us to sleep comfortably on." He told me climbing into his bed and scooting over to one side while I decided to bite back any remarks or other suggestions and just climbed in with another boom of thunder egging me on.
I was just about to attempt and look like I was falling asleep next to this man when the loudest clash of thunder of the night that felt like it was directly overhead caused the windows to rattle and me to instinctively grab on his arm and pull closer.
"Shhh…don't fear it."
He said softly next to me and took my shaking form into his arms as memories and images of the night The First had appeared in the image of my mother seemed to completely take over. I practically crawled into his embrace and tucked my head under his chin and held onto him tightly while he gently ran his hand up and down my back in a comforting manner…both of our bodies tingling and heating at the contact. When I finally looked up at him he was staring down at me in such an almost demanding way I couldn't look away from him.
"Thank you." I whispered noticing that our faces were extremely close together.
Bringing one hand up, he let his thumb trace over my eyebrows softly down my nose only to rub lightly over my lips making electric sparks jump up from every portion of my skin he touched all the while never letting his eyes leave mine. My mouth parted a bit and I saw his eyes darken while he let his hand roam to the back of my neck where he played with the hair there causing goose-bumps to line my skin instantly.
"You're exquisite." He whispered and I could feel his breath wash against my lips making me lean forward unconsciously.
I brought my hand up to rest on his arm that was wrapped behind my head and watched as he lowered his mouth to mine, gently pressing a kiss against the corner of my mouth making my eyes roll close at the flame that jumped up in the pit of my belly. He let his lips brush against my cheek before pulling back and pressing his lips slowly against mine while I pressed back, reveling in the feel of his lips against mine and the emotions that poured at from me at the connection.
"Galahad…" I all but moaned against his lips when he pulled back a bit so as I breathed out his name my lips brushed against his again…so smooth and tender I want to die. Taking control of the kiss, he brought my lower lip in-between his and brushes his tongue gently across it…memorizing the skin there making me tremble and squeeze his forearm in response to the landslide of sensations flowing through my body. How can something as simple as a first kiss feel like this…like we'd just invented a new way of touching lips to lips? Too many thoughts were whirling through my head as I swirled my lips around his and pulled back so we were both able to breathe while he clutched me to him, unwilling to let me go from his hold. The welcoming weight of him settled over me and pushed me deeper into the bed under me making me moan deep in my throat at the feel of him molding against me. My moan of approval had him shifting above me while he groaned against my neck before tilting my head back up to meet his.
Once more he let his lips take claim of mine, stilling as we both exalted in the feel of each other with hands running up and down new territories of bodies never felt. The feel of his body and muscles underneath my wandering fingers was even more wondrous that simply watching them move…he felt like delicious sin and salvation all at once. Lingering a moment longer, he pulled away producing a soft noise of protest for me as I reached for him to bring him back down over me.
"We must stop or I will be unable to." He warned me in a low husky voice while brushing a kiss across my forehead, a peck against my nose, and a slow heated kiss against the side of my jaw that had me panting and clutching to him in a low moan as all the wonderful feelings he was producing in me coiled low and deep in my stomach in blinding heat.
"Oh!" I gasped when I felt the wet heat of his tongue lap against the skin there added with a gentle nibble of his teeth and I heard myself beginning to softly beg him in a pant…for what I could only imagine but he pulled away and pressed his forehead against mine.
"Yeah, definitely need to stop." I breathed heavily making him smile and brush a tender but claiming kiss across my lips before pulling me back against his chest and into his arms while we both sighed and attempted to fan the heat that was blazing in each of our bodies.
"Sleep, I'll hold you till morning comes." He whispered making me melt against him with a large smile while I slowly let my eyes close in bliss but even in my peaceful dreams I couldn't escape the remembering feel of his hands blazing paths of fire against my skin with his lips as the air to ignite the flame inside of me.
I was adrift
On an ocean all alone
You came and rescued me
When I was far from home
A rush of love around my heart
Just as I fell apart
Nobody ever cared as much for me
Nobody's touched my heart and healed my pain
You've picked up the pieces
And put me back together again
Careful, we're fragile
And easily we break
In your arms I'm certain
Is all the love we'll make
A rush of love around my heart
Just as you take my hand
Nobody ever cared as much for me
Nobody's touched my heart and healed my pain
You've picked up the pieces
And put me back together
I'll write your name in stars across the sky
We'll drift away into each other's eyes
Yeah
Nobody ever cared as much for me
Nobody's touched my heart and healed my pain
You've picked up the pieces
And put me back together again
Chapter Thirteen: Morning Regrets?
I woke the next morning completely tangled in the arms of Galahad while my head lay resting on his bare chest, moving up and down with the movements of his breathing. Not quite sure how to act or rather react in this situation after last night, I gently untangled myself from him, bemoaning the loss of his warmth and strength that had wrapped around me like a large protecting blanket last night. Slipping silently out his door, I took one last lingering look at his form illuminated in early morning light, bit my lip tightly, and dashed back out into the hallway.
I didn't stop until I was leaned against a tree, letting the wind brush through my hair and style it at will while the cold seemed to seep deeper than just through my skin.
'Did he even feel what I felt last night or was I just convenient?' Questions like that were rushing through my mind and I was more than thankful when the presence of Vanora had me taking my mind off of such depressing thoughts.
"What in the name of the seven hells are you doing? You're going to catch your death out here! And in your sleeping gown no less!" She shrieked and began dragging me back towards the fort.
By the time we were finally back inside torch-lit hallways I had received a scolding worthy of Buffy's but stopped short upon seeing Galahad exiting his room with a rather stiff demeanor and slightly angered eyes. It was, however, when his eyes landed on mine that I realized his anger was directed at me while he strode heatedly over to me without acknowledging Vanora and said,
"We need to speak."
Gulping, I nodded my head and let him pull me back into his room while Vanora stood out in the hall with wide eyes and parted mouth, confusion washing over her face as the door shut soundly behind us and only the echoes of our once footsteps filled the air.
"So I guess 'morning' isn't going to work huh?" I asked him meekly while he paced in front of me making him stop and turn towards me sharply asking in the same tone,
"Was I wrong in presuming you returned the affections I feel for you?"
"What?" I asked with wide eyes and stood from my sitting position on the edge of his bed.
"I woke this morning, alone, and despite the amount of wine I drank last night I remember many things about last night. The main one, however, is that I didn't go to sleep in my room alone."
My face heated and while looking at the floor sheepishly I told him with a shrug,
"I wasn't sure you'd even want me around, so I left."
I watched as his shoes came into my line of sight and he drew my face up towards his with a gentle touch to the chin and asked confused,
"Why would you think such a thought?"
Sighing, I let my arms flap helplessly in the air and told him,
"We didn't really have a great start to begin with and I wasn't sure if you were really kissing me, or just kissing."
"There's a difference?" He asked with a way too cute scrunch of the nose.
"Yeah, if you were kissing me, then you were right along for the ride of 'wow' with me but if you were just kissing I didn't want to wake up feeling like a nameless face."
Realization covered his face and he smiled softly asking,
"You were afraid I'd regret my actions last night?"
"Well...yeah! I mean what would have happened if you had woken up, taken one look at me drooling on top of you and then…"
I was cut off when the familiar and tingly feel of his lips pressed swiftly against mine; silencing any other thoughts I was about to voice. Groaning against his lips, I wrapped my arms tightly around his neck and let my body meld against him, completely enjoying the feel of him reassuring me through the spectacular kiss. He pulled back and whispered,
"The only regret I felt while kissing you last night was that I hadn't done it sooner."
Smiling, I pulled him forcefully back down and conveyed my own feelings until we were both breathless and I was smiling goofily at him.
"I'd say we have definitely have some time to make up for then." I grinned.
He smirked down at me and was about to kiss me once more when the door opened and Lancelot's voice was heard with,
"Have you see Gawain…"
We both turned, me with a guiltily embarrassed look on my face and Galahad with a frustrated annoyed one as all signs of life left Lancelot's face with a drop when his eyes took in our rather compromising situation.
"Morning?" I tried meekly but slowly his eyes narrowed into slits and focused on Galahad while he took two menacing steps forward in his direction saying in a dark voice,
"If you've laid a finger on her in any single way…"
"Lancelot, it's alright, really! We were just talking about last night and then…"
"Last night?" He demanded angrily making me wince before telling him in an annoyed voice,
"Yeah, the storm was freaking me out so Galahad let me sleep with him because I didn't…"
Quickly Lancelot drew one of Galahad's swords that was lying on a chest across the room at the same time Galahad drew one that had been hanging over his bed.
"He required the use of your body for a moment's comfort!" Lancelot said stepping forward once more while Galahad put himself in-between him and I and began to square off.
"Whoa! So not in the undressed and boink-y way Mr. Perverted, I mean like he let me stay in his rooms so I would be able to get some sleep."
Another voice came in from behind with a sleepy,
"What's going on?"
We all turned and saw Gawain rubbing his eyes tiredly before he shook his head to clear his vision and then did it again when he saw the scene in front of him.
"What's happened?" He deadpanned.
"Galahad's been violating Dawn's trust and innocence!" Lancelot barked in a way only an overly-protective brother could.
"He did not!"
"I did no such thing!"
"Excuse me?"
Taking a step in the middle of the room I forced both swords to lower and clarified to Lancelot,
"Galahad and I are dating…courting…you know, whatever it means when a guy and a girl want some quality alone time, of the non-boink-y sort!" I added the last part to Lancelot's furious glare in Galahad's direction.
"Boink-y?" Gawain murmured confused from his position against the door.
Turning towards Lancelot I told him softly and eagerly,
"I think I really like him and I'd like it even more if he was in one piece for the day."
I could see him reluctantly caving in as I gave him trade-mark puppy-dog eyes and he told me gently,
"If this decision will make you happy than I accept your terms."
I smiled and threw my arms around his neck with a kiss to the cheek as he pointed the tip of the sword threateningly at Galahad and said,
"If you harm her in any way, I shall run you through."
Galahad muttered something about 'brother-hood' 'knights-in-arms' 'Sarmatian kin' and 'bloody witch' before he nodded his head and watched my pseudo-brother leave the room dragging a grinning Gawain behind him.
"And to think I would have died for him." Galahad said sourly with a shake of his head making me laugh and remind him,
"You've still got to get through Dagonet you know."
He moaned and dropped his head in his hands while sitting on the edge of his bed making me pout and ask teasingly,
"Am I not worth it?"
His head whipped up to mine and pulled me by the waist to stand in-between his legs as he told me with more conviction I'd head in a while,
"You're worth going through every bloody Saxon, Woad, and Roman if it's you who awaits me in the clearing."
My teasing façade dropped into that of one of shock and awe while I smiled tremulously up at him, took his face in my hands, and proceeded to kiss the breath away from him.
Surprisingly, Dagonet had taken it quite well with nothing more than a threatening look to Galahad and kiss on the head to me while he walked back towards the training fields all the while with Galahad telling me he was a grown man and didn't need permission to be with me.
"Relax, go fight, and I'll see you tonight." I told him with a playful smile and began to walk away but he pulled me back into the concave of his chest with my back pressed tightly against his chest making my heart flutter as his arms wrapped securely around me.
"Not a full day and you'll already giving me orders?" He questioned with a soft kiss to the back of my neck.
The combination of the kiss and feel of his voice against my ear had me going slack against him so he had to hold me up tightly.
"That's cheating." I whispered and felt his laughter rumble against my back.
Turning me around by the front of my dress, he pulled me up on my toes and gave me a lingering kiss that had me chasing his receding lips with my own much to his amusement.
"I'll see you tonight." He whispered and taking pity on me, and perhaps himself, he kissed me once more and strode back towards the training feels with Gawain coming up next to him with a slap on the back making me shake my head with a smile.
"Boys." I muttered and turned around with a sigh towards where I hoped Vanora might be so I could gush and squeal like the school-girl persona I was feeling.
Chapter Fourteen: Puddles of Pain
Three weeks later I sighed when I made it back to the counter with my feet aching and back screaming at me in protest.
"Why is it so busy in here tonight?" I asked Vanora who was wiping her face down with a rag next to me.
She simply shrugged her shoulders before whisking back out into the night with two pitchers of wine and a rag over her shoulder. Looking up as more people filtered into the tavern, I groaned and refilled my own pitchers before making me way through the bodies and weaving between tables and chairs.
Before I got very far, the Knights and Arthur came striding in with gear and weapons with Bors shouting out to Vanora that the flasks needed to be filled before they left.
"Where are you guys going?" I asked walking up to the men who were checking their weapons and armor.
"Woads attacked a neighboring village three nights ago, we need to go and see if there are any survivors." Arthur informed me while wrapping up some bread, meat, and cheese one of the barmaids handed him from beside me.
"How long will you be gone?" I asked worrying my lip while looking over at Galahad who was pulling on some of his leather straps to tighten his chest armor.
"A few days, we need to travel there to see what needs to be done and what can be done."
Deflating a bit, I nodded my head and brushed a kiss against his cheek before he left to go and ready his horse. Repeating the gesture with Dagonet after he had kissed my forehead, I whispered for him to be safe and watched as he and Tristan strode away with their filled flasks together but was surprised when Tristan looked back at me once and with a nod of his head turned around once more.
"Odd man." I murmured to myself with scrunched up eyebrows.
"Don't worry your pretty little head so Dawn." Lancelot whispered in my ear when he hugged me to him while ruffling up my hair and he gleefully skipped away when I was unable to reach forward and slug him in the arm.
"Watch yourself out there." I advised solemnly to Gawain who nodded his head and with a silent look and message to Galahad he followed Bors out who had ordered for me to watch over his lover and his 'herd' while they both took the remaining flasks and cloth-covered foods to the stables.
Looking up at Galahad sadly, he smiled and pulled me into his arms by my dress and whispered,
"I don't wish to leave with the memory of such a sad face staring back at me."
I couldn't help but smile at his words while resting my hands on his arms making my fingers look much smaller and more slender than I thought.
"I just don't like it when you leave, going off to play the whole hero thing."
He simply pressed me further against his chest and said,
"We're not heroes and you'll be welcoming us back before you can even begin to worry."
"I already am." I mumbled against his leather armor, trying to breathe in as much of his scent as I could.
Sighing, he pulled away and held my face in his hands and kissed my forehead softly while I clung to his shoulders, not wanting to let go of him or say goodbye to him again.
"Just, uh, come back, alright?" I asked him hesitantly.
Pulling me swiftly upwards he caught my lips with his in a passionately gentle kiss that had my toes curling inside my shoes as I now clung to him in fear of falling to the ground. The air around me swirled and twirled and all thoughts of what was going on just disappeared as the only thing that I could think about was how delightfully rough his beard was against my own softer face and the slightly salty taste of his lips as he tipped my head backwards to deepen it.
When he pulled away I kept my eyes closed and drew in deep pants of breath while lewd comments were being thrown our way that we took no notice of, just pressed our foreheads against each others.
"Kissing you like this makes it almost impossible to leave you." He told me before pulling away making me give a mewl of protest when I felt his body leaving mine.
"I must or I shall never go." He told me with a playful grin while I asked just as teasingly,
"And that's a bad thing…how?"
He just laughed and shook his head before he kissed my hand and turned around, striding out of the grounds making me sigh happily and grin at a simple thought that was flashing through my mind while I watched his body move with grace and strength; he was mine. Turning around feeling fully rejuvenated from tonight by his single kiss, I hopped back into work with a slight blush on my cheeks and bounce in my step much to Vanora's amusement.
The days in the absence of the nights seemed to go by as fast as the time spent researching for Giles with the Scooby gang...without Spike there to help and move it along a bit. Sighing as I poured a drink for another man on the fourth night, Vanora came up to me with a sympathetic look saying,
"They'll be back soon dearie, I promise you."
"I know, and I believe you but it doesn't help make the days pass any faster."
She smiled knowingly and walked away and just as I was about to refill three of the pitchers, a shocking jolt seemed to collide with me in a mid-air making me gasp and double over from the almost painful sensation it created.
"Ow." I moaned to myself before slowly standing back up, looking around in almost scared confusion while I looked down at myself to make sure I was still in one piece.
Shaking, I set the pitchers down on the wooden counter so I wouldn't drop them and was about to move out from behind the bar when another one hit me hard enough to send me back a few feet but this time I knew it was pain as I had to swallow back the loud groan that wanted to issue through my lips.
"Friggin' hell!" I hissed while holding onto my stomach and chest, the two parts that seemed to be throbbing the worse at this point.
"Milady?" A concerned voice asked from above me.
Looking up through my curtain of hair, I saw a Roman soldier holding his cup up but looking down at me in worry at my bent-over state.
"Just take the pitcher." I said in a pained whisper before beginning to move backwards but began swaying on the spot. My vision seemed to dance around a fire that was burning through my head instantly causing my body to break out in a sweat while I tried to grab onto a post to stable myself.
"Are you ill?" The man asked me once more.
"I'm fine." I told him before pushing away from the bar and hobbling back towards my rooms on shaky legs.
The pain was beginning to become unbearable and I found myself mentally praying for me to just be able to have cramps again instead of this ripping torture that almost felt like I was throwing myself back through the portal. Crying out when it began to intensify in a burn like state, I couldn't help but fall to my knees while my hands that broke my fall landed in a puddle, rippling the once clear reflection it had created of the night sky above.
"Help…" I whimpered with closed eyes hoping that someone…anyone would come along with the ability to take this away from me. Biting my teeth, I pushed myself up and opened my eyes only to stop suddenly at the redness that was swaying in the water now, illuminated by the torches lit overhead.
"What?" I asked confused and looked over my body to see if I had somehow begun to bleed but when the puddle began to still once more, my eyes widened in realization and I slowly lifted my eyes to the night sky only to see a red moon staring back down at me menacingly.
"No." I breathed out only to scream it out once more when the ripping sensation intensified so much that I wished for a sword to just start to carve myself out of my body.
Curling into my body, I laid in a fetal position on the dirty ground with tears running down my face and silent screams coming from my lips while I chanted a single name over and over in my head 'Merlin'.
It was when I felt like I would surely die that I suddenly felt coldness beneath my body and a wetness begin to enfold me while instead of the night noises of the tavern, soft noises of a forest echoed all around me.
"Don't fight it child." A familiar voice said from above me.
Letting my eyes unclench to open, I looked up in confusion at seeing Merlin staring down at me in a comforting manner.
"What did you do to me?" I asked him in a pained voice, crying out once more when another piece of me felt like it was ripping away.
"Be calm, do not resist this." He told me kneeling down before me and brushing back my hair as I was too weakened to push away from him.
It was at the moment that his fingertips touched the skin on my forehead that a cooling feeling traveled down my spine and I fell limp as a boneless heap at his feet on the forest floor.
Chapter Fifteen: Lost and Found
(Vanora's Point of View)
It had been days since I'd seen Dawn at the tavern that night and after searching every area of the fort and not finding sight of her, I knew something had gone terribly wrong.
"Are you sure you haven't seen her?" I asked one of the regular patrons of the tavern I passed by early that morning, frantically trying to find any news of her from others. Another shake of the head continued to help my hope crumble just as the sound of excited voices had me looking back to see Arthur and the Knights riding through the already closing gates into the middle of our arena.
"Thank the gods." I murmured to myself and hurried off in their direction.
Not stopping to excuse myself as I pushed and shoved my way through the people lining the streets trying to keep out of their way, I finally made myself known by grabbing onto Bors' arm desperately. I could feel him tense under my hand but when he turned his head sharply towards me he relaxed with a large smile on his face and pulled me into a deep kiss that would have had me melting against him had other matters not been on my mind.
"Now is not the time!" I scolded with a frown, pulling away from him and turning frantically towards Arthur.
"She's gone missing, no one's seen nor heard of her!" I told him, confusing him to no end but making him turn fully towards me nonetheless.
"Who's gone missing?"
"Dawn…" I whispered causing eyes to snap towards me in surprise.
"What?" Galahad demanded stalking forward towards us as the other Knights followed suit save Tristan who looked out curiously beyond the walls while sending his hawk into flight.
"I saw her three nights ago at the tavern but haven't seen her since! She disappeared from these walls, or I swear I would have found her by now."
"Do you speak of the lady that's just recently arrived?" A passing Roman soldier asked after listening in on the conversation, much to all of our aggravation.
"Yes, have you seen her?" I asked him eagerly.
"I saw her as well three nights ago but she seemed to be ill with something…" He began making Galahad rush forward and grab him by his front shaking him and demanding through clenched teeth and angry eyes,
"What do you speak of?"
"She was in pain, much pain, the last I saw she was moving off out of the tavern." He said quickly with his eyes widened making Galahad push him away and storm off towards his horse while the Roman quickly made his exit.
Lancelot's form tensed while he looked around the fort in sweeping moves, Dagonet simply went back to his horse and mounted it while Galahad was already kicking his horse back in the direction of the gates.
"Stay here with Bors and Gawain, I want this fort searched brick for brick until she's found." Arthur ordered with a clenched jaw while he too mounted his horse and took off in the direction of Dagonet and Galahad, Lancelot already following behind him. I believe I was the only one who instead was looking for Tristan, trying to find where the mysterious scout had gone off to.
(End Vanora's Point of View)
It was the feel of water running down the sides of my face that had me slowly opening my eyes and attempting to pull away from it until the painful bruise my body felt like told me to lie still. Opening my tired and heavy lids, I was surprised that I wasn't surprised to see it was Merlin sitting before me with a cloth in his hands and bowl of what looked like water at my side.
"What happened?" I croaked not fully turning to look at him.
"You felt what happened child, there's no need for my explanation." He responded and dipped the cloth back into the bowl.
Silence swirled around us and deciding to bite back my pride I finally asked him slightly fearfully,
"Is this just the beginning of what's going to happen to me? Because if so, I'd rather die than live through anymore of what happened to me last night if it's going to be a regular occurrence."
He smiled softly and finally turned my chin to look into his own boring eyes and said,
"You've received your powers, now you must know to control them. It will come to you piece by piece."
"Is it going to hurt?" I asked feeling like a child again.
"If you'd allow me to help, I could teach you for it to be less painful when it must happen." He said softly while finally letting his hand drop.
"But I won't." I finished the thought for both of us.
We continued staring at each other for some while until he finally stood from me and said,
"I was not the one who brought you to me three nights ago, it was you who sought me out and brought yourself to me."
Turning away from him when some part inside of me knew he was telling the truth I told him tonelessly,
"It won't happen again."
When he didn't respond for a while, I looked up and wasn't shocked to see that he was no longer standing before me and I was now alone in the forest with the pains of the night still with me and feeling even stronger than ever.
I had finally managed to bring myself into a standing position and was now hobbling around lost in the forest feeling funny inside like something was trying to crawl out of me. I couldn't explain the elation I felt inside of me when I heard the sound of a familiar hawk crying overhead letting me know that Tristan would be behind shortly.
"Thank God." I murmured and allowed myself to slide back down into the dirt weakly with a tree behind my slumped form for support.
As expected, I heard hooves coming nearer and nearer and when I finally looked up I saw Tristan peering down at me from his horse.
"I got a little lost." I told him with a shrug of my shoulders and was surprised when he let a small smile lift the corner of his lips.
He dismounted and came towards me, kneeling in front of me and observing me before asking,
"What happened?"
Sighing, I shook my head and told him disdainfully at all the events leading up to this point,
"You wouldn't believe me even if I tried to explain it to you."
Looking up, I locked eyes with him and he gave me a hardened look that without words demanded to know what happened to me three nights ago.
"Fine…Merlin told me I'd be getting some weird inky powers a few nights ago but of course he left out the fine print of just how bad it would hurt and then all of a sudden I was at his feet in the forest and fell unconscious from the pain of it all. I woke up like an hour ago but he already left and since then I've been wandering around the forest trying to find my way out like a friggin' rat after its cheese."
I was once again at a loss for words when instead of hightailing it back out of here, he wrapped his cloak around my shoulders making me whimper helplessly,
"I want to go home now please."
I felt completely mentally and physically drained not to mention fully freaked out that there were some new foreign powers running freely throughout my body that I was told I'd have no control over.
"Rest." He whispered while picking me up easily in his arms allowing me to lean my head against his neck before whispering sadly,
"I wanted to die that night it hurt so badly, I've only ever felt like that once in my entire life."
Neither of us was quite sure why it was him I was deciding to open up to about what happened but both of us weren't about to analyze it.
"He told me it's going to happen again unless I let him help me control it."
He stiffened against me while pulling me up onto the horse in front of him so my legs swung off to the side and I was cradled gently against him, too weak to do much else. He was silent while kicking his horse into a canter and I was happy to finally just be able to talk without someone trying to advise me or interpret why I was feeling a certain way.
"Tristan?" I finally asked him in a small voice making him look down at me briefly before letting his eyes run through the surroundings we were going through; ever the observant scout.
"I don't want to go through something like that again." I finally confessed in a soft whisper and this time his eyes remained locked on mine and he understood what I was trying to tell him. He nodded his head and finally opened his mouth telling me in a clipped voice that was familiar to me when coming from him,
"When it happens, find me."
I smiled slightly feeling a little bit more relieved before nodding my head and falling asleep lightly against his chest letting my body begin to naturally heal itself from what had happened and what would happen.
"Dawn…luv…wake-up." A familiar voice called out making me groan and slowly open my eyes to see four new faces staring down at me in concern but the first eyes I locked in on were Galahad's.
"Hi." I whispered slightly embarrassed when I realized I was still being cradled against Tristan who was helping me up into a better sitting position.
"What happened, why are you outside of the walls of the fort?" Lancelot asked almost angrily.
Before I could reply Galahad cut in with,
"Are you hurt? Did anyone hurt you?" I could tell he'd be more than willing to go back out on a hunt for the imagined perpetrators.
"No, I'm fine." I told them all meekly but Arthur was staring at me in a slightly suspicious manner.
"We need to move." Tristan finally broke through, handing me over to Galahad who at once pulled me into his arms and hugged me tightly to him with a large sigh.
"I thought of you often while I was away and to come back only to hear that you were missing I…" He trailed off and instead pulled my face in-between his hands and kissed the breath from me in a passionate claim until Lancelot broke through with a disturbed voice,
"You could at least wait until our backs are turned to ravage her Galahad."
Smiling, I turned and looked up towards Lancelot who squeezed my free hand before turning his horse around beside Arthur and with Tristan leading the way, already ahead, they kicked their way off towards the fort.
"We will hear what happened to you when we return." Dagonet told me sternly before leaning down over his horse and dropping a kiss on his head and pulled his horse around to take off after the other riders.
"I'm glad you're back, it was beginning to feel like it'd be months until I'd see you again." I said looking up into his bright green eyes with a large smile, finally feeling the effects of the magic's beginning to dull under his gaze and wrapped securely in his arms.
Giving me a softer kiss than before, he pulled me up against him so I was in his lap with my legs dangling on either side of his hips…not the most modest position but the position I found most wanting. I laughed and squealed against his lips as he kicked his horse into a run, still determined to keep his lips on mine in the most devious and captivating of ways.
Chapter Sixteen: Of Arms and Ale
A/N: MY INTERNET CONNECTION IS DOWN RIGHT NOW SO UPDATES ARE GOING TO BE A LITTLE DELAYED, I'M SOOOO SORRY!
"…so the horse got spooked, shot off, and I knocked my head on the rock until Tristan found me." I explained the Knights meekly, all the Knights, who had cornered me once we all returned to the fort. I was beyond thankful when all Tristan did was let his eyes flicker towards me without saying anything to my thought up excuse that had formed on the remainder of the ride home.
"I see no blood." Gawain murmured, tipping my head left to right in his hands making me bat him away gently.
"I said I knocked my head, not split my skull." I said attempting to use sarcastic humor and effectively making him grin.
"No more riding alone outside these walls. Times are not safe enough for such things." Dagonet told me sternly making me gulp and humbly nod my head in agreement.
"Thank the gods!" A voice shrieked making us all turn just as Vanora bowled into me with a tight hug while Lancelot widened his eyes and instantly took off at the sight of a rather frazzled Vanora.
My eyes widened some in surprise before I let my arms come around her and hugged her back before she pulled away some with tears in her eyes and croaked,
"Do you have any idea how worried I've been? All the thoughts of what could have happened to you?"
I opened my mouth to reply but before I could she went from sad to angry with,
"The next time you pull a stunt like this I'll run you through myself!"
My eyes snapped open in surprise and I took an involuntary step backwards just as a pleasant smile slowly crossed her face and she caressed my cheek saying happily,
"I'm glad to see you back and well dearie, wasn't the same without you even for simply three days."
With that she kissed my cheek, kissed Bors, and walked off leaving a few opened jaws and curious expressions behind her.
"It's got to be the pregnancy." I dead-panned making Bors mutter about me having no idea and following behind her much to our amusement.
"So, how'd the trip go?" I asked turning towards the Knights, not at all surprised to see that Tristan had already left with Arthur and Dagonet simply nodded goodbye before making his way towards the stables.
"That good huh?" I questioned to myself making Gawain laugh before giving his own good-byes and walked off towards the taverns.
"Come on, it couldn't of been that bad!" I exclaimed but Galahad just grinned and pulled me against him whispering against my lips,
"The thing furthest from my mind this moment is discussing with you the trivial journey we've been upon that's kept me away from you for so long."
Smiling innocently, I wrapped my arms around his neck and asked in an even more innocent voice,
"Why, what ever did you have in mind Sir Knight?"
Before his lips could touch mine, a hand on my upper arm pulling me back had us both looking up in surprise and frustration only to see Lancelot standing there grimly as he spoke harshly to Galahad with,
"I seem to have forgotten something."
With that, he pulled me back into his stride and began leading me towards the training area while gawked up at him and Galahad seemed to be frozen in the position I left him in with an angry heat slowly building in his eyes.
"What are you doing?" I asked him completely bewildered once he let his grip on my arm loosen but the angered stride he kept didn't let up.
"I was just in the stables moments ago and you know what I discovered?" He asked while pulling me into the said stables in front of me.
"Horses and a really bad smell?" I asked with a bright smile trying to get him to cheer up a bit.
Releasing me, he waved his arms around him and said as if I hadn't responded to him,
"I found all horses counted for, not one of them missing."
Realizing what he was getting at, I decided to try and play the innocent little girl and rushed forward saying with as much enthusiasm as I could while my heart began to pound in nervousness,
"You mean she found her way back?"
When all I got in response was deafening silence I slowly turned around to see him standing closer in front of him with his jaw clenched making me gulp a bit.
"First, you won't find any female horses in these stables, secondly, I spoke with Jols and apparently, no one had taken any of the horses out since we've been gone. In fact, they've all been in these very stables for the past three days."
Shifting my eyes nervously to look for an exit I was surprised and relieved when I heard Lancelot release a breath and stand in front of me, holding my arms in his hands while he asked softer than I've heard him speak,
"Tell me what happened."
A few seconds passed between us as just as I was about to open my mouth and form some sort of sentence, another voice cleared into the room with,
"Arthur asks for you."
Both our heads turned at once to find Tristan leaning against one of the stalls idly playing with one of his daggers. This time when Lancelot sighed it was one of frustration while he let his hands drop and told me determinedly,
"We will finish this tonight."
Dropping a kiss on my forehead, he strode out of the stables allowing me to finally collapse against the wooden pillars behind me. Without looking up I spoke solemnly with,
"He knows something's up."
I looked over to see him studying me intently but after everything that had happened I didn't have the energy to shift underneath his gaze.
"They all will." He finally said with an easy tone making my heart pick up its beat and instantly I asked,
"Are you going to tell them?"
He looked at me sharply and even without an expression I could tell I had offended him somehow unknowingly.
"No." He said firmly making me color a bit that I had actually asked this knight that question.
"Sorry, I didn't mean…" I began but he shook his off and using the most words I'd ever heard him use in my presence he told me,
"Tell them soon or they will not be as forgiving as I."
Watching him walk out of the stables, I closed my eyes and slowly slunk to the floor wondering just what the hell I was supposed to do.
"Cheers for the man who invented alcohol!" I yelled happily while holding my goblet up in the air before gulping down what was left of it amidst cheers from the tavern.
I decided to take after what all the other scoobies seemed to do in times of depression and that was drowning my sorrows and worries in alcohol…or rather lots and lots of disgusting tasting ale. After the third goblet or so my tongue had seemed to grow numb to the taste and I was now able to down the substance without gagging.
"What have we 'ere?" A familiar voice asked behind me.
Whirling around on unsteady legs I saw a few of the Knights behind me with raised eyebrows looking at me curiously.
"She's begun without us, I'm deeply wounded by such an act!" Gawain exclaimed before grabbing a goblet of his own from a passing tray and downing it in an attempt to catch up.
"Be careful Gawain!" I whispered to him loud enough for several tables over to hear me.
He looked at me in bewilderment while I waved a flaying hand on his shoulder and told him with seriousness,
"Some of these drinks have alcohol in them…you got to know how to pick them right."
I was surprised and literally thrown backwards when he and Bors threw their heads back and laughed. Shaking my head, I looked up and got a large goofy grin on my face when I saw Galahad standing in front of me.
"There you are! I've been looking for you! Here I mean…at the tavern where I am…and you weren't here, but look, there you are!"
Despite his concern over why I was now choosing to drink, a small smile lifted his lips and he shook his head in fondness while I grabbed another goblet and was about to throw it back when Lancelot took it from me and said softly,
"I think you've drunk enough for all of us combined Dawn."
Pouting prettily at him I said to him quite petulantly,
"I've seen all of you drink, I'm not even close."
Galahad laughed this time and drew me in close to his body saying,
"I've got something to show you, will you follow me?"
"You betchya!" I said enthusiastically reminding us both of the night on the hill.
A few minutes later we were walking up the stone steps of the fort or rather Galahad was practically carrying me as I was stumbling the entire way.
"Sheesh, where are you taking me to, china?" I asked him and was lucky he disregarded my comment to mere drunkenness.
"Almost there now." He told me before pulling me up the next step and out in front of him so I was pressed against the wall with my back pressed up against his chest.
"What?" I asked confused until he took my hand in his and pointed it upwards to a crystal for a night sky.
"Wow…" I breathed and watched in avid fascination how my breath mingled with the chill night air.
The moon was shining down luminously and I don't think I'd ever seen such bright stars overhead.
"It's beautiful." I whispered with a smile and contented sigh when he wrapped his arms tightly around me and leaned his chin on my shoulder.
"Why did you drink so much ale tonight?" He asked in a more demanding then curious way but still gentle all the same.
Closing my eyes and letting myself lean and melt against him I told him sadly,
"I was sad."
He peered around to look at my face and asked,
"What created this cheerlessness I see now?"
When I didn't answer, he slowly turned me around in his embrace and leaned one palm back against the wall behind me to stable the two of us as I was now wobbling extensively against him.
"I wish to help you, do you trust me?" He asked with furrowed eyebrows.
Smiling I nodded my head and told him,
"Yep, I trust you. I just can't tell you yet, okay?"
He took in a deep breath and leaned his forehead against mine whispering,
"I will wait until you are able then."
Quicker than a drunk person should move and much too coordinated, I hopped up and sat on the wall making Galahad spring forward and wrap his arms around me yelling,
"Dawn! What are you doing?"
Smiling at the perfect height we were in, I spread my legs and drew him in close before wrapping my arms around him tightly, not at all afraid of the rather large drop that awaited me below.
"Trusting you." I whispered and laid a kiss on the top of his head, absolutely loving the feel of being wrapped so tightly against him.
The tenseness he had earlier vanished instantly and he held onto me tighter, pulling me closer against him making me smile and say sleepily,
"Your arms are better than any ale I'll ever had. Like soft warm blankets…"
Had I been more alert and not about to pass out, I would have seen the multitude of wondrous emotions that crossed his face but as it were, I passed out against his shoulder in a blissful sleep.
Chapter Seventeen: Kiss me Deeply
Groaning as sunlight continually beat against my sore eyelids, I tried to roll over onto my side only to stop with a louder moan when the contents of my stomach rolled with me. I don't know how many times I had waken but each time I know I had seen the contents of my stomach in Technicolor before stumbling my way back into bed.
"Lie still." A gruff voice said from beside me making my eyes slowly open to see Dagonet easing down next to me on the bed with a goblet of something and another little jar.
"If that's any more alcohol I think I might just puke…again."
Brushing my hair back gently, I sighed in relief when he placed a wet cloth on my forehead and told me sternly,
"You shouldn't have drunk so much."
"I know, my stomach knows, my head knows, and the jackhammers going off in my head know!" I moaned and clutched at my stomach when another bout of queasiness came over me.
I watched as he crunched up some herbs and sprinkled them into the liquid inside the goblet before handing it to me.
"Drink, it will help." He said and helped me into a sitting position much to my reluctance while I gulped down the liquid while pinching my nose and it took all I had inside of me not to just have it all come back up again.
"Ugh! What was that?" I asked with a gasp while he took the goblet and set it back down.
He didn't reply and instead helped me to lie back down and rubbed some sort of ointment on the temples of my head while I whimpered in pain, mentally kicking myself for getting wasted last night.
"Galahad was worried for you when he brought you back in." He told me, flipping the cloth over so it was cooler on my heated skin.
"He brought me in?" I asked him confused while closing my eyes wishing I could just pass out again and wake up when I wasn't feeling like I had been put through spin cycle in our creaky old washing machine.
"You fell asleep last night." He explained making me moan in embarrassment much to his silent amusement.
"Thank you for taking care of me this morning." I finally whispered to him when he wetted down the cloth once more.
He just smiled and stood from the bed before telling me softly,
"Rest, I'll bring you food and drink for lunch."
Smiling bravely and not telling him that my entire stomach rolled at the thought, I closed my eyes and threw my arm over my eyes to do the best to block out the sunlight that was mercilessly poking through my curtains. It was what felt like an hour later when my door creaked back open, about five minutes after I had once again taken a ride on the porcelain express, and I heard Galahad's familiar voice come through with,
"Are you alright?"
Groaning and shooting him a glare making him chuckle, he eased down beside me on the bed on his side with his head propped up on his hand while he rubbed my side. His touch and soothing motions helped a bit and I sighed contentedly while moving closer to him.
"Are you mad at me?" I asked softly from beneath my lashes.
He gave me a confused look making me continue with,
"For being all unconscious-girl on you last night while getting completely drunk."
He just smiled and pressed a soft kiss to the part of my forehead that wasn't cloth-covered and told me,
"If you wish to drink, I'm not going to stop you, just know that next time I won't be as kind to you when morning comes."
"What do you mean?" I asked him confused, unable to scrunch my eyebrows because of my already pounding head.
"I shall wake you in the manner I've been woken by the others after a long night in the bottom of my goblet."
"And how's that?" I asked with a small smile.
"Bursting upon your room with noise loud enough to wake the dead."
Groaning at the thought, I allowed a few extended moments of discomfort and curled into his body mewling in happiness when he wrapped an arm loosely around me and began to rub my back softly, allowing our two bodies to meld together.
"Rest, I'll wake you when you need to eat."
Reaching up and kissing him softly on his neck, as it was as high as I could reach, I sighed and cuddled up against him before falling asleep in exhaustion and discomfort.
It was a few hours later when he roused me gently from my sleep and practically forced some broth down my throat before giving me a goblet of water.
"Are you feeling well again?" He asked gently while pushing my hair over my shoulder.
I was surprised when I realized I did feel quite a bit better and with a large smile I informed him of it before getting out of bed and stretching my body upwards like a cat much to his amusement.
"Lancelot is searching for you." He told me over his shoulder while leading me towards the door.
I froze and my eyes widened when I remembered exactly what Lancelot and I had last talked about but before I could back out of leaving my room, he took my hand gently in his and pulled me out in front of him into the chilly night sky. I received a few jests when we passed by a couple of the Knights but I stopped still when Lancelot came around the corner and picked up his speed when he caught sight of me.
"There you are, I was beginning to wonder if you had simply died in your sleep." He told me with a good-natured smile and soft ruffle to my head. Sighing and deciding to get it over with I asked quietly,
"I guess you want to finish our earlier conversation then?"
He shook his head with a smirk and pulled me against him for a hug, much to Galahad's vexation, and told me,
"Tristan gave me the details while you were…incapacitated."
"He did?" I asked surprised, looking up at him sharply.
He gave me a simple nod of his head and told me in a gentle tone,
"I apologize if I offended you earlier in the stables."
Shaking my head, I stood up and kissed his cheek before pulling away and told him,
"You were worried about me, I get it."
He just smiled and brushed my cheek before nodding his head to Galahad and walking away to what I presumed to be the tavern as usual.
"What happened in the stables?" Galahad asked coming up behind me.
"Oh, nothing, he was just upset over what happened." I replied with a shrug of my shoulders and went to continue walking forward until he gently took hold of my arm and brought me back to face him.
"You would tell me, is this true?" He asked making me furrow my brow in confusion.
"If there were secrets I not yet know, you would tell me?" He clarified and I felt my stomach drop to the ground and was pretty sure it matched my expression when he took a slight step backwards with a tense jaw.
"It's not secrets Galahad, it's just things that have happened that I'm not ready to talk about yet." I told him as gently as I could.
"But there are things I don't know about you?" He inquired.
"And I'm sure there are things that I don't know about you but that's what a relationship should be about…getting to know the person more and more each day."
Walking up to him and taking his hands in mine I said softly,
"I remember you said you'd wait until I was ready to talk about these things, do you still mean it?"
After a few tense moments of silence he finally sighed and pulled me tightly against his chest speaking with,
"If I push for more than you are ready to give know it's because I worry for you and care for you."
Smiling, I wrapped my arms around his back and breathed in the comforting scent of him; letting is just wash over and enfold me before I replied just as softly back with,
"I know, I've never been in a situation like this before."
"What do you mean?" He asked slightly confused and pulled a way a bit to look down at me.
"When a man actually returns my feelings, actually wants to be with me for me."
He seemed surprised at my meek confession before smiling widely and bringing my chin up so I was looking in his eyes before he told me,
"Then their stupidity shall be my fortune for you are more wondrous than any lady I've come across during my time on this land."
I smiled up brightly at him in complete amazement before rushing up onto my tip toes and crushing my lips against his much to his delighted surprise. A fraction of a second later and he was hauling me up against him and reaffirming what he spoke with his kiss while I clung to him, hanging on tightly for the wonderful ride. So many emotions flowed through me whenever he kissed me like this, pulled me against him in a desperate attempt to leave no standing room between our two bodies and it was if I was willingly being devoured by him. We pulled away breathlessly and rested foreheads while our chests rubbed against each other from the heavy breathing. My blood was running hot in my body while he roughly rubbed my back and stared at me with darkened eyes, his body moving against mine slightly in the most delectable of ways. Oh…what this man did to me.
Chapter Eighteen: Call of the Wild
"Keep moving…" A voice called while I sparred off with Lancelot a few days later in the training yard.
"Keep you guard up high!" Gawain called out and I raised my sword at the same time Lancelot came crashing down on it with a heavy blow of his own.
"Attack him, don't simply defend!" Bors yelled out while Dagonet circled around us, watching me move while I took the advice, spun around, and brought a swift upper-blow to a very stunned Lancelot who actually stumbled a bit when he deflected it.
"You're getting better." He said in surprise.
"Don't sound so shocked there Lancelot." I told him with a smirk while swinging my sword around waiting to see what the next move would be.
He grinned and I watched with fear as he withdrew his second sword and said,
"Good, then we can begin to truly practice."
Before I knew it he was swinging both swords at me and had I not been busily trying to defend myself I would have realized he was not hitting close enough to do damage, just enough so I would be able to try and guard myself. Before I knew it, he was walking me backwards around the ring until my back pressed against a firm chest and an arm came up to stop my sword from coming down one last time.
"You big bully!" I cried out angrily at Lancelot, who just chuckled and sheathed both of his swords saying,
"I've matters to discuss with Arthur so the others will have to attempt and defeat your prowess with the swords." He said teasingly and kissed my cheek before beginning to stride out of the training field.
Before I knew it, I picked up a dagger lying in the pile of weapons the Knights had brought out for the afternoon, and threw it before Galahad could realize what I was doing. We all watched agape as it made its mark in the post Lancelot was walking past, an inch from his head causing him to stop suddenly and slowly turn around. All eyes were on me at this point and deciding to cover up until I could figure out just what had happened I asked haughtily with a hand-covered hip jutted out,
"Oh didn't I tell you? I'm also good with daggers and other flying objects. Watch your head brother dearest."
This diffused the tension enough for the Knights, except two, to start laughing while Lancelot grinned boyishly, wrenched the dagger free and threw it back so it landed with a thud in the ground before my feet. With that he strode away while I turned quickly with the pretense of checking my sword but looked up in confusion and fear only to catch the eyes of Tristan who was in the shadows watching the scene intently.
"When have you been practicing such?" Galahad asked coming up beside me, amusement sketched on his face.
"Here or there, when I've got free time and stuff." I told him with a shrug of the shoulders causing him to laugh and pull me up to my feet and into his welcoming embrace into which I melted into with a happy sigh and silly smile.
"You continue to amaze me my lady." He whispered in my ear while Gawain and Bors roused themselves from the bench and began to spar and Dagonet helped to make sure my sword was still in tip-top condition.
"Come, we shall continue." He said gruffly with a look to Galahad who released me grudgingly and began to sharpen some arrow-tips.
The air around me was cold, almost cold enough to touch as my breath turned gray before ever leaving my mouth. Before me a silent scene played out of a young woman fighting against a Vampire in an oddly familiar cemetery. Long blonde hair and a lithe body let me know it was Buffy on her nightly patrols.
"Buffy…" I whispered in awe, watching with the same amount of respect as I always did as she skillfully battled the demon.
All noise was taken away and the only sounds that accompanied me were that of my heavy breathing and racing heart. I watched as she swept it to the ground before plunging the form of her stake into its heart, the dust of the vampire blowing out around her hair while she pushed herself gracefully to the ground.
Slowly, she turned around and our eyes locked…something ran through us both at that moment while I stood and walked towards her, meeting her in the middle. Smiling sadly, she brushed my hair away and laid a lingering kiss against my forehead, both of us closing our eyes and holding to each other. When I pulled away, however, it was my own blue eyes staring back into mine and my own long brown hair swirling around me making me pull away in confusion.
"You have to know when to receive." I whispered to myself and slowly she turned to the side to stare at something across the way. All noises rushed back to me so fast I thought I would be shoved backwards and I saw with wide eyes the body of my sister falling to the ground in darkness as I yelled for her. Rushing to her side, I pulled her lifeless body into my arms and stared down into her eyes that were now rolled shut.
"Buffy…" I whispered sadly before looking up sharply when her body completely disappeared from my sight. Glaring up at myself, I demanded,
"What are you trying to tell me?"
I smiled and knelt down next to me before taking my arm into my hand and drawing one long finger down the cut I made on my arm after finding out I was The Key.
"You have to know how to embrace it." I whispered and I looked down to see that somehow my cut had been reopened and blood was seeping from the wound.
I woke with a gasp and my heart thumping and quickly brought my arm up when I realized that my cut was throbbing with a dull pain.
"This is insane." I whispered into the darkness before climbing out of bed and pulling on one of my cloaks needing to get some fresh air.
The streets were practically empty with the exception of a few soldiers here or there but when I looked up into the night sky, my heart thumped happily at the familiar figure standing out on the wall. As quietly as I could, I made my way forward and up the long stairs, shivering from the cold that was seeping through the flimsy material of the cloth covering me.
"Couldn't sleep?" I asked once I was beside him.
He turned to me in surprise and stood to his full height asking,
"What are you doing out here, you must be freezing."
Smiling, I allowed him to pull me into his arms while he began to rub my skin in an attempt to warm me up.
"Just needed to clear my head I guess." I told him, sighing in comfort when I was able to curl my entire body against his. He held me securely against him and I was able to feel the soothing sound of his heartbeat underneath my frozen ear.
"Clear your head?" He asked confused making me laugh softly against his chest and tell him quietly,
"Be alone and think about things for a bit."
"Do you wish to be alone?" He asked beginning to pull away but I grabbed hold of him and told him with all sincerity,
"No, when I'm with you I don't feel like I have to think anymore. I like it."
He smiled and pressed a soft kiss against my cold lips and I moaned when they began to heat up under the pressure of his own. He pulled away and brought me back against him while I hugged him to me, allowing my eyes to drift shut in ease while I was being held in his arms.
"Do you wish to return to your rooms to warm yourself?" Galahad asked concerned when he realized just how flimsy the cloak was that I was wearing. Smiling a slow smile I told him as my breath fogged in the air next to his shoulder,
"No, I'm perfect where I am actually."
He simply tightened his arms around me in response and leaned against the wall, both of us staring up at the night sky with our arms wrapped tightly around each other and both of our troubled minds put at ease.
Chapter Nineteen: My Old Haunts
I had attempted to get in an afternoon nap after practicing once more and it wasn't even twenty minutes after I had laid my head down that a familiar pain began to whiz through my body.
"Oh God, not again." I whispered sitting straight up in the bed while clutching at my stomach attempting to hold what was to come at bay.
Groaning as it began to increase in intensity, I stumbled and fell onto my hands and knees on the wooden floor and cried out when it began to move through my body like water on an incoming wave...washing aside anything in its path. Gasping and managing to gather my strength, I picked myself up and hobbled out of my rooms making my way out into the fort desperately hoping that Tristan would be easily able to find. It was a good handful of excruciating steps later when I found my prayers were answered at the sight of him sparring with Gawain in the field alone, both of them covered in a fine sheen of sweat from their exertions. The feeling inside of me seemed to begin to throb causing me to grab onto a wooden post when another sharp pain swam through me while I yelled out with a hoarse desperation,
"Tristan!"
I dropped to my knees with a large gasp and vaguely saw him whip towards me but Gawain had already made a move with his sword and it made contact on Tristan's forearm sharply. Redness began to bloom on his sleeve but neither of them took any notice and instead moved towards me quickly.
"Help me…" I whispered when he was close.
Without waiting, he picked me up in his arms and strode out of the training field with Gawain following closely behind asking with concern,
"What's happened, is she alright?"
Tristan didn't answer him and instead when we reached different rooms, shut the door on him and barred it while I moaned and clutched at my stomach in pain. He sat me down on the floor with me resting against his chest so I was leaning my entire weight against him.
"Breathe and concentrate." He told me while I gritted my teeth and just began to beg him to kill me with nonsensical sentences; eyes squeezed shut tightly and teeth clenched even tighter against the agony.
"You must gather it." He said and began to press on a spot right below my spine that helped a bit to lessen the pain.
"Gather it?" I asked breathlessly while holding tightly to my sides.
"Bring to the surface, and let go." He said tonelessly as if we were discussing the weather outside.
Breathing in sharply, I closed my eyes and focused on the pain that was running wild through my body before flinging my head back against his shoulder and shook my head whimpering,
"I can't! It's too much!"
"You must." He said calmly which was ultimately the thing that had me closing my eyes once more while doing my best to hold back the cries of pain that wanted to be wrenched from my throat.
Breathing in deeply this time and trying to control my racing pulse, I tracked the path the pain was making, began to forge the path for it myself through my veins, and gasped when I felt it begin to center in the middle of my stomach.
"Something's happening." I said fearfully when I could feel it begin to bubble in the center and I began to fear if it would literally burst from my chest.
"Release it." He said pressing once more on the spot on my lower back.
When it began to become too much once more, I gripped his forearm tightly, his long cut forgotten, and with a large cry I began to mentally push it from my body clinging tightly to his forearms all the way through. It didn't hurt as much as I thought it would, merely felt like pieces of me were being emitted in short bursts of light behind my closed lids until I fell breathlessly back against his chest heavily, my hair matted to my forehead while my grip slowly began to lessen on his arms.
"That was…different." I breathed heavily but when I looked up at him I saw his eyes focused in on something else…his arm.
"What?" I asked, still unable to form complete sentences as I was trying to get used to this new energized feeling that was running through me.
"Look…" He said and pulled back his sleeve to reveal unmarred skin with blood still coated on top of it.
We both slowly locked eyes and I asked in a whisper,
"Did I do that?"
Before anything else could be said there was loud pounding on the door and Lancelot and Galahad were heard demanding for the door to be opened or else it would be broken down.
"Hang on!" I called out weakly, having to still hold onto him for support while he began to flex his arm around in amazement. I sat down heavily onto the edge of his bed since I wasn't able to fully stand on my own and watched him open the door to reveal Galahad, Dagonet, Lancelot, and Gawain rushing through.
"What happened?" Lancelot asked while Galahad and Dagonet moved quickly towards me.
Both of them began to check me over thoroughly while Gawain glared at Tristan, obviously still put out for the earlier shutting of the door he received.
"She was ill, I helped." He responded and with that, he grabbed a spare sword hanging from his wall and stalked out of the room…I could tell he was still feeling a bit uneasy about what I had done for his cut.
"I'm fine, I just needed his help is all." I said tiredly but Lancelot shook his head and said,
"You're too pale Dawn, what happened?"
I stood up quickly getting slightly angered at the mother hen routine and was about to lay into it when I began to sway on my feet and said in a whispered daze,
"Oh goodie."
With that, I hit the floor in a blackened state.
Across the wall and deep in the forest Merlin stood against a tree with a deepening frown on his face…he knew I was coming into my powers and without his help. Fears of what would happen should Arthur and his Knights use my strengths against him began to swirl around in his mind until a came to a grim conclusion. When I was fully into my power he would be no match for me and with it his people destroyed…unless I was to be killed first.
"I think she's waking up…"
"You said that quite a while ago."
"Well I think she's waking up again…"
Groaning at the voices and their growing volume I moaned out irritably,
"Either shut up or knock me out again."
There was light laughter and a strong calming hand running down my back before Galahad's familiar deep voice asked next to my ear,
"Are you feeling better love?"
Smiling softly at his term of endearment, I slowly opened my eyes and was tickled to see his own startling green eyes staring back deeply into mine. Bringing a hand up to his face, I traced the line of his strong jaw and whispered to him,
"I'm good now."
The men in the room all seemed to sigh in relief while Galahad let his eyes close and brought his hand up to cover mine that was still fascinated with the line of his jaw.
"I think some explanations might be appropriate." Arthur's voice cut in.
Surprised, I looked up to see the leader standing in the middle of the doorway with a look in his eyes that told me I was either in trouble or I was going to be. Dagonet came forward and took Galahad's place with placing a cold cloth on my forehead and brushing my hair back softly from my face.
"We heard you scream." He told me and I watched Lancelot and Galahad both clench their fists with the memory.
"Like Tristan said, I was in pain and he fixed it." I said as steadily as I could.
"What ailed you?" Arthur asked and continued on further into the room.
Adverting my eyes I didn't respond and instead held tightly onto Dagonet's arm for reassurance but sighed in defeat when I heard Arthur say in a more clipped voice,
"I wish to speak with the lady alone."
After some shuffling of feet and kisses to my forehead, cheek, and mouth, I was left alone in the room with Arthur standing before me looking rather imposing with only to candle light to show his outline.
"What do you need to talk to me about?" I asked and pulled myself up into a sitting position on the bed.
"Secrets aid none but destroy all, you know this?" He asked and instantly I could feel my body tense with what this conversation would be about.
"Some things are meant to be kept Arthur, until time allows something different."
"How are those who keep such secrets to be trusted in times like these? When friend and enemy wear the same masks and speak the same words."
Looking up at him I said softly,
"We all have secrets; some are too dark to bring out into the open though."
"Concealing and keeping have two separate makers, which are you charged with?" He finally asked causing the room to go into silence as we continued on staring at one another in a sort of stand-off defiance.
"There are things about me and my life I'm not ready to talk about yet. Can you understand that?"
"Not when it involves my men." He said firmly and turned to stare out the window.
Standing up and walking to his side I promised,
"I am not out to hurt them, they've become family to me and if you knew me you'd know family is the one thing I can put my entire self into."
"But can you trust entirely to reveal what came before that fated day in the forest?"
Turning away from him I told him slightly angrily,
"My past is my past and I don't feel like I owe anyone the pain of delving back into it."
"Your past haunts you, I can see so when you speak of it. How are you to put your entire self into a new family if you won't attempt to heal the wounds of your past?"
"There's nothing to heal, I'm dead there Arthur." I spoke knowing he wouldn't catch the double meaning behind my statement.
"We care for you, we wish for your ghosts to be banished from your eyes but we are unable to if you stand firm in your actions of hiding from us what it is you hope to shield from the world."
"There are some things I don't want people to know…not yet."
He looked at me but before anything else was said I put my arms around him in a firm but gentle hug and whispered with a tiny smile,
"It's good to know you care."
With that I kissed him on the cheek and walked out of the room amazed at how quickly the time would come when I'd have to start talking.
Chapter Twenty: Truths, Words, and a Pinnacle
When I walked back out of the room Galahad was waiting for me and instantly took me into his arms, holding me tightly against him.
"I never wish to hear you scream in such a way again." He admitted to me and I felt him tighten his arms around me.
"I didn't mean to scare you guys." I whispered against his chest and let my fingers fiddle with the loose tunic he was wearing.
Pulling back from me he searched my eyes and finally asked without breaking the eye-contact,
"What happened in that room?"
Swallowing and look down at the ground I said,
"I don't really want to talk about it right now. Can't you just be holding me while I try and take a nap again?"
I felt extremely weak at this moment but I just desperately needed the reassurance that Galahad was able to give me and found myself elated when he nodded his head and pulled me back against him.
"I wish for nothing more." He murmured against my head and kissed the crown of my head before leading me into his rooms.
"I've never felt so exhausted." I yawned and let him pull me into the middle of his bed while he wrapped his arms around me….pulling me tightly into the cocoon his body seemed to create especially for mine.
"Then you shall sleep well." He said and began to run his fingers lightly up and down the side of my body.
Curving my lips into a soft smile I told him,
"I sleep well whenever you're here with me."
Had I turned my head I would have seen his lips form into a proud smile but I simply let my heavy lids fall close with a cold sensation and held his arms around me with a content sigh.
When I woke our positions had shifted some and I realized Galahad decided to join me in a mid-afternoon nap with a pleased smile on my face. He had rolled onto his back and I remained tucked into his side with one leg thrown hazardously across his hip and my arm thrown across his chest, our limbs tangling and melting into one. The soft rise and fall of his chest moved my arm up and down and I couldn't help but squeal a bit internally at such a simple act.
I leaned over and kissed him softly on the mouth, surprised when his hand around my waist tightened and his lips responded sleepily against mine.
"Taking advantage of a resting man?" He asked groggily with a small smile.
Running my fingers over his lips I responded,
"Only of my sleeping man."
He chuckled and gave a deep sigh before pulling me completely on-top of him so we were lying chest-to-chest giving me the most amazing feeling of his entire body pressed against mine.
"Hello." I whispered when he finally opened his eyes and locked them on mine.
Grinning, he leaned forward and kissed my lips lightly before whispering back,
"Hello."
I laughed and was about to kiss him once more when he flipped us over so I was now on my back causing me to squeal in surprise. I laughed underneath him when I finally got my bearings about me but was surprised when his own eyes remained intense and heated.
"What?" I asked confused and breathless from my previous antics.
He ran his finger down the bridge of my nose and then underneath both my eyes before saying,
"I've never seen such captivating eyes before."
My cheeks heated slightly and I smiled softly at him before I took hold of his face and told him,
"I can say the same."
He gave me his own slow smile before letting his thumb rest against my bottom lip…brushing it back and forth softly as if it was the most amazing thing he'd ever done.
"So soft…" He whispered in slight wonder.
Smiling and closing my eyes, I pushed my cheek further into his touch loving the feel of his roughened fingertips against my own velvet skin. What he said next had my eyes snapping open in amazed emotion,
"When I'm with you, such as I am now, I no longer feel the chains a slave does of his master…I feel free once more."
My breathing increased while I stared at him with wide eyes unable to even comprehend the types of emotions that were running through my body at his statement. How could I possibly evoke those words and feelings from another man? How could this single man make me feel the things I was feeling? Something inside of me gave in the warmest way I'd felt in a while, and before I knew what I was saying, I whispered softly,
"I love you."
It was his turn to look at me in shock and when I finally realized what I said I snapped back to the non-fuzzy reality and told him quickly,
"I didn't say that to make you feel like you had to say it back, I just wanted you to know."
Before I could try and continue on with any more, his lips took mine as his and it felt as if something inside of him was trying to connect with something inside of me. Pressing myself closer to him with a low moan, I opened everything I had up to him and became even more breathless when I felt him fill the spaces up with his own love and care. Good God…
"Wow." I whispered when we pulled away from each other and rested our foreheads against one another's.
"I love you too." He told me and kissed me slowly before pulling away again to stare down at me with the widest smile I'd seen on him in a long time. My heart seemed to be skipping a perpetual beat of time at his words I replayed over and over in my head…he loved me!
"You make me feel like I'm not alone anymore…and I've felt alone my entire life." I said with glazed eyes while I let my fingers trace over the features of his face.
"You're not alone…ever." He said solidly.
I threw my arms around him and pulled me tightly to me loving the feel of his full weight covering me and anchoring me deep into the bed.
"There's so much I want to tell you…" I whispered into his ear and felt him tense slightly.
"But you aren't ready to and I understand." He finished for me with a questioning note at the end.
Pulling slowly away from him, I pressed my hands against the sides of his face and breathed,
"I'm ready."
His eyes widened in surprise but I could feel his body relax back against mine until I told him,
"There're things about me, about my past, that you aren't going to like or understand. Hell, there are things about me now that you won't like or understand but I want to tell you anyways."
"Are you sure?" He asked while brushing hair off my forehead away softly.
"I don't think there's ever been someone I can trust as much as I trust you but I can't be complete with you unless you know a few truths. I don't want what we have to be something built on lies or evaded truths…I want you to know everything there is about me."
He slowly and cautiously nodded his head and we both sat up to face each other on the bed while I took a deep breath to gather my courage and began with,
"My sister's the slayer…"
The candle by my bedside was almost nearly entirely melted down when I finally closed my mouth and sat on the bed staring up at Galahad who was leaning his back against my window with his arms crossed over his chest and an unreadable look on his face.
"Say something." I whispered desperately, not at all liking the stony silence.
"I've no idea what to speak of." He told me honestly obviously trying to still soak everything in.
"What are you thinking then?" I continued to prod.
He remained silent for a few more sweat-producing minutes before asking,
"So then…are you not real?"
I visibly flinched at his question and turned my head away so he wouldn't see the pain radiating through my eyes at him. Taking another deep breath I told him in a low voice,
"If you mean 'real' in the sense that I was born from my mother and father and raised like a child then no, I'm not real. But I'm real like every other person on this earth is real…I sweat, cry, laugh, bleed, feel pain, happiness, and sadness, and…love."
We both looked at each other at my last declaration until he asked,
"But yet you came to us dead, did you not?"
I sucked in a soft breath and stood so I would stop fidgeting and told him,
"I sacrificed my life for others…yes."
Turning and seeing the look in his eyes I sighed in defeat telling him softly,
"I understand if this totally freaks you out and you don't want to be with me anymore, I mean it's a whole lot to take in and process."
His head whipped up at mine and his eyes became intense while he quickly moved forward towards me and took my shoulders saying with so much feeling it almost knocked me over,
"I feel you Dawn…I feel your heat beneath my fingers, I feel the way you make my chest beat faster, the way my body yearns to be next to yours, the manner in which your chin fits perfectly against my neck. I smell the lavender in your hair whenever I hold you as such, the feel of your skin against mine…you are real because you make me feel more alive than I've felt since arriving at this damnable island."
Tears were running silently down my face as I was unable to speak but he continued on with,
"I care not that your past holds such darkness as the one you've described to me nor that any of it makes certain sense."
Laughing with a slight choke at that produced a smile from him before he pulled my shaking form against him and said,
"There is one thing that remains clear to me…as you were once a key of light to your people, you've now been brought to me to become mine. Here." I sobbed slightly when he placed both our hands over his heart.
"I'm so appreciative and pleased that you've shared with me your secrets and I know that you might continue to educate me more of your past along the way but I'm content to lay the stones of our own path…together."
I began placing kisses all along the exposed skin his loose tunic still left bare and soon he groaned and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me up against him and whispered huskily against my ear,
"We'll speak more of it on the morrow. Right now, no words created by man exist that are needed to express what I wish to convey to you."
Nodding my head and frantically clinging to him with so much emotion in me I thought I'd burst I pulled his tunic up over his head and ran my hands over his firm chest while he lowered me down onto the bed beneath him. Turning his head, he leaned up a bit and blew the candle out before lowering back down on me and taking my lips in a fiery kiss that began the heated blood coursing through both of our bodies.
Chapter Twenty-One: Coital Bliss…?
Sunlight pestering my closed eyelids had me slowly opening them one at time attempting to get my wits about myself when I sighed happily at the feel of a heavy weight across my waist while I was curled on my side. Craning my head over my neck, I smiled at the sight of Galahad's sleeping face and ruffled hair behind me and realized it was his arm that had such a tight grip on my body. Memories from the night before came back to me and had my body heating up once more as I remembered exactly what his body could do to mine in the most pleasant of ways.
"Oh…" I groaned when I felt myself beginning to heat up and pushed my face into the pillow beneath the side of my face. The movements seemed to wake up Galahad who reflexively tightened his arm around me and when he moved closer my eyes fell shut at the feel of his hardened state in the morning against the small of my back.
"Good morning." He whispered in a husky voice next to my ear before he pressed a soft kiss to the side of my jaw.
"Morning." I responded and turned over in his arms until I could feel him against my belly while his eyes roamed my naked torso appreciatively.
"How do you feel?" He asked running a hand down the side of my bare arm that was thrown across his own waist.
I just grinned devilishly at him and pressed myself closer causing his eyes to darken and his grip on my skin to tighten. Running my hand down his collar-bone, I let my eyes follow its track until it slid below the blanket and I pressed my palm flat against his navel before continuing on downwards. When I reached my mark his eyes became black and within the space of a heart-beat he had me on my back beneath him once more while I wrapped my arms and limb tightly around him, feeling the tenseness of his muscles.
"You try my control wench…early this morning as it is." He teased playful with a nip to my collarbone that had me arching against him.
"After last night I don't think I'll ever stop either." I grinned and rubbed myself sensually against his body causing us both to groan softly.
"I've training that must get done." He breathed regretfully against my lips before softly running the tip of his tongue along the center of my bottom lip while I could feel him growing even more against my skin.
"We've got training to get done here as well…in bed." I replied and captured his lips briefly until he pulled back and finally lowered himself fully on top of me where I was able to press my entire self against him.
"You've ruined me for any other." He said while pressing biting kisses to the side of my neck.
Clutching to his back with a gasp as coiled heat built in my stomach at his actions, I whimpered and pleaded,
"Please…I need you."
He groaned and tightened his hold on me at my words but any more torture was ended when with a quick thrust of his hips he was sheathed inside of me again.
Ten minutes later we were breathing heavily against each other, collapsed on the bed with satisfied smiles on both of our faces.
"If I'd known that would've happened after I told you about my life…I would have done it years ago." I said breathlessly.
He just smirked and turned to look at me, brushing sweaty hair off my forehead while telling me seriously,
"There is still much to be understood yet about your past, you know I will wish for explanations as we continue on."
Smiling and turning my head to look at him my breath caught in my throat at the absolute gorgeous picture he created. Bright green eyes peering down at me with a mop of dark brown hair flopped over his forehead and into his eyes. The blankets from the bed had slung down low enough on his waist that I could see the V shape his body made where his groin met his legs. A slight dust of perspiration created a sheen on his skin effectively outlining the muscles underneath…and suddenly I felt like I was in a dirty romance novel.
"What is it?" He asked, noticing my intense stare.
Smiling shyly I shrugged my shoulders and told him bashfully,
"I don't know…guess I just can't believe you're mine."
His lips spread into a smile and he pulled me up against him all but growling against my lips playfully,
"All yours if I've any say in the matter."
Kissing his lips softly I asked,
"Didn't you say you had some training to get done?"
He groaned and let his head fall to my shoulder before biting at the skin there gently and rising from the bed saying,
"Yes, and I'm a little behind now."
I just grinned at the reproving look he sent over his shoulder knowing that he would have initiated it seconds after I had if I didn't when we both woke up. I watched with rapt interest as he stood naked from the bed and stretched out his limbs causing my mouth to water as I watched his skin move over the muscles hidden underneath. He pulled on some trousers and a loose black tunic before sitting back down and grabbing some leather boots strewn across his floors.
"I shall find you later in the day." He whispered and hovered over me before pressing a hard kiss to lips that had my head reeling when he lifted himself off of me. Before he left the room he cast a long look over his shoulder making me asking curiously,
"What?"
He grinned devilishly and with a heated look up and down my body he told me in a deeper voice than seconds ago,
"The sight of you in my bed and sheets is more than alluring. I just pray to the gods that the scenery doesn't change later tonight."
My cheeks flushed a bit at his suggestive tone that had him laughing in fondness before he gave me one last smile and closed the door behind himself. When I was sure he was no longer in hearing range I flopped back down on his bed with a loud squeal and yelled,
"All mine!"
After another long nap I finally emerged from his rooms and walked towards the tavern to find Vanora and a bit of food but was pleasantly surprised when she met me on the streets.
"There you are, I've been looking for you!" She exclaimed and rushed up to me but stopped short and looked at me with a cocked head.
"What? Am I trailing toilet paper or something?" I asked looking over my shoulder not catching the confused look she sent me at my question.
When I turned back around to face her I watched as her face suddenly seemed to brighten up with her eyebrows raised slowly and a large smile beginning to cover her face.
"Why are you looking at me like that?" I asked hesitantly.
Taking my hands in hers she led me a bit out of the busy street and exclaimed,
"You and Galahad have bedded!"
My eyes widened in horror but before I could begin to ask how the hell she knew that she scoffed and said in a sterner voice,
"Please dearie, I've had ten children and to be eleven soon. I know such things."
I couldn't help but grin and nodded my head making her laugh softly until I grabbed her arms and said desperately,
"You can't say anything! I don't even want to think what Dagonet or Lancelot would do if they found out."
We both turned to walk out together while she promised secrecy and asked slyly,
"Was it what you wished for?"
I just smiled widely and nodded my head vigorously causing her to chuckle loudly and exclaim,
"Careful dearie, pretty soon you'll be ending up like me!"
My head felt like it lost all blood while I stopped instantly in my tracks and stared in horror ahead of me, my eyes unfocused but my mouth dropped open slightly.
"Dawn? What's the matter?" She asked concerned and touched my shoulder.
Grabbing onto her dress sleeve I said hurriedly,
"I didn't…I mean I'm not on…we didn't. Vanora, what if I get pregnant?"
She seemed to realize what I was talking about and calmed me by gently saying,
"Calm yourself luv, we'll go to the village mid-wife and she can give you some herbs."
Breathing came back to me slowly and while she guided me down the streets telling me that all would be fine I couldn't help but wonder if I'd soon be introducing Dagonet to a grandchild in nine months or not…oh boy.
Chapter Twenty-Two: Innocent Blood
By the time Galahad finally came and found me it was almost dark and I was working heavily in the tavern trying to take my mind off of Vanora's and my earlier discussion.
"Sorry love." He whispered with a kiss to my head when he walked in not needing to remind me that our earlier morning escapades had forced him a bit behind in his schedule.
"Guys want something to drink?" I asked the Knights that came in to their usual table, receiving a few affirmative nods while Lancelot came up and took my arms in his hands…looking at me carefully.
"Do you feel well tonight?" He asked concerned with his brow furrowed a bit.
Smiling and nodding my head, I kissed his cheek and told him,
"Yep, perfectly fine, just needed a bit of sleep and I'm as good as new."
"Sleep isn't all you required." Gawain mumbled with a smirk causing Galahad to turn and glare harshly at him which triggered my own glare while I pulled away from Lancelot.
"You told him?" I asked with a mortified blush on my cheek.
Gawain stood up slightly wobbly, clearly he had began drinking earlier today, and said with a shake of his head and point of his finger while clearing his throat,
"Walls are thinner than you'd think."
My eyes widened making Galahad push Gawain back down onto the bench while Lancelot and Bors, the other two present, stared at us in confusion.
"What the bloody hell you three on about?" Bors asked taking a large chug out of his own goblet I handed him.
"Nothing!" I said quickly and turned on my heel striding back to the counter wondering just how I was ever going to face Gawain again without turning as red as a stop-sign. However before I could begin in self-mortification pity, gentle hands on my shoulders pulled me back into a familiarly warm chest while a sigh blew back a few strands of hair close to my temple.
"He's drunk himself this afternoon, he didn't mean to offend you." Galahad assured me and turned me around to hold me against him softly.
"Yeah, but he heard things last night that weren't meant to be heard by others." I pointed out fidgeting slightly under his stare.
"What happened between you and I last night can't be tainted by one man's words…so don't let it." He replied and pulled me up for a soft kiss making me sigh against his lips and wrap my arms tightly around his neck.
"At it again are we?" Gawain called from across the yard making me pull swiftly away from Galahad and whirl around with a low growl.
"He's so dead." I said flatly and was about to stomp over to him when Galahad wrapped his arms tightly around me and whispered huskily in my ear,
"Don't waste your energy on Gawain as I can find more productive means for it."
I melted back against him when he bit down softly on my earlobe as I sighed submissively,
"Okay."
I could hear him chuckle and felt it vibrate through the thin material of my dress just causing my body to thrum more at the prospect of what was to come until the remembrance of what I was trying to take my mind off of came to me full force.
"No! We can't!"
I shoved away from him causing him to stare down at me in confusion while I shook my head wildly and held him at arms' length.
"Why? What's wrong?" He asked trying to pull me back to him but I continued to pull away, as difficult as it was proving to be.
"I've got to get a few things first." I said walking backwards as he continued to step forward towards me.
"Those would be?" He asked smirking slightly as I continually stepped away from him.
"Provisions." I answered meekly avoiding his gaze.
He raised an eyebrow at me as I felt my back hit hard wall behind me causing me to gasp and stumble a bit while he continued forward until I extended my arms all the way out and kept my hands on his chest to keep him back.
"Please, for the love of everything good and right in this world you'll keep your distance because this resolve thing I'm trying to do here, it doesn't work quite as well as I hope when you're too close."
His smirk broadened and he continued stepping forward until my arms were forced to bend and press completely against his chest.
"Yes, well, I don't work quite as well if I'm not close to you." He whispered and brushed his lips lazily against mine while I fought desperately to hold onto my control despite the fact that my body was reacting happily to his.
It was when he bent his head and began to run his lips up and down the sensitive skin on the column of my neck that I finally yelped,
"What if I get pregnant?"
He stopped slowly and pulled away even slower to look me in the eyes closely, silently asking me to continue on with my statement which I did with a sigh of,
"I'm not taking any herbs or anything and until I get them, I don't think we should take any risks."
Pulling back a bit he asked slightly guarded,
"You wish not to have children with me?"
My eyes widened at the last thing I expected to come out of his mouth and for a few tense moments we stood staring at each other, each of us with thoughts buzzing around our heads.
"I don't not want to have kids with you Galahad, but I mean…we're not even married yet. Not that I'm thinking about marrying you or anything to be taken as an animated ball and chain…not that I don't want to marry you. I mean I love you, of course I'd love to be married to you. Someday that is, not right now so you don't need to get freaked out…" my long winded, and hesitant, speech was cut off as he slowly bent his head down and kept his lips so close to mine that when he spoke next, they occasionally brushed against my own.
"I don't fear the thought of having you as my wife. I could wish for nothing more."
It felt like my heart stopped beating as I began to wonder just exactly what this conversation was going to lead to but wasn't able to think upon it anymore as he continued with,
"Someday that is. As of now I'm content with just having you as I do."
I smiled and pressed my lips against his leisurely, kissing him slowly until we both pulled away with heavy breathing when we realized we either had to stop now or…
"Perhaps I should return and leave you to return to your rooms tonight?" He suggested to which I nodded my head frantically and replied,
"Yes, that'd probably be the more genius thing to do right now."
He didn't ask anything more but left me with a kiss to the temple before striding back off into the middle of the tavern as I attempted to catch my breath. Highly unlikely.
Later that afternoon everything seemed to change in just a few minutes. I was practicing with my sword work when I heard a bellowing cry coming from the wall with,
"WOADS!"
Shocked, I looked up and ran forward to the wall, racing up the steps with Lancelot and Galahad coming in from another direction behind me.
"Arthur! What's going on?" I asked rushing forward only to stare out in horror at the sight of Woads rushing out from the protective trees on towards the defenseless people out front hurrying to try and make it back to the gates.
"Mount up!" Arthur all but growled angrily and I followed behind them, covered by the chaos going on around us that no one took real notice.
"Van! Van!" I heard Bors crying out making me spin around and see Bors shouting frantically for her lover.
Sucking in a breath I looked around panicky as well, praying to see a mop of red hair but in my quick moments of intense concentration for her, I felt like I was suddenly pulled from my body and found myself standing out on the field where the Woads were attacking and saw Vanora wobbling her best up the hill with more than a few men yelling out from behind her, brandishing their swords violently.
"NO!" I cried out and went to help but I was suddenly pulled forward and was standing back in my spot at the fort.
"VANORA!" I screamed catching all the men's attention but I didn't answer any questions and instead grabbed one of the horses Jols had brought out quickly upon order and jumping up on it barebacked, I spurred the horse into motion.
"DAWN!" Voices cried out as I rushed forward through the gates.
The pounding in my heart increased ten-fold at the thought of the body of Vanora lying on the hill I was about to crest over. Leaning down closer on the horse, holding onto it's mane of hair I whispered silently almost to myself,
"Faster…go faster."
I don't know if it was just my hopeful imagination or something different, but suddenly it felt as if the horse beneath me was moving swifter and sounder than when it had been at full run through the gates out into the open. Looking up as I heard the cries and swinging of metal against metal I looked to the spot I had been pulled to and sure enough Vanora was making her way towards me with wild and frightened eyes.
"Vanora!" I yelled out over the noise, urging the horse faster silently, and dodging bodies or people running back to the fort by guiding the horse with my knees as I wielded my blade against attacking Woads while I rode by.
Relief drenched her features when she caught sight of my riding swiftly towards her and with speed and grace I didn't possess, I flipped and pushed of the horse in a wide arc with my legs straightened and coming overtop of my folded body, arms and blade outstretched until I landed in a crouch beside her. With a swift upswing, I blocked a blow intended for her stomach before deftly kicking him in the stomach and then a round-house kick to his jaw that packed more power than I was used to.
"Thank the gods, we've got to get out of here!" She cried out and tried to pull me forward in her run but I whistled for the horse and helped her onto it.
"Go! I've got to help!" I said and when she was about to protest I urged the horse forward with a whispered word, still concentrating on everything else around me, not taking in what I was making able to happen. The horse shot off and Vanora was only able to hang on as she made her way swiftly to safety, calling my name the entire way.
Whirling around to survey what was going on, I spotted a few Woads advancing on an elderly man making his way as best he could with a limp up the hill.
"Bastards." I hissed feeling my entire body come aflame with anger I had no idea I could possess.
Running forward, I swept the legs out of one and as his back hit the floor I brought my sword up and plunged it into his stomach, not giving him a change to gurgle his pain as I decapitated him just as quickly. The fact that these men, and a few women, were still human was no longer present in my mind; they simply were now just as bad as demons…animals.
Ducking another sword, I spun around and imbedded my sword into his chest with an expert twirl of the sword behind me, feeling an unnatural strength filling me up as I moved swifter, not listening to the old man thank me and instead told him to hurry back up to the fort.
I looked up when I saw Arthur, the Knights, and Roman soldiers riding into battle while I began a series of kicks and flips that would have made Buffy stop and look on in awe. A lone dagger on the grass got caught in my hand as I did a flip over the head of one Woad and he wasn't even able to turn fully around to face me when the dagger found itself a new home in his neck.
I looked around me, eager and bloodthirsty, for another fight but saw most of them running back to the forest or being killed off by the men behind me allowing me to finally look around and see all the bodies of the innocent littered on the floor that weren't able to make it in time.
"Dawn?" Galahad asked in shock after seeing my display.
My eyes weren't on him though as they traveled across the way and soon my body followed, stopping and kneeling down at the side of the elderly man I had saved earlier with an axe lodged in his back. Galahad put a reassuring hand on my back while Lancelot came forward, his voice muted but his lips moving as he demanded to know what I had been thinking with a furious look on his face. The only thing that I could hear was the speeding up of my heart as my rage seemed to increase.
"These were innocent men." I hissed out between clenched teeth, my fists tightening as I whirled around and took two steps forward towards the forest, not even thinking as I concentrated even more until I was sure I had located the spot Merlin was standing in. My rage and hate boiled over as I could feel his eyes connect with mine even through all this distance and before I knew it, I bowed over and let loose a thunderous yell that made all the men save the Knights and Arthur take a hesitant step backwards as the sky darkened overhead and thunder echoed along with my scream.
"Dawn!" Galahad cried out worried but soon the ground beneath us seemed to tremble as well with my anger as I continued to scream out at Merlin, my hands out in his direction and when I was able to make the tree he was standing under shake just a bit, I collapsed onto my knees breathing harsher and my sword next to my side.
"It hurts…all this pain and death." I whispered to no one realizing that my onslaught of emotions was coming from the bodies around me and the people who were crying out for help from the wounds inflicted upon them.
"Love, are you alright?" Galahad asked cradling me in his arms as Tristan looked on in silent contemplation while checking me over to make sure I wasn't harmed to badly.
"Tired…cold…take me home Galahad." I whispered and wrapped my arms around his neck, pressing myself completely into his chest trusting and knowing him to keep me safe from anything out there I was too tired to defend myself.
Along the way Lancelot touched my hand while Dagonet picked up my fallen sword and stared at it and then back at me proudly with a small smile on my face which I returned over Galahad's shoulder before ultimately giving into the dark.
Chapter Twenty-Three: Comfort my Fears, Ease my Pain
A/N: I AM SO SORRY FOR HOW LONG THE UPDATES HAVE TAKEN! We are having major problems with our internet so it's taking a while. I'll try and keep them coming as fast I can.
When I woke up I saw the back of Galahad standing in front of the window while rain poured against it making me smile at the comforting sight as a candle burned next to the bed.
"How long have I been out?" I asked making him turn towards me and sigh in relief.
"Too long." He whispered coming to my side and sitting down next to me.
I smiled and touched his cheek before sitting up feeling completely drained for some reason.
"It's been like this ever since yesterday." He told me motioning to the window and rain.
I raised my eyebrow at him in confusion causing him to continue with,
"And it began like this with your scream yesterday."
Memories of what happened flashed back to me and I clasped his hand asking hurriedly,
"Vanora, is she alright?"
He smiled and nodded his head replying while brushing hair away from my eyes,
"She is, you saved her on that hill. I have a suspicion Bors will name this next child after you."
I laughed and kissed him lightly feeling comfort beginning to fill me up at the act and began to feel a bit more energized.
"I've never seen one move the way you did that day." He confessed, lying down on the bed so I was able to lie atop of him with my ear pressed firmly against his chest.
"I don't know what happened…it was scary, it was like I was there but something else had control over my body."
He continued to run his hand up and down my back in a comforting motion making me sigh and settle against him more comfortably.
"The others are worried and confused." He told me a few moments later while I relished in the heat of his skin against mine.
"I know, but I can't tell them what I told you, at least not all of them and not right now. You know that right?" I asked lifting my head and peering up at him to see him staring down at me in fondness.
"I'd only hope for it." He replied and pulled me up face-level with him so he could give me another gentle kiss, obviously still scared I wasn't completely well yet. When we pulled apart I laid my head back down against his shoulder and let my eyes fall shut when his strong arms came up and wrapped securely around my back holding me firmly against him.
"Sleep now." I whispered tiredly and felt myself beginning to fall into a warm safe lull that was Galahad.
When I awoke a few hours later I could tell it was later in the night and looked up a bit, smiling as I saw Galahad still sleeping quietly beneath me with his arms wrapped about my form. Kissing his lips lightly, I pulled away from him and stood from the bed to stretch my limbs surprised that I wasn't physically sore compared with how mentally and emotionally drained I was still feeling. It wasn't raining as hard as it had been and now there was only a slight drizzle coating the windows reminding me of autumn nights kept under the comfort of my sheets with the familiar sounds of my house lulling me to sleep. Pushing away the sad memories, I went to open the door but stopped when Galahad sat up a bit asking groggily,
"Are you alright?"
Nodding my head I told him gently,
"I'm going to find us some food, go back to sleep love."
He smiled at me when I used his term of endearment before falling back against the bed while I pushed out of the room and headed towards the taverns wondering just how many questions were going to be awaiting me there.
"What the bloody hell were you thinking? You could've been killed!" Lancelot bellowed when he caught first sight of me.
"There ya' are lass! Been meanin' to thank ya' properly for savin' my Van!" Bors said standing up with a large smile as Gawain came up to me and asked,
"Are you hurt?"
Before I could respond Dagonet came up behind me and placed a hand on my shoulder defending me quietly with,
"Give her a chance to speak."
I smiled at him in thanks and took the seat Tristan stood up and gave for me, opting to take a more darkened corner and just listen in on what I had to say.
"I'm fine, not hurt, just tired is all." I told the men with a shrug causing Lancelot to sigh and run his hands over his face while facing me on the bench asking in a more softer tone than he used to begin with,
"What happened out there on those fields? We've been training you, yes, but even we can't take credit for your sudden skills that day."
I blushed under the compliment and said meekly,
"There are some things about me that are different…things I can't go into tonight."
Lancelot narrowed his eyes at my rather cryptic comment but almost half a heart-beat later there was a familiar screech causing us all to turn until I was embraced by a mass of fiery red hair causing me to choke out and gasp both in surprise and in air-loss.
"You are crazy but I love you for it! I was so worried when they brought you back in…I thought you were hurt, or worse." She whispered in my ear before pulling back with watery eyes.
I smiled and wiped the tears away feeling my own coming on as I told her,
"There was no way I wasn't going out there for you. No way."
She choked out a laugh and shook her head in amused disbelief before pulling away when Bors gently brought her to his lap when he realized she was still squeezing me far too tight.
"Arthur's been locked up in his rooms ever since." Lancelot commented looking in the direction of said rooms before turning back to me and pulling me into his arms whispering tightly against the crown of my head,
"I beg you to never do that again Dawn, for my heart nearly leapt from my chest at the fear that ran through my body."
I smiled and pulled him into a tighter hug relishing in the comfort I received from all these men and Vanora. When I pulled away from him, Dagonet sat down beside me on the bench allowing me to lean tiredly against him when I began to feel the effects of so much intensity in so little amount of time.
"Come, I'll take you back to him." He whispered but I shook my head in protest saying weakly with a yawn,
"I came out here to get some food for us."
I didn't notice him look up at Tristan nor did I see Tristan nod his head and go off in the direction of the kitchens as Dagonet was busy scooping me up easily into his arms as I just held onto him limply, feeling my eyelids beginning to get heavier and heavier.
When we passed by Gawain, he stopped us by touching my hand and saying sincerely with a different tone than I've ever heard him use,
"Take care of him, yeah?"
I just smiled and nodded my head before collapsing back against Dagonet's chest with a small sigh.
Bodies littered the ground I walked on making it nearly impossible to not step on a limb in the process of getting to my destination. There was an undeniable stench of death and pain as I walked with tears running down my bloodied cheeks to the still body that lay before me. A sword hung limply in one of my hands while the other held a menacing looking axe, both dripping with blood and trailing red spots over the grassy knoll.
My heart felt like it was shaking as I finally stopped at the body before falling to my knees soundlessly, the weapons dropping next to me as I looked unseeingly at the back having an arrow lodged in it. Raising a shaking hand, I pulled the shoulder towards me and watched the body follow until it was on its back.
"Don't die my love." I whispered sadly, listening as the wind came quickly and took my words with it to the farthest corners of the earth while lifeless green eyes stared up into the heavens.
I shot up quick in the bed with a gasp and looked around wildly realizing I was alone as Galahad must have finally ventured out.
"Oh god…" I groaned running my hands over my face not at all liking the feeling my dream had left me with. The door opened with a creak and I looked up just as Lancelot poked his head inside hesitantly but his eyes widened some before narrowing when he saw me in the middle of the bed.
"What are you…" He began to say but I cut him off with a shake of the head and,
"I was sleeping."
He came fully inside of the room and shut the door behind him while looking at me in a way that made me feel as if he was trying to figure out all my secrets.
"Stop looking at me like that." I muttered and rose from the bed to stand in front of the window…desperate to get away from his piercing gaze.
I listened quietly to his footsteps as he neared and found it odd just how awake I was feeling, it was as if every part of my senses was alive and I could feel the room humming with energy as I was aware of everything in it.
"I worry for you." He admitted while standing behind me with a comforting hand on my shoulder.
"Why?" I asked tonelessly, covering his hand with mine.
He didn't respond but gave my shoulder a reassuring squeeze allowing me to close my eyes and revel in the silent comfort. Concern seemed to be radiating off of him in waves finally making me turn and tell him as convincingly as I could,
"You don't need to worry about me, I'm fine."
He raised an unbelieving eyebrow at me making me raise a haughty one in defiance until he finally sighed and said,
"Very well, if you wish to keep your secrets know that I will always be ready to protect you from them."
I smiled while my eyes filled with tears and nodding my head I wrapped my arms tightly around his middle and pressed my cheek to his chest…right above his heart.
"I know you will." I murmured and closed my eyes when his own arms came up to give me a calming hug.
It was a few nights later when I was standing on the top of the wall when I felt someone coming up closer behind me causing me to turn and see Tristan leaning next to me. We stood staring out into the distance in comfortable silence until a few minutes passed and he looked at me questioningly. Sighing I told him,
"It's different…I mean I feel so different."
He looked at me with a raised eyebrow making me turn and rest my back against the wall trying to explain it to him with,
"I've never felt so in tune before…I mean it's like I can feel so many things around me that it's almost overwhelming."
"You're changing." He said flatly.
"Yeah…but into what?" I asked almost in fear.
He turned and fully looked at me this time in an appraising sort of way before telling me still bluntly,
"What you are meant for."
I shook my head and faced him replying,
"What I'm meant for is death and destruction and now that Merlin knows I'm coming into my powers, I think he's trying to kill me before I come after him."
He nodded his head in agreement before solving with,
"We kill him first."
Shaking my head in disagreement I said sadly,
"I don't want anymore people to die because of me Tristan, I just want to be normal."
He didn't reply and for some reason I found that comforting as it just allowed me to talk and get my feelings and emotions out there.
"I feel like I'm never going to get away from my past, like I'll never be able to get a fresh start or new memories not based on old ones. Even though I died back in my own world, I just can't seem to get away from it here."
Sighing, I watched in fascination as my breath froze in the air before he said stoically,
"The past is kept, not forgotten."
I thought on his words for a bit before nodding my head in agreement and whispering to him secretly,
"I've been having these dreams lately, I mean since I've been here, and I can't help but think that something bigger is about to happen…that we're in the calm before the storm."
He continued staring out into the night but something inside of me knew he was just listening and letting me talk to get this all off of my chest.
"And I don't think it's going to be a good something."
He stood from the wall and said,
"Then tell him."
Confused, I looked around quickly for what he was talking about and when I went to turn back and ask him what he meant he was already gone. A few moments later however it was answered for me when I heard Arthur come walking up the steps.
"Decided to come out of hiding?" I tease without looking back at him.
He came up next to me in the spot that Tristan had just been in and sighed heavily saying,
"I've many things to think on, it takes time."
Grinning I turned and replied,
"Don't hurt yourself Arthur, I mean a little tree-bending isn't that big of a deal."
He turned to me and said with all seriousness,
"You knew Merlin, and he knew of you…why else would you direct all your anger onto him?"
Sighing I turned back and let my jocular façade fall before nodding my head and telling him solemnly,
"I know him, yeah…I met him a few times while I've been here but that was before I knew that the two of you don't get along."
His eyes were still staring intensely into mine at my confession and I was surprised that I wasn't squirming under the attention.
"How is this possible?" He asked with a note of betrayal in his voice that had me internally cringing a bit.
"It's a long and emotional story that I don't really want to get into tonight but just know that he understands my loyalty lies with you and the men. I think that's part of the reason why he came after me."
"The fight initiated outside the wall was in cause of you." He stated without looking at me.
"He's afraid of what I'm capable of…and how it can be used against him by his enemy."
He looked down at me in confusion but I shook my head and said,
"Another explanation for another night. Just please understand that I would never do anything that would go against anything having to do with you. I'd never do that, trust me."
"How am I to trust you when you continually keep such happenings from me?" He demanded becoming slightly angry.
"Trust is a funny thing Arthur, it's not always beautiful words and it's not always something people want to hear."
He turned and faced me fully and took hold of my shoulders asking with much emotion behind his usually guarded features,
"And do you trust me Dawn?"
Smiling softly I nodded my head making his hold on my arms loosen a bit before he pleaded quietly,
"Then you must know that whatever darkness your secrets, your truth, holds I shall not cast upon it any judgment save that worthy of a friend who loves you."
I touched his cheek lightly and told him dazedly while remembering a part of a quote I once heard,
"We trust as we love."
Taking his arm, I pulled him to sit on the stone across from me while gathering my thoughts and began quietly with,
"It all starts with my past, and what I was created for…"
Dawn was approaching by the time I had finished explaining as much as I could to him and I was now watching him pace back and fourth along the wall with his hands clasped behind his back.
"So much death…and pain…" he murmured to himself allowing me to decide not to respond to the statement.
I was wringing my hands in anticipation of what was to come and looked up when he stopped in front of me so the bright colors of the rising sky seemed to illuminate his form in a godly like way.
"I agree with what you spoke of Galahad reassuring you with." He finally told me after a few tense moments and more thoughts than I would have liked going on behind his eyes.
"And that is?" I prodded while looking up at him.
He kneeled down and took my hands in his telling me earnestly,
"God must have more than one plan for you during your time on this earth and I'm grateful he placed you in our care."
Smiling, I threw my arms around his neck and squeezed him tightly feeling a lot of my fear of what was to come dwindle as he held me tenderly and rubbed my back up and down.
"I'm scared Arthur…so scared." I whispered into his ears with my eyes squeezed shut tightly while I admitted to him what I was too admit to myself and Galahad.
"What do you fear so?" He asked concerned and pulled away so we were staring at each other.
"Every time a more powerful being makes me into something I'm not it's always used for death and pain…"
He cupped my face and told me,
"God would not use such an innocent woman for such a deadly tool."
I shook my head and breathed,
"I don't know if it's God."
He didn't reply and I continued on with,
"I can feel it inside of me, slowly taking over and making me more powerful but I don't know for what. I'm afraid I'm going to lose control and pretty soon I'm not going to be me anymore…just a weapon to be used."
He shook his head and promised,
"I shall not let any such happening, I swear it."
Tears leaked out of the corners of my eyes and I said huskily,
"I don't think anyone's going to be able to stop what's to come."
He stared at me in confusion making me sigh and close my eyes to regain my bearings before telling him,
"I've been having these odd dreams since I appeared here and I can't help but feel like something bigger is on the way…and much more worse."
He stood up and turned to look out into the open as the sun was beginning to show its head over the fields.
"Then we shall deal with it when it comes to us." He said decisively.
Standing up, I took a spot next to him and told him in admiration,
"You're going to be a man books are written about one day you know."
He scoffed at that causing me to turn him around to face me and I told him while keeping my eyes locked on his,
"All I think I can safely say is that you will leave your mark Arthur…and your legacy."
Hope shined in his eyes and he surprised me by taking me swiftly in his arms for a tight hug before releasing me just as quickly and striding down the steps throwing back to me over his shoulder,
"I'd have it no other way Dawn…you arriving to us and completing us the way you do."
I was too choked up to say much else or do much else except smile and nod my head while watching him walk back towards his rooms to probably do some more brooding…God, he'd give Angel a run for his money.
Chapter Twenty-Four: A Union of our Own
When I finally made it back to my rooms I opened the door and saw Galahad standing inside by the window before he turned around quickly at my entrance and relief flooded his features.
"I've been waiting for you. I saw you speaking with Arthur and wished not to interrupt."
Smiling at him I finally let my eyes roam him and felt my mouth being to water a bit at the fact that he was wearing a very loose white tunic that opened so much in the front I could see to the middle of his bronzed chest.
"You'll never be an interruption." I told him quickly while looking up back up to meet his eyes but by the look in them I realized he had seen my perusal of his body.
"I've missed you." He said softly while stalking slowly towards me with a tiny grin on his face that had me involuntarily taking the steps back to counter-act his.
"I can tell." I replied playfully until I was forced to stop when my back met the wall.
He continued coming forward until our chests were pressed together and his forearms were resting on the wall by either side of my head. One roughened finger drew down the side of my neck and over my exposed collarbone leaving a trail of visible goose-bumps in it's' wake that caused him to grin smugly at the instant reaction my body had towards his.
"I feel as if I haven't seen you in days." He told me with his eyes following the path his finger was making across the top of my dress.
I couldn't reply and instead closed my eyes at the overwhelming feeling of his hands on my body once again.
"We should get reacquainted then, don't you think?" I suggested breathlessly while holding tightly onto his hips as he let his hands fall to my ribs.
"Undoubtedly." He replied before picking me up so I had to wrap my legs around his waist to stable myself.
I let my hands run through his soft curls, loving that hair gel wasn't invented yet, enabling my hands to slice through his hair like warm butter. He twirled us around and walked back towards my bed while laying soft open-mouthed kisses on my neck that had me moving against him with my head dipped back.
"This can take nights upon nights you understand." He told me conversationally when he released my neck and laid me down softly but firmly underneath him as he hovered above me with a gleam in his eyes.
"I could only hope." I replied and grabbed hold of the chain around his neck that held an intricate symbol to pull him down in order to kiss him. The kiss was teasingly slow at his control before I took it back by pulling his lower body flush against mine with a tightening of my legs around him.
He groaned and nipped at my lips before moving to the column of my jaw as I managed to get the tunic over his body and head, much to his disgruntlement as he had to stop kissing me for a moment's time.
"I will never get tired of seeing you like this." I admitted to him while running my hands up and down the powerful muscles of his back to his delight.
"And I you." He replied while working at the front laces of my dress.
He pulled it up and over my head and I watched with happiness as his eyes darkened when he drank in my body beneath his.
"You possess the herbs?" He asked huskily while pulling himself closer to me causing us both to groan in pleasurable torture. Frantically nodding my head I pulled his lips back down onto mine and with one grind of my hips against his he was pushing me back into the mattress with a tight grip on my bare waist and his own hips holding me down.
The candlelight cast a soft glow about the room while the fire licked at our feet with its warmth creating a cozy setting as I laid bare underneath the covers content to watch his chest rise and fall in his sleep.
"I love you." I whispered softly to him, drinking him in and wondering just how this had all happened to me…and if it was too good to be true. I was shocked out of my beginning thoughts when his rough voice replied back,
"And I you."
I smiled at him while he fixed his eyes on mine and brought his hands up to smooth over the top of my eyebrow with his thumb.
"What are you thinking on love?" He asked while sitting up allowing me a view of his chest bathed in yellow light from the candles and fire while he got comfortable.
"Just thinking about how incredibly lucky I am." I told him, running my fingers back and fourth across his skin just needing to remain touching him some how.
"Dawn, what is it?" He asked concerned making me realize just how easily he was able to read me now.
Slowly bringing my eyes up to his own I laid my head down on the pillow and admitted,
"I'm just afraid about what happens next I suppose."
He leaned his head down on his hand propped up on his elbow while resting his arm along the curve created by my hip.
"What frightens you?"
Taking in a deep breath I finally admitted to him what I was afraid to admit to anyone else except Spike years ago,
"I'm evil Galahad, good things aren't supposed to happen to evil people."
He stared at me in surprise while bringing me in closer so I was pressed securely against his chest trying to convince me with,
"Dawn, there is nothing about you that is evil. Everything you are and everything I see is good and beautiful."
Smiling sadly I looked up at him and replied,
"Yeah, but the things I'm meant for…"
He stopped me by placing a quieting finger over my lip and with a soft look in his eyes told me,
"You are meant to love and be loved. You must stop punishing yourself for this purpose that is no longer yours."
"I just keep on feeling like something's going to happen tomorrow…that everything is going to be taken away and I will finally be in the ground where I'm supposed to be. That this…you…the knights are all just a tease of what could have been and what I'll never be able to keep."
He pulled me even more closer and threw his leg over both of mine as if to completely envelop me in him and said while tilting my chin up so my eyes met his,
"We have been given something love, the gods have blessed us in this matter and nothing…nothing, is going to take you away from me. Look at how our union came to be, it is not mere coincidence…it's fate."
I smiled and rested my cheek against his chest beginning to feel some of the worry dissipate until it all but disappeared when his next words were,
"Would you have me as your husband?"
Shocked, I brought my head up quickly towards his only to see calm happiness in his as he stared back at me silently and I couldn't stop myself as I asked in surprise,
"You would have me?"
He slowly smiled before brushing my hair back from my face and whispered against my jaw,
"I would keep you."
My entire self melted at his words and I couldn't help but laugh to let loose a lot of pent up emotions while thoughts whirled around inside of my head. Throwing my arms around his neck I whispered yes over and over again with repeated peppered kisses against his bare skin until he groaned and rolled me underneath him.
"Enough, you've worn me out past myself for the day."
We both chuckled softly while he reached behind his neck and unclasped the necklace that hung there, bringing it forward for me to see.
"It was my mothers, a gift before I left."
Tears were running down my cheeks as I realized just what was happening here while he clasped the necklace around my neck, it coming down to rest in-between my breasts while he lovingly ran a finger over the emblem.
"I kept it with me these years to keep home near but I've no need of it now."
He looked into my eyes and smiled before telling me,
"You're my home love…you're all I need as a reminder."
I cried softly at his words and brought my forehead against his while clutching tightly to his arms unable to process everything going on at once.
"I don't even know how this works." I admitted to him in-between a laugh and a sob.
"How what works?" He asked with a fond smile, rolling over and taking me with him so I was sprawled comfortably across his chest.
"I mean, do we have a priest do the ceremony, do you have to ask Dagonet and Lancelot for permission…do we have to have a reception…"
He stopped me with his quizzical looks and asked,
"What is all this you speak of?"
"Well what all do we have to do to get married…become husband and wife?"
He gave me another confused look before telling me,
"My love for your love…an oath we've already sworn. We need not a priest to sanctify this in front of others. You accepting me as your husband and mine as you my wife is more than enough to become one in the eyes of others."
My mouth opened a bit and he seemed to take it the wrong way as he continued on with,
"However if you wish for a Roman wedding it can also happen as such."
Shaking my head and smiling widely I threw my arms around him again and whispered,
"No, this is perfect. Your love for my love."
He kissed my lips softly before taking my left hand and holding it out in front of both of us to inspect it.
"I do suppose however you would like a ring?"
Looking down at his valued necklace that lay on my chest I shook my head and held the chain out replying,
"This is enough for me…nothing could ever mean as much."
He took the necklace in his hands as well before bending down and kissing me once more while I sighed into his mouth happily and ran my hands down his back…down my husbands' back.
Chapter Twenty-Five: It's begun
When the news broke about mine and Galahad's private wedding the first I was to hear from was Vanora moving as quickly as she could down towards me with a bright smile on her face and tears in her eyes.
"It's just so wonderful!" She cried while pulling me into a hug as Galahad kissed my neck once and made his way over towards where it looked like Gawain was doing his best attempting to tell a growingly irate Lancelot and a calm looking Dagonet.
"I know, I just can't believe it finally happened. I thought I'd never get married and now here I am!"
"What token did he give you?" She asked and I knew she was referring to a ring of some sort.
Pulling my dress out, I lifted up the chain and handed it out to here hand for inspection while it remained securely around my neck.
"It's beautiful." She said after a few silent moments before handing it back with a smile as I tucked it back into my shirt.
We both turned when we heard a loud burst and I was shocked to see Dagonet attempting to hold back Lancelot who had somehow drawn his swords and was glaring heatedly at Galahad who was glaring back just as fiercely as Gawain put a restraining hand on his shoulder.
"Oh boy." I whimpered as Vanora wished me well luck and made my way quickly over hoping to remain a wife longer than I did a widow.
"What's going on?" I asked coming up to the group of four men.
"Married? Married? You're bloody married?" Lancelot yelled beyond furious.
Gulping, I looked to Galahad for support or guidance but he was too busy growling at Lancelot while gripping a random sword he must have grabbed in his hand.
"Yes, I'm married and I'd appreciate it if you'd lower the swords you've got aimed for my husband." I stressed the last word and I noticed both mens' shoulders relax just a little bit.
I looked at Dagonet pleadingly and sighed with happiness when he walked over towards me and kissed my forehead whispering just loud enough for the others to hear,
"I'm pleased for you Dawn. You have my blessing."
He and Galahad clasped shoulders while Gawain came up and hugged me with a loud and disbelieving laugh at all that had happened. When the two Knights walked away Lancelot shouted out to them,
"That's just bloody perfect then isn't it?"
Walking up to him I wrapped my arms tightly around him and felt him tense before giving in and hugging me back.
"I'm happy Lancelot…he makes me happy. Please don't be upset with me."
He sighed and slowly began rubbing his hands up and down my back before grumbling,
"At least tell me when you're with child, yeah?"
I laughed and nodded my head before pulling back and kissing his cheek and dragged Galahad away before anything else could be said.
"There, not too painful was it?" I asked cheerfully causing him to give me a dry look while setting down the knife.
"I feel as if I've married a woman with more than one father."
I laughed and wrapped my arm around his waist while we walked down the cobbled street as I attempted to console him the best I could without mentioning we had yet to tell Bors or Arthur.
Later that afternoon when Galahad was training away his frustrations of Lancelot with Gawain, I crept out to the knoll he had shown me months ago and looked out into the pink sky from the setting sun. Sighing, I wrapped my arms around myself to help with the chill while pulling my necklace out and holding it in my hands loving the feel of its weight.
"So I'm married." I said aloud wondering if she could hear me at all...feel what I was saying.
"I'm married to the most amazing man who loves me more than I thought I would ever be loved." I looked up and smiled serenely before continuing with,
"You would completely fall in love with him too you know…and I'm sure he would have adored you when he met you."
Looking back out forward I continued on with,
"I always thought a wedding was going to this huge affair with flowers and people and chairs and then he just completely takes me by surprise in the most…pleasant of ways."
Smiling and looking down fondly at the necklace that lay against my skin I whispered,
"I guess it's all the same that it wasn't a huge ordeal with you not being here and all. Buffy would have probably given me one of her infamous lectures with Xander glaring at Galahad in a way too similar fashion of Lancelot. And the others…well, I guess that doesn't really matter now anymore."
Staring up at the bright sky, I closed my eyes and breathed in everything around me still trying to get accustomed to the connection I felt with things around me. Opening my eyes, I smiled sadly up into the sky and murmured almost inaudibly,
"I would have had you give me away mom, I would have wanted you to be the one to walk me down the aisle."
I smiled wider as the wind picked up around me and the familiar scent of jasmine and vanilla surrounded me.
"I miss you…" I whispered and felt the wind take my words to what felt like the very corners of the earth.
A soft press into the ground behind me had me whirling around to see Tristan making his way towards me wearing a white tunic and some leather breeches obviously have gotten done with training a few moments ago.
He came up and stood beside me with his hands clasped loosely behind his back, staring out at the sky lying before us. Nothing about mine and Galahad's union needed to be said and I felt relief that it had been Tristan who had followed me out here and not one of the others.
"Want to see something cool?" I asked and had to hold back the laugh at the look he gave me before I turned towards the nearest tree and held my hand out towards it.
"I have sort of been playing around with this whole new 'power' thing." I explained to him before closing my eyes and concentrating hard, feeling the click snap between us and began swaying as the tree was moving in the wind. Whispering quiet words to it, I opened my eyes happily as the leaves began swirling around us in a dance I controlled while the tree began to copy the moves I was swaying in.
"I know, very Pocahontas of me but I thought it was amazing." I breathed out in glee as he followed the paths of the leaves around his body before I dropped the connection and stumbled a bit feeling lightheaded.
"It kind of takes a lot out of you." I said and was surprised and he grasped my elbow to help and stable me.
"Practice and it won't." He replied in his usual clipped tone.
"I know, I know…practice makes perfect." I muttered suddenly feeling like I was talking to Buffy again.
He slowly released me when I regained myself while I asked him,
"I haven't really felt Merlin in the last few nights, do you think he's left or something?"
He didn't look at me and waited a few full minutes to reply back with,
"He plans."
Surprised at the answer in the silence I was beginning to get used to, I turned and asked with furrowed eyebrows,
"What's he planning?"
He finally flicked his eyes onto mine before replying back tonelessly,
"To kill you."
I was surprised when I didn't feel shock at his remark and instead shot back,
"Yeah, well he should take a number and pull up a seat. It's a long wait in that department."
"Fear what you can't control." He told me before turning and began to walk back towards wherever he had came from.
"Or what you don't know." I whispered to myself before whirling around and calling out to him,
"What if I just talked to him? Told him I wasn't out to get him."
His eyes pierced into mine and he told me without the sugar-coating,
"Go to him and you won't come back."
Nodding my head slowly and solemnly I turned around and tested out my budding powers by closing my eyes and felt him leave as his hawk swooped down and landed on his shoulder. Slowly opening my eyes, I smiled out proudly into the night wondering just how far I could take them. It was time to figure it out.
"Tell me again what you are doing love." Galahad asked the next night after we had moved my belongings into his room. He sat perched on the bed while I sat cross-legged in front of the dying fire.
Sighing as he interrupted my concentration for what felt like the fiftieth time I turned to him and replied,
"Trying to concentrate, you mind?"
He smirked at me as I turned back and closed my eyes once more wondering if I was even going about this the right way.
"Yes, but concentrate on what?" He asked playfully.
Standing up and turning around on him I pointed my finger in his direction threatening,
"Do you want to be permanently banned from this room mister? Because you are so on your way towards that destination."
"Why are you so upset?" He asked with raised eyebrows making me furrow my own at his façade of innocence.
"Perhaps because even ten seconds or so you have to continually ask me what I'm doing no matter how many times I've tried explaining it to you." I said with my hands thrown out frustrated making me wince as I was still sore from the intense training Dagonet and Gawain had put me through this afternoon.
"But you've never fully explained to me what it is that you are attempting to do." He said calmly, rising from the bed to stand in front of me and attempting to reach forward and massage out the kinks for me.
"Well that's because I haven't exactly figured it out yet!" I yelled letting out all my frustrations of what I was going through in my statement.
I was surprised when he gave me a broad smile before pointing over my shoulder with wide eyes. Turning around, my own eyes widened dramatically while I took a surprised step backwards into his chest when I saw the once dying fire burning to life in the fireplace.
"Did I do that?" I whispered walking closer towards it while Galahad right behind me.
"I've had my suspicions since the day on the hill with Merlin." He explained to me softly while we both stared in awe at the flickering flames.
Turning my head over my shoulder I raised an eyebrow in a questioning manner making him smile before telling me,
"I've wondered if your powers have been connected with your emotions. It seems it does have quite an effect after all."
Things began to make sense and click together and before I knew it I was beaming up at him and throwing my arms around his neck exclaiming,
"You brilliant beautiful man!"
He laughed and sat us both down so I was lying across his lap with my upper body cradled against his chest.
"This is so cool!" I said happily as we both stared at the fire in peaceful content now that my frustrations and tenseness seemed to be getting licked away by the orange flames.
He pressed a soft kiss to my forehead and tightened his arms around me before we were lulled into a dreamy state.
Chapter Twenty-Six: You Undo Me
"What are you doing out here?" I asked Lancelot late one night on the wall.
He turned towards me in surprise replying,
"I could ask the same of you. What are you doing wandering the fort so late at night?"
Shrugging my shoulders I came and stood next to him explaining,
"Just couldn't sleep I guess. What's your excuse?"
He sighed and looked out ahead telling me softly,
"Sleep doesn't come easy for me either."
He looked down at me before swiftly opening the cloak he had wrapped around his shoulders and pulled me into the warmth it and he created. Sighing as the chills began to stop I leaned my head against his shoulder and said,
"I haven't seen much of you lately. Where've you been?"
Pulling us back against the wall he rubbed my arms to try and help me warm up faster before saying,
"You're a married woman now Dawn, I supposed you had matters to take to."
Smiling and shaking my head I told him honestly,
"Lancelot, no matter where I am or what I'm doing I will always want to see you sometime during the day."
He smirked and pulled me closer teasing with,
"Yes, tis what all the women say to me."
Laughing and nudging him in the side I closed my eyes and breathed in deeply practicing with extending myself outward feeling the things that were still roaming around the forest this late at night.
"Will you and Galahad have sons?" He asked softly causing my eyes to widen and stare up at him in shock.
"I haven't really thought about that." I whispered trying to figure out why I was reeling from the question.
"I mean, does Galahad even want kids?" I asked trying to move forward.
He smiled down at me and replied,
"What man wouldn't want to have children with the woman they love?"
Seeing the longing in his eyes I sighed and asked,
"And what about you Lancelot, will you ever settle down and have a family?"
He laughed without humor and replied,
"This is my life Dawn, I don't expect to live long enough to start a new one."
Saddening at his outlook I replied,
"You'd be surprised how many second chances you can be given."
He looked down at me once more before pulling the cloak tighter around the both of us diffusing the serious situation effectively with,
"And when shall I do this as I'm constantly worrying after you sister?"
Gasping out in mock outrage I pulled away from him a bit and replied back with a finger in his chest,
"You've got it all mixed up in that pretty little head of yours, it's me who's constantly having to look out after you."
He laughed and pulled me forward back into his warmth whispering against the top of my head quietly,
"You and the others are all I desire for now Dawn. Tis all I need."
Smiling in content, I closed my eyes and let myself doze for just a bit in his brotherly protective embrace wondering what the future would hold for this great man I had come to call my brother.
"Should I be jealous?" Galahad asked early the next morning as we laid intertwined in bed after I told him where I had been for most of the night.
"Of Laneclot? Sure! It'll definitely be a point for my ego." I quipped and even though he didn't understand, he knew I was joking and chuckled softly while brushing back my hair that was matted down from sweat of our earlier tryst.
"How many nights will I lose my wife to the company of my brother Knights?" He sighed out making me smile and lean up against his chest telling him while looking him in the eye,
"Galahad, there has only ever been one man who I've loved this much, wanted this badly, and needed this desperately. I've never felt this way about anyone in my entire life and I've never felt so loved or so cherished as I do. Besides you of course." I ended with a sly smirk while he locked eyes with me and rolled us over quickly so I was pinned beneath him.
"You and your bloody humor, my love, are going to be the death of me." He said while kissing my neck lightly.
Laughing, I pushed back the curls from his eyes and breathed in deeply the love I felt coming from this wonderful man.
"You are mine, are you not?" He asked softly and despite the feminism that had been engrained in me not only from my sister and the powerful women who I grew up with along with my society, I found myself melting at the possessive word and hold he had on me. Leaning my head up and touching his lips softly with mine I breathed out,
"Yes, I'm yours."
Before he could lean down and deepen the kiss, a loud knocking at the door made us both look up as Gawain's voice filtered through with,
"Hurry will you, training down in the field."
We both groaned and he hung his head down between his shoulders before I placed my hands on his warm sides and helped him out of bed.
"Don't want to get the others mad at you do you?" I asked while he pulled himself out of bed allowing me to admire his body as he moved around the room gathering his clothes.
"Of course not, that would be dreadful." He said dryly while pulling on some boots.
"I think my humor is rubbing off on you love." I told him while he leaned over me and said with a smile,
"Tis not all that you're rubbing on me I hope."
Laughing and kissing him as he pulled the sword free from where three others hung on the wall beside the bed, I pushed him off when he began to lower himself completely on top of me crying out,
"If you don't stop now I'll keep you prisoner in this bed and ravage you all day long."
He groaned and my words and I could feel him harden against me as he nipped more aggressively at my neck.
"You better go Galahad, my control is beginning to break." I gasped finally causing him to pull away and stare down at me with darkened eyes.
"We'll finish this when I return." He replied huskily with a promising note in his voice that had me shivering slightly much to his amusement.
When I was sure he couldn't hear me, I threw my legs in the air and squealed with happiness at the warm sensations he left me with.
GALAHAD'S P.O.V.
I strutted out to the field after managing to get rid of my discomfort courtesy of my wife's ministrations and saw the others had already begun training.
"What's kept you, eh?" Gawain taunted as I jumped in and came up towards him.
Grinning, I swung and we began our sword training as Bors called out,
"He's just jealous that he doesn' have 'is own lass to send 'im on his way."
I laughed as Gawain through a dirty look over in Bors' direction allowing me to thrust my sword upward, catching him off guard.
"And if he doesn't treat her properly, she won't have anything to say goodbye to any longer." Lancelot said with a pointed glare in my direction as Dagonet added to it with a sinister nod before the two continued on in their own training.
Mumbling underneath my breath, I continued on throwing my body into rigorous training as Gawain continued on taunting me about my new bride.
It felt like days later when I finally stumbled back into our rooms but all the soreness I had felt vanished at the sight of her still asleep in our bed. Probably still exhausted from her late night talk with Lancelot…something I would need to discuss with him later.
Pulling off my boots and then my clothes, I climbed in bed with her and pulled her against me, greedily inhaling her fresh scent that seemed to cling to every part of her body. I grinned at the mark I had given her early this morning that lay proudly on her neck and felt a primal possessiveness well up inside of me causing me to pull her tightly against me and push my leg up in-between hers. Her eyes snapped open with her loud gasp and I smirked down at her as she shuddered in my arms.
"Good afternoon to you too." She whispered, swallowing, still trying to regain herself.
Smiling, I pulled her further up on my thigh she was straddling drawing a ragged moan from her lips that had my pride soaring as I could already feel her dampen against my leg.
"I didn't know I was so tired." She admitted while her skin heated up at the affect I was having on her.
"Lancelot has tired you from the other night?" I asked while rocking my knee upwards making her clutch at my arms.
"No, you and your insatiable body have from this morning." She countered with her eyes shut close and her mouth parted open with a breathy sigh.
"My deepest apologies love." I whispered against her neck, feeling her pulse racing frantically as my body pulled towards hers involuntarily.
"Don't apologize…just do it again." She begged and my control snapped from that moment onward.
END GALAHAD'S P.O.V.
