Caffeine
By Autumn Win-Dow
The daily coffee tasted unusually bitter that morning.
Natsume peered over his raised mug, at the usual barista conversing with customers, as she always did. In recent days, Anna had been able to draw an impressive crowd to her cafe, with the introduction of her special mixed pound cake. However, she had been busy for two weeks already, and she never seemed to slip in her work despite the pressure.
He saw no sweat on her brow.
Anna had always given him the usual coffee every morning, and this was the first time the taste seemed off.
Natsume began to wonder if it was just him - but a voice immediately corrected his thoughts.
Of course it isn't you.
The shrill of his cell phone interrupted his musings, and he paused when he noticed the caller's name on the screen.
Natsume's frown deepened at the thought of answering.
Why would she call now?
Nevertheless, he answered, noticing those around him who could not ignore the disruptive rings.
"Yes?"
"...It's me. Mikan Sakura."
"I know."
"You do?"
"What do you want?" He forced between clenched teeth.
"Oh! I'm sorry... if you're busy, I could call another time-"
Hearing the panic in the woman's voice, Natsume could not help but correct himself immediately.
"I'm not busy."
"...Really? Well, I guess it's good that I called..."
An awkward silence ensued due to his lack of a reply.
And, as always, Mikan would choose to break the silence.
"Can I see you? Today?"
Natsume felt his breath catch in his throat. His hand slowly lowered, placing the coffee mug on the table.
"A-Are you still there?"
"Ten, in my office." He abruptly ended the call, his mind filled with anxiety.
Why does she want to see me? And this sudden call- damn, I can't think properly.
"Natsume? Is the coffee bad?"
His head snapped up, to see Anna's familiar pink hair. Noticing the concern on her features, the man forced a smile and replied.
"No. It's perfect, as always."
Natsume made sure to place his hands under the desk, so that Mikan would not notice them clenching repeatedly. However, his attempts to mask his anxiousness evidently failed, when Mikan stared at him questioningly.
"Are you alright? I'm not interrupting anything, am I?" She asked, genuine worry evident in her tone.
"I told you before, you're interrupting nothing. I was here for the entire morning."
Lies.
"You have bags under your eyes. Have you been sleeping well?"
Natsume sighed and leaned his forearm on the table, looking Mikan right in the eye. "This isn't about me. This is about you. What did you want?"
The brunette froze in her seat, before letting out a long held breath and fiddling with her thumbs, eventually breathing out her answer. "I'm… having trouble sleeping, recently."
"I see the extra foundation," Natsume commented without thinking, and thus resulting in a glare from Mikan. His brief smirk disappeared from his face as soon it came, and he questioned her with a serious tone. "Do you know why?"
"You know why."
"You're being pretty damn ambiguous here." Natsume growled under his breath.
"But isn't it obvious?" Mikan scoffed, leaning forward and prodding Natsume in the chest with her finger in indignation. "My own husband thinks I'm a cheater!"
Despite Mikan's sheer confidence, it was the first time Natsume had ever heard of such a thing. At first, he huffed, but suddenly the image of Mikan with another man sent his blood raging.
He glanced up at the panicking female, and without thinking, he smirked.
"Well… are you?"
She raised her hand to slap him, but resisted. Instead, she raised her voice in disbelief.
"How could you ask that?! Of course I'm not!"
"But you're completely riled up about it. Your reaction shouldn't be this strong."
"How can I not be angry when you ask such ridiculous things?!"
Never in the period of time he knew her had he seen her so angry, nor raise her hand to hit someone. Natsume sat in his seat, stunned, and with his jaw slightly hanging open.
But... is she cheating? Is she cheating on m- no. Stop thinking. Just stop.
It took him a while to notice that Mikan was wiping something away from her face.
"Mikan?"
"What?"
"You're crying."
"No shit, Sherlock." She whispered, in a bitter tone.
Natsume pushed himself out of his seat and attempted to grab her arms, but she quickly moved away from his grasp. He opened his mouth to ask her why she had done so, but her frantic eyes silenced him, and his arms fell to his sides.
"I'm sorry."
"No, I'm sorry." Mikan murmured, forcing a smile. "I shouldn't have put this all on you. I shouldn't have come. I should've-"
Natsume sighed as she rambled, and grabbed her wrist, pulling her towards him. "Stop saying that you 'shouldn't have done this, shouldn't have done that'. Everything's already happened. It's time to face the music."
The brunette arched her eyebrows, before stubbornly pulling her wrist away from his grasp. "What music?"
"What?"
"I have nothing to hide. I didn't cheat."
"But still-
"And I do regret things, Natsume." She groaned in a fit of despair. "I should've just told you over the phone-"
Natsume was getting increasingly irritated by her rambling - he could no longer resist raising his own voice.
"Told me what? That we should stop seeing each other? Even though I'm just your psychiatrist?"
Mikan fell silent. Her eyes flickered from the nameplate, to Natsume, to her handbag, to the view of her car from the window, and to Natsume again.
Her actions were making him nervous. The silence was gradually frightening him. He mustered all of his strength to remain calm in front of her, however.
"I was right."
"We both know that I'm not having an affair. But Tsubasa thinks so-"
"And he's wrong-"
"But that doesn't matter! Our relationship was improving again, before this happened-"
"You idiot. Nothing happened."
"Natsume, you don't understand, do you? I don't want this to happen again... I don't think I need a psychiatrist for my issues anymore."
A part of him had always known that he was hopeless in terms of Mikan. She was already married, she had come to him for the sake of rekindling with her husband, yet he still had the audacity to fall in love with her. Natsume had always hoped that a miracle would occur, that Mikan would actually return his feelings, and he would not have to bear the stigma of an unreciprocated love for a married woman.
I always have the worst damn luck.
He had lost all strength in his body - he felt too tired, his lack of sleep had finally hit him, and he had no choice but to seat himself down as she slowly left the room. However, he was in no mood to sleep - he was aware of her apologetic expression as she left, the soft "Goodbye, Natsume," from her lips, and the sound of her heavy footsteps against the tile floor.
Anna glanced at the clock, expecting her regular customer to arrive soon - and, as expected, the sound of bells tinkled in accordance to the door opening, revealing Natsume with even heavier eye bags than the day before.
Concerned, she picked up the freshly brewed coffee she had already prepared for him, and personally brought it to his table.
"Natsume? You look dreadful." She commented as she placed the cup on the table in front of him.
The black haired man scoffed bitterly. "Of course I do."
He picked up the cup and stared at its liquid contents, and after a brief moment of thought, spoke up once again.
"I'm going to need two more cups."
A/N: This is so unbearably clichéd that I want to bang my head on the wall and ask myself WHY I WROTE THIS AND FELT GOOD ABOUT IT AFTERWARDS. But I always publish fics when I finish them, so here you go.
But hey, I finally achieved a fic past 1000 words after ages. But still, I think my shorter fics are better. HAHA. Hope you (somehow) enjoyed it. :)