I remember it like it was yesterday, probably because it was literally yesterday that this thing happened and I'm writing this the very day after. Anyway, it was yesterday. It was late and I think I was watching a movie or something. It was probably some shitty RomCom that was shunned by everyone and one I could barely justify. I should probably start watching better movies…maybe Jake can lend me some of his. Fuck I'm rambling. Okay, so it was late, I was watching a movie and I thought I would call it for a day. My eyes were literally about drop like fucking anchors I swear to god. I'm about three seconds from sleep when suddenly I here my trollian client go off and I fucking jump three feet off the sofa. It was fucking terrifying, like I got one Gamzee's horns blown right in my ear, or at least it felt like it. My respiteblock is pretty dark and the laptop was like a fluorescent fucking spotlight, shining straight into my eyes. I rubbed my eyes and walk over to it about to flip the fuck out at whoever would message me at this ungodly hour of the night. I sat down, about to type the best fucking rant ever, when I see who's messaged me.

GC: K4RK4T? H3Y, C4N YOU COM3 TO MY R3SP1T3BLOCK? PL34S3?

I sighed. Terezi…that girl is going to be the death off me I swear. I was going to ask her if she knew what time of night it was and why in the ever-living fuck she needed me to come over, but I didn't. I don't know why I didn't, maybe it was my instincts, maybe I felt all douched out for the day. So I head out of my block and down the hall to hers. Everyone's sleeping, even Gamzee and that guy never fucking sleeps. I got to her door and sighed. What was I doing? I knocked three times, lightly, so I didn't wake anyone up. Last thing I needed is everyone's sleepy ass shouting at me. Terezi opened the door a moment later and let me in. Her block was the identical to mine and everyone else's, except where I had my movie posters she had flarp ones. I came and sat down on her sofa and she sauntered over slowly. "Okay what do you want? I was just about to sleep and-"

"Do you love me?" she asked all of a sudden. I was taken aback. I remember squinting and opening my mouth like a fucking confused wiggler.

"W-what?" I stammered. It wasn't my most distinguished or dignified moment I have to admit.

"Do you love me?" she repeated. I literally had no idea what to say. Did I love her? Yes, I did. Immensely, more than she could probably understand. But I kept quiet, I wanted what was best for her and I could see that it wasn't me.

"I…um…" Like I said, not my best moment. " I don't know…" I lied. It was the only answer that I thought would warrant further conversation.

She sighed and came and sat beside me, resting her head on my shoulder. "Tell me the truth, Karkles…please?" The way she looked up at me I can't even describe. It was just pure sincerity. She really wanted know.

I summoned up what courage I had left. I placed my hands on her shoulders and turned her towards me, and then I leaned down and pressed my nose against hers. "Terezi Pyrope, I have loved you for longer than I care to remember. Through thick and thin, through Dave and Gamzee, through Noir and English, through all the moments of pain and all the moments of joy that we've been through, I've loved you more than I cared to tell you. I saw how you were, who you were and I knew that I wasn't the person you should've been with. I still don't think I am. Look at me Rez, I'm a failure of a leader who sits in his respiteblock all day, watching movies and writing sappy fanfiction. Is that really someone you want to be flushed for? Trust me, I'm not worth it." It was true and I did mean it. I wasn't looking for any sympathy; I just needed to let her know.

Those red eyes looked so innocently at me and I could feel tears glaze over my own. Then, a small teal coloured tear escaped from her eyes and rolled down her cheek. She looked up at me, her lip quivering on top of her exposed teeth. "I'm so Karkles…" she said as she buried her face into my chest. I could feel the tears soaking into my shirt. I had no idea what to do. What did she mean? What did she have to be sorry for?

"H-Hey…it's okay…it's not your fault…" And then I went back to my usual blubbering self. God, what was wrong with me. " Rez…Rez look at me." She did as I asked, little streaks of light blue still stained against her grey skin. "I don't know why you're crying. Should I have kept my mouth shut?"

Terezi dried her tears and pushed me away. "Yes you idiot, you should have just shut up and left me alone. Why did I even invite you here? God, what is wrong with me? I can't even handle myself anymore and you sir, you are the fucking problem here. I hate you Karkles, I hate you so fucking much." She jumped on me and pressed her lips to mine, much to my own surprise. This was the last thing I had expected. Before I knew it I was kissing her back, having wrapped my arms around her. She slipped her tongue between my lips and I did the same to her. I knew she was tasting my tongue, and it felt so good. She pushed me down so I was laying flat on the sofa with her on top. She had one arm around my neck and the other flat against my chest. I had mine holding her hips. We must have made out for at least five minutes, and I've got to say, those were the greatest minutes of my miserable life.

We pulled away at the same time, each of us a little shocked at what had just happened. I had no words so she spoke first. "Don't you dare fucking leave me," Terezi said as she rested her head on my chest. I looked down at the girl that I'd loved for nigh on seven years now, still trying to process whether this was real or just another fantasy. But the way she looked and the way she talked, and the words she said; I knew it was real.

"I'm not going anywhere," I said, running my fingers through her hair.

The night wasn't over though; I still didn't know why she'd asked me if I loved her. Not that I didn't appreciate it or welcome it, I was just still at odds. "Hey, Rez," I said pinching her noise softly.

She squeezed her eyelids and shook her head and looked up at me. "Yes, Karkles?" she said with a typically beautiful smile. I was lost for a second; those ruby red eyes, that perfectly pursed smile and that adventurous little tongue. If there was such a thing as perfection, it had a lot to live up to.

"You're beautiful," I managed to say after a moment. It wasn't what I meant to say, but I didn't complain.

Terezi crawled up and kissed me lightly on the cheek, nuzzling her head into my neck. "I love you, Karkles," she said. It was the first time she had said it and I grinned like such a fucking dork. She saw me and giggled and I instantly regretted it. "Cheer up, you're too idiotically cute to be angry," she said.

"Why now?" I asked. It was sudden, but I don't think I would have gotten the chance otherwise.

"Hmm?" she said.

"Why now, Rez? It's been two and a half sweeps, why now? What could have possibly inclined you to give me a chance?"

She sighed and sat up and I did the same. I could see she wasn't here, or at least her thoughts weren't. They were drifting somewhere unknown. After a minute of silence she spoke. "Do you know how long trolls live, Karkat?" It was such an odd thing to say at the time, but in retrospect it makes perfect sense.

"I don't know," I said awkwardly.

"Exactly. No one knows how long we live for; what is considered young? What is old? I could die tomorrow for all I know and all I've had to show for it is destroying my universe and ending two relationships well before their time was up. I was sitting here tonight thinking about everyone who I've ever met and I realised something. It was so obvious in front of me that I can't believe I'd never thought of it before. Out of everyone, human, troll or cherub, you were the only one who took me seriously. You listened to everything I had to say and told me to say 'fuck you' to anyone who tried to mess with me. You never asked me for anything in return, you always gave and gave and gave. And I realised; not just anyone does that for you. It takes someone special to deal with your shit and give you advice day in and day out. I understood finally that that person loved me and that…I loved him too." She turned and looked at me with a weak little smile. "I don't want to die alone, Karkat. I don't want to go out of this world knowing that I could have done this one thing right, but I didn't."

I leaned in and kissed her softly, placing my hands gently on her cheeks. My nose rubbed against hers and I looked up into her eyes and said "If you had died alone I would have joined you."

She smiled. "Really?" Terezi asked, teal coloured tears glazing her eyes over again. I nodded and she tackled me into a hug. She giggled and I smiled. Seeing her happy was the best thing. Terezi yawned and rested her head on my chest. "Thank you for existing Karkles, it means the world to me," she said drowsily. "I'm just going to rest my eyes for a minute…" She fell asleep on top of me and I knew I wasn't going back to my respiteblock that night.

I kissed her. "Sleep tight Rez," I said, before I too succumbed to sleep.