POV: Nate

Cold. I was so fucking cold.

I sat on the couch in my house… or what used to be my house. Codsworth had brought me a tattered blanket and I quickly wrapped it around me, pulling it so tightly against my skin one might think I was trying to absorb the scrap of cloth into my being. After leaving vault 111 I had frantically looked around. Looked for anyone or anything that seemed familiar. I turned quickly to see Sanctuary. The place I had once called home, now nothing more than ruins.

I didn't bother to head back down the path I ran nearly 200 years before to the vault. No, when I saw the wreckage of my old life I chaotically scrambled down the hill, scraping my hands in the process. I knew there was a bridge not even a few feet away from me to cross the small stream, but I disregarded the fact; not wanting to waste time with such trivial things. Unfortunately, I clumsily slipped in the mud and landed violently on my side with the water trickling around me trying to escape. I don't know how long I laid there. I felt like crying. I couldn't quite tell if I already was. My face was soaked from the shallow water. I finally, after what seemed like another 200 year, pulled myself up and slowly walked to the little suburb I used to live in. I did so a lot calmer, but a hell of a lot more depressed. My heart made a little jump in seeing an all to familiar robot hovering in front of my house. I ran as fast as I could to him.

Now, I sat on my couch soaking wet. Blanket wrapped around me, my head spinning, my body convulsing from what I thought was cold but knew deep inside it was from something much worse. Absolute terror. My son was stolen and my wife was dead. They shot her! They killed my wife! My beautiful fucking wife! I breathed heavily clenching my fists. I would find the bastard who put a bullet in the woman I loved.

—

Go to Diamond City, they said. It'll be fun, they said. Bullshit.

I'd been hiking my way to 'the green jewel of the Commonwealth' as Mama Murphy had called it. I know she only wanted to help me find my son, and in the long run I knew this was my best bet at doing so. However, the trek there was far from pleasurable. I had run into many of the world's newest creatures that I had never known. The worst I had run into was probably this thing called a deathclaw. Gosh I loathed the things.

Thankfully, my spirit had picked up a little since leaving the vault. Not a lot, but a little. It was nice to run into some people at Concord who weren't trying to kill me. A man I met, Preston, offered to accompany me in my travels but I decided to go alone. I needed to clear my head. Sure, I was depressed but once I discovered the radio setting on the pip-boy I looted off a dead scientist back at the vault I became extremely giddy and started singing along to the station.

I walked the streets of what I remembered to be Boston and knew I was near Fenway Park, which apparently had been fixed up into a place of civilization. I heard yelling nearby and quickly shut off my pip-boy radio.

"Agh…You open this gate right now, Danny Sullivan! I live here. You can't just lock me out!" Screamed a woman at a small speaker placed outside the gate of the park. She turned to me quickly out of shock when I approached. My heart stopped. My wife? No. No, she's dead. This was just a woman in a red trench coat. She had a green scarf around her neck and wore a newsboy cap with a little card that said 'press' on it. I quickly realized I had never met this woman but I couldn't get over how strikingly similar she looked to the woman who had meant everything to me. I shook my head trying to shake it off.

"You? You want in to Diamond City right?" she whispered. My mouth opened to say words but nothing came out. It didn't matter much though. She hushed me and told me to play along as she started making up a lie about how I was a trader from Quincy with a bunch of supplies. I started to worry. I knew on me I only had my jumpsuit, a 10mm pistol, two stimpaks, a book that belonged to my son, a couple bobby pins, and the damn tattered blanket Codsworth had given to me. What if they realized I didn't have anything to trade? I was capless. Would they not let me in? Would they kick me out? They apparently didn't feel too bad about leaving people on the streets considering the woman trying to con our way in seemed like an exile herself.

They bought it. The gate started to open when the woman turned to me again.

"Better head inside before ole' Danny catches onto the bluff." I couldn't have agreed more but I figured they were more likely to drag her out than me.

"You first."

"Wouldn't have it any other way." she said with a smirk.

I ducked my head under the still moving slow gate as I headed in behind the woman. I was a lot taller than her so she didn't have to duck much as we entered. I straightened up to see the woman was already in another argument with someone. Not the man over the speaker. This man's voice was a lot deeper and gruff. The man seemed rather pissed at her and I looked back and forth between the two as they fought. Not the smartest move on my part. The woman turned to me once again and not necessarily talking to me said "Why don't we ask the newcomer? You support the news?" The question caught me off guard. Did she mean a specific news center or just in general? I decided on a safe answer and just simply stated that I had always believed in freedom of the press. It was our first amendment right. Or it was. I wasn't sure what kind of laws, if any, these people followed.

This man, the mayor, nervously spoke to me and tried to get on my good side in hope of gaining my approval. He felt fake and his words were hollow.

"This hasn't been the friendliest welcome" I stated. This seemed to make Piper smile. Piper, at least I thought that was her name. I had heard a couple of people address her and I merely assumed. She was quite attractive and I couldn't help but advert my eyes when she smiled at me so I wouldn't blush. The mayor spoke more words but I looked back at Piper when she turned her gaze back to the mayor.

"Hello?" the mayor interrupted my daze.

"Yea? sorry." I replied back confused.

"Was there anything particular you came to our city for?"

I told him that I was trying to track somebody. He didn't need to know my business. I didn't trust him; maybe because Piper didn't trust him. Finally, he directed me to a man named Valentine who apparently was a detective in town. We ended our conversation and Piper said, "Look, I gotta go get settled in, but, um stop by my office later. I have an idea for an article you'd be perfect for." Once again I wanted to say something but lacked words. She smiled and walked away into Diamond City. One part of me didn't want to let everyone know my business and disliked the idea. The other part of me wanted to go directly to her and give her the interview. There was something about her that made me feel like I could probably trust her if need be. But she also scared me. Not because others had said she stuck her nose into things looking for the truth. I somewhat admired her determination. But because she reminded me so much of my wife. I found it either mesmerizing or difficult to look at her. There was no in between. I thought it best that I kept my distance from her.

I kept my eyes on her as I followed a short distance behind. I saw a little girl run up to her yelling her name. She was Piper's sister, Nat, as I heard Piper say. Eventually, Piper walked into a nearby building. I walked further into the city just before the little girl ran up to me.

"Free Paper to newcomers." I decided to joke with her a little. I really wanted to be good with children, especially if I find my son. I was going to be a single father.

"A free paper? Sounds like quality" I quipped. She went off about some institution and I tried my best to follow along. I thanked her for the free paper and started to read a few lines as I headed to Valentine's office.

—

I'd come a long way since first walking into Diamond city. I found out Nick Valentine had been kidnapped, rescued him, broke into a man's house, and tracked the man who killed my wife all the way to an abandoned fortress. I never liked killing people, i've done it many times from my days in the military to random raiders in the wasteland. This was different. Kellogg, the man who killed my wife, I didn't kill out of fear for my safety or the greater good. I killed Kellogg out of pure anger. His death was the first time I ever felt like a killer. I knew what I did had to be done, but I still felt empty inside. Killing this man did not make me feel any better. My son was still missing and my wife was still dead. I had been broken by this man and some part of me thought ending his life would piece me back together again. I felt nothing. If anything I felt worse. This little escapade took a little under a month due to constant attacks, saving Nick, the need to set up camp come night fall, looking for another scent Dogmeat could track— It was all too slow and there wasn't really anything I could do about it. Now even more time had passed than however long it had been that I was cryogenically frozen the second time and I was nowhere near finding my son. All that I had accomplished was confirm my suspicion that the institute had taken my boy.

I took Kellogg's gun off his body and used it as my own, as somewhat of a reminder to myself not to forget what he had done; to fuel my rage and keep my hope alive that i'd find my son.

Nick approached me.

"We're in the weeds, here. Time to take a step back. Bring in some fresh eyes. Only person I know willing to snoop up the institute's tail feathers is Piper, the reporter in Diamond City. I say we head her way. Talk this through." he said.

"Uh, why Piper exactly?" I said a little nervously. I met her prior to Valentine and oddly felt a connection with her besides the fact that I myself had only said two words to the woman. Still, I didn't like the idea of hanging around her. Not when she made me too damn nervous. "Is it really necessary?" I added.

"Only if you want to find the institute. Why? Got an issue with the press?" He said raising one eyebrow.

"No, not at all… never mind. Let's just head to Diamond City and find her."

"Alright…" he said a little confused and suspiciously.

I hadn't seen Piper in a month and I wasn't too sure I was ready to see her again. It didn't matter though. I wasn't about to let my nerves get the best of me. The journey back only took about two days. This time I was determined to trudge back as quickly as possible. We traveled nonstop day and night and only stopped once when I realized I was out of water. I had to go scavenging for some in a nearby abandoned house. Nick had no issues with our non-stop traveling being a synth and I had sent Dogmeat back to Sanctuary. I wasn't actually sure if he understood what I wanted him to do but I hoped for the best. The only thing that slowed us down this time was myself and I hated my own human limits.

We arrived at Diamond City at dark. I was exhausted. I had barely slept on the way back. I think the only rest I had was a small nap on an uncomfortable mattress abandoned in a makeshift shack. Nick pestered me a couple of times to eat, sleep, and do all the things humans need to do to survive but I thanked him and ignored his advice. I was determined to get back to Diamond City. If Piper was the one chance I had to find my son I was going to take it. I didn't care if she haunted me like the ghost of my dead wife, I needed her.

I walked up to the little building with 'Publick Occurrences' written in green letters on the roof. I looked at the red door and thought about knocking. I bit my bottom lip and breathed in preparing to make contact with the wood. Valentine stared at me for a second, rolled his glowing yellow eyes, and knocked abruptly. He quickly stepped behind me smiling and pushing me forward as I panicked for a second. I turned around and argued with him in hushed tones. Piper quickly opened the door to see neither of us looking at her and or paying attention to the person we came to see in the first place.

"um, everything okay here?" she asked pointing quickly between me and Nick. Nick fell silent and nudged me in the arm.

"uh, I—Hi Piper"

"Ooh! Did you come to do that interview I asked you about" She said excitedly. She laughed as she said, "took you long enough"

"oh, uh no actually. Sorry."

"No worries. But hey you owe me an interview one of these days" she said as she bopped my nose with her finger. I looked at my feet and blushed hard.

"So how can I be of assistance?" She asked while summoning us inside.

"We need help, Piper. This man named Kellogg kidnapped my son, but that wasn't all. He was working with the institute. He… he gave them Shaun…" I stated but trailed off without really finishing my thoughts.

"The institute…oh boy." she sighed. "I've been investigating them for over a year now… I'm really sorry." Her voice went soft and quiet at the last piece of her sentence as if trying to avoid hurting me.

"No one really knows where the institute actually is, or how to get in" Nick said blatantly.

"Well… there's one person who must know, right? The guy who just handed them Shaun." Piper muttered at first but became more confident with her words.

"Kellogg…huh" Nick spoke to himself. I looked directly in Piper's eye for what I believe was the first time. They were a beautiful hazel green and I almost got distracted as I told her, "Whatever you're thinking, it doesn't matter. He's dead."

"Huh, so murderer kidnapper get his brains blown out? Might be a happy ending if there wasn't still the biggest story in the commonwealth to solve." Piper joked.

"hmm.. gets his brains blown out—his brain." Nick said as if he was onto something. Piper looked at him sort of funny before replying, "You're talking crazy here Nick. Dead men tell no tales remember?"

"There's this place called the Memory Den over in Good Neighbor. They specialize in the human mind. If anyone could get a dead brain to sing, it'll be Doctor Amari, the mind behind the memories."

"Do you actually think this'll work?" I asked rather not confidently.

"Yes. Hmm…I guess we're going to need a piece of Kellogg's brain." Nick thought aloud.

"Jesuuus, Nick…Gross! Seriously?!"

"Unfortunately…" he replied.

"Greaaat, who doesn't love harvesting brain like a zombie. Lucky I already have some." I said sarcastically.

"What? Why do you already have some?" Piper asked horrified.

"Oh…I..uh" Thinking back, I realized how weird it was that I did.

"Well, I noticed he had a cybernetic implant. I thought it might be useful to have it looked into…"

"Well, I have to head over to the memory den a bit earlier than you so I don't spring all this on Doctor Amari. Meet me over at Good Neighbor whenever's best for you. Take Piper. I'm afraid this is where we part ways for now." Said Nick. He made sure She wasn't looking before he turned to me and gave me a wink. What the hell did that mean? Take Piper? Why? She's just a reporter.

"What? Why? I'll just go with you." I said persistently.

"No, I have to leave and talk to Doctor Amari before hand. Just go with Piper."

"No it's fine. I'll just head there by myself."

"Whoa! Hey! Right here. You seriously hate me that much" She laughed kind of sadly as if trying to cheer herself up.

"What? No no no no! That not what I… I didn't mean… I like you a lot… I mean you're very nice. I just, uh meant—I didn't want to bother you with my shit, you barely know me." I finally managed to spit out.

"Well, one, getting involved in other people's business is how I make a living you know? Two, I guess this gives me an excuse to get to know you a little better." She smiled and I smirked at her.

"Uh, you know as an interviewee.. for my article"

"Of course." I said still smiling.

"Well i'm going to head out." Nick said with a cheeky grin plastered on his face. He slowly walked backwards out the door.

"Guess it's just you and me now." Piper said seeing the door close. I didn't respond. Instead I started planning out loud. "I'll head to the market and buy some ammo. Do you have a gun? What am I saying of course you do. This is the wasteland. How far away is Good Neighbor? I want to make sure to pack accordingly. I—"

"Whoa! Blue calm down." Piper said laughing.

"Blue?" I asked confused

"You're clothing…"

"huh? oh. This thing?" I said clutching at the fabric which proved to be difficult being so tight against my skin. "I almost forgot I was wearing it to be honest. It was the jumpsuit they gave us at vault 111"

"Vault 111? Is that where you came from?"

"Mmm, according to the big letters on my back yea. Wait— you're trying to interview me right now aren't you""

"What?" she said trying to sound flabbergasted. "Psssh… no…. Okay, yes. But why not? Can't I interview you real quick? I know you lost your son…" She started scribbling things down on a notepad she seemed to pull from thin air. " An I know you're from Vault 1-1…" She slowly mouthed out each number as she wrote them down. "But what I don't know is how your son was kidnapped? Where is your uh, wife exactly?"

"Not today, Piper" I said quietly. The mention of my wife brought my spirits down and I felt all the more awkward being in the same room as Piper. I don't know why but I started to feel irritated at thinking about my wife and Piper in the same thought.

"Oh, come on blue" She wouldn't give. I tried to joke my way out of it but I think it came out more snippy than I hoped.

"Alright, Here's your headline: Local man says no."

"Ugh, gonna be like that huh?" she said, sounding a little hurt. "smartass…" I barely heard her say. I felt bad but I was in no shape to do that interview. "Fine" She continued. "We'll do this later, but I want that interview blue."

"we'll leave in a few hours" I said coldly. At this point I just didn't feel like talking. I was a soldier. I knew how to withhold information. Piper just looked at me. I felt uncomfortable just standing there and I didn't dare sit down without an invitation. Piper said nothing. "I'll wait outside, then buy some ammo right before the shops close." It was getting rather late. I knew shopkeepers would often begrudgingly give you discounts come nightfall since all they want to do is go back inside they didn't argue about price to much. I put my hand on the door, opened it, looked back at Piper who was just staring at me. Then I left. I sat in the middle of the market place on a stool in front of this little noodle shop. The robot working the shop spoke little to absolutely no english and from what i've heard the only word it actually knows is 'yes'. It said something to me in Japanese. Probably asking if I wanted something to eat most likely, but I didn't feel like eating, I didn't feel like anything but heading to the memory den. I sat there for a long time just waiting. I didn't like not being able to do anything. I felt like any time not looking for Shaun was time wasted. I scanned Diamond City for a while in my stool before I felt my eyes getting heavy. I shook my head to fight off sleep but I found myself slumping my back against the counter and dozing off in the tiny chair. Next thing I know I felt a hand on my shoulder gently wake me.

"Blue…"