AN: I know I haven't updated my other story for awhile (but I haven't abandoned it altogether just yet). I just have too many ideas, and I haven't decided which way to go just yet (but I'm working on it, I promise!)
But I have been playing around with an idea in my head for awhile now…and thought it'd be the perfect time. I've been there (sort of), and so I wanted to see what would happen if one of the Camp Rock characters had to deal with what I went through. And the holidays aren't always happy for everyone (that's why I came up with the title). And not enough fanfics are written about the characters I chose, so…here it is. I hope everyone who reads this reviews (hint, hint).
Special AN: HAPPY NEW YEAR, EVERYONE!!!!
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Camp Rock characters. But the plot's all mine. At least, I think it is…
Jason sighed, hugging his knees to his chest. It was New Year's Eve, almost midnight, and Shane had suggested that they have a New Year's Eve party at his house. Mitchie had offered to put up the decorations, and Caitlyn would oversee the music, while Nate would be in the kitchen, preparing the refreshments.
So no one noticed when Jason walked outside and down the long, winding driveway. He'd been out there for only a few minutes, and he shivered, mentally cursing himself for forgetting to put on a coat.
"I'm so stupid," Jason muttered to himself. "I never should've come here in the first place."
He thought back to when Shane had first invited them all to his place for the holidays. He knew Mitchie would go, and Nate and Caitlyn would be there. And as always, he felt like the fifth wheel.
Tears slipped down his cheeks as he felt even more alone than before. It wasn't just that he was the only single person in his circle of friends. It was the way he felt whenever the crowd screamed, "I LOVE YOU, SHANE GRAY!", or "Marry me, Nate!" But they never screamed for him. He was just the other member of Connect 3. The one no one ever cared about.
He had a family. He had parents, and siblings. But to his parents, his siblings were so much more successful than he was. They didn't go into music. They weren't the ones throwing their lives away, or their time chasing after some silly dream. They made something of themselves. They were straight-A students. They were on every club that mattered. They were popular, smart, everything that a parent could dream of. They were perfect. And he definitely wasn't. It wasn't just that he happened to be in a family of overachieving geniuses. It was that he never seemed to do anything right. And now, everything that Jason had experienced had come crashing down all around him. There was only one thing left for him to do now. And he wasn't going to mess up this time.
"This is it," Jason murmured, putting his hand into his pocket. He felt around for the little box he had put there, and took it out. "Just what I need to forget…"
He stared at the box for a moment, then opened it carefully. Inside were a number of pills, every one of which could take away his pain and make him forget his problems, even if it was only for a little while. He'd considered jumping off a bridge, or putting a gun to his head, or a knife to slit his throat, or even hanging himself, but all of those ways seemed too scary for him to even imagine, let alone do.
"Here goes nothing," Jason murmured, raising the pills to his mouth. Just then, the fireworks went off.
"Happy effin' New Year," Jason spat out bitterly to himself. He noticed something moving, and quickly shoved the pills back into the box and out of sight.
He saw his friends outside, not far from where he was, admiring the fireworks.
"Jason?" Mitchie said, catching a glimpse of him in the shadows. "Hey, why don't you come see the fireworks with us? Aren't they pretty?"
"Just leave me alone," Jason replied, not wanting to talk to them at the moment.
"Jason, what's wrong? Did something happen?" Caitlyn asked, wondering what could be bothering him.
"I said, leave me alone," Jason repeated, this time more firmly.
"Look, if there's something bugging you, maybe we could help," Nate offered helpfully.
"I'm fine, OK?" Jason snapped, his eyes piercing theirs. "Just go away and pretend like I'm not here."
"But you are here," Shane pointed out. "I can see you…" He pretended to wince as Mitchie playfully slapped him.
"Damn it, Shane, just shut up!" Jason exploded. "Go away and leave me alone!"
"OK…?" Shane held his hands up in surrender and backed away, his eyes wide with shock.
"You heard the man," Nate said, knowing when to leave well enough alone.
"We'd better go," Caitlyn said, not sure whether to stay or go. "Mitchie?"
"I'll be there in a second," Mitchie said. "You guys go on ahead without me."
"Suit yourself," Caitlyn shrugged. "I'll save you some hot chocolate with marshmallows."
"Thanks, Caitlyn," Mitchie grinned. She kissed Shane, then watched him and her friends go back in the house.
Mitchie waited until she and Jason were finally alone. "Jason, what's wrong?"
"Nothing," Jason sighed, miserable.
"Something's wrong, and I can't help you if you don't tell me what's going on," Mitchie said, going over to him. She put a hand on his shoulder, and Jason pulled away.
"Just leave me alone, Mitchie," Jason said, the tears falling again.
Mitchie didn't say anything, but wrapped her arms around Jason and hugged him tightly. At first, he stiffened, almost as if he were going to pull away. Then he melted into her embrace and hugged her back.
"I'm sorry for whatever's bothering you, and I hope it goes away soon," Mitchie said, still holding Jason in her arms. Her heart broke as she heard him sobbing. "Jase, what is it? What's wrong?"
"Everything," Jason sniffled. "I see you guys, and you're with Shane, and Nate's with Caitlyn…"
"Jason, it's only a matter of time before you find the girl of your dreams. And whoever you choose, she'll be one lucky girl to have a guy like you," Mitchie pulled back and smiled at her friend.
"I don't know. I'm not the talented one, like Nate. I can't play every instrument, or write songs, and I can't sing like Shane, or attract attention like he can…I'm just stupid, and useless, and…" Jason looked defeated.
"No, you're not. You're not stupid, or useless, or whatever negative thing you think you are," Mitchie said.
"Yes, I am. I just don't fit in. Anywhere. Not in the band, or with you guys. I'm just a guy who's obsessed with birdhouses. And birds. And do you know why?" Jason asked.
"No, why?" Mitchie looked puzzled.
"Because they're free. And every single one of them belongs somewhere. With another bird, with another group of birds. They're never alone. They always have someone who needs them. But not me. No one needs me," Jason said sadly.
"You really think so?" Mitchie said. "Because I know a few people who need someone exactly like you. Someone who's always positive, someone who doesn't care what other people think, someone who does what he wants to make other people happy. And I thought that someone was you, but the Jason I see right now isn't like that."
"That's not me," Jason insisted. "I only act that way so people will like me, but they really don't. They never do. It's always Shane or Nate. I might as well be invisible. Why should I care anymore? No one cares about me. And why should they? I'm nothing special."
"That's not true, Jason," Mitchie said. "I care about you. I know what it's like not to fit in. Remember when it was my first summer at Camp Rock, and I pretended to be someone I wasn't just so I could be popular? And what happened then? I ended up hurting Shane, and Caitlyn, and especially my mom. So don't tell me I don't know what you're feeling, because I do."
"That's easy for you to say. You have Shane now. And as usual, I have no one," Jason said bitterly. "No one wants a birdbrain for a friend. And Shane and Nate aren't really my friends. They're just there because some record label thought we were good in a band together. But they never want to hang out with me or do what I want to do. And you and Caitlyn aren't really my friends either. You're their girlfriends, so that's the only reason why you'd ever talk to me. You wouldn't understand."
"You know what, Jason?" Mitchie said. "I do understand, better than you think. I've been in your position, and I've learned that if you want to have friends, you need to be a friend first. And do you know how to be a good friend? You could start by helping me set up decorations, or help Caitlyn with the music, or whatever else that needs to be done. If you're interested in what other people do, people will be interested in what you want to do."
"I don't know," Jason replied. "I'm a disaster in the kitchen, and I'm not great with mixing music, and me and decorations don't get along. The last time I tried to put the tinsel on the tree, I ended up tying myself into a great big knot."
"That's OK, you don't have to be good at those things. You could do something else, like taste Shane's cookies," Mitchie said thoughtfully. "On second thought, don't. I may love Shane, but he can't bake. Not yet, anyway. What about helping Caitlyn choose the music? I'm sure you'd be great at getting everyone into the holiday spirit. And speaking of the holidays, now's the perfect time to start over, don't you think? A new year ahead…a clean slate to start with? It's never too late to make friends. And you never know…you might find a girlfriend sooner than you think. Just keep trying. Don't give up, and eventually you'll will."
"Who'd want me?" Jason wondered. "I'm not as funny as Shane is, or as cute as Nate is, or…"
"Any girl would be lucky to have you," Mitchie insisted. "You always make me laugh, and cheer me up when I'm down. And you always hug me when I need one. You're a great friend, Jason, and I'm happy you're one of my best friends."
"I am?" Jason looked surprised. "I didn't know anyone thought of me as a best friend. Or even a great one."
"You are," Mitchie nodded encouragingly. "You helped me more than you ever thought possible. And now it's my turn to help you. But you need to take a chance, and try to be the sweet, sensitive, caring guy I know you are. Then other people will see what an awesome guy you are, and you'll make lots of friends, and girlfriends, that way."
"I never thought of it that way before," Jason said, getting up. "Maybe you're right. And thanks. I think I will go down and hang around a bit. Maybe even help pick the music. And maybe Santa will give me a girlfriend this year. Even if Christmas is over, and I already wished for a birdhouse…Oh snap."
"What?" Mitchie wondered what was wrong now.
"If I told you what I wished for, does it mean I won't get it?" Jason looked scared. "Because I really want one, and…"
"You'll get it, don't worry," Mitchie smiled in relief, trying not to laugh. "C'mon, let's go do something. Together." Mitchie held back a laugh at Jason's last response. "Oh, and Jase?"
"Yeah?" Jason said curiously.
"Let me help you with those," Mitchie smiled as she stuck her hand in Jason's pocket and took the bottle out. "You won't be needing them anymore." She hurled it into the street, where it rolled out of sight.
"How'd you…?" Jason's eyes widened as Mitchie grinned.
"Been there, almost done that," Mitchie answered simply. "But I had a friend who was there for me at the right time, and been there ever since."
"Who?" Jason said.
"You," Mitchie answered.
"I was? Are you sure?" Jason insisted.
"Yes, I'm sure. When I was thinking about my own problems, I remembered how you used to make me laugh, and you always had the biggest smile on your face. You never let anything get you down. You always gave me a hug whenever I needed one, and you were a great friend to me. Even when I'd hurt Shane and Caitlyn, you were always there for me. You always listened to me, and even though you didn't always tell me what to do, you made me feel better about myself. And it helped take my pain away. Even for just a little bit. And for that, I'll always be grateful to you. In fact, if you ever feel down, just come and talk to me. I'll be here for you to talk to whenever you need it."
"I did? Really?" Jason looked surprised. "I didn't know that. And I'll have to take you up on your offer."
"Yup, you definitely did," Mitchie said. She hugged Jason again. "And it's good to hear the old Jason again. Now let's go back to the party. Deal?"
"Deal," Jason smiled, giving her a quick hug. "Thanks for being my friend, Mitchie."
"No problem," Mitchie grinned back. "And thanks for being mine," Mitchie squeezed his hand lightly as she led him back to the party.
"Hey guys," Jason said. Nate and Shane were arguing, as Shane had once again burned the cookies.
"For the last time, you need to set it at 350 degrees for 10 minutes, not 700 degrees for 5 minutes!" Nate exploded.
"It's faster that way though. You know, since 350 degrees for 10 minutes is the same as 700 degrees for 5 minutes, right? So if you double the temperature, you can cut the cooking time in half," Shane finished, thinking that was a perfectly logical conclusion.
"IT…DOESN'T…WORK…THAT…WAY!!!!" Nate sputtered angrily. "Not if you want to burn down the entire neighborhood!"
"OK, OK," Shane surrendered. "I give up. You're impossible! I can't learn anything from you without you yelling at me!"
"I'm impossible?" Nate's voice rose dramatically. "I'd have better luck teaching Jason how to bake cookies, and he'd eat them all before I can bake them."
"Hey, Jase," Caitlyn said, picking up a couple CDs to distract him from the argument. "Wanna help me with the music? I can't decide which of these to play first."
"Go on," Mitchie nudged Jason, smiling at him.
"You should definitely play this first," Jason said, after carefully looking at both of them.
"That's what I was thinking," Caitlyn said. "Oh snap, I forgot the mistletoe."
"I'll get it!" Shane called out as he passed by them, Nate right behind him. He glanced back at Nate, and yelled, "And by the way, you're a horrible teacher. I QUIT!"
"No, I quit first!" Nate grumbled, looking cross. "And just so you know, you're a horrible student."
"Keep telling yourself that, and maybe you'll believe it," Shane shot back. He ducked as Nate threw his ruined cookies at him.
"FOOD FIGHT!" Jason said, excited.
"NO!" Shane and Mitchie yelled. "My parents would kill me if we had one."
"Drop those cookies!" Mitchie commanded, as Caitlyn had armed herself with cookies ready to let fly at Shane. She changed the subject once Caitlyn had reluctantly given in. "Jason, why don't you put the mistletoe up?"
"Me? Really? You want me to put it up?" Jason said, surprised that someone would want him to help.
"Sure, and I'll help you," Caitlyn said, going over with Jason.
Jason put it up, and Mitchie grinned at him.
"What?" Jason looked confused.
"Happy New Year, Jason," Mitchie said, reaching up and planting a kiss on his cheek.
"Happy New Year, Mitchie," Jason said, smiling. "Group hug?"
"NO!" Shane said, looking repulsed.
Meanwhile, Caitlyn had snuck silently toward Shane, with a mischievous glint in her eye and some cookies in her hands.
Nate couldn't answer. He was too busy laughing at Shane, and his girlfriend stalking her way toward her unsuspecting victim.
"HEY, IT'S NOT THAT FUNNY!" Shane roared, finally spotting Caitlyn grinning at him evilly with a load of cookies in her hands. "Call your girlfriend off!"
"Yes, it is," Nate managed to say before bursting into laughter again. "And what's the magic word?"
"JUST DO IT!" Shane roared, picking up speed. Caitlyn followed, trying not to drop them.
"No, that's not it. And besides, this is too funny to watch," Nate roared with laughter as Shane glared at him.
"Group hug," Mitchie said to Jason, opening her arms wide. "Even if it is just the two of us."
"YAY!" Jason hugged Mitchie so hard he lifted her off the ground.
"Look, Jase, I'm flying!" Mitchie spread her arms out, and Jason twirled her around the room.
"Guys, look out!" Nate yelled. But it was too late.
CRASH!
Jason and Mitchie crashed into Mrs. Gray, who was bringing out the drinks. Glass shattered everywhere, and the drinks spilled all over the place. Caitlyn and Shane slipped, and Caitlyn let go of the cookies, most of which ended up in her and Shane's hair.
"Oops, I'm so sorry, Mrs. Gray," Jason looked scared for a few moments, waiting to see how she would respond. "I didn't mean to…"
"JASON!!!!" Shane roared. "I'm gonna get you!"
"AHHHH!!!!" Jason screamed, trying to run away. But he managed only to slip and slide on the juice.
"Shane," Mrs. Gray warned. Her son fell silent, catching his mother's look. "That's OK, Jason," Mrs. Gray said, grabbing hold of Jason before he fell down. "It's just an accident. And accidents do happen. I'll go get a broom and a dustpan to clean this all up."
"That's OK, Mom. Jason made the mess, he should clean it up," Shane told Jason.
"Do I have to?" Jason pouted.
"It's OK, you're our guest. Why don't you go and enjoy the party? Shane, you can help me." Mrs. Gray said, trying not to laugh as she saw her son's expression.
"I'll help too, Mrs. Gray," Mitchie said, coming to Shane's defense.
"Thank you, sweetie. That's very nice of you," Mrs. Gray beamed. Mitchie was perfect for her son, and she couldn't be happier for them.
After Shane and Mitchie had finished cleaning everything, they went back to their friends.
"Happy New Year!" Nate said, coming over and hugging Caitlyn, who blushed as he held her tight.
"Happy New Year, everyone!" Caitlyn squealed, then detached herself from Nate, and went to turn the music up.
"Happy New Year, Mitchie," Shane said, going over and kissing Mitchie for what seemed like forever.
"Happy New Year, Shane," Mitchie murmured, once they'd run out of breath. She rested her head on Shane's shoulder for a moment, then looked over at Jason. "Happy New Year, Jason!"
"Happy New Year, Mitchie!" Jason said happily. "And Happy New Year, guys!"
"Ahem," Caitlyn cleared her throat loudly, looking pointedly at Jason.
"And girls," Nate added quickly, shooting a glance at Jason.
"We're not girls, we're women," Caitlyn retorted. "Right, Mitchie?"
"Um…" Mitchie muttered, glancing at her friend, then her boyfriend, who had burst out laughing.
Caitlyn shot a death glare at Shane. "Don't even start with me…" Caitlyn warned. "Or I'll have to get you." She made a fist and clenched it tight.
"Oh no…Caitlyn's gonna get me! ARRGGHHHH!" Shane started running away again, and Caitlyn started chasing him.
"Here we go again," Mitchie said, rolling her eyes and smiling at Nate.
"Come on, maybe we should help Jason," Mitchie suggested.
"With what?" Nate wondered.
"The birdhouse he wants," Mitchie said softly, so only Nate could hear her.
"I guess," Nate looked less than thrilled at the idea.
"Can I make a birdhouse for you?" Jason asked Nate.
"No thanks, Jason. I really don't need a birdhouse," Nate said, politely declining Jason's offer.
"But birdhouses are cool! And they're really pretty, but not as pretty as the birds. And there's so many of them…"
"Jase! I…don't…want…a…birdhouse," Nate said through gritted teeth.
"You can make me one, Jason," Mitchie offered. "Since that's what friends do. Accept each other's gifts. Right, Nate?" She looked over at Nate, who shook his head. "Right, Nate?" Mitchie repeated, this time more forcefully.
"Fine," Nate spat out reluctantly.
"YAY! I'm making a birdhouse. I'm making a birdhouse…Wait, I don't know how to make one. Can you help me?" Jason asked Nate and Mitchie.
"We'd love to. Right, Nate?" Mitchie asked sweetly.
"Absolutely," Nate said, his voice sounding strangled.
"Aww," Mitchie grinned. "I bet Shane and Caitlyn would love one too."
"You think so?" Jason said.
"I know they would. After all, you know what kind of birdhouse birds would like best. You're a bird expert," Mitchie complimented Jason.
"Yeah, I guess I am," Jason said proudly. "And I'll make this the best New Year ever! For my best friends in the whole wide world!"
Jason's POV: This'll be the best New Year's ever! I can't wait to see what happens!