Chapter 1

It didn't take time for the Normandy's best tech expert to salvage damanged bits of wreckage to get a transformer up and running again. most circuits had fried, and had to be replaced, but that was no problem for the quarian. The most prominent problem was that the Normandy's non-critical functions had been re-routed for emergency landing and now she had no way to get inside the med bay for antihistamines and anibiotics for her suit tears. Typically her suit was built to automatically deploy the drugs she needed to fight infection, but it had been too torn up from the partical beam attack and removed many of her functions. James had volunteered to try and strong-arm the door open to no avail. She took the opportunity to try and get some power restored to some parts of the Normandy while she waited, but her work slowed by the second as fever set in. It was becoming too uncomfortable to work and James had begun noticing her trying to wipe away at her forehead; obviously in vain with her cracked visor in the way.

"I'm working on it, Tali."

"Keelah, just break the window...I'd rather not die, thank you very much."

She wiped once more at her forehead and let out a frustrated growl. James cracked his knuckles and brought it down on the already cracked window, finishing the job that the crash landing had failed to do. Tali clumsily made her way over to the low window, James helping her through so she could reach the meds she needed. She obviously knew what she needed, and Dr. Chakwas was still down for the count. She wasn't going to be able to help her for a good while still. James watched her for a few moments before picking up some supplies for the wounded in the upper floors of the Normandy. He didn't know really what to get besides bandages, wound washes, and painkillers, but he figured it was better than nothing. Their medi-gel had definitely run dry in the middle of the war, his anyways, and he definitely wanted more of that stuff in his possession. Sheperd made sure that everyone had more than enough when going on field, but they could never have anticipated that they would actually live through it.

Live through it...

James watched Tali push pills through her suit mouth and take a few more items in her arms. "I'm going to change suits."

"Lola's really gone, isn't she?"

Live through it. There's no way she could have. Joker had tried everything that he could and Garrus...poor bastard, he thought. The guy had come in covered in his own blue blood calling out for Shepard while choking all the while on his vital fluids...

"If she is alive, she'll be dead in no time. Unless a frigate happens to be passing through the near the reaper weapon, she's...Keelah, I don't want to think about it. If she's alive...if she's alive, then there's no way to reach her..."

"Might as well be darkspace." James finished, earning a surprised gasp from the quarian. "That was unnecessary."

"It's true."

"That doesn't mean you have to say it like that. Have some tact." Kaidan approached the med bay window and leaned against the wall, crossing his arms out of sheer annoyance.

"Yeah well...whatever." It was an act of hopelessness. He knew he shouldn't have said it like that, but it was how it came out. As sorry as he was about it, Kaidan was right. He didn't have to say it like that. "Sorry, Tali."

"I'd like to see you say that to Garrus and get away with it." The room fell silent at the mention of the turian. It was true. Garrus was a turian soldier through-and-through, and if he heard James mention anything about finding his Shepard dead...well...it wouldn't have ended well.

"Vakarian's getting some rest. After all the bleeding he's done, he's in no condition to move around. I'm not afraid of a wounded turian."

"You should be..." Tali muttered under her breath, fixing the medicine bottles in her arms. James was upset, but that didn't mean he had to take it out on their commander. Ex-commander. She started making her way out, her mind starting to haze as the fever took a stronger grip on her. She needed to change into her spare suit and rest but her mind, as much as she wanted to find Shepard's body, was focused on Rannoch. Her hand briefly laid on Kaidan's arm as she passed him, earning a nod. What happened to the volunteered quarians who had the geth jump start their immune systems? Could their software be salvaged? If not, was it a good enough advantage to get them started on their homeworld? Were they able to farm and eat that food or would they still be on imported foods? So many questions, but no way to contact home. It was the worst feeling a highly social species like the quarians could feel- severed.

Garrus had managed to get his omni-tool to start working. The power blast had scrambled it almost to bits, but he had done it. His armor, for the first time that anyone could remember, had been removed only due to the fact that it had to be. It had been reduced to shards and slivers with the blast and honestly, now that the world was no longer in danger, he needed to feel the sort of weight that his armor gave him relieved from his shoulders. No longer was the world resting on his shoulders, or Tali's, or Shepards. Tali had done exceedingly well beside him during the final hours on Earth. Shepard wanted a team that she was familiar with since the beginning. She could have brought anyone else, but she was hellbent on bringing the two of them. They hadn't left her behind, they trusted her through hell and suicide and back. The reapers, the collectors, the Leviathans...she could have relied on anyone she wanted. But she chose them. It had to do with the elevator talks, he was sure. Definitely. He let out a ragged breath, wiping the blue blood at the corner of his mouth, and tried fiddling around with his omni-tool more. He didn't know why, in truth, Shepard brought him along or Tali, for that matter. There had to be a reason. Why would she have brought him along if he wasn't allowed to follow her into that beacon? Worse yet, why would he bring Tali, a newly administered admiral, respected among her people, important to geth work, young...too damn young, mentally, for his liking to be involved with such a war. Then again, there was no such thing as being too young for a war that would involve the enslavement of every sapient race...

Another sigh. He was through with thinking. He wished he had less time to think; more action. He needed it. He needed his mind to be somewhere else and not-

"No matter what happens here, you know I love you. I always will."

"Shepard I...love you, too..."

"GO!"

An all too familiar voice played from his omni-tool. His blood ran cold and he stared at it for a few moments, his heart thundering in his chest. The audio-recording from their last mission together. Her voice resonated amidst the gunfire. His hand raised to his chest in remembrance of the blast that burnt a hole straight through his armor and melted his skin. Although her voice chilled him, he had to hear it again. His

"No matter what happens here, you know I love you. I always will."

"Shepard I...love you, too..."

"GO!"

Both his hands covered his face. He should have gone with her. She wouldn't be missing then. MIA, KIA, it didn't matter...he could have been either of those with her instead of left stranded on whatever planet they were on now, completely dissasociated with the rest of the galaxy, unable to call even his own home, not knowing whether or not anyone he loved was still alive-

"I miss her too." A hand rested on his shoulder, his face pulling back in a wince. No one could have a softer touch than an asari, for many obvious reasons, and Garrus couldn't be upset about it. He took Liara's hand in his own, frowning as much as a turian could frown, and shook his hand. "You don't understand, Liara...I was right there...I let her slip through my fingers...would you have done the same?" The asari's head turned away, unable to answer him. "Shepard can be...very persuasive."

"But she wasn't your girlfriend. You didn't let go of your love."

"Garrus...I'm so sorry. We can always try and find her body. That could be some sort of consolation."

"What, like a consolation prize? Congradulations, Garrus Vakarian, for your efforts in almost saving the universe, your consolation prize is a dead girlfriend! Now, does that sound fair to you? I think it's-"

"Enough, Garrus." Liara sounded every syllable, anger growing in her voice. "I get it, you feel like a complete wreck, but going about it the way you are won't change the fact that you couldn't do anything in the shape you were in. The shape you are in. She saw that, Garrus, and as much as she wanted you to be there, you would have died if Dr. Chakwas didn't give you emergency first aid, do you understand? Thinking the way you are only insults Shepard's decision to save your life."

"Shepard..." He sighed, "Mae...made the right decision..." He concluded, Liara giving him a nod. "Yes. She did."

Garrus wasn't a fan of his pity party, but he wanted her. He wanted his love. He wanted Mae Shepard, alliance commander. He wanted her touch, her taste, her scent...

He wanted her, damn it!

Joker watched everyone trying to piece themselves together. It didn't take long for him to become bitter. Everyone was mourning the loss of their loved ones, yet no one realized yet that EDI was offline. Her software was stored in the ship, but would she still be her? Her husk sat in her usual co-pilot chair beside him, but was nothing but that-a husk. "Just wait, EDI. I'll get you back, you hear me? I know you backed yourself up somewhere deep in the systems...you can't just die on me, you hear me, EDI? I know you're still there." Joker fought back the tears threatening to spill out of his eyes as he worked on some of the backup systems. There was always a hope to restore her. So long as the ship could come back online, he could restore her, right? EDI controlled a majority of the ship. It was too easy to give up on her. Way too easy to give up on an automaton. She wasn't just a thing to be discarded. Not a chance in hell.

And just like that, the engines roared to life. Engineering had done their job. Normandy was back online. A unanimous cheer echoed throughout the ship. Now the next part was to go down into EDI's AI core and hopefully turn that back on. Joker's eyes flickered over to EDI's body and then back to his left, seeing a blue light flickering and spiraling softly where EDI's glyph hologram used to be. She was there. He just knew it.

AN: I've been toying with this idea for a few months now. This won't be a very long story, just a progress update I guess. The ending of Mass Effect itself left a lot unanswered and I've been dissatisfied about it. At least I can wrap it up like this for myself.