Author's Note: Many thanks to my beta LadyDragon4, who convinced me to watch the new Doctor Who AND inspired me by writing her own Doctor Who fanfic YEARS before I did. I've only seen Season One so far, and I know I'll love the Tenth Doctor, everybody does it seems like, but oh how I'll miss the Ninth Doctor. I had to write a quick story while I was still in mourning about it. Alternate Universe? Alternate Ending? Missing Scene? Whatever you like really, near the end of Parting of the Ways.
Regeneration snapped down his spine and burned into his hands, combining with the lingering energy of the Time Vortex to create a pain he wouldn't have minded peeling off his skin to get away from. From somewhere very far away he heard Rose scream.
"Doctor!"
"Stay away!" He watched her stumble to a stop, saw how much she wanted to go to him even as scared as she was, and loved her for it. For that and other things.
And what a great idiot am I, he thought, that I never thought to tell her before now.
"Doctor...tell me what's goin on.."
He winced, holding his arms around his chest as if it could stop Regeneration for a few more minutes, just a few, all I'd need..he shook his head to clear it. Focus, idiot..
"I absorbed all the energy of the Time Vortex, an no one's meant to do that." He sucked in a deep breath, closing his eyes against another surge. He looked at her, decided to just tell her without the window dressing, no time for it anyway.
"Every cell in my body's dyin."
She was panicking, he could see her barely hold it together. "Can't you do something?"
"Yeah, I'm doin it now." Cheerful, keep it cheerful. No need to frighten her more than's necessary. Wish I had just a little...just a little more time.. "Time Lords have this little trick, it's sort of a way of cheatin death. Except.." Deep breath. "It means I'm gonna change..."
He almost couldn't say it, hadn't known before now how hard it was going to be.
"..and I'm not gonna see you again. Not like this, not with this daft old face." He tried to smile, but he saw the words hit her. The desperation was contagious, and he couldn't leave her with anything, there just wasn't time, no time left, just a minute, I only need...
His hands clenched into fists, he closed his eyes, heard her start to cry. More time, just..I only need...
"I NEED," he shouted, "A MINUTE!"
The shout echoed off the walls of the TARDIS and he heard the singing of the Time Vortex for an instant as a wave of energy passed through him into sudden silence.
The lights on the control panel froze, changed, grew strange. Looking at them was awfully uncomfortable, they seemed...wrong. Somehow.
The Doctor laughed, delighted. Rose threw him a panicked look.
"That's that then." He held out his hand, and she took it without hesitating a second, even if, truth be told, she looked the slightest bit hysterical."What's the use of absorbing the energies of the Time Vortex if you can't use it to make time for a proper g'bye."
"You...stopped time?"
"Looped it, actually. Sort of. A bit. Just inside the TARDIS." He looked around a little smugly. "Wasn't sure you could do that while it's in motion, but I guess I soaked up enough extra energy to give us a minute. Four or five maybe."
A slow, eerie shudder traveled its way along the TARDIS walls.
"Not too much more than that as it turns out. It's a decaying loop, and it's decaying fast." He looked down at their hands. "As do a lot of things..."
"Doctor..."
"No, yer right of course, I'm goin about it all wrong. I should've started with a poem or something. D'ya like Shakespeare? Wordsworth? Something from the green halls of the Lunar Commonality of the Forty-Third Century? No I know, Byron! Way with words that one."
And the funny thing was, as he started speaking it was the old Doctor-as-usual; mad, grinning like an idiot, cheerful as anything. But as he spoke he stepped closer to her, looking down into her face, and the words got softer and softer, trailing away at the end:
"From the wreck of my past, which hath perish'd
Thus much I at least may recall,
It hath taught me that what I most cherish'd
Deserved to be dearest of all:
In the desert a fountain is springing,
In the wide waste there still is a tree,
And a bird in the solitude singing,
Which speaks to my spirit of thee."
She reached up to touch his face, breathing those strange, human, trying-not-to-cry breaths, and he carefully brushed a strand of hair out of her eyes as he said in a distracted whisper "Way with words that Byron chap. Drank like a fish and was overfond of his sister, but there's none of us is perfe.." and she was kissing him. Or he was kissing her, he couldn't figure out who started it. And didn't care neither.
He pulled back to hold her cheek in his hand, absently wiping away tears with his thumb, thinking to himself what a wondrous sight she'd been, filled with the limitless energies of the Time Vortex. But so much prettier now.
She covered his hand with hers and said "It's all my fault again.."
"Nonsense. Saved the entire human race you did."
She laughed around tears. "I was TRYING to save YOU."
"Ah, well, that's harder. Saving the human race is just a bonus then."
She wrapped her arms around him, putting her head against his chest. "I don't want you to go," she said into his coat. "Can't I come with you?"
"It doesn't work that way love," he said, stroking her hair. "And I'm not really sure where I'm going anyway."
"I don't believe that. You know everything."
"There's plenty things I don't know."
"Fer instance?"
"Fer INstance.." His arms tightened around her. "Why a beautiful, unforgettable, otherwise intelligent human would want to have anything to do with a dried-up old Time Lord."
The words came out muffled by the coat. "Because you're the most wonderful thing's ever happened to me and I'll never forget you the whole rest of my life."
The Doctor closed his eyes and gently kissed the top of her head. "Ah." He rested his cheek against her hair and whispered "Thanks for clearing that up." And after a moment, because he couldn't resist. "NOW I know everything."
They laughed about that until another shudder shook the TARDIS, making them both jump.
"Not yet.." she whispered.
"It's alright." He gently lifted her face, kissed her very softly. "It's not long now. I'll need you to be strong, alright? Can you?"
"Yes." She smiled, tears spilling over again. "But no long speeches, I couldn't bear it."
He grinned. "Fair enough. Give Jackie my best."
"'Kay."
"Tell Mickey-the-idiot no hard feelings right?"
"I will."
"That Captain of yours is bound to show up sooner or later, explain it to him."
"Soon as I've sussed it out myself I will."
"That's my girl. Now you might ought to step back a bit, I'm not sure what.."
The blast knocked him against the wall, and he dimly saw her pick herself up off the floor and run to him. Honestly, he thought, holding up a hand to keep her away. Always throwing herself into danger. I'll have my hands full keeping her out of trouble, whoever I end up being. Lucky bastard..
"No, stay back, love, you don't.."
She stepped forward, her face all defiance (as usual), brushed his hand aside, quickly took his face in her hands and kissed him. REALLY kissed him. He'd thought that first kiss was the sweetest possible, but this one...Regeneration itself held its breath until she was finished.
"My Doctor," she whispered, and then carefully stepped back. His fingers brushed her arm one last time, his hand reaching out to hold the contact as long as possible, and then it was gone.
He took a deep breath. "And, before I go.."
"Don't say that.."
"Rose," the word came out harsh past the tightness in his throat. Damnit, maybe a quick goodbye WOULD have been easier, the pain of Regeneration burning its way through him was NOTHING compared to how much it hurt to leave her.
But he wouldn't have passed it up, that kiss, not for the world. Not for all the worlds.
And it was all worth it, because I saved her. And what d'ya know, she saved me! We saved each other. Nice bit of work that is.
"Before I go I just want to tell you, you were fantastic. Absolutely fantastic. And you know what?"
She shook her head.
"So was I!"
THERE'S the smile. Worth everything.
And it all exploded in a glorious light from all places and all times and all possible realities and from somewhere in it, in the middle of all that sound and fury signifying everything...he heard singing.