For the Love of Halla
Okay, I know this seems totally freaking random, but it just popped into my head, and I thought it would be absolutely hilarious! Anyway, I hope you enjoy Spader's journal-writing, Tybalt's craziness, and Romeo's hopelessness.
This is supposed to be a parody. I don't own Romeo & Juliet, or the Pendragon series, so don't hurt me! :P
First Earth
Alright, I know I'm supposed to send all of my journals to Yenza, but I'd rather write this one for you, Courtney. I haven't been able to get you out of my head since you left me and Gunny on Eelong. Besides, the story I'm about to tell you is the kind of fantastic tum-tigger you'd be interested in!
Anyway, a few months after you left, I was training the gar soccer team when Gunny ran over to me, looking like some kind of madman. "Gunny? What's wrong, mate?"
"It's the flume! It's activating!"
"What?!"
"The flume is coming back to life! It's glowing, and that music's back, pretty as ever!"
"But...that's impossible!"
"If you don't believe me, come see it yourself!" Thank God I did, 'cause if I hadn't, I don't know how long I would've been able to survive there. It was a beautiful sight to see, and it refueled all the hope in me. The tunnel itself was shining so bright that I regretfully had to cover my eyes. I could still hear the music, though, and it was wonderful. The notes flowed together and sounded more glorious than they ever had before. It was over too soon. I heard the music fade, uncovered my eyes to see the repaired tunnel go dark, and was completely silent. I know. Very un-Spader-like, huh? But the shocking spectacle wasn't over, yet, for a lone, familiar figure walked out to meet us. A very cat-like figure, who revealed herself to be none other than Kasha!
"Hello, boys. Did you miss me?" she asked with a catty grin.
"Hobey! I...this is...YOU'RE ALIVE!" I couldn't help myself. I ran over and hugged the the klee like she was my long-lost sister. Well, she sort of was, but still. Poor Gunny was still trying to wrap his head around it. He was just standing there with his mouth hanging open.
"Hey, your face is going to freeze like that if you keep it up!" Kasha joked.
"I just witnessed a miracle of God, and you're makin' gargoyle jokes about me? Jeez, you'd think someone who just came back from the dead would be more understanding." The old doorman grinned, and came to hug her, too. "I sure am glad to see you, though."
Later that night, everyone had a huge feast to celebrate her return. It was kind of like that "Tangled" movie that you told me about, with lanterns lighting most of the night sky, and dancing, and singing. The only way it could've possibly been better is if you were there with me. That brings me to why I was back at the flume, while everyone else was partying. I wanted to see you, Courtney. I had no idea if it would even work, but I had to try. So I yelled "Second Earth!" into the dark tunnel, waiting for the trademark light-show and music. I waited for a good five minutes, but nothing happened. I tried it again, with the same result. Then I tried "Cloral!" Still nothing. Finally, I decided to try calling "First Earth." For the longest time, I thought that wasn't going to work, either, but just when I was starting to lose hope, there was a small light, growing and racing through the tunnel toward me. Relief flooded me when I heard the familiar tune that accompanied it, and felt the tugging sensation that would pull me into your past. What I didn't know was how far into your past I would be pulled.
When the flume finally set me down, I looked around and realized that I wasn't in the subway system of New York. I wasn't even in the country you call America. The clothes that were left at the mouth of the flume reminded me of something I'd seen in the library on Third Earth, when Patrick was showing me how his giant computer thingy worked. He had told it to search for something called Elizabethan England, then a bunch of things showed up. He touched a picture of some old guy called Shakespeare, then on a picture of characters from one of his plays. One of the men, evidently a main character in the story, had a long-sleeved, flowy, white shirt, brown leather trousers, and leather boots. The outfit I found looked exactly the same. "Well, it didn't look so bad on that guy, so I guess I probably won't look ridiculous," I said to no one in particular, and changed quickly. I wasn't exactly wrong, but it still felt weird.
After I got changed, I looked around for any other clues that could tell me where I was. Seeing none, I scanned the cavern for a way out. I didn't have to search for long before I found a set of stairs that ended up leading me up into some sort of crypt. A quick glance at a tombstone told me that this place evidently belonged to a family named the Capulets. That name was familiar, again from Patrick's search. It had been in the summary of that play. Anyway, that place was starting to give me the creeps, so I found my way out in a hurry.
I made my way into town and listened to the people around me, trying to get used to the language, you know the whole "automatic Traveler's translator" thing. Once I could understand them, I tried to get an idea of where I was. I heard something about a massive family feud that was turning all of Verona upside down. Verona. So that was where I'd landed. "Great..." Suddenly, I heard a fight break out just down the street.
"Oh come on, Tybalt. I've never known you to walk away from a fight!" a dark haired boy taunted.
"Ugh, what do you want?" A tall, lighter-haired bloke turned to glare at him.
"Dear King of Cats, nothing but one of your nine lives!" I could see this wasn't going to end well. The shorter of the two wouldn't back down, even when his two friends called him an idiot and tried to hold him back. He drew his blade, and so did the man called Tybalt. You're going to call me crazy for this, but I intervened without even thinking about it. In a matter of seconds, I was standing beside them.
"Oi, what's going on?"
"Oh, I'm just about to make up for Romeo's hopelessness. He won't fight this oaf, so I've stepped up to the challenge!" The dark-haired one smirked at me, then began his attack. I rolled my eyes and knocked the moron out cold.
"Mercutio!"
"Don't worry, your idiot friend is still alive. He has a better chance, now, than he ever did in a natty-do with that bloke." I jerked my thumb over my shoulder at Tybalt.
"How dare you?" Surprised, I turned to face the taller one. He only measured a few inches above me, where he'd towered over the other guy.
"How dare I do what, mate?"
"How dare you break up the fight when I could've just as easily dispatched that fool?!"
"I dared because you would've killed him!"
"I'll just have to settle for you, then, pirate!"
"Pirate?" I asked, half amused, half insulted.
"You are from the colony known as Australia, aren't you?"
"Yeah," I answered, remembering the cover story that Pendragon had given me when I first visited Second Earth. "That doesn't mean I'm a pirate, though. Spader Dorsett, at your service, mate."
"Dorsett...? As in Jess Dorsett, the infamous highwayman?"
"Ah, so you know of my dad." I smirked, as this seemed to shake him up. "He and Mum are still stuck in Australia, but I escaped on a pirate ship. I'm not an actual pirate, though. Just a stow-away."
"Then I surely must rid this town of you, scum!"
"Oi, you have got to be kidding me." With a sigh, I picked up the blade that Mercutio had dropped when I socked him. I didn't have much experience with sword-fighting, but it looked like I'd have to learn real quick. He came at me like lightning, and it was all I could do to avoid his blow. "Alright, now I'm sure Mercutio was insane...!" After dancing out of the way a couple more times, I finally got the feel of my own weapon, and began to fight back. The two other boys watched us intently, amazed that I was still even on my feet. The one called Romeo whistled, momentarily distracting my opponent, and I took the opportunity to disarm him. With one flick of my wrist, his blade was ripped from his hand. He tried to grab it back, but nearly impaled himself on the tip of my rapier. "Sorry, mate, but I can't let you do that. There's no need to shed any blood, so just run along." I must've been using my most convincing Traveler voice, because he nodded and left. I picked up his blade, taking it for a prize, and laid Mercutio's rapier by his side. "Tell this bloke when he wakes up to not go after Tybalt, will you?"
"Of course, Mr. Dorsett," the only boy whose name was unknown to me said.
"Please, just call me Spader."
"Right, Spader. I am Benvolio Montague, and this is my cousin, Romeo. That fool is our dear friend, Mercutio. I believe you've just saved his life!" Romeo came over and gave me a clap on the back, as Mercutio finally came 'round. Poor kid was groggy as nobody's business. Angry, too.
"What the blazes was that for?!" he screamed in my general direction. I rolled my eyes.
"You were askin' for it, ya numpty. You wouldn't have survived that fight, and you know it. I was just trying to keep another young body off the streets!" He still lunged at me, but his mates held him back. "No, let the fool come at me. You lot already know I won't kill him. He needs to be set straight." Reluctantly they let him go, and he started trying to pummel me. I blocked every shot with ease, waiting until he got tired before a threw a punch at his gut that knocked the breath out of him. "You done?" He nodded, wincing in pain. "Good. Now, let's get you home."
"I'll help carry him," Benvolio offered. "I know where he lives."
"Me, too," said Romeo.
"Alright. Hobey-ho, let's go!" I grinned, and the other three laughed as we made our way to Mercutio's place. His family wanted to know exactly what happened, and when Benvolio told them, they all ambushed me with hugs and insisted that I stay with them. Naturally, I couldn't refuse their hospitality, so I'm sitting upstairs in the room they gave me, writing all of this for you, my dearest Courtney. I'll have to stop for now, though, because Mercutio's just called me down to a feast. I hope to see you, soon.
All my love,
Spader