Chapter I: Alliance
Ares hated politics. In fact, there wasn't much that he loathed more. He was a god of action, not of words, treaties, and resolutions. If a victory was complete and absolute there was never any need for a treaty. But for the sake of the remaining Olympic gods, Ares had agreed to attend a summit of pantheons. The Greek, the Norse, the Egyptian, and the Phoenician gods had called a meeting to discuss the danger of the spread of monotheism.
Most of the gods, his own family included, looked at Ares with disgust for his involvement in the Twilight of the Greek gods. It was woefully apparent that they would have all preferred to have Athena as the spokesperson for the Greek gods. Instead, Hermes sat at the head of the Greek delegation. Hermes gave Ares a warning look, so Ares put all four feet of the chair in which he had been leaning on the floor and sat up straight.
Four days! They'd been at this thing for four days and still no resolution had been found. The main issue lay in the fact that the gods still warred between themselves. The Norse gods accused the Greeks of encroaching on their territories north of Macedonia. The Egyptians blamed the Greeks for monopolizing the Mediterranean as did the Phoenicians. The Greeks countered that it was the Northmen's advance into Mediterranean countries that was the problem, not that the Greeks were trying to push northward. The Norse gods were particularly concerned with the Roman advancement into the British isles and Germany. They all expected Ares to do something, anything to stop the power hungry Romans.
"What say you Ares?" Tyr the Norse god of war asked.
Ares hadn't been following the conversation. Instead, his mind had been focused on a sweet vision of a raven-haired beauty taking a bath in Lake Prespa. "Oh, no Tyr, I defer to you and your infinite wisdom. What say you?" Ares figured Tyr was only asking for his opinion so he could turn around and give his own.
"I dare say, sir. I don't think you are taking this meeting very seriously. Perhaps that's because you hope to see the failure of the pantheons. You did, after all, assist that she-wolf, mortal cunt, Xena, in the murder of your sister!" Tyr charged.
Ares jumped from his seat and reached for the hilt of his sword. Tyr bounded up as well and readied his war hammer.
"Stop this madness," Odin bellowed. The icy caverns of Valhalla shook and cracked. "Both of you sit. We are not here to fight."
"I only speak from the heart Odin." Tyr yelled.
"And, I only defend from mine," Ares sheathed his sword and returned to his seat. He heard ripples of laughter reverberating of of the cavernous walls. The gods pitied him for his obsession with Xena.
"Ares will behave," Hermes promised Odin then turned and glared at the Greek god of war. Ares wanted to rip off his little wings.
"As will Tyr," Odin swore.
Tyr growled but picked up his cup of mead and settled back into his own chair.
Frigga, well known for her sober wisdom, raised her hand and waited to be acknowledged. Odin nodded toward her. She stood then spoke, "Perhaps there is a way that we can merge our pantheons and stop all the warring."
"How do you mean?" Odin asked.
"The simplest way, of course, marriage alliances."
A few chuckles filled the chambers but most of the gods listened intently. "I see that some aren't convinced, but mortal kingdoms do it all the time. And it's fairly successful. Take Ares and Tyr, for instance. They hate one another. Both war gods, in competition for followers. What if they were bound by marriage. If Ares' children were Tyr's grandchildren, he may still hate Ares but he'd be beholden by his family ties to treat him with respect."
"Ares has no respect for the other gods. Have you all forgotten what he did to his own family?" Tyr asked.
"No, I assure you that no one has forgotten," Odin answered. Odin also hadn't forgotten that Xena had stolen from him personally to re-seat Ares on Olympus. And, Odin wasn't entirely convinced that Ares' preoccupation with Xena was one-sided. He'd seen the look on her face when she'd fed her former mentor the golden apple, and the tears in her eyes as she watched Ares walk away with his sister. The Xena that Odin had known eons ago hadn't been capable of that kind of feeling but there had obviously been something about Ares that tugged at her heart.
Tyr slammed his mug on the table and belched loudly. "Yet, you all seem perfectly fine having him here at this table as if he should have any say in our futures."
"I'd like to hear more of what Frigga has to say," Hermes turned to the Norse beauty.
"Tyr, I haven't forgotten his crimes against the Olympians. I also recall a particular incident with the god Kal. Ares was present when Xena slayed Kal, was he not?"
Ares rolled his eyes. He'd gotten away with it so far. Looked like Judgement Day was nigh. "Kal got in her way, he got himself killed. He coveted the light chakram as badly as I did. She did you all a favor killing him. He underestimated her. You all do."
"We should kill her and be done with it," Try smiled wickedly. "Let's put it to a vote."
Hands started raising throughout the hall.
"We don't have to resort to murder," Frigga's cool head prevailed as usual. "Xena is not a threat to us, unless we threaten her."
"That's what I've been saying all along, yet none of you can leave well enough alone." Ares shook his head. How had Xena become the subject of debate? She was bathing peacefully in Lake Prespa completely unaware that she was on trial.
"As long as she stays off of Norse soil, I'll leave well enough alone, but if she dares return here." Tyr edged up in his seat.
"You lay a hand on her and I'll. . ." Ares bolted up.
"Ares take a seat," Hermes ordered.
"Fuck you. Fuck all of you. I don't have to sit here while you. . ." Ares tried to defend.
"Yes, you do, that's an order," Hestia rose and dared Ares to subvert her authority. Begrudgingly, Ares sat back down.
"Frigga, please continue." Hestia gracefully bowed.
"What I propose is an alliance between Tyr and Ares. It has to be them, they despise each other. if they can make a marriage alliance work then maybe we can all learn to live together in the face of growing monotheism."
"Do you take me for a cunt? Or him?" Tyr demanded furiously. "We are both men with stiff, erect swords,"
"Calm down, Tyr, I didn't mean for you to marry one another. I swear sometimes you can be so thick." Frigga sighed, hadn't she just discussed the terms earlier? Everything thing she was saying was going over his block of a skull.
"I'll show you thick," Tyr grabbed suggestively at his bulge.
Odin clenched his fists but his temper was slacked by the feel of Frigga's hand landing gently on his wrist.
Ares laughed at Tyr's audacity.
"Peas in a pod," Frigga smiled coldly at Ares. "I suggest that you marry each other's daughters, starting an alliance and hopefully a Norse-Olympian line that can face the challenges presented by this god of Eli."
"Uh-huh, Ares ain't gettin' married." Ares refused. Ares had never had any interest in the idea of wedded bliss. At least not to any of the goddesses he'd ever met. There was only one woman who'd ever stirred those kinds of emotions in him, and she certainly had no interest in marrying him. No, she was perfectly content living the rest of her life with her little bard friend.
"Which one of his daughters? Is she a virgin?" Tyr asked.
"We can work out the details later if we feel like this is a plan we want to move forward with," Frigga could tell she was losing Ares. "Ares, we all have to do things we find distasteful. You would be strengthening your pantheon."
"He doesn't give a shit about his family." Tyr sneered. "He has no honor."
It wasn't entirely true. Ares cared dearly for some of his family members. He looked across the table at Aphrodite. She smiled. She could read his mind. He didn't want to marry anyone but Xena. And they both knew that that was never going to happen. Maybe he should agree to this insane proposal, for the sake of the other Greek gods. He did owe them, after all.
"Are his daughters as ugly as him?" Ares pointed at the undeniably gorgeous god with crystal blue eyes and curly blonde hair.
"He has only one, Gunnr."
Gunnr stood on the other side of the room. She was breathtaking. Her long-blonde locks fell over her breastplate and reached her navel. The blue beauty of her eyes was second only to Xena. Ares didn't love the girl, might never learn to love her, but when had marriage ever been about love?
Tyr saw Ares' approving stare. He hated the Greek with every fiber of his being, but a marriage alliance with Ares would mean that his grandsons would be strong, proud warriors. It was a smart match. Together, he and Ares could amass a following that would shut down this pathetic god of love nonsense that continued to spread like wildfire. Together, they could bring Heaven down.
"Ares, if you are willing, I will accept this proposal. And, to show my good faith I will swear that as long as the alliance holds, I will cause no harm to your Warrior Princess."
"Xena would clean the floor with you, you pompous airbag. I will agree to the alliance, on one condition."
Odin knew Ares, he knew what was coming. He wondered if it would be worth the risk. Then Odin remember seeing the Elijan sign of the fish, three times in the last week on Germanic lands. They had to do something, even if it meant consorting with Ares.
"What's your condition, Ares?" Odin asked.
"Recognize me as King of the Greek gods, of course." Ares smiled sinisterly.
Gasps and whispers spread throughout the room until Odin pounded his hammer. "Put it to a vote!"
Most of the Greeks voted nay but they were far outnumbered by the other pantheons who sought an alliance at any cost.
When it was all said and done. Ares was proclaimed King of the Greek Gods, and Gunnr his Queen. You couldn't win them all, Ares frowned as he looked at his new goddess.