Thank you all for being patient for the rewrite of this fan fiction. Here is the new first chapter and I hope it's a bit better and that you still love it.

Disclaimer: I do not own this anime, nor the characters in it. I do own Stephanie though.

Sometimes it was just easier to hit my pillow and cry until I could forget his face. Other times, it was easier to just hate him altogether. But could I really hate him? I was the one that left after graduation, said goodbye to everyone, and hopped the nearest plane away from them. Of course, they're still my friends and I love them all. I remember them the most when I walk to my classes…alone. I only ever think about him during the holidays and festivals held at school. I never attend them but the thought of them makes me happy inside.

Life really isn't fun anymore.

I hadn't been to class in three days though, thanks to some letters I received. They were from the old club members, minus their infamous leader. They were all doing so well since I left them. I was surprised they even thought enough about me to write. Even so, they set me back so far that even my roommate, Stephanie, couldn't set me off by annoyance. She was a short girl, well built with a great tan. Her eyes were brown and plain but her hair was a creamy blonde with her tips dyed black. Altogether, she was a very attractive person but I think people found it hard to get past her personality enough to appreciate her features.

I had moved to the states on a small scholarship and was packed into a nice, small dorm with her. We never really talked to each other much, so we kept to ourselves. It wasn't anything like the Host Club. I was so sure I'd make new friends but sadly, I was stuck with Stephanie.

The solitude was okay I guess.

So now, four years later, I was laying on my bed, thinking about them. I still can't believe how much they all had succeeded. Honey never went back to training or fighting. Instead, he and Mori opened up a small bakery in Tokyo. They seemed to be doing well, as proof in the photo they sent me. Both were standing in front of the shop, waving, and covered in powdered sugar. I couldn't help but laugh. Hikaru and Kaoru had surprisingly split to pursue their own goals, with Hikaru working at a store that sold every type of music, and Kaoru owning a small pet shop in Kyoto. They sometimes went to visit Honey-sempai and Mori. Kyoya even wrote me, in the finest penmanship I had ever seen, telling me of his business. Belonging to the Host Club for so long rubbed off on him, because he opened one in Osaka about a year ago, and business was going good.

They all seemed to be having so much fun but not once, did any of them mention Tamaki-sempai. He was just too big for their letters, I guess.

Sighing for the hundredth time that night, I rolled over to look around my room. I had done nothing but stayed cooped up inside my room. How could anyone live this way? If Tamaki had moved on and forgotten about me, then I could move on too. So, I stood, ready to hit a night out, but was stopped abruptly as the door swung open, admitting Stephanie in an angry rage.

Slamming the door behind her, she huffed like a wild animal and stomped to her closet. Opening the door, our eyes met in a fierce gaze in the mirror. She spun on me like a predator to their prey and loomed above me. "Haruhi, we're going out." Just my luck, here I was without a plan but asked to join the person I least wanted to see. Before I could even get a word out though, Stephanie stopped a hand over my mouth. "There is a catch though." I hate those words.

Before I knew it, I was stuck downtown with Stephanie hanging on my arm, giggling and laughing with her friends, and me, looking like her gay lover. Why did I always think things would get better, when they only got worse? I thought I was out of that stage of being something I wasn't. At least now thought, I didn't look like a boy. I actually grew into my female figure and girlish good looks…or so I'd like to think. My hair grew from the short cut it had been for four years in high school and finally reached halfway down my back. Thankfully, I had gotten rid of the bangs and layered the rest. I quite liked the hairstyle the stylist had given me. She said I really needed a whole new look. She even dressed me up like a doll.

I kept the hair, not the clothes. I liked my own baggy pants and tank tops I was well used to when I was younger. It was just a pity that with my figure coming along nicely, I could no longer play the boy I was for four years. So, sitting here now, with Stephanie hugging tightly to me, showing me off as if I was hers, I felt used, back in the Host Club as just another date for cash. She was paying me forty dollars after this.

I was glad to be getting it anyway because after tonight, I would saving up to take a trip. I wanted to go home and see the gang again, show off my finely attuned American accent and show them how well I was doing. So for now, I would continue to go on "dates" with Stephanie for money.

We never really spoke much about our outings when we came back to the dorm and I was sort of glad. I didn't want to speak to her, I felt too numb. Here I was, back in the business I wanted nothing more than to be away from. At least it wasn't forever.

Or so I thought.

"How long have you two been together?" A chatty, very annoying girl that Stephanie called Crystal, was asking us questions all night about the two of us and I just left it to my "better half". She answered a couple years but it had actually only been a couple months. Yup, I was still here, collecting money and dating a girl who constantly breathed down my neck with all her smothering. I had no chance to find anyone else. At least she kept my mind off of him though.

"What about you, Haruhi? What high school did you attend?"

This caught my attention and I smiled. "Ouran High School." I said proudly. I was given a weird look by one of Stephanie's friends.

"I heard about that school from my sister. She's in Japan on a student exchange program." The girl stated. "She says that Ouran used to have a Host Club. Was the school really that dirty?"

I couldn't believe my ears. She really thought that about my club. "Well actually," I began, scooting closer to my date. If I sat close to her, than I wouldn't feel the need to jump across the table to kill her friend. "It was actually a pretty nice thing at our school. A group of boys set up a club to help entertain girls." I saw her face distort and become ugly. I sighed. "Not like that. They…made the girls smile and talked to them." I smiled. "Shared time and coffee." I couldn't help but chuckle lightly, a small joke only to me and the Host Club. "It was so beautiful, the room they held it in…" By now, I had this long away look in my eyes and I knew the girls were staring, but I was reliving my old days, damn it. I deserved this smile. "Even outside the club, they tried their very best to make everyone happy."

Stephanie had to jerk me back to the real world though. Jerk.

"Babe, you make it sound like you were part of the Host Club." She laughed obnoxiously.

I just rolled my eyes, played it off as a silly thought from a silly girl and smiled. "Girls weren't allowed." I simply replied.

Back at the dorm room, I was gladly accepting the silence we had between us as we got ready for bed. I loved not talking to her, especially now, but she couldn't help it and broke it. "You know, you're very weird."

I couldn't help but snort. "Weird?" What could I say to that? I sighed and climbed into bed, rolling on my side to face the wall. "Ju-" I would have told her to just go to sleep but I felt something cold at my back and turned to see her lying next to me. I never thought I'd hit the wall that fast but with a girl in my bed, I kind of thought I should have gone faster. "What are you doing? Go to your own bed."

But she looked up at me with my eyes that looked so sad and she stayed put. "I'm sorry. Can I just stay here for tonight?" She gave no explanation, no tears. She simply asked and rolled over and went to sleep. I couldn't help but feel sorry for her so I shrugged it off and laid back down next to her. At one point in the night, I woke up with her head on my chest and her arms around my waist. It was only for one night so I went back to sleep.

Boy, how wrong I was.

Another month had passed of her paying me for dates, showing me off, and sleeping in my bed every night. Now, I wasn't gay but the attention felt great. Just near the end of the month, I realized how much she had really grown attached to me and how much I felt nothing for her. Was that really fair?

"Babe," She called to me as I was getting, ice-cream from the vending machine. She came flying at me, hugged me so hard I thought I was going to pop, gave me a quick kiss on my cheek, and hung on my arm. "I have a surprise for you." She was so happy. I'd like to thank my experience from the Host Club helped.

"Really? What is it?" It couldn't hurt to ask, could it? She had led us both up the stairs, digging around in her pocket for something. When we stopped at the top, she handed me another wad of cash to pay back the I.O.U. slips she'd given me. I had stopped to look at it and felt that familiar ping of selfishness come striking back. I, reluctantly, took it and counted in my head. I actually had enough to sustain a healthy good three months in Japan but once I left, where would that leave Stephanie? She could barely spend one day away from me as it was.

Looking at her like it was the first time; I couldn't help but smile. "Come with me." She was a good friend and I didn't want to leave her alone. Who knew, maybe she'd find someone in Japan to hang all over…hopefully. Taking her hand in mine, I laced our fingers together and sighed. "I want you to meet my friends."

She looked like a little kid at Christmas with her face alight and her eyes wide, before she crashed against me in a bear hug. We spent the next few weeks scheduling with our teachers about taking some time off. The night before our trip, we packed and headed to bed early, Stephanie still locked around me. The great thing was, was that I never told the gang that I was coming so that I could surprise them. Hopefully, they wouldn't be angry.

Thank you for reading and staying with me this far. Hope you liked the rewritten chapter. The rest will be coming soon! Comment please!

Your Beloved Host