All Hail the Randomness
Okay so I don't own any of the characters. I'll get over it eventually.
(Behind Kurama's house)
Kurama- (holds a rose and plucks the petals off) Loves me, loves me not, loves me, loves me not.......
Janel- Who loves you Kurama?
Kurama- YOU! No I mean HIEI! I don't know I'm confused.
Julia- HELLO FELLOW DEMONS!!!!!!
Janel- HELLO!
Hiei- HI!!
Kurama- I LOVE HIEI!!!! No! I mean, I LOVE JANEL!!!! No..... I'm still confused.........
Julia- I'm always confused! Except when I'm stoned, I seem to see more clearly like I'm in a real place! 'Cause God knows none of you are real. Wait if you're not real then why am I talking to you?.............I'M SKITZO!!!!!!!
Janel- I knew it! I knew I wasn't real!
Hiei- Wait a tic! If I'm not real then Kurama can't love me! Yippee!!!!! I'm freeeeeeeeeeeee! I want to share my freedom! (Pulls off his arm bandage) Be free dragon! BE FREEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!
Kurama- But if Julia's the only one that's real then I'm not real either! I can still love you!!!!
Hiei- NOOOOO!!! Come back dragon come back!!!!!!!!!!
Kurama- Now I'm confused again. Me you and Janel aren't real. That mean's I still have to choose who I love..............
Julia- I know how to find out if you're real or not!!! (Kisses Hiei) Yup you're real! (Kisses Kurama) You're real!
(Looks at Janel. Janel runs away)
Julia- Come back I've got to kiss you!!!!!!!!!!!
Janel- NO! I'd rather be imaginary then be kissed by you!!!
Kurama- Now I think I love Julia... I'm even more confused...........
Julia- Everyone stop thinking about Janel. Then maybe she'll disappear 'cause she's not real!!
(Everyone starts imagining)
Hiei- Must stop thinking about Janel!!! Must stop thinking about Janel!!!!! Janel make me stop thinking about you!
Kurama- JANEL I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!! No wait...... I LOVE HIEI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Julia- Janel is not there she is just a figment of my imagination. Janel is not real. Must stop thinking about Janel.......
Julia- It's not working she's still there!!!!!!!!!!
Janel- Maybe that means I am real!!!!
Julia- There's one way to find out!!...................KURAMA GO KISS JANEL!!!!
Kurama- But I love Hiei!
Hiei- No you don't
Kurama- No I don't. JANEL COME BACK AND LET ME KISS YOU I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!
Janel- At least it's better than Julia. Okay Kurama you can kiss me. (Janel turns to find Kurama kissing a tree)
Janel- Kurama I'm over here...........
Kurama- Oh you're Janel. All this time I thought they were talking about this tree... I have finally made up my mind... I LOVE YOU JANEL TREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Kurama resumes kissing the tree)
Hiei- They make such a good couple!!!!! (Starts to tear)
Julia- It's just so beautiful!!!!!! (Starts to tear as well)
Janel- I never knew I had a tree self... I'M NOT AN ONLY CHILD!!!!! (Starts to tear)
Julia- (stops tearing) Dude Janel, you have a brother!
Janel- I HAVE A BROTHER!!!! (Cries harder)
Hiei- I WISH I HAD A SIBLING!!!!!!!!!!! (Cries harder as well)
Yukina- LOOK IT"S MY BROTHER!!!!!!!!!!
Hiei- Hn?
Yukina- (runs forward) BROTHER BROTHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hiei- YUKINA SISTER!!!!!!!! (Yukina runs past Hiei and hugs the tree)
Yukina- Tree brother! I'm so glad I finally found you!!!
Kurama- (Stops kissing the tree) Janel tree you never told me you were a boy!!!!..........GASP!!!! You're a maple tree! And all this time I thought you were an elm!!!!!! (Starts to tear)
Janel- (stops crying) GASP!! You are a maple! How could you do this to us Janel tree!?
Kurama- (hugs Janel) I'm so sorry imaginary Janel!!! I have been deceived it is you that I love!!!!!!!!!
Janel- I LOVE YOU KURAMA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Julia- Janel! Is this true?
Janel- I don't know. But it does fit the story!
Julia- You're right! HIEI I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!
Hiei- (stops crying) Really?
Julia- NO!
Kurama- Janel marry me!
Janel- Okay!
Kurama- (points to a man walking down the street) YOU RANDOM PERSON MARRY US!!!!!!
RandomMan- Okay!!!! I now pronounce you husband and wife! You may kiss the bride!
Kurama- YEY!!!! (Leans over and kisses Janel)
(10 minutes later)
Janel- Whoa!!! Where should we go for our honeymoon?
Kurama- Let's climb the Janel Tree!
Janel- Okay! (They run off and climb the tree)
Hiei- Are you sure you don't love me?
Julia- Yes.
(Yusuke walks up)
Yusuke- Hey guys! Why are Janel and Kurama doing things in a tree that shouldn't be spoken out loud and Yukina hugging that same tree?
Julia- Janel and Kurama are on a honeymoon in Yukina's brother.
Hiei- The tree is Yukina's brother.
Yusuke- Okay. You guys want to go get a drink?
Julia- Yes Sake would be good right now.
Yusuke- Not Sake I was thinking more along the lines of a soda or something!
Julia+Hiei- How dare you take the name of the sacred sake in vain! (They start to strangle Yusuke when...)
Janel- (climbs down from the tree) I WANT A DIVORCE!!!!!!!!
Kurama- (Follows) ME TOO!!!!!
Janel- Wait that random person is gone! Now we're stuck married!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Janel darts back up the tree but falls out of the tree and dies)
SpiritJanel- NOW I'M DEAD!!! THIS IS YOUR FAULT FOX!!!!!!!!!!!
Kurama- IS NOT!
Julia- Wake me up when there's sake! (She falls asleep against Hiei's shoulder)
Hiei- Let's go get sake and be idiots!
Julia- I'm up!
Kurama- Yukina are you going to come? (Yukina's in a house that she built around the tree)
Yukina- No I'm going to stay with my brother!
(Inside Kurama's house)
Yusuke- Let's play truth or dare!
SpiritJanel- How come we always seem to end up playing truth or dare?
Yusuke- I dunno. Kurama you go first.
Kurama- Okay. Janel, truth or dare?
Janel- Dare
Kurama- (suppresses a smile) Okay I dare you to make out with Kurama!
SpiritJanel- What kind of lame ass dare is that?!
Julia- Really Kurama did you really think that would work?
Kurama- (pouts) Yes.......
Hiei- Fine I'll take over Janel's dare. I dare you to go into a woman's club and get up and sing "Whole Lotta Rosie" by AC/DC!
SpiritJanel- Fine. (They all venture to the club Kurama Yusuke and Hiei have to pretend to be girls to get in. Once inside Janel sings)
SpiritJanel- Never had a woman, never had a woman like you! Doing' all the things doing' all the things you do!
(Afterwards)
Hiei- Your turn Janel.
SpiritJanel- Juj truth or dare?
Julia- Dare
Janel- I dare you to get drunk!
Julia- Wha? That be impossible!
SpiritJanel- I AM A SPIRIT YOU SHALL OBEY MY EVERY COMAND!!!!!!!!
Julia- (Eyes Hiei and laughs like an idiot) Heeeeeeey!
Hiei- Julia? Bo?
Julia- (falls across Hiei's lap) You're pretty.................
Hiei- Yes I am!
Yusuke- I can't believe it Janel you actually made her drunk!
Janel- No applause just the money. Julia you can stop now
(Julia snaps out of her drunkenness)
Julia- (still laying across Hiei) UNHAND ME PERV!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hiei- WHAT THIS WAS YOU'RE FAULT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SpiritJanel- Julia it's your turn.
Julia- Yusuke, truth or dare?
Yusuke- truth
Julia- Wrong! I dare you to go up on that stage take you're wig and dress off and say "I am Man hear me roar" then jump off the stage and run out of the club roaring!
Yusuke- What happened to truth?
Julia- Truth? There is no truth! We play by my rules now!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yusuke- (sweatdrop) Here's goes nothing. (Goes up on stage and takes off his wig and dress revealing black YYH boxer shorts-What he's a walking billboard? then...)
Yusuke- I AM MAN HEAR ME ROAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Yusuke runs out of the club making roaring noises the others soon follow they all start walking down the street towards Kurama's house)
Hiei- Yusuke could you please put your pants back on?
Yusuke- I left them at Kurama's house.
Kurama- Shoot I just remembered I locked the house up and left the keys on the counter.
Yusuke- MY PANTS!!!!!! MY LOVERLY GREEN PANTS!!!!!!!
SpiritJanel- Which you have like a million more pairs of! Let's go to my house.
Yusuke- What about my pants?
SpiritJanel- I've got some guy pants you can wear. Plus we like to watch you suffer.
(At Janel's)
Julia- It's your dare Yusuke (who has pants now Kurama and Hiei are also dressed like guys as well)
Yusuke- I dare Kurama to go put on Janel's halter top and a skirt then go next door sing the "I feel pretty" song and ask if they think you're pretty.
(Kurama goes upstairs then returns in Janel's clothes and goes next door. The gang gathers around the windows and they watch as Kurama goes up to the door and sings. In the end he strikes a pose and pops the question. The neighbor hits Kurama in the head with a beer bottle then slams the door in his face)
Neighbor- Stupid kids always playin' truth or dare. I should get a restraining order!
(Back at Janel's)
Kurama- Where are my clothes?
Others- We dunno. (Kurama sits down and pouts)
Kurama- I hate you guys!
SpiritJanel- Well Kurama it's your dare and we have one victim I mean friend to dare.
Kurama- Okay I dare Hiei to go for a snowmobile ride with Janel!
SpiritJanel- DEATH BY THE 700!!!!!!!!! QUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hiei- But it's not winter!
Kurama- It is in the Makai!
Hiei- Blast. (They all go to the Makai and watch as Janel goes into to suicidal mode and Hiei is hanging on for dear life.)
Kurama- It really is a wondrous site to behold.
Yusuke- Yup.
Julia- I have a confession! I THINK YUSUKE'S SMOK'IN!
Yusuke- IN THE BOY'S ROOM!
Kurama- Dude I think that means she loves you.
Yusuke- Really?
Julia- Yes. (Insert sappy romantic music as they run into each others arms and start kissing then run off hand in hand)
Kurama- Just don't get married you'll regret it! (Janel pulls the snowmobile to a stop. Hiei falls off the back in a state between life and death.)
Kurama- Let's go home wife.
SpiritJanel- I'm not you're wife.
Kurama- Until we find that random person you're my wife.
SpiritJanel- Nope. AliveJanel was you're wife I'm dead now! I'm FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! QUAHA!
(Janel revs up the Snowmobile and flies off. Kurama stares at Hiei as the demon starts to come to. Hiei returns he foxes glare then Kurama extends a hand to help Hiei stand. Sappy romantic music stars to play again.)
Hiei- Don't even think about it fox. (Stalks off)
Kurama- NOOOOOOO!!!!! HIEI I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!! (Count D walks up)
D- You look saddened. May I interest you in a pet?
Kurama- What kind of pet?
(D opens a box inside there's a little chibi Hiei and a chibi Janel)
Kurama- IT"S HIEI AND JANEL!!!!!!!!
D- They're hamsters. Not the greatest though for some reason they're really little not human sized like they should be.
Kurama- I'll take 'em!
D- Okay. Just sign here and obey the rules. If you don't the shop is not responsible for any side effects.
Kurama- All right it's all done. THANK YOU D!!!!!!!!!!!! (Kurama walks away with the box.)
END
Okay so I don't own any of the characters. I'll get over it eventually.
(Behind Kurama's house)
Kurama- (holds a rose and plucks the petals off) Loves me, loves me not, loves me, loves me not.......
Janel- Who loves you Kurama?
Kurama- YOU! No I mean HIEI! I don't know I'm confused.
Julia- HELLO FELLOW DEMONS!!!!!!
Janel- HELLO!
Hiei- HI!!
Kurama- I LOVE HIEI!!!! No! I mean, I LOVE JANEL!!!! No..... I'm still confused.........
Julia- I'm always confused! Except when I'm stoned, I seem to see more clearly like I'm in a real place! 'Cause God knows none of you are real. Wait if you're not real then why am I talking to you?.............I'M SKITZO!!!!!!!
Janel- I knew it! I knew I wasn't real!
Hiei- Wait a tic! If I'm not real then Kurama can't love me! Yippee!!!!! I'm freeeeeeeeeeeee! I want to share my freedom! (Pulls off his arm bandage) Be free dragon! BE FREEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!
Kurama- But if Julia's the only one that's real then I'm not real either! I can still love you!!!!
Hiei- NOOOOO!!! Come back dragon come back!!!!!!!!!!
Kurama- Now I'm confused again. Me you and Janel aren't real. That mean's I still have to choose who I love..............
Julia- I know how to find out if you're real or not!!! (Kisses Hiei) Yup you're real! (Kisses Kurama) You're real!
(Looks at Janel. Janel runs away)
Julia- Come back I've got to kiss you!!!!!!!!!!!
Janel- NO! I'd rather be imaginary then be kissed by you!!!
Kurama- Now I think I love Julia... I'm even more confused...........
Julia- Everyone stop thinking about Janel. Then maybe she'll disappear 'cause she's not real!!
(Everyone starts imagining)
Hiei- Must stop thinking about Janel!!! Must stop thinking about Janel!!!!! Janel make me stop thinking about you!
Kurama- JANEL I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!! No wait...... I LOVE HIEI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Julia- Janel is not there she is just a figment of my imagination. Janel is not real. Must stop thinking about Janel.......
Julia- It's not working she's still there!!!!!!!!!!
Janel- Maybe that means I am real!!!!
Julia- There's one way to find out!!...................KURAMA GO KISS JANEL!!!!
Kurama- But I love Hiei!
Hiei- No you don't
Kurama- No I don't. JANEL COME BACK AND LET ME KISS YOU I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!
Janel- At least it's better than Julia. Okay Kurama you can kiss me. (Janel turns to find Kurama kissing a tree)
Janel- Kurama I'm over here...........
Kurama- Oh you're Janel. All this time I thought they were talking about this tree... I have finally made up my mind... I LOVE YOU JANEL TREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Kurama resumes kissing the tree)
Hiei- They make such a good couple!!!!! (Starts to tear)
Julia- It's just so beautiful!!!!!! (Starts to tear as well)
Janel- I never knew I had a tree self... I'M NOT AN ONLY CHILD!!!!! (Starts to tear)
Julia- (stops tearing) Dude Janel, you have a brother!
Janel- I HAVE A BROTHER!!!! (Cries harder)
Hiei- I WISH I HAD A SIBLING!!!!!!!!!!! (Cries harder as well)
Yukina- LOOK IT"S MY BROTHER!!!!!!!!!!
Hiei- Hn?
Yukina- (runs forward) BROTHER BROTHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hiei- YUKINA SISTER!!!!!!!! (Yukina runs past Hiei and hugs the tree)
Yukina- Tree brother! I'm so glad I finally found you!!!
Kurama- (Stops kissing the tree) Janel tree you never told me you were a boy!!!!..........GASP!!!! You're a maple tree! And all this time I thought you were an elm!!!!!! (Starts to tear)
Janel- (stops crying) GASP!! You are a maple! How could you do this to us Janel tree!?
Kurama- (hugs Janel) I'm so sorry imaginary Janel!!! I have been deceived it is you that I love!!!!!!!!!
Janel- I LOVE YOU KURAMA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Julia- Janel! Is this true?
Janel- I don't know. But it does fit the story!
Julia- You're right! HIEI I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!
Hiei- (stops crying) Really?
Julia- NO!
Kurama- Janel marry me!
Janel- Okay!
Kurama- (points to a man walking down the street) YOU RANDOM PERSON MARRY US!!!!!!
RandomMan- Okay!!!! I now pronounce you husband and wife! You may kiss the bride!
Kurama- YEY!!!! (Leans over and kisses Janel)
(10 minutes later)
Janel- Whoa!!! Where should we go for our honeymoon?
Kurama- Let's climb the Janel Tree!
Janel- Okay! (They run off and climb the tree)
Hiei- Are you sure you don't love me?
Julia- Yes.
(Yusuke walks up)
Yusuke- Hey guys! Why are Janel and Kurama doing things in a tree that shouldn't be spoken out loud and Yukina hugging that same tree?
Julia- Janel and Kurama are on a honeymoon in Yukina's brother.
Hiei- The tree is Yukina's brother.
Yusuke- Okay. You guys want to go get a drink?
Julia- Yes Sake would be good right now.
Yusuke- Not Sake I was thinking more along the lines of a soda or something!
Julia+Hiei- How dare you take the name of the sacred sake in vain! (They start to strangle Yusuke when...)
Janel- (climbs down from the tree) I WANT A DIVORCE!!!!!!!!
Kurama- (Follows) ME TOO!!!!!
Janel- Wait that random person is gone! Now we're stuck married!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Janel darts back up the tree but falls out of the tree and dies)
SpiritJanel- NOW I'M DEAD!!! THIS IS YOUR FAULT FOX!!!!!!!!!!!
Kurama- IS NOT!
Julia- Wake me up when there's sake! (She falls asleep against Hiei's shoulder)
Hiei- Let's go get sake and be idiots!
Julia- I'm up!
Kurama- Yukina are you going to come? (Yukina's in a house that she built around the tree)
Yukina- No I'm going to stay with my brother!
(Inside Kurama's house)
Yusuke- Let's play truth or dare!
SpiritJanel- How come we always seem to end up playing truth or dare?
Yusuke- I dunno. Kurama you go first.
Kurama- Okay. Janel, truth or dare?
Janel- Dare
Kurama- (suppresses a smile) Okay I dare you to make out with Kurama!
SpiritJanel- What kind of lame ass dare is that?!
Julia- Really Kurama did you really think that would work?
Kurama- (pouts) Yes.......
Hiei- Fine I'll take over Janel's dare. I dare you to go into a woman's club and get up and sing "Whole Lotta Rosie" by AC/DC!
SpiritJanel- Fine. (They all venture to the club Kurama Yusuke and Hiei have to pretend to be girls to get in. Once inside Janel sings)
SpiritJanel- Never had a woman, never had a woman like you! Doing' all the things doing' all the things you do!
(Afterwards)
Hiei- Your turn Janel.
SpiritJanel- Juj truth or dare?
Julia- Dare
Janel- I dare you to get drunk!
Julia- Wha? That be impossible!
SpiritJanel- I AM A SPIRIT YOU SHALL OBEY MY EVERY COMAND!!!!!!!!
Julia- (Eyes Hiei and laughs like an idiot) Heeeeeeey!
Hiei- Julia? Bo?
Julia- (falls across Hiei's lap) You're pretty.................
Hiei- Yes I am!
Yusuke- I can't believe it Janel you actually made her drunk!
Janel- No applause just the money. Julia you can stop now
(Julia snaps out of her drunkenness)
Julia- (still laying across Hiei) UNHAND ME PERV!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hiei- WHAT THIS WAS YOU'RE FAULT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SpiritJanel- Julia it's your turn.
Julia- Yusuke, truth or dare?
Yusuke- truth
Julia- Wrong! I dare you to go up on that stage take you're wig and dress off and say "I am Man hear me roar" then jump off the stage and run out of the club roaring!
Yusuke- What happened to truth?
Julia- Truth? There is no truth! We play by my rules now!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yusuke- (sweatdrop) Here's goes nothing. (Goes up on stage and takes off his wig and dress revealing black YYH boxer shorts-What he's a walking billboard? then...)
Yusuke- I AM MAN HEAR ME ROAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Yusuke runs out of the club making roaring noises the others soon follow they all start walking down the street towards Kurama's house)
Hiei- Yusuke could you please put your pants back on?
Yusuke- I left them at Kurama's house.
Kurama- Shoot I just remembered I locked the house up and left the keys on the counter.
Yusuke- MY PANTS!!!!!! MY LOVERLY GREEN PANTS!!!!!!!
SpiritJanel- Which you have like a million more pairs of! Let's go to my house.
Yusuke- What about my pants?
SpiritJanel- I've got some guy pants you can wear. Plus we like to watch you suffer.
(At Janel's)
Julia- It's your dare Yusuke (who has pants now Kurama and Hiei are also dressed like guys as well)
Yusuke- I dare Kurama to go put on Janel's halter top and a skirt then go next door sing the "I feel pretty" song and ask if they think you're pretty.
(Kurama goes upstairs then returns in Janel's clothes and goes next door. The gang gathers around the windows and they watch as Kurama goes up to the door and sings. In the end he strikes a pose and pops the question. The neighbor hits Kurama in the head with a beer bottle then slams the door in his face)
Neighbor- Stupid kids always playin' truth or dare. I should get a restraining order!
(Back at Janel's)
Kurama- Where are my clothes?
Others- We dunno. (Kurama sits down and pouts)
Kurama- I hate you guys!
SpiritJanel- Well Kurama it's your dare and we have one victim I mean friend to dare.
Kurama- Okay I dare Hiei to go for a snowmobile ride with Janel!
SpiritJanel- DEATH BY THE 700!!!!!!!!! QUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hiei- But it's not winter!
Kurama- It is in the Makai!
Hiei- Blast. (They all go to the Makai and watch as Janel goes into to suicidal mode and Hiei is hanging on for dear life.)
Kurama- It really is a wondrous site to behold.
Yusuke- Yup.
Julia- I have a confession! I THINK YUSUKE'S SMOK'IN!
Yusuke- IN THE BOY'S ROOM!
Kurama- Dude I think that means she loves you.
Yusuke- Really?
Julia- Yes. (Insert sappy romantic music as they run into each others arms and start kissing then run off hand in hand)
Kurama- Just don't get married you'll regret it! (Janel pulls the snowmobile to a stop. Hiei falls off the back in a state between life and death.)
Kurama- Let's go home wife.
SpiritJanel- I'm not you're wife.
Kurama- Until we find that random person you're my wife.
SpiritJanel- Nope. AliveJanel was you're wife I'm dead now! I'm FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! QUAHA!
(Janel revs up the Snowmobile and flies off. Kurama stares at Hiei as the demon starts to come to. Hiei returns he foxes glare then Kurama extends a hand to help Hiei stand. Sappy romantic music stars to play again.)
Hiei- Don't even think about it fox. (Stalks off)
Kurama- NOOOOOOO!!!!! HIEI I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!! (Count D walks up)
D- You look saddened. May I interest you in a pet?
Kurama- What kind of pet?
(D opens a box inside there's a little chibi Hiei and a chibi Janel)
Kurama- IT"S HIEI AND JANEL!!!!!!!!
D- They're hamsters. Not the greatest though for some reason they're really little not human sized like they should be.
Kurama- I'll take 'em!
D- Okay. Just sign here and obey the rules. If you don't the shop is not responsible for any side effects.
Kurama- All right it's all done. THANK YOU D!!!!!!!!!!!! (Kurama walks away with the box.)
END