If Harry had a french, curly moustache...
If Ron had a long, ginger beard...
If Draco had side burns...
If Fred and George had ear hair...
If Percy had nose hair...
If Charlie had hairy hands...
If Bill had back hair...
If Goyle had a goatee...
If Crabbe had big bristly moustache...
If Voldemort had hair...
If Dumbledore DIDN'T have any hair at all...
If Arthur had a bald patch...
If Remus was a hairless werewolf...
If Sirius was bald...
If James Senior had a quiff...
If Peter Pettigrew had a Hitler moustache...
If Neville had a hairy face...
They would all look like gorillas'.