Author: Lindsey

Rating: R

Disclaimer: I do not ownany of the characters in this storyor any of the lyrics of "I Can Love You Better" by the Dixie Chicks.

Summary: Lillian tries to convince her secret love that he should be with her instead.

Characters: Lillian, Adam, Trish, and appearances by Matt, Jay, Amy, and Chris

Title: Hope and Heartache

§

"Is something wrong?" Amy asked, startling Lillian.

They were in the locker room after the show, getting ready to leave.

"You seem kind of quiet. That's very unusual."

Lillian giggled. Amy was right. She had something on her mind, but there was no way it was going to leave there. She couldn't tell anyone.

"Yea. I just think I caught something." She forced a smile.

"Oh, well, I hope you didn't! That can't help your voice!" Amy said. "You better be back to normal tonight at the club."

"Oh yea…" Lillian said.

"You didn't forget, did you? I've been talking about this all day!"

"No, I didn't forget." Lillian lied.

"Ok. Good. Come on, get dressed. I'm sure you didn't catch anything."

"Yea." Lillian said and Amy left.

Lillian looked around the locker room. Her eyes set on her and she really didn't like what she saw. Her blonde hair fell on her shoulders, her large breasts slightly poking out of the top of her bra, the perfect smile on her face. It made Lillian sick.

"No wonder he doesn't like me. She's perfect!" She mumbled to herself.

Minutes later, she heard her laughing. She looked over at her and saw she was talking on her cell phone.

"It's ok. I'll meet you there. I think Amy and Lillian are going, too. I'll just ride with them." Trish said. "Go have fun with the guys before we get there."

Lillian rolled her eyes. 'Great! I have to share a car with her now?' She thought to herself and grunted.

"I'll ask her now. She's right here."

Lillian made a face and fake smiled as Trish walked over to her from across the room.

"Hi!" Trish said, happy and chipper. "Can I ride with you and Amy to the club tonight? Adam wants to ride with Matt and Jay."

"Oh, I wasn't aware that you were going." Lillian said, mocking Trish's chipper tone.

"Oh, yea! Amy invited me. She said it would be fun for all three of us girls to get together. I thought it was a great idea. Don't you?" Trish asked.

"Oh, it's a wonderful idea!" Trish smiled brightly. "Girls night out!"

They both laughed happily, only Lillian wasn't happy. She was more jealous of Trish than any other girl in her life. Trish was everything she wasn't.

Trish thanked her and left the room. Lillian slumped down in the bench as soon as the door closed. She couldn't believe that just happened. She didn't want a 'girls night out' with Trish, but she'd have to deal with it now.

"I plan on getting really drunk tonight!" She said in the empty room and chuckled. She went back to getting dressed.

When she left the locker room, Amy was waiting for her with Adam, Jay, and Matt. She looked around, but didn't see Trish anywhere and she smiled, walking over to the small circle of her friends.

"Hey guys!"

"Hey! You're alive! I thought you'd never come out of there!" Adam joked and wrapped his arm around her. After all, they were very close friends. He bent down and kissed her forehead and her inner smile practically broke with its size. Butterflies flurried in her stomach and she tried not to show it.

"Wait, where's Trish?" Amy asked and like the snap of two fingers, the feeling was gone.

"She's in the locker room, isn't she?" Jay asked.

"No, she left right before I came out." Lillian said, leaving Adam's grasp.

"Oh, well, I'm sure you girls will find her. Come on guys, let's get going." Matt said, walking away. Adam and Jay followed.

"We have to look for her?" Lillian asked.

Amy took a deep breath. "I guess so. Come on…"

They walked to the backstage entrance and saw her walk into a nearby bathroom. With a little dragging from Amy, they followed her.

"Hey girl! The guys have already left. Let's get going!" Amy said to Trish as she walked in the door.

"Oh, have they? Let me just fix my make up."

Amy looked at Lillian and they both rolled their eyes.

A few minutes had gone by. "Ok, all done!" Trish announced.

"Good! Come on!" Amy said and all three girls walked to the parking lot and loaded into Lillian's rental car. They drove in silence on the way to the club. Trish wasn't exactly the type of friend that Amy or Lillian would have, but she was now dating Adam, so they had to befriend her.

When they got to the club, they walked in and looked around. People were everywhere and the club was enormous! The front door led to a huge dance floor that was flooded with people. Off to the left were tables and a large staircase leading up to more tables and off to the right was the giant bar.

"Wow! Look at this place!" Amy said over the loud music. "It's great!"

She walked in and Lillian and Trish followed. After dancing a little bit, Lillian decided to find the guys and start drinking. After telling Amy what she was doing, she headed off to the stairs and started the climb. There, Adam, Jay, and Matt were laughing and drinking.

"Hey! Join us!" Adam called to her and she walked over, taking a seat between Adam and Matt. "Don't feel like dancing?" He asked her.

"Nah…I haven't been too perky lately." She forced a smile.

"What's wrong?"

"It's nothing, really. I've just had something on my mind.

"Oh, well, I better get down to the dance floor before Trish gets mad. She's controlling like that, you know." Adam said and left.

She's got you wrapped up in her satin and lace Tied around her little finger

"I don't know why he's with her." Matt said. "If he wanted a good fuck, all he had to do was get her drunk."

"No, I think he actually likes her." Jay said. "He's happier, even though she bosses him around and treats him like her little love toy."

"Really?" Lillian said. A spark of joy went off in her.

"Yea. She bosses him around a lot and it's kind of sickening!" Jay said.

'Man, if I could just get him away from her!' She thought.

She's got you thinking you could never escape Don't you know your heart's in danger

"I never would have thought that!"

"Oh yea! Don't let the blonde hair fool you!" Jay laughed.

"I hear she's an animal between the sheets, too." Matt said. "Did you see the shiner on Adam's eye that one time?"

He and Jay laughed.

"What's so funny?" Lillian turned around to see who was standing behind her. Luckily, it was Adam, but this time, Chris was with him.

"Oh…just remembering the black eye." Matt and Jay laughed again.

"Cut it out! It was only once!" He and Chris sat down.

"But that story was horrendous!" Jay laughed.

"What story?" Lillian was confused.

"Mine and Trish's…first time…" Adam said, hesitating. "She kind of…tied me up and stuff."

Chris, Matt, Jay, and Lillian all laughed.

"Guys, cut it out! You know you would have done the same thing!"

The three guys shut right up.

There's a devil in that angel face If you could only see the love you're wasting

On their way out of the club, Trish latched onto Adam's side and didn't move. Amy and Matt were all over each other and decided to take a cab back to their hotel room. Chris and Jay were talking and Lillian was lonely. It hadn't occurred to her just how much she loved Adam, but she knew in her heart that it would never happen. He didn't like girls like her. He wanted perfect bombshells and that wasn't what she was. She was only his friend.

When they got to the parking lot, Chris decided to ride to the hotel with Lillian and let Jay take Adam and Trish. So, Chris hopped in her car and they were on their way.

"What's up with you? You're acting kind of weird tonight."

"I'm fine." Lillian said.

"No, you're not. Tell me what's wrong."

Lillian looked over at him. He looked genuinely concerned.

"Ok…can you keep a secret?" She asked. She really didn't want to tell him, but she knew he could tell if she was lying.

"Of course I can. What is it?"

"Well, I…I think I'm in love with someone."

"That's great!" Chris said.

"Well, they're kind of seeing someone else."

"Oh, I see. Can I ask who it is?"

"It's Adam…"

Chris just looked at her. "Wow! I would never have guessed that!"

"Yea, but he's with Trish and they seem so happy, but I just don't think she's right for him. He needs someone a little less…'out there' and a little more down to earth; kind of like him."

She stopped at a red light.

"Well, that you are." Chris said. "I think you should tell him how you feel. It's obviously making you upset."

"I couldn't do that!" Lillian said. "He's happy with her! I wouldn't want him to hate me!"

"He won't hate you and trust me, he's not as happy as you may think. Don't be fooled by his appearance while he's around you. I know he's your best friend and everything, but he could be happier."

Those words rang in Lillian's ear.

"You know what! You're right! I should tell him how I feel! He should be with me, not her! We already know everything about each other and trust each other! What else can there be?"

Chris smiled.

I can love you better than that

I know how to make you forget her

All I'm asking is for one little chance

Cause baby I can love you, baby I can love you better

"But how can I do that? I'm completely not his type!"

"Lil…if you're the type to be his best friend, you're his type."

Lillian looked over at him. He smiled at her and grabbed her hand. She matched it.

"Thank you!"

"That's what I'm here for!"

They pulled into the hotel parking lot and got out of the car. Lillian walked him to his room and thanked him again. Then, she headed to her room, which she had to herself. She fell on her bed and thought about what to do with Adam. Finally, she decided to give him a call. She called down to the front desk, got his room number, and called him.

"He…hello?" Adam picked up.

"Hi!"

"Oh, hey. I'm a little busy. Can I call you in the morning?" He said in a rush. Lillian heard Trish giggling in the background.

"Oh…um…yea. Sure."

"Thanks, love!" He hung up the phone.

Lillian was hurt. Why had she decided to call? Right there, she decided to wait.

I'm gonna break this spell she's got on you

You're gonna wake up to find

I'm your desire, my intentions are true

Hey babe, I know in time

You're gonna see what you mean to me

So open up your eyes cause seeing is believing

The next morning, she woke up nervous. The feeling in her stomach was indescribable, but she knew it wasn't good. She took a deep breath and got out of bed. After showering and getting ready to head out on the road, she got a phone call.

"Hello?" She answered.

"Hey. You wanted to talk to me last night?" Adam said.

Lillian was surprised to hear his voice.

"Oh, right. It was nothing…just a call."

"Oh. Well, how about I come over to your room and we can drive together."

"What about Trish?"

He sighed. "She was gone when I woke up, but she told me last night that she was driving with Amy. So, I'm stuck."

"Sure! You can ride with me. I'd be alone anyway."

"Great! Thanks! I'm already ready, though." He said.

"So am I. Come on over and we can leave now." She was instantly happy.

"Alright. I'm on my way!"

They hung up the phone and Lillian darted to the mirror. She needed make up now! There was no way she was going to let him see her looking so terrible.

Minutes later, Adam knocked on the door. Lillian checked her hair one last time before answering the door.

"Hi!" Lillian said with a beaming smile as she opened the door.

"You're feeling better!" Adam said and walked into the hotel room.

"Yea."

He looked at her funny. "Are you wearing make up?"

"Yea…"

"Why?"

"What?"

"We're about to get on the road. You don't need to impress anyone." Adam said, setting his suitcase down on the floor.

"You'd be surprised." She looked away.

"Alright. Let me just take a leek and we can get going."

She politely smiled and he walked into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him. As soon as the door was closed, she collapsed on the bed.

'What is wrong with you, Lillian? He's your best friend! Snap out of it!' She said to herself.

Suddenly, the bathroom door opened and she jumped up from the bed. He looked at her funny again and grabbed his suitcase handle.

"Ready to go?" He asked, still giving her a funny face.

She tried to laugh it off, but it didn't work. "Yea. Sure."

She picked up the handle to her suitcase and grabbed her small cosmetic bag and they both left the room.

"You know, you're acting very strange today. Did you take too much medicine last night?" Adam asked her on their way to the elevator.

She laughed again, but it quickly turned into a nervous cough.

They were silent in the elevator and after turning in their key cards at the front desk, they were silent as they got into Lillian's rental car. They were even more silent all the way to the restaurant, where they were to eat breakfast. Adam stopped Lillian on her way out of the car.

"Are you going to tell me what's going on with you today?" He asked.

"Nope." Lillian said and started to get out of the car again. That is, until Adam grabbed her arm again.

"Lil…" He said, concerned. She sat back down.

"I can't tell you." She answered.

"Why not? Does it have to do with me?"

She didn't respond.

"What is it?"

I can love you better than that

I know how to make you forget her

All I'm asking is for one little chance

Cause baby I can love you, baby I can love you better

Adam's stomach growled. "Ok, tell me in there." He joked and they finally got out of the car.

After sitting down and ordering, Adam began to pry again.

"Please tell me what's wrong with you! I can't stand it anymore!"

"Nothing's wrong with me! I just have a dilemma. It's stupid, really."

"You have a crush on Chris." Adam said.

Lillian laughed. "No! Not at all! Chris and I are just good friends!"

"Ok, good. He's happy with who he's with now."

"Are you?" Lillian braved asking.

Adam hesitated. "Yea…I mean, sometimes I am and other times I'm not. She just gets under my skin too easily. The little things drive me crazy! Like, the way she always wants to control me, especially in bed! I mean, that hurts a guy's ego! The men are supposed to be the boss in bed, not the woman! And she always insists that I tell her how much I love her, even when I feel like strangling her. She is so needy! It's ridiculous! I also hate the way that, when we're fighting, she just stops and starts wanting to have sex! I know about make up sex, but that's just a little too early!"

Lillian giggled. "You two sound like you're married."

"Oh, God no! I would never marry a girl like Trish! She's just girlfriend material. I want someone who meets my needs just as much as I meet theirs and someone who loves me for me and doesn't want to change me. Someone who is smart and beautiful inside and out and can keep me on track."

Lillian was happy. Adam had just described her. She grinned.

I can love you better than that

I know how to make your forget her

All I'm asking is for one little chance

Cause baby I can love you, baby I can love you better

"Wait, how did we get on this subject? We were talking about your…" He made air quotes with his fingers. "…dilemma."

"Oh right." Her head dropped. Just then, their breakfast came.

"Just tell me! Whatever it is, I'm sure it's not that big of a deal. We can handle it!" He said, reassuring her.

"Ok…" She took a deep breath. "Well, I think I'm in love with someone, but they're with someone else."

"Talk to them." Adam said simply.

Lillian grunted in her mind. "I'm not sure if they'd like me or not."

Adam grabbed her hand. "Lil, who wouldn't like you? You're amazing!"

She blushed. "I just feel like, if I tell this person, a huge weight will be lifted from me."

"Then, tell them!"

"They won't like me like I like them."

"You don't know that! This person could be in love with you, too!"

"I doubt it…"

Adam grunted.

"I…I don't know what to say…" Her mind drew a blank at just the thought of Adam being in love with her, too.

"Just tell him how much you like him."

"I do already."

Adam looked at her confused.

"He's a good friend of mine."

"Oh."

Lillian looked into his eyes and felt gratitude for how much he just wanted to help her. "You're my best friend Adam and I love you for that."

"I love you, too."

I can love you better than that

I know how to make you forget her

All I'm asking is for one little chance

Cause baby I can love you, baby I can love you better

"So, are you going to talk to him?" Adam asked.

Lillian looked at him and smiled. "I just did."

Adam hesitated and sat back in his seat, his hand leaving Lillian's. "Oh."

Lillian immediately felt guilty. "Adam…"

"You want to know something weird?"

Lillian was confused. "Huh?"

"I've fantasized about being with you for years. Ever since you started with the company, actually. The only problem is, you had a boyfriend then and when you dumped him, I was seeing Nora. All Trish was supposed to be was a rebound; someone I could fuck without repercussion. But I didn't want her. I've always wanted you. I wanted my claim to fame to be Lillian Garcia. That's it! That's why I tried to be as close to you as possible, but instead, we became best friends."

"I know how you feel. Something sparked inside me when you got with Trish." She grabbed his hand again. "She's not right for you, Adam!"

"You're right. She's not."

I can love you better than that

I know how to make you forget her

All I'm asking is for one little chance

Cause baby I can love you, baby I can love you better

"But what do I do now?" Adam asked. "She'll kill me if I break up with her!"

"She won't kill you!" Lillian laughed. "She'll maybe threaten to and hate you, but she's not worth it anyway!" She said.

Adam laughed and without warning, he leaned over the table and locked his lips onto Lillian's. Lillian cupped his face and made the kiss deeper.

Adam broke it. "Come on, let's get out of here!" He said and threw some money on the table. He grabbed her hand and they rushed off to the rental car. When they got in the car, Lillian went back to kissing him. After a good make out session, Lillian realized what time it was.

"We better get out of here!" She said.

"Yea, you're right." Adam said. Lillian turned on the car and drove out of the parking lot, getting back on the highway. Adam casually turned the radio on and grabbed Lillian's hand. She smiled at him and kept driving.

They had gone about 30 miles and Adam was still holding and rubbing Lillian's hand. Just then, "Your Body Is A Wonderland" came on the radio and Lillian looked over at Adam, who was just staring at her with a slight grin on his face. She pulled the car over onto the side of the road and kissed Adam again. The kiss got deeper and she crawled onto his lap, straddling him. Adam's hands roamed all over her body and caressed her stomach under her shirt. Lillian's hands went straight to Adam's hair.

They took a quick break from kissing for just enough time to pull Lillian's shirt off over her head. Lillian did the same to Adam and Adam's hands went behind Lillian to unhook her bra. When it came undone, if flew right off of her and her breasts bounced with the sudden freedom. Adam examined her and held her chin before going back to kissing her. His hands roamed again, only this time, they roamed her bare chest as well, stopping to play with her erect nipples.

Moans escaped Lillian under Adam's lips and Adam parted them. Lillian licked them and slid her tongue into his mouth. Adam unbuttoned her jeans and pulled them down. Lillian lifted up and they were pushed down to her ankles. As she explored Adam's mouth with her tongue again, she unbuttoned Adam's pants. After getting them undone, Adam pushed them down and moved his boxers down. His member was freed and ready.

Lillian grabbed it and worked it over a bit more, with low moans escaping from Adam. Finally, he felt as if he was going to explode.

"Lil…don't!" He managed to say.

She caught on and lifted up on Adam, positioning herself on him. Slowly, she dropped down on him and he went inside. Lillian moaned and Adam gripped her small hips. As she began to move on top of him, Adam's breath became short. He squeezed Lillian's hips and she rocked her hips in a circular motion. A loud moan came from Lillian, followed by more and more. Adam groaned and his head smacked the headrest. He looked up at Lillian, who was bouncing on top of him and saw how beautiful she was. Lillian's hands rubbed on Adam's chest and she bent down and kissed him. Adam stopped kissing back after a few seconds and a low growl came from his throat.

"Together…" He said, after a struggle.

Lillian shook her head rapidly and Adam's hand moved down to her area. His finger gently massaged her love button and her eyes locked on Adam. Just then, they both came together. Both of them had unbelievable orgasms and rode them out together.

After both of them calmed down, Lillian cupped Adam's face and passionately kissed him. She pulled up from his lips and rested her head on his sweaty forehead.

"I've always loved you, Lillian." Adam whispered.

"I love you, too, Adam!"

She kissed him one more time and got back in her seat. They put their clothes back on and Lillian put the car back in drive.

I can love you better than that

I know how to make you forget her

All I'm asking is for one little chance

Cause baby I can love you, baby I can love you better

Lillian and Adam drove in a comfortable silence, listening to whatever song came on the radio for the whole trip.

When they got there, Adam called Trish and broke up with her. Like Lillian had predicted, she threatened to kill him and yelled that she hated him before hanging up on him after he told her what had happened, but none of that mattered to him. He was with her now. The woman of his dreams.

While Adam was ending things with Trish, Lillian reminisced about their trip. Her emotions got to her and she cried a happy tear as she finally did something for her that she knew was the right thing to do. She wouldn't have been able to live with herself if she hadn't told her best friend how she felt about him. She could tell that this was going to be a relationship that lasted.

I can love you better than that I can love you better

I can love you better than that

Baby I can love you, baby I can love you better…

Adam went back over to Lillian in the hotel lobby and grabbed her hand. They looked in each other's eyes and smiled. Then, they walked, hand-in-hand, to their hotel room.