Remember

by Arwen Sauron

A song fic feat. Remember (I.O.U) by Big Dismal

When I was a young child, you watched over me.

Harry ran his fingers along the faded picture. His mother smiled up at him, as she stroked the small baby asleep in her arms. Harry tried to remember what it was like. What it must've been like to be cradled in the arms of Lily Potter. All his life, all he wanted was to have one moment just to experience that again. All he wanted was to curl up in his mothers lap and to feel her smiling warmly at him. Why couldn't he remember?

You kept me safe inside your arms, and then you set me free.

The day that Lily Potter had died was the day she had set Harry free. She had held him as long as she could, and then she let him go. She wanted him to live a normal life. No matter how much she knew that that wasn't possible. Harry sometimes wondered what his mother had been thinking when she had died. What had she seen? What flashed across her mind, the second before she had let him go.

So I flew away like a bird, not knowing which way to go. The light you give me inside, it will always glow.

Every night before Harry let himself be swept off into his dreams, he thought to himself. "Would my mother be proud of me? What would she think if she saw me now? Does she still love me after seeing what I've become?" All he could hope is that he was everything she had wanted him to be. All he could dream, is that she was proud of him.

And I want to remember, all the times we shared. And I won't ever forget your face, you know your hands were always there.

Harry returned his gaze to the picture that was held tightly in his hands. He brought it up to his chest and lay it gently on his heart. He wanted her to hear the soft beating of his heart. For her to know that he was okay. He wanted her to know how much he loved her. He loved her more than he had ever loved anyone. His mother, who had spent countless nights knowing that the end was coming. Knowing very well that she was facing her last days. She could have hidden away, but she stayed, with his father, and they waited. They knew that they had made a mistake and that there was nothing to protect them now. But Lily Potter went to the greatest lengths just to save the life of her son. Just to give Harry a chance. All she wanted was to be able to see him grow up, and Harry knew that she could see him now.

And still you're strong when I'm weak, it never seems to fade.

Harry knew it had been his mother, pushing him when he was faced with things he thought impossible. When he had been at the Department of Mysteries just months ago, it was his mother who stood with him, holding his hand. It had been his mother who had given him the strength to hold onto the Prophecy. Without her, he would have given in. But his mother was strong for him. It wasn't Harry who had defeated the basilisk, it was Lily Potter. It wasn't Harry who had saved his godfather from the dementors, it was Lily Potter. If it wasn't for his mother, Harry would have never escaped from the clutches of Lord Voldemort, during the TriWaizard Tournament. She had given him time. TOld him to go, while she had held back his fate. Saving his life again.

I can hear your voice here with me, whenever I'm awake.

Harry lay silently on his bed, with the picture of his mother, resting over his heart. He closed his eyes, waiting for her. He knew she would come and talk to him. He knew it. She had to. He needed her. She wouldn't leave him here like this. She loved him. Harry lay waiting. All he wanted was to wait. That's all.

And I know you'll be there 'til the end. Until the end of time.

He knew she would come. She promised.

Because you sacrificed it all, just to give me life.

His mother had given her life, for him. Just for him. She could have just as quickly handed him over to his death, but she chose to die, so that he didn't have to. Because she had loved him so much, he was safe from Lord Voldemort. He hadn't been able to kill Harry. Because the love surrounding Harry was too powerful for someone who all they knew was hate. Lord Voldemort would never be able to grasp the meaning of love. He was everything thatlove wasn't. And Harry was given all the love in the world.

And I want to remember, all the times we shared. And I won't ever forget your face, you know your hands were always there.

Harry started to wonder wether his mother would come or not. Maybe he was wrong. Maybe she didn't love him after all. Maybe she regretted giving her life, just for Harry. That was it. He wan't good enough. He had been lying to himself all along.

You made me the man I am, the man I am today. And for that I owe you everything.

Harry opened his eyes and held up the picture he had dreamt about for years. This was what he wanted. All he wanted. But he could never have it. Harry could feel his ears pounding. Tears had begun to stream violently down Harry's pale skin.

It's been so long, I can't go on. Without you by my side.

His mind started to flood with thoughts. His whole life was just a joke. The joke was on him. His parents never really cared about him. It was all just pretend. For laughs, he bet. Harry let his tears fall gently onto the picture and watched them roll off the tattered and worn corners. He slowly began to tear the picture into little pieces. He didn't want to see them anymore. They were a joke. He picked up the remains of the picture and walked over to the window resting on the wall beside his bed. He glanced around, with tears glazing his eyes, and made sure the others were still asleep. He looked at Ron. "What is Ron going to think?...He's just the same as my parents, a joke." He turned back to the window and pushed out the heavy glass doors. He began to climb up onto the ledge.

He could feel the wind pounding his face, turning his tears to ice. He reached his arms out, and opened his hands, revealing what was left of his parents. Before he could blink, the torn pieces were being carried away into the night. He let his arms fall to his sides and took one last longing look behind him. He returned his gaze to the stars hanging in the sky overhead. He let his knees fall, bringing his whole body with him.

Millions of images flashed across his mind. He knew this was it. But who would really miss him anyway? He was getting closer. Then his mind went blank, and it stopped.

All he could remember was her voice. It was echoing clearly in his head. He was flying again. Just flying. Nothing else. No worries. He felt his body come to a rest against something soft. He tried to open his eyes. But he couldn't.

He could feel the soft touch of a hand on his cheek.

He could feel warm lips touching his forehead.

She stroked his hair, pushing it gently out of his green eyes.

And then she was gone.


Well...what did you think? I'm quite happy with the way it turned out. Please review. Please please please. Thanks.