Farewell

by

Chibijem

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters herein and am making no financial gain from this piece of fiction.

A/N: This is my first Blood+ fan fiction; There are so many gaps in the story and this is my thoughts on one of them. Set after the confrontation with Liza/Amshel in Yekaterinburg.

Haji groaned and lifted his head from the blood soaked snow. He sat up gingerly, the hole in his torso, made by Liza, still healing. He sat and saw in the distance part of Saya's katana sticking up in the snow. He began to feel the prickling of fear when he did not see her nearby. He carefully got to his feet and walking toward the hotel, saw what could only have been Saya's footprints tracking into the building. He hastened his pace, as much as his healing body would allow and when he reached her room, pushed open the unlatched door. He felt faint relief when he saw her settling the ice pack on Riku's forehead and pull the blankets around him.

"Saya..." His soft voice called across the room. When she made no response to him, he called out to her again. Receiving no answer again, he sidled up to her and laid a hand on her shoulder. His eyes widened when she shrugged it off. "What are you doing?" He asked when she started putting some clothes in a bag.

She turned and looked up at him, sadness and hurt in her gaze. "Why didn't you tell me?" When he looked away, she went on. "You can tell me later. For now, I want you to take me to the Zoo." She told him, pulling on her coat.

"If that is your wish." He said simply; he turned, gathered his cello and went to his own room to gather his other belongings. She followed and out of the corner of his eye saw she was not carrying what was left of her sword. He sighed, knowing she was in a state of utter confusion and also knew to force her to talk about it would only make matters worse.

Haji made his way back to where Saya was sitting in the train station. "The train leaves in 45 minutes. We should arrive in Moscow in time to catch the connecting one to Warsaw. Or would you rather head south and go by sea?" When Saya shrugged her shoulders and virtually ignored him, he sat next to her quietly. "Saya..."

"Not now." Was her only response. She had even turned her head away and seemed to study the people milling around the station.

Hagi kept quiet but studied Saya intensely; he had wanted to tell her the truth but knew instinctively she had not been ready to hear it. Now everything was out in the open and her heart lay in tatters, her head a mass of uncertainty. He did not blame himself, rather he laid it on Liza...that Chevalier, he thought with disgust. I have not strayed from the path and my duty as Saya's Chevalier.

The boarding call for their train roused Saya from her study and she wearily got to her feet, Hagi following, carrying their things. When they reached their seats and the train was underway, Saya turned away from him again and watched the passing countryside.

"Saya?" When he was not acknowledged, Hagi lay his hand on her arm. As he felt her muscles tense as if to brush him off, he tightened his grip. He was satisfied when Saya turned her head in his direction though she did not meet his gaze. "Do you wish to go overland or by sea to Bordeaux?"

Saya studied the hand on her arm, the slender but strong fingers, slightly calloused from years of playing the cello. She trusted the man whose fingers touched her, but she was feeling hurt and betrayed. She shook her head, not caring either way; she knew he would decide what was best.

The trip to Moscow was several hours, hours that were silent. Hagi was comfortable with it and took that time to think about everything that had happened since he had first seen Saya in the shopping district in her home town back in Okinawa. He hurt for her losses; not just the death of her father but for the loss of her lifestyle and her friendships. He knew that last Sunday, Saya, Kai and Riku and their friends had spent on the beach was their way of saying goodbye. Goodbye to that life and to innocence. He had kept his distance even though Riku had tried to include him; he had not wanted to intrude on their last hours of a carefree life. So he had joined in the only way he could---he had played for them and their fireworks. He recalled the small kernel of fear when Saya had jumped off the train to save Riku and had disappeared. When he found her and she had told him of her dream, he was saddened. She still had not recovered all her memories, especially not their promise. There was still time and he hoped by going to the Zoo, she would get the answers she sought and more of her memories would return.

When Saya shifted in her sleep, her head fell onto his shoulder; Hagi lifted an arm and brought her closer to him, wrapping an arm around her. He smiled inwardly as she moved closer, tucking her head under his chin. When the train officials announced they would be arriving in Moscow shortly, he loathed to wake her. He knew upon waking, he would be the recipient of a cold shoulder and attitude. "Saya." It was inevitable and delaying would get him nowhere.

It was during the leg to Warsaw, Hagi noticed Saya's appetite diminish. He knew she wasn't only not hungry due to her chaotic feelings but it was also a way for her to punish herself for being what she hunted--a Chiropteran. He remembered while he had gone to get the tickets for the train to Warsaw, watching her out of the corner of his eye as she sat forlornly, almost closing in on herself. When they had reached Moscow, he had decided it would be best to travel by land on the off chance they were attacked on their journey. That way they would have more room to maneuver; going by boat would have taken away that advantage.

Hagi turned back from watching the other passengers, to see Saya tucking the half-eaten snack into a pocket. "You need to keep your strength up." he told her.

She closed her eyes, shutting him out again. "Hagi, just...Just...don't."

The knowledge she didn't want to talk to him, wouldn't even look at him, hurt him terribly. He loved her to his core; from the early days at the zoo, from the antagonism had grown a fondness which was now an adult love, at least on his part. He knew Saya was still beset with doubts and was wary of him, even more so now. He cursed that chevalier for interfering, for putting this aggravating distance between them. He hoped with this trip to the Zoo, Saya's feelings for him would begin to grow again. He stood up when Saya's head began to droop. He laid her down on the sleeping berth and covered her with the blanket, gently brushing the hair from her eyes. He leaned down and pressed the softest of kisses to her forehead.

He was walking back to Saya in the Berlin train station when he felt a presence. One he could not identify, but it was enough to put his guard up. He sat next to her and frowned when she moved slightly away. "Saya," he sighed, growing tired of being ignored and of the sadness rolling off her in waves. "I've booked us on the train directly to Lyon. From there..."

"I'll walk from there." Saya told him firmly, staring at her shoes.

"If that is your wish." He said in agreement. Maybe she feels this presence too, he thought. He had felt the same aura several times during the trip from Warsaw; it had both puzzled and worried him. At least by walking to Bordeaux, we won't be endangering a train full of innocent passengers. He attempted to hand her a sack from which a tantalizing aroma was wafting. She shook her head, "You need to eat. It's been far too long." When he tried again and was refused, he knelt before her. "Please, Saya." He laid his human hand on her knee, squeezing it tenderly. To his satisfaction, she met his eyes briefly before taking the bag from his open hand. He studied her as she picked apart the food and actually ate some of it before wrapping it back up and handing it back to him. "Saya..."

"Maybe later." She replied closing her eyes and resting her head on her folded knees.

As Saya settled in for the night in their train car, he was surprised when she asked him to play for her. He took his cello out of the case, waxed to bow and began the tune she had taught him long ago. He heard her shift and felt her eyes watching him. He was lost in the music when her heard the soft question.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

He kept playing, nearing the end of the piece. He settled the bow across the strings and met her eyes in the moonlight. "You were not and are not ready to hear it." He said truthfully.

"Hagi...I'm... I'm so confused." The whisper speaking volumes.

"I know." Settling the cello gently back in it's case, he came to kneel before her. "Whatever words I can say, will not be enough. Only you can find the answers you seek."

"Typical Hagi answer." Saya's words tinged with anger.

"The words are true nonetheless. If I could give you the answers you seek, I would." He cupped her cheek, rubbing a bandaged thumb along the high bone. "It pains me to see you sad and hurt."

"I still don't understand." Saya sighed, sleep coloring her words.

Hagi, pulled the covers up to keep her warm, "Rest, Saya. There will be time." He sat on the other berth and watched over her, the moon watching over them both.

They were walking along a country road, heading toward Bordeaux. The early morning sun warming them. Hagi silently following his companion. He knew Saya was annoyed by his closeness but he wanted to be close as he could be. He had felt the unidentifiable presence again when they were leaving Lyon and it made him more vigilant. Little progress had been made in Saya's confusion and attitude during the journey from Berlin. He knew she needed time, but he also knew time was something not to be wasted.

It was late morning when he noticed Saya's pace slowing. They had been walking for several hours and he knew she had not eaten since Berlin. He was now truly worried; Saya needed food to keep her strength up. He also knew she had not slept well since Yekaterinburg, her subconscious not letting her mind rest. "Saya, we should rest a bit." He called out to her.

"I'm fine." Came the stern and irritated reply.

"You need to rest and eat." He countered.

Saya whirled and came face to chest with her chevalier. She pressed a finger into his hard chest. "I need answers." She angrily told him, tilting her head to look up at him.

"They will come. But first, please...?" Slate gray eyes meeting brown. He watched as she walked over to a large tree and sat in the shade. He sat close to her and was dismayed when she declined the snack he offered.

"I know you've said I wasn't ready for the truth. When did you think I would have been?" She asked, picking up a fallen leaf and studying it.

"It doesn't matter now. You know the truth." He turned his head to stare at the top of hers.

"I feel like you all made me out to be the fool."

"Never! That was no one's intention, Saya." He replied, turning his body to face her fully. "We were trying to protect you...I was trying to protect you."

"Protect me?' Saya got to her feet, walked a few feet away and turned to look at him. "Are you sure you were trying to protect me? Or was it you, yourself, you were protecting, Hagi?" When he just continued to meet her gaze without uttering a word, she turned on her heel and starting walking again. He silently got to his feet, pulled the cello case onto his shoulder and followed. He could hear a truck coming, along with the sound of snorting pigs. Maybe we can ride with the driver. It would hurry us along to the answers she desperately needs, he thought as he turned to see the truck approaching and slowing for them.

FIN