It was a dark and stormy night. Gackt sat alone clutching the blankets in a brightly colored room in the dark. So it was dark. In the room. He was watching "Pretty Cure MaxHeart the 2nd Movie: Friends of the Snow-Laden Sky".
Haruhi walked in with a bowl of popcorn and said, "You know Ga—"
"AARRRHHEEEAAAA—" "AYYYYEEEIIIGGRAAA!" Gackt screamed, and then Haruhi screamed, dropping the bowl and spilling it all over the floor.
"...Gackt," said Haruhi, looking down at the mess he, well, caused her to make.
"Ah...Um...Yeah... Never happened... Sorry...mmm..." said Gackt, composing himself and then continuing to watch his movie. But then!..., a power puff girls-esque phone rang, and they both lunged for it. In mid-air, Gackt pushed Haruhi back and she landed on the popcorn bowl.
"Ow, damnit!" she cursed. (lol cursed)
"Hellloo?" said Gackt sweetly, answering the phone.
"This is an emergency. There has been a kidnapping on 22 Jump Street. Go right away," The voice on the other line cut out.
Gackt slammed down the phone hard and declared, "LOOKS LIKE WE'VE GOT WORK TO DO!" (cue good background music!)
Haruhi hopped up and called out, "SUUUUPPAAA..."
"SUUUGGOOOIIII," continued Gackt.
"TERUUUUU-PORUTO!" they both said simultaneously, clapping their hands together, and there was a big thunder crash, and a flash of rainbowy colors. In a split second, they appeared at the entrance of a dark alley.
"Scary. Typical kidnapping scene, huh?" Haruhi said, looking down into the alley.
"Hey... Isn't this...?" Gackt said, noticing a headdress on the ground and picking it up, "That uhh...that one's...?"
"You mean...? Hey lemme see that," said Haruhi, grabbing and inspecting it.
Haruhi dangled it in front of Gackt's face and announced, "I have come to the conclusion our victim is Sugintou!"
"Are you kidding me...?" said Gackt, dumbfounded, "How do you know that just by that one piece of evidence? I'm supposed to be the smart one..."
"Well," said Haruhi, putting her hands on her hips, "I know the headdress is hers, so, and that she's too tiny to kidnap anyone!"
Gackt stared blankly, "How do you even know that's to do with the kidnapping? She could have just left it here... Who would be so careless as to leave something like that behind anyways?"
"Well you see...Well... umm...Everyone makes mistakes sometimes okay? Plus, I don't think they would even know if someone was kidnapped in the first place if there was no evidence!" explained Haruhi, sort of, "And why would she be here in the first place? Why does she even exist? We're both real people, what is an anime doll doing here?"
"I think you're getting too technical," said Gackt, "This is just for fun...Aren't you a cartoon too...?"
"THAT'S ENOUGH! There's a reason for everything!" said Haruhi proudly, "And I will get to the bottom of this!"
"I'm here too..." said Gackt quietly.
"But I think we need more evidence to continue," said Haruhi, completely ignoring Gackt. She then got down on her knees and waddled around, looking for even a tiny piece of evidence. Gackt sighed and did the same, but with a lot less effort and enthusiasm.
"I don't think we're going to find anything," said Gackt, looking up from a garbage can, after about 15 minutes of investigating.
"You have no spirit!" said Haruhi, "Plus, I already found a ton of stuff. I just didn't tell you."
"...," said... or...not...said...Gackt, "...What did you find...?"
Haruhi pulled out Sugintou's entire outfit from behind her back, "This evidence makes me think this was a rape-kidnapping!"
"Who would rape then kidnap someone," wondered Gackt aloud, "Wouldn't you just kill them after."
"Not if you want them for a sex slave because you're tired of your computer wife after years of torture and slavery!" said Haruhi proudly, "Actually... I was lying about that last part. But Sugintou isn't dead."
"...And you know this ...how...?" asked Gackt, gagging a little from the garbage.
"Well you see! You can't kill Sugintou... because she's a doll." Haruhi stated simply, "Unless you took out her batteries or whatever..."
"You know we could have filled up like a billion pages of us trying to figure that out," said Gackt, "God does not make a good person in fan fictions."
"I have a feeling this is only the beginning." Haruhi said aloofly.
"...Which means ultimately this is gonna be a long mission," said Gackt, and then he remembered something, "Oh no! What about my movie?"
"Gackt, you're so dumb!" scolded Haruhi, "You have it on DVD! You can watch it any time you want!"
"But..., said Gackt, clasping his hands to his chest, "This is my first time watching it. It's special."
Haruhi sighed and did that thing where you kinda grab your nose, "You're hopeless."
So Gackt and Haruhi returned to Bou's house, where they were both staying, and Gackt went off to finish watching his movie. Haruhi sat bored-ly in the kitchen, staring at the design on the cupboard handles, thinking mostly about where the new evidence would be, and what sort of things it would lead to. Bou opened the door suddenly and startled Haruhi a little.
"I'm back...!" Bou said quietly, but still sort of in an announcing voice.
"Welcome back..." said Haruhi, putting her head into her hands.
"Hmm? What's wrong..." said Bou, putting down a bunch of a shopping bags next to the doorway, "Ah... and where's Gackt?"
"He's in your bedroom, watching the movie he got last week." Haruhi told him..
"I see. I still don't see why he had to wait a whole week to watch it!" said Bou, laughing a little and picking up one of the shopping bags and putting it straight into the fridge, and taking things out of the others and putting them on the counter or in the fridge. Haruhi just kind of stared at Bou scurrying around. Like a mouse. Gackt came in a minute later.
"That was sooo the best movie ever!" Gackt declared, "Honoka looked like, 10 times cuter than in the TV show!"
"Hmm, really?" said Bou, still putting things away, "Maybe I'll watch it...Oh! I got this super cute outfit for this super cool party that's going on soon! I...umm... was supposed to invite lots of people to it, so do you guys want to come?"
"What sort of party is it...?" asked Gackt, who started helping put things away.
"Umm, " Bou reached into his pocket and pulled out a folded piece of paper and handed it to Gackt, "This is the poster for it. You should have seen it somewhere before, they're everywhere!"
Gackt unfolded it and looked at the big words at the top.
"Dynamite Rave," said Gackt, reading aloud.
Haruhi looked up and snatched the paper away from Gackt, reading through it very quickly, "I saw lots of these in the alleyway!" she announced.
Gackt politely took the paper back and said, "I think it looks familiar too. It sounds pretty exciting, I want to go. But...why a DYNAMITE rave?"
"Because Dynamite sounds so much more exciting!" said Bou.
Gackt looked at the paper a bit, and then gasped, "Wait a minute...isn't...Sugintou...?"
Haruhi blinked, "Sugintou---what?" she grabbed the paper quickly again and looked it through again, "I don't see it," she said.
"At the bottom there..." Gackt tapped at the bottom of the paper, "'Special guest star SUGINTOU!'"
"Oh ho ho!" said Haruhi, "We have ourselves a location! ...21 Jump Street!"
"That was the same place we went to before..." said Gackt.
"But it was just an alley! What the..." said Haruhi, confused, "There must be something more to it!"
"Then again, you know, we never did go all the way down that alleyway," said Gackt.
"Hey guys, It's getting pretty late, you should go to bed instead of doing all this 'magical girl' work right now," said Bou, "You can sort it out in the morning."
"I think tonight would be better...but, It is late, and we can always wait for tomorrow, " agreed Gackt.
"You guys are hopeless, and will never be good detectives!" yelled Haruhi, "...Good night," she finished, and walked into the living room and collapsed on the couch.
"Good night." said Gackt at her, then looked at Bou, "Good night to you too."
"Sweet dreams" said Bou, who tip-toed to his room and shut the door behind him.
Gackt sat in the kitchen for a few minutes in silence, until Haruhi said, "I can see you. It's bothering me," which is when he went into the bathroom and into the bathtub (which had a blanket and pillow in it) and went to sleep.
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lol :( uh oh.
btw
Gackt is from Gackt
Bou is from ANCAFE
Haruhi is from Suzumiya Haruhi no Yuutsu
Sugintou is from Rozen Maiden
Just so you know