My first attempt at fan fiction in a while. Er, I like Wendy and I don't like how she's portrayed as this evil bitch in a lot of Style fics.

Yeah, review please. C:

He'd stopped throwing up.

At first, I was excited. You know? I thought, "Wow, Stan's finally comfortable around me!" Our kissing stopped being interrupted by his nervous stomach. I could cuddle with him for hours on his couch and he wouldn't need to excuse himself to go to the bathroom to avoid making a mess. We even got so far as my shirt coming off once; there he was, feeling my breasts over my bra. No problems.

Then he started again.

Except, not around me. Not because of me.

At first, I thought he was just sick. Everyone did. People were worried. Though, I caught on really quickly. It wasn't hard to read and I wasn't sure how no one else saw it. I don't think Stan even knows it himself. He was oblivious that way.

It wasn't Bebe. It wasn't Red. It was worse. So much worse. It hurt so much once it dawned on me, because I knew I could never compete.

From the other side of the cafeteria, I'm ignoring my friends to stare at Stan. And Kyle's sitting next to him. Stan said something to get the others to laugh, but he looks for his best friend's reaction first. Kyle slings an arm around his shoulders as a sort-of hug. Stan looks green. And red.

Everyone turns when he knocks his tray onto the ground, the loud clang capturing their attention. Everyone seems worried as he empties his stomach onto the tiles violently. I only look back at my food and pick at the lunch the school provided, deciding that I may like to risk eating the macaroni.

I hear Bebe scolding me, telling me I should be more concerned. I hear Red telling her that I probably was.

I wasn't.

Stan is mine. I love him. I'm not willing to give him up.

At least, not yet.

I could never ask him to stop hanging around Kyle. That would only hurt the both of them. I didn't want that. I didn't want that for either of them.

But it's not as if I'm going to just hand him over. I know it's selfish of me, but I'd like to hang on to this rediculous notion that he and I are going to get married. Hang on to the idea that he and I are going to start a family. For a little while longer.

For a while, I kept telling myself that he was just confused and needed to sort out his feelings. He's going through that phase that I was mostly sure that everyone went through at some point after hitting puberty. I mean, even I've looked at Bebe a few times as she changed in the locker room.

I'm watching Stan from across Token's living room, past the many guests of the party. And he kisses Kyle. Kyle seems surprised, but no one else notices. Kyle kisses him back. I feel my stomach churning and I think I smiled since my lips were tight and I tasted something bitter. I wonder, idly, if Stan feels the need to throw up as much as I do.

Everyone looked over when Stan shoved Kyle away roughly, knocking him into someone standing nearby. They look worried, or disgusted, as he turns and hurls his lunch from earlier out onto someone's shoes.

My eyes are wet and I need to leave.

I'm not sure if they've addressed what happened. As far as I can tell, they're acting normally around each other.

Stan hasn't told me.

He kisses me and smiles at me and hugs me and tells me that I'm beautiful and that he loves me.

I'm watching, confused, as my mom jumps up and down in excitement. She'd just opened a letter. She's telling me about sending an application for me to Harvard. She tells me that she knew I wouldn't myself. She tells me that she knew I wanted to go to the local college with Stan. She tells me that I was accepted. She tells me to consider it.

I'm avoiding looking at Stan's expression as I tell him that I'm going to Harvard. I don't want to see him sad. Or worse, I don't want to see him pretending to be sad for my sake. He's crying a little bit as he hugs me and telling me that he'll call me every day.

"After graduation, I think we should break up."

Stan stiffens; he pulls away.

"For good."

I tell him that we should enjoy ourselves until then. He smiles and kisses me, telling me that promises that he will.

I know I'm being selfish, but I want Stan to be mine for a little while longer. It's shallow of me, but as long as I can be the one to leave him, I can walk out of this with some sanity. After high school, I don't mind giving Stan to Kyle. Until then, I just hope he keeps telling me that he loves me. I hope that he keeps hugging me. I hope he keeps kissing me.

Even if he's imagining someone else as soon as he closes his eyes.