Interview with Alu (pronounced Ah-lou)
Note: A first-timer's Invader Zim fan-fiction. Similar to her predecessor, Zim, Alu ( "Lou" as she calls herself on Earth) has a companion SIR with her to help her in her conquest to invade Earth, but there is always one girl standing in her way, the school news reporter Alegra Randolph.
Chapter 1—Like Others Before Her
Alu had recalled tales of her predecessor Zim since she was hatched and prepared for the great day of assignment. As other Irkens like herself she hoped the Tallest would send her to invade a planet for possible conquest. She had been waiting her whole life for this, but then her dreams were dashed by the all-knowing Tallest's decision. They had planned for her to be sent to Earth, which she didn't wish to travel to after Zim had experienced so much trouble with one Earther named Dib (and his sister Gaz). Yet, she wanted to meet her idol that she strove to be so much like. She hadn't done anything so horrible to have her "banished" to Earth, she was simply incompetent when it came to invasion. Yet, with her SIR (which she named Rigel), the Tallest had faith she would gain more confidence and the experience necessary for taking over a planet.
Alu found Earth pleasant, save for the rains that would hit unexpectedly. Fortunately, she had packed environmental suits that kept her skin from being burned by the Earth's rain. It wasn't known why Irken skin couldn't tolerate Terran rain, but whatever the reason, she always found herself prepared, and never left without necessities necessary for survival. She could already see herself now, thousands of pathetic humans bowing at her feet, calling her Mistress, doing whatever she pleased. Before long, the planet would be taken by force by the Irken Empire as Zim failed to do. Yet, she never counted on one plucky reporter by the name of Alegra Randolph.
Chapter 2—Interrogated by the Enemy
"Lou" adapted to school exceptionally well and she excelled in everything. She felt privileged to be attending the same school that her idol had, but wondered what had ever happened to him. Perhaps he was lurking about in the town somewhere, plotting a nefarious scheme to trick the humans into following him. She didn't know, but she had a feeling she would meet him later, and unfortunately, encounter his adversary as well.
In her class, Lou encountered a young reporter by the name of Alegra who noticed she wasn't like the other students at school. Alegra noticed that at certain times, Lou broke out in hives, and ate food in a very processed form, or limited herself to junk food. Never once did Lou gain weight, which was also strange as well.
She wore different clothing than the other students and she had an odd way about her she couldn't quite put her finger on. She and her other friends, who were also part of the journalism faction in the school, wanted to know every little thing about Lou. Alegra was the only girl that thought perhaps Lou was an alien, since she delved into the paranormal and believed some conspiracy theories that weren't popular with the general public. Lou perceived her as a threat as well as her friends. Something had to be done to stop her, but what ?
Alou sat at home with Rigel in his usual robotic form and noticed the pull of advertising on the implement humans called the television. With some tweaking here and there from the local broadcasting station, she could altar those waves and bend the people of earth to her whims. Then conquest would be easy. Or so she thought. As she tried getting a part time job at the local station, she noticed that she was being followed by Alegra and her band of inquisitive cohorts.
"Where are you really from, Lou…if that is your real name ?", Alegra questioned out of the blue. Alou was walking her 'teacup Yorkie', not really paying any attention to them. But she thought of a lie that was actually plausible.
"Originally I come from Jersey. I know that's a way from here, but to be honest, I prefer the slower suburban life versus the noisy clatter of the city.", Lou said, with a smile.
"That makes sense. She must've lost her accent since then.", Juanita observed and the other girls agreed.
"Juanita ! I can't believe you. Of all the junior reporters, you're the most skeptical of us all. Why would you take Lou at her word ? For all we know, she's lying to us.", Alegra mentioned.
"But her eyes haven't shifted. It's the clear-cut marker of a liar.", a black student by the name of Hope said.
"Hope's right.", a fair-skinned, short brown-haired girl named Myrtle agreed.
"I'd love to continue this chat, but I have an interview to conduct.", Lou stated, walking her teacup Yorkie into the building.
The presence of Rigel wasn't even noticed as Alou walked into the broadcasting studio, but she noticed someone familiar. She recognized his face from the historical documents she had seen about Zim. It was Dib, Zim's sworn enemy, and he was speaking to the public about aliens. How much did this one particular earther know about alien life forms ? That was the question that was bothering Alou, yet she didn't let it bother her too terribly much.
Dib didn't seem to recognize Alou as a possible alien, since she kept a low-profile and her costume was much more elaborate. She didn't seem all that much different from everyday human beings.
"I haven't seen you here before. You must be new. I'm Dib.", Dib said introducing himself and offering his hand to her. Politely she shook it and smiled falsely, feeling more like grimacing than anything. This was the nemesis that Zim had faced, and she instantly loathed him. He was a worthy adversary, even when he wasn't combating her hero.
"I'm Lou. Perhaps sometime you could introduce me to Zim, I would very much like to meet him.", Lou said.
"Oh, yes…You could help me defeat him. I haven't seen him in years but that doesn't mean he's not plotting something nefarious. I'll keep you in mind, Lou. Oh, break a leg in there, I'm sure your interview will go well.", Dib said as he walked out of the room with a slight strut. She sighed and grumbled.
She didn't want the guy to be drooling all over her, but he was an indirect link to Zim. In time, perhaps she could join forces with her idol and conquer the planet from within.
After talking at length to the people that were responsible for the public broadcast, she felt as though she had made a huge impression on them. She knew that phase one of her plan was going along well. She would have to wait until all the interviews and resumes had been reviewed before phase two of the plan would come into order. At least Alegra hadn't stuck around to ask her anymore questions. Fortunately, Alou didn't have to live by the human rule of "curfew", so she would be out late at night searching for Dib's residence. If she could follow clues that he unknowingly left behind, she would be closer to meeting Zim in the flesh.
Chapter 3—Joining Forces
It was a rainy day, and Alou had prepared herself with her full-body poncho. No one thought it was strange, save for Alegra and her cronies. Oh, Alu loathed them all. One day there wouldn't be any Alegras to get in her way, and what a glorious day that would be !
The teacher, an unusually chipper sort, was expecting to be a mother soon, so they would be receiving a substitute in a matter of days. Alou didn't really mind one way or another. With a substitute, that meant she could probably get away with so much more than she usually did on a regular basis, though none of the students really noticed. She was very slick in how she operated. With the power of subtle suggestion, she had already begun to shape some of the minds of the more vulnerable, malleable minds in the school. In time, the entire school would belong to her and she could begin her takeover that way. Her plans were coming together very nicely until someone found her transmitter in the school office. She never discovered who, but it didn't really matter. Her cover hadn't yet been blown, so she was still safe (at least for now).
What Alu didn't know was that Dib's girlfriend, Aurora, who was just as nutty as he was, and she had been clued into the strange happenings that occurred at his school. She had slipped in unnoticed and disabled the small transmitter that was hidden underneath the desk in the principal's office, and they had thought Zim had left it. Their ignorance was of no consequence, but Alu had discovered soon that her plans had been foiled again, and by another female human.
Alu was feeling a bit dejected after being defeated, but she didn't let it upset her too terribly much. Besides, she still had the possibility to enact her plan from the broadcasting station should she be hired. But the process of hiring was very lengthy. She would have to be patient. Unlike her fellow brethren she was more than patient. One could say she had the coping abilities of a saint, or the Irken equivalent of one.
A bit peckish, Alu decided to head to the nearest pizza place, order a small one to go and return home to watch the news and see if she could concoct any horrible, disastrous plans from its dire, dreary output. As she was walking, she noticed a strangely familiar face was sitting down at a table with an even more strikingly memorable "dog".
"It's Zim !", she thought to herself, her pulse beginning to quicken and her cheeks beginning to fluoresce.
Instead of ordering the pizza to go, she decided to sit at her idol's table. She was so elated she could hardly speak, yet she had gathered the courage to speak to him.
"It is such an honor to be seated across from you. I have dreamt of this day. I am not worthy to even be speaking to you, but I want to learn from you.
Teach me, almighty Zim !", she said, hoping not to seem too eager.
Zim smiled crookedly and patted her hand.
"You're Invader Alu, aren't you ?", he said, noticing her cheeks fluoresce again.
"Yes, I am. How do you know of me ?", she said, hoping he had heard praise from the Tallest about her.
"When you were sent here, I was informed of your arrival. I had a feeling we would meet sooner or later. I was impressed with your first attempt to subdue the humans. I am wondering what your next plan of action is.", he said, leaning forward to listen to her. She told him of what her next plan was, and hoped it wouldn't be thwarted by the humans.
"I know, they're horrible aren't they ? But we will stop them. I believe uniting forces with me would be in order.", Zim stated, quite seriously. GIR wasn't much paying attention, except for the occasional smile at Rigel. If robots had feelings for one another, Rigel most definitely had a crush on GIR.
"I will try to learn from you, Zim. My lips press on the hand that will most surely crush this empire, my antennae thrill to the command you will give me !", she said, not thinking anything of how foolish she sounded, or that kissing Zim's hand might seem a bit over-the-top. She was deeply enamored of her idol, and joining forces with him couldn't have been a more incredible tribute.
After waiting for about a week, Alu received her call from the radio station. She had already notified Zim of her plan before and he had methods of improving it.
"Radio is only the beginning. Television is far more hypnotic to these filthy creatures and I will handle that end of the plan. Your voice is already a huge asset to you, so I can see no trouble in phase two of your plan.", Zim said, rubbing his hands together greedily.
Chapter 4—Tuned In…Knocked Out ?
Alu had been called back to the broadcasting station and had been welcomed with open arms. She had called Zim, letting him know that soon she would be in. He had outfitted her with one of her transmitters, modified so no one else would notice it. It fit around her neck like a choker, but the signal coming from it was hypnotic. Whatever she said over those radio waves, the listeners would do. It was so deliciously evil, and insidious. Zim wasn't certain of why he hadn't had the pleasure of teaming up with this innovative invader in the past, but he was indeed falling for her.
Zim took care of Operation: Boob Tube. Slowly but surely, he took every station down, and led only one signal to be aired: that of the colored bars and 'busy' signal of a station that was having technical difficulties. Sooner or later, the couch potatoes watching would become so upset that they would do anything to keep themselves entertained. Zim had a special place he would be sending them to. One by one, they would follow his instructions once he aired his own signal to go to the closest landfill for televisions that functioned normally. Of course, the viewers would find nothing there but instead meet the large metal thud of a gargantuan mech house. Long before they could scream, they would be squished. Thinking about it gave him chills. At last, a plan that could actually work.
The broadcast had begun once Alu began to speak. The harmonious quality of her voice was inescapable and even the most impenetrable mind was no match for it, when it was coupled with the hypnotic signature of the transmitter. In a matter of minutes, all that had listened to the broadcast had been transformed into mindless drones that would do whatever Alu said. She was so close to making them follow each other like lemmings from the side of a cliff but Alegra had shut the broadcast off. Her leading paranormal and occult expert, Blithe, had noticed the signature was different to a normal one and had found strange traces coming from it as she watched. She and the others had been unaffected. She then remembered that filthy Dib-human and his girlfriend and grumbled.
"I didn't come all this way simply to be defeated. Prepare for my wrath !", she screamed, pulling a ray gun from a holster in her back pocket. Despite its miniscule size, it packed quite a wallop. Alegra began to sweat. She thought Blithe had been kidding, but now she knew she had been right. She had secretly thought aliens existed but now, she was going to have proof. She snapped a photo quickly, which only lead to her camera being vaporized.
"Any other bright ideas ?", she questioned, as she slowly placed the gun against Alegra's face. Seeing the fear in her eyes gave Alu such a sense of control and power and the others were giving into their panic as well. Yet, Alegra fought back and the two were in a tussle.
"Run, while you still can !", she exclaimed. Blithe, Hope, Juanita, Tabitha and Myrtle ran as fast as their legs could carry them while Alu and Alegra fought tooth and nail.
As they were fighting, wrestling the raygun back and forth, Alegra hit the switch that would cause it to self-destruct.
"Curse you, human…", Alu seethed through clenched teeth. Not thinking of the implications, she yanked Alegra by the hand and was able to protect her from the force of the explosion the gun caused. At that moment, she had a flashback about her former friend, Gen.
"Gen, stay put.", she said, very calmly, as a second explosion occurred. The force of the explosion had caused some of Alu's costume to peel off. At first, Alegra had been skeptical about what Blithe had been telling her, but her beliefs had been confirmed. She didn't understand why Alu's demeanor had changed so quickly. She felt a bit of pain on her cheek where she had been scratched earlier, and felt a tingly salve being applied where the wound was.
"You're going to be alright. I am going for help. Stay there, Gen.", Alu said, as she rushed off. In Alu's mind she was recalling the time she had been part of an invasion to another planet, Bellicosia, in which the Bellicosians were not all that welcome to being invaded by the Irken army. (1) Her best friend, Gen had paired up with her since there was strength in numbers. During a fight with one of the Bellicosian Warlords, Gen had been hurt quite badly and she was dying. Even though Alegra didn't know Alu was reliving her past, she herself had been hurt by the impact of the blast though Alu had tried to save her. It proved that Alu wasn't so bad after all.
Meanwhile, Zim was having more success with his part of the plot than Alu was. But, as she had experienced failure, he was about to experience defeat as well.
While Zim had commanded the humans to march in single file to his base (under the hypnotic trance, they wouldn't notice, let alone care) and GIR and Rigel would man the particle beam that would evaporate them with one single push of a shiny-red button. Rigel had to be careful to keep a close watch on GIR, lest he became distracted and wished to raid Zim's refrigerator before the humans processed up to their lawn.
Suddenly, Zim felt something flat and pointy hit him in the back of the head. He wasn't certain what it was, but it had disabled the signal from being transmitted.
"You ! Why weren't you affected ?", Zim exclaimed seeing Dib with his companion Aurora.
"For a 'superior being', I'm surprised you didn't predict me using this !", Dib said, pointing to his and Aurora's shades and earpieces. Apparently they blocked out any suggestive rays from entering either visually or audibly. Being Professor Membrane's son had been an advantage after all, since Dib dabbled in inventing from time to time. And Aurora wasn't dumb either. She was just as creative and innovative as he was.
"I hate you both.", Zim said, balling his fist and shaking it at them to try to intimidate them. It didn't do any good. Zim didn't have a "Plan B", so he used his spider legs to escape, but he vowed that the next time, he would succeed.
"You may have won this round, Dib-stink…but the next one WILL BE MINE !", he shrieked as he fled into the darkness cackling. Dib scratched his head and Aurora shrugged her shoulders. Zim had lost, but he was still laughing about it. Neither of them would ever understand how the Irken mind functioned.
Afterward…
Though the broadcast station had completely been obliterated, Alu's flare didn't need to be used to attract the attention of the paramedics. They took her away in a gurney, not noticing that her costume was mangled.
"She's a bit mangled, but she'll be alright. She's got a few broken ribs but she will survive.", one of the medics said as she was carried away. Alu sighed happily, but then snapped back into reality.
"What just happened ?", she thought to herself. Her face was slightly damp. Could she have been crying ? She wasn't certain, and she didn't understand what had happened after the initial explosion. After seeing Rigel running to her with a defeated look, she knew that the initial plot she had come up with so elaborately had failed.
"Should we comfort Zim in his loss ?", Rigel questioned. She thought it was the opportune time to do so. Mentally kicking herself for saving Alegra's miserable life, she hailed her own Voot cruiser (by use of a handy "clicker" she carried around on her belt as an accessory) and flew to Zim's house. As soon as the cruiser was disguised as a small bumblebee balloon and tied to one of Zim's 'trees', she rang the doorbell and he graciously allowed her entry.
Chapter 5—"I'll never tell YOU anything, Human"
After being in the hospital for a couple of days, Alegra could return to school but she was still healing from the turmoil she had undergone. Though the substitute teacher, Ms. Falstaff was rather imposing and creepy, the students knew their regular teacher would Mrs. Rachedi would be returning soon, which was a welcome thought.
Alegra wouldn't be able to look at "Lou" in the same way yet again. The same situation of Lou rescuing her and saving her from the possibly dangerous blast was something an unfeeling creature would've never done. She was again, curious about what had caused that, but no matter what she asked Lou, she always got the same response:
"I'll never tell YOU anything, human !"
Though this isn't what Alegra wanted to hear. She later was able to actually get 'Lou' to sit down and talk to them. Lou didn't think anything of allowing Alegra to interview her. After all, she knew if she simply fabricated a tale about her time in Jersey, maybe the reporters would leave her alone.
Lou spoke of her time in Jersey, how she acquired Rigel and how her mom and dad worked different jobs to keep food on the table. As soon as their questions were answered, her friends went their different ways.
"Maybe I was wrong to assume she was an alien.", Blithe said as she departed.
"She seems perfectly normal. I wouldn't worry that much about her. Give up this meaningless Q&A session. It's not going anywhere, and it's boring.", Hope added.
"Absolutely. I have a better scoop in mind. Mystery meat. Trust me, this will be HUGE.", Myrtle said as she left the small room where only Alegra and Lou sat face to face, just staring at each other. After a pregnant pause, Lou finally shouted,
"What ?!"
"Why are you still sitting here ?" , Lou asked after another pause.
"I still have one remaining question. Then I will leave you alone. I won't ask you any further questions afterward.", Alegra said, honestly. Lou gritted her teeth and exhaled with great frustration and contempt.
"Very well, ask your question, Alegra.", she said.
"When you referred to me as Gen, who was she ?", Alegra asked, still unable to shake that imagery from her mind.
"How do you know of Gen ? W-w-what gives you the right to ask me about her ?", Lou questioned, trying not to show any emotions. Yet, her eyes were growing wet again. Alegra felt badly for having asked the question initially.
"I'm sorry. I should just leave that question unanswered. Forget I even asked. I didn't know it would pain you so much.", Alegra said, as she tried to comfort the "girl" who sat across from her. Lou didn't seem to flinch when Alegra tenderly wiped her eyes. She couldn't believe she was allowing her enemy to come that close to her. After a while, Lou unknowingly slapped her hand away and scrambled out the door. Left stumped and befuddled, Alegra pondered, and thought it was better to just leave the question about Gen alone and go about something else entirely. Though her friends would doubt her undeniable truth that Lou was "unique", she wasn't going to be labeled a freak and loser for speaking out the possibility that she could be from another world. Thinking nothing more of her pursuit of this topic she devoted her time to more useful studies, at least for a while.
Epilogue
Though Alu's first plan had been a failure, she had a feeling that the next one would work quite well. Instead of working apart, and separately, Alu knew that there was strength in numbers like in the invasion of Belicosia. She was only just formulating and blue-printing her plot at this time, and the rest of the horrid events to follow would allow her to have access to every known electricity circuit that the monkeys used…
To be continued…
"The Insanity Continues: Trip Into the Darkness". Operation: Blackout is thus far a success, and Alegra has pulled the belief of Blithe back in her corner to confirm Lou is not what she seems. Dib and Aurora join in as well, but the dark makes it difficult for them to fight against the Irkens. Lou's guise is lifted, but of course, there is no actual proof (other than the ever-present ray gun). Who will win the battle this time ?
Bellicosia, from its name is naturally warlike. The Warlords command the planet and their favorite sports are anything that deals with violence and bloodshed. Few Bellicosians have died actually participating in these gory spectacles, but it is all a part of their "pride" in being Bellicosian. When the Irken Gen and Alu were sent to invade, they were outnumbered, though their Voot cruisers proved to be a worthy match against the Bellicosian warships, which were slow and clunky in their movement from too many 'ramming battles' to impress female Belicosians. One of the Warlords hurt Gen quite badly even though she fought with all of her might. He hit her right in the squiggedly spooch, the most vital organ to an Irken. She immediately bled out and died, quite suddenly. Although Alu had called for backup from other invaders and the planet was inevitably invaded (with consequential bloodshed on both sides), medics could do nothing to reanimate Gen even with their incredible technology. Gen was Alu's closest friend, and she so desperately tried to save her life. Alu slightly blames herself for not being able enough to save her friend, but helped conquer a planet despite that traumatic loss.