Hey, guys! So this is my first fan-fiction about Acotar, and I'm kinda of scared because I'm not a native english speaker so If I make some big mistakes don't be so harsh, point them in the review and in this way you could help me improve the story.Another reason it would be that I'm a little scared of what you may think of my writing, I'm not really a Sarah. J. Maas 2.0 so it fricks me a little about the image I have on the characters and this fanfiction could change my vision over characters as well as you own. But hey! Let's be optimistic! (I sound like Mor, didn't I?) Glad you read all of this (if you did) and let's get started!

Feyre

As I walked through the empty hallways, I started to think if the nightmares will ever stop while I am here. Of course, as soon as I waked up from my nightmare were eveyone I love and ever loved (including Tamlin, well that thought make me smile a bit) I hurled up my lunges, and when I tried to get back to sleep, I just couldn't.

The mateing bond I have with Rhys isn't like our bargain, I can't really speak to him, only feel his emotions and as well he could sense mine. Every time I get scared by something I could feel Rhys concert, and almost feel him asking what going on.

I am here for only five days and the nightmares started from the first day. O can consider myself lucky because Tamlin never showed up. I don't know how but exactly after we entered the mansion, he was called by the king of Hybern called he to do some things. Normally, he thinked I was just a gods-damed damsel and kiss me for good-bye, told me he has something to do and winnowed somewhere.

And after that I was left alone with Lucien who thinked I never wanted to go back to this mansion. Well, that was true, but a little, little, little piece of me, screamed that I wanted to go back, why? To kill Tamlin. And now, to spy on him. Even through Lucien wanted to be threatening ( he said something about me in a dungeon cell), all I could think was why was him Elain's mate. Elain was sweet and kind, and well Lucien, was threatening me right then, so I think you got my point.

Although, Lucien made his point for me to not go explore the mansion because they were redecorating. Why would they be redecorating? I guess Tamlin couldn't stop his anger so he started to destroy everthing in his way?

About that, they changed the servants, too. Alis was nowhere to be seen and when I asked someone they were acting like they never heard that name before. Lucien pass me to two servants, two females that I never seen before. The first one was tall and thin, she had brown hair and green eyes, the other one was a little shorter than the first but still taller than me. She had golden hair and blue eyes. Both of them took my hands and forced me to move forward.

After we walked a while on the hallways they stopped before a door. The blonde one opened the door. We entered in a big, spacious room with a bed for two people, the thought of begin with Tamlin made me feel sick, they lived me saying that my old one was to small for the "to be Lady of the Spring Court" and that I should be preparing dinner. Only if they would know that is The High Lady of Night Court they are talking about. I know the true reason they changed the old one but I didn't say it loud. Tamlin should have destroyed in his rampage. They needed to think I was a insecure, broken and idiot female. I've seen their faces, both females were determined and powerfull, something that I didn't seen at the servant of the Spring Court until now. Since Tamlin made a bargain with the king of Hybern then they must be from Hybern.

Since then I couldn't leave the mansion. I felt like a wolf in a cage, and in this case, it was true. No one dared to talk to me, when someone passed by me I could smell their fear. They were afraid, but not by the old me, by what I could have became in the night court. They thinked Rhys turned me into a monster but he put me back together bit by bit. I miss him like hell right now, but I can't do anything, can I?

Right now, I'm heading to the gallery. If I wouldn't know better, I would laugh of the situation I just make, wake up from a nightmare in the middle of the night, go to the bathroom, and in the end heading straight to the gallery. I could explore the mansion, against Lucien wishes. And I really want to explore but not today.

I wondered if anyone from here (without me) ever wake up from a nightmare and just walk around. It would be a little embarrassing to meet someone in the middle of the night.

When I finally reach the gallery I was exhausted. My room was in the opposite part of the masion. I open the door and lock it. Here wasn't no one to hear me, to see me.

After I assured the door was locked and the windows were closed, I situated myself before a painting of a rainbow, I painted it yesterday between breakfast and lunch.

Lucien asked me what this represented and I said it was just a rainbow. Little did he know that this was the rainbow of Velaris.

Velaris.

Right now I miss Velaris so much. I never thinked I could possibly miss something so much. Especially a city. I miss all the colors, the rainbow, the people there. They we're all nice, unlike the people here.

I hate this Court. I hate it more than anything. I hate it more than I hate my mother for putting me take care of my family when she's dead. I hate it more than I hate myself for leaving my mate. Rhys.

Rhys.

Rhysand.

Mate.

My mate.

The mate I leaved.

My mate that I leaved.

Because I'm a damn idiot. A damn idiot that leaved her mate, leaved the single city she loved and gone to the worst place she could ever think of.

I started crying and yelling at myself for what I've done.

I hate myself so much right now. I've been here for 5 days, for Mother's sake, and it almost draw me insane.

I can't even imagine what would happen if Tamlin would have be here and bedded me.

I didn't notice that I keep my mental shields down and Rhys practically feel every emotion I haved experienced in the last hour until I could feel Rhys's panic. He was so panicked that it almost made pass out for a second.

I tried to send some comfort through th bond. Maybe I could have stop his panic, but it didn't make a difference at the moment.

A paper and a pen appeared right in front of me. I could say that the paper appeared right before my eyes, literally.

On the paper was a very familiar write, Rhys writing but also he wrote it in such a rush that his two last words seemd to be write by a child.

Are you okay? What happened?

All that he asked, and somehow I couldn't answer.

I am okay. Sorry for that.

I write after I erased my tears.

Feyre, what happened?

He asked again, this time his writing now was more normal.

I really didn't know what to write.

I stayed like that for two minutes while I could sense Rhys's panic rise again.

I don't deserve you.

That's what I really think right now.

The answer come in almost the same second.

Feyre, you're giving me panic attacks. What. The. Hell. Happened.

I just couldn't tell him that I yelled at myself for what I've done. He would blame it on himself and after that he would get me out of here as soon as posible. I couldn' t stop myself smile at the thought of seeing him again, but if he would do that we will have to deal with a freaking war because of Tamlin undying love for me and... who else could feed us with informations of Hybern actions.

So I write back.

I miss you and Velaris a lot.

After that I waited for like 1 minute before getting the response. What surpise me the most is that it wasn't a just the paper back, but with it it was a little package.

On the paper was write:

I know you won't tell me something, don't ask, I just know. But I don't wanna press you to tell me. Just don't put yourself in situation that could harm you. And don't even think of harming yourself.

I write back immediately:

I'll try.

Now I looked at the package. This one is not from Rhys definitely. He would never put a nametag on a package. How the hell this have got to me. I pull the nametag and read it. It was for Tamlin.

Well at least I know that if he's not here his packages come to me.

I unwrapped the packkage with so much sensibility and grace that I didn't know I haved, and look at the inside. It was a freacking green and white dress. There was a letter too. I slowly opened it and started to read it.

Dear Tamlin,

So, you remember the dress? Its a replica at the one I wore at Calanmai. I assume you don't remember that the other one was reaped to shreds by you. After all you were such feral that even I was scared, the whole court was scared by all the magic we produced that night. Oh, and I know you rescued Feyre just so the other court wouldn't think that you just used her. Well now you could blame all on her that the marriage didn't work out. But I have to ask you when you came home, you know, our kid already missing his father. He's kicking like hell after you leaved. Can't you just move Feyre somewhere where she'll never see the sun and make sure everyone think that she's dead? And you could blame the powers she inherited from the High Lords. You know, the magic drives you insane if you don't use it. It'a war going on Tamlin, and I want you to be safe with me, your mate, and not with a Cursebreaker.

Love, Ianthe.

Well, that complicate everthing.

So, what do you think of the first chapter? I think I maked it to dark and twisty and use the word mansion a lot in the first paragraphs.

So tell me what you think of it and If I should update it.