The Ghost of You

Set between Substitute and Furt btw I don't care what time of year it actually was so just roll with it ;D ALSO IN THIS STORY FINN AND KURT DON'T LIVE TOGETHER

enjoy ~

Kurt tried not to look too thrown when his father announced that they would be spending the next night at the Hudson's house. He had long gotten over his crush on Finn (he had started losing interest the moment the F word left his ex-crushes lips) but he knew that Kurt sleeping over would still make the Frankenteen uncomfortable no matter how hard he tried to remind himself that they were almost brothers and Kurt didn't feel that way anymore. It was all going to be a huge hassle and Kurt wasn't sure he was up for it what with everything that was happening with Karofsky. But he knew what it meant to Burt so he bit his tongue and pretended it was a great idea. He was sure that Finn was at his own house doing the same thing.

To be honest Kurt was really just making excuses; he knew the real reason he didn't want to go to Finn and Carole's house on that particular day.

'Mother's day

Mr Schuester had scribbled that down on his lovely whiteboard on Monday with a huge grin on his face.

"I know that you guys all know that Friday is Mothers' day so this week's assignment is to shower you moms in musical love!" a few laughed at his enthusiasm already thinking up songs. Rachel at first complained about how offensive it was for him to force them all into singing Mother's day songs when she had two gay dads. Mr Schue was just starting to look guilty when Rachel suddenly remembered Shelby and thought up a hundred different songs that expressed her feelings towards her estranged mother and Kurt just sighed.

He was sitting alone again in glee club, everyone too excited and too far away to see his heart break.

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That week Kurt sat through all the songs his friends sang some comical like Finn, Mike and Puck's rendition of "Somebody get my mom" by bowling for soup, a band none of them had heard of, to Rachel's emotional and breath-taking interpretation of 'Cat's in the Cradle' by Harry Chapin.

By the time Thursday came Kurt and Santana were the only ones who hadn't sang, Kurt had said he wasn't ready yet so Santana had taken the mike after everyone sent their own not so discreet worried looks at the counter tenor.

Santana had blown them away with a song sung entirely in Spanish and while no one fully understood it (except Schue) they all knew how much it meant to her as she sat down and linked pinkies with Britney.

Kurt was soon in the backs of everybody's minds.

The countertenor had barely shut his locker at the end of the day when Finn snuck up on him

"Hey, dude" Naturally the pale boy jumped a mile before turning around and slapping his almost brother with surprising strength on his arm

"What the hell, Finn, can't you wait for the person to see before talking to them like a normal person!"

"Er, Sorry?" Finn backed away slightly

"What exactly do you want anyway?" Kurt asked softer this time now that his breathing was under control

"Well, you're like sleeping over at my house tonight, right? I was just wondering if you wanted a ride since I noticed that you walked to school this morning . . ." Finn trailed of noticing his almost brother's eyes dart around the almost deserted hallway "Eh, are you okay?"

"Just surprised you'd mention the fact that I'm sleeping over in public" Kurt muttered without thinking, he didn't notice the hurt and guilty look that crossed Finn's face, he was still busy looking around

"Okay, let's go then, we'll have to stop at my house to get my stuff though" he said finally and Finn smiled, driving Kurt to his house was totally a big brother thing to do, right?

Finn was so lost in his happy daze that he didn't even notice Kurt had already started walking and was a good bit ahead of him. He was about to start jogging to catch up with the surprisingly fast fashionista when a flash of red came out of nowhere and slammed Kurt's delicate frame against the row of lockers, Finn winced at the loud bang it made and his eyes hardened as Kurt slid to the floor from the force of the push.

"Hey, you!" he shouted, stomping away the distance between himself and the attacker

"Oh look, it seems your boyfriend's come to save ya, fairy" snarled the boy, who Finn now recognised as Karofsky. The fear in Kurt's wide eyes was enough to propel Finn forward with Hulk like strength until he had Karofsky right up against the lockers opposite the ones Kurt had been slammed into.

"Leave him, he's not worth it" Kurt said haughtily, just as Finn was about to punch Dave. Kurt knew that the difference between hitting someone and slamming them into a locker at this school.

". . . Fine" he relented after a pause, letting Karofsky go roughly as the bully glared at him.

"Come on" Kurt sighed, almost resting a comforting arm on Finn's elbow before thinking better of it and just walking ahead, letting his almost brother fall into step beside him and ignoring the troubled look being sent his way.

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It was ridiculous. Kurt knew it was ridiculous but he couldn't help himself. He shouldn't have kept it a secret, if he'd told his dad and Carole they would have understood. There was no need for him to get up at five in the morning and walk to the graveyard. Ironically enough the Hudsons actually lived closer to where she was buried than the Hummels did.

He shivered for the umpteenth time, he was wearing a coat, but it was fashionable not practical.

He always did the same thing every Mother's day; he would wear one of his nicest outfits, and then proceed to knell on the damp soil surrounding his mother's grave. It was one of the only things he was willing to ruin an amazing ensemble for.

Today was no different.

"Hi, Mom" he spoke softly as I afraid to wake the dead, arranging flowers artfully around her tombstone. He used to feel sort of silly for talking to a rock, after all he didn't believe in the afterlife but it made him feel closer to her so he didn't question it "Happy Mother's day. I still love you, I know you might not want to listen to me complain on your special day but. . . I really miss you, so much is just going wrong in my life right now. Karofsky, the bully I was telling you about . . . he- he kissed me and I feel like he's stalking me. And I love Carole and everything but she's not my mom. . . I just wish I could turn off life for a while and just live in a fairy world filled with fabulous clothes and musicals" he ended with a laugh, vaguely realising that he was crying "I met this guy, Blaine and he's smart and funny and actually gayand even though he's way out of my league I think I'll still see if I can get my first boyfriend by the end of the year" he continued talking like that to his Mother before a timer he'd set on his phone went off telling him to get home before anyone woke up to find him missing.

"Bye, Mum I love you"

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Luckily no one was awake when Kurt got back so he balled up the note explaining where he was and threw it in the bin. Yawning and heading to the fridge to make some breakfast for everyone when he remembered it wasn't his home and so not his place to go snooping around the fridge, he wondered if he should go back to bed. He decided that he probably should and turned around to walk out of the kitchen. And promptly knocked over a rack of pots that should have been nailed to the wall and Kurt swore on his Gucci sunglasses that he would murder Finn Hudson because the slim boy was certain it was Frankenteen who was meant to nail the rack to the wall. But he didn't and the rack fell to the ground with a series of loud bangs that froze Kurt in place.

"Do you normally get up this early?" Was all that Finn had to say when he walked in to see Kurt looking frenzied as he picked up all the pots, almost fainting when he realised that one of them had a dent

"What are you doing?" Burt asked with humour in his eyes and Carole by his side

"Oh my Gaga, Carole I am so sorry, I swear I wasn't trying to mess up your kitchen but I just came to make breakfast like I normally do when I realised that this isn't my house and it would be rude to just take your food so I decided to go back to bed but I bumped into the rack and now it's dented!" Kurt explained hurriedly holding the dented pot up for Carole to see "I'm really sorry, I'll pay for a new one"

Carole was shocked silent for a few seconds before slapping Burt on the arm "You make your son cook for you, he's not a servant!"

"He likes cooking" Burt defended

"Wow, that's like the most emotion you've shown in weeks" Finn commented

Kurt scowled at this

"Yes, he does tend to get pretty emotional today" Burt added softly looking down at Kurt's knees (that had mud patched on them clear as day) he sighed

"Hey, Kurt what happened to your jeans, they're all muddy" Finn exclaimed, following Burt's gaze

The countertenor averted his gaze "I just. . . I went to my Mom's grave"

"Oh Kurt honey!" Carole exclaimed "You didn't have to get up early and go alone, we all would have gone with you"

"I didn't want to take away from your day" Kurt said and it was only partly a lie because really he had wanted to go alone and one reason was to not take away attention from Carole.

"Oh, you're so sweet" she ginned and hugged him "Now both of you go get dressed and ready for school, breakfast will be ready when you get down"

Kurt opened his mouth

"Don't worry, nothing too fatty, or salty I'll be damned if I'm the one to give your father another heart attack!"

Kurt smiled and did as he was told. He really di love Carole. But she still wasn't his Mom.

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"Okay guys, Kurt's the only one left so you're up!" Schue beamed as Kurt stood and gave out his sheet music to the band. Some of them raised their eyebrows and others grinned, either way they all knew the song, for which Kurt was glad, after all it wasn't exactly rehearsed, but with the new directions that was pretty normal. He gave them a few minutes to tune their instruments before one of the guitarists gave him a thumbs up and he nodded

"This is for my Mom" he smiled sadly and the band began to play a tune unfamiliar to most of the gleeks

"I never

Said I'd lie in wait forever

If I died

We'd be together

I can't always just forget her

But he could try"

Kurt thought about how his dad had found new love with Carole and as happy as he was for his father (he was the one that set them up!) he couldn't help but feel that his mother was being replaced

"At the end of the world

Or the last thing I see

You are never coming home, never coming home

Could I? Should I?"

Everyone was shocked at the raw emotion in their resident gay's voice. Mr Schuester wondered vaguely if they could use this in a competition, Rachel should be able to sing it . . .

"And all the things that you never ever told me

And all the smiles that are ever ever

Ever get the feeling that you're never all alone?

And I remember now

At the top of my lungs in my arms she dies

She dies"

Kurt remembered the day as if it were only yesterday. His mother had squeezed his hand one last time before giving away her last breath. It was the first time he'd ever seen his dad cry

"At the end of the world

Or the last thing I see

You are never coming home, never coming home

Could I? Should I?

And all the things that you never ever told me

And all the smiles that are ever gonna haunt me

Never coming home, never coming home

Could I? Should I?"

Tears threatened to spill from most of the girls, and Mr Schuester's eyes. It was clear what he meant. Kurt didn't believe in God or heaven, he didn't believe that he'd ever see his mother again

"And all the wounds that are ever gonna scar me

For all the ghosts that are never gonna catch me

If I fall

If I fall

(Down)"

Kurt was surprised when have the band and also a few Gleeks sand the Down part for him, but that observation was made in the back is mind, the rest of him too overwhelmed with emotion. 'If all of this finally gets to me, If I finally break, who's going to pick up the pieces?' Kurt thought while singing his heart out

"At the end of the world

Or the last thing I see

You are never coming home, never coming home

Never coming home, never coming home

And all the things that you never ever told me

And all the smiles that are ever gonna haunt me

Never coming home, never coming home

Could I? Should I?

And all the wounds that are ever gonna scar me

For all the ghosts that are never gonna"

The music faded out as Kurt tried to regain his breath

"So..." he started, hating the way his voice cracked "What did you guys think?"

His answer was a surprise group hug and Kurt could have sworn he saw Puck tear up a bit.

"We all love you, you know that right?" Mercedes, who was closest to him said and Kurt smiled

"Yes" 'No'