My Immortal- Azu Edition!
A/N: After looking at many spoofs of the epic Harry Potter fic, "My Immortal" I decided to do this. Enjoy. It also references some other bad stories, soup for you if you find them.
You'll have to read My Immortal to understand this. Seriously, read it or you'll have no clue what the hell I'm talking about.
DISCLAIMER: THIS IS NOT MEANT TO BE SERIOUS. IF YOU SAY "THIS IS BADLY WRITTEN" OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT IN A REVIEW, YOU'RE NOT USING YOUR NOODLE.
DISCLAIMER 2: THIS STORY IS NOT AGAINST GOTHS. I LIKE GOTHS. IT'S JUST FUNNY HOW THEY ARE PORTREYED IN MY IMMORTAL.
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Chiyo Mihama walked cheerfully to her classroom. However, her cheery demeanor was soon sucked away by a newcomer. She was wearing all black, a My Chemical Romance shirt, fishnets, and a few pounds of makeup. She stared at Chiyo with a haunting gaze.
"Who… are you?" Chiyo asked.
"I am Ebony/Enoby Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way! I'm not related to Gerard Way, but I wish I was cuz he's so fuckin sexy!!!!112"
Chiyo looked at this girl with a confused look, "Who's Gerard Way?"
Ebony gasped, "omg, u don't know who Gerard way is? u fuckin poser!!!!!!!!!!!!1"
Chiyo sweatdropped, "Poser?"
Suddenly, Masaaki Ohyama walked by, not paying attention to Chiyo or Ebony.
"he's so fuckin hawt! I have like an erection but it's not really because I'm a girl you sicko" Ebony said.
Chiyo was creeped out by this girl, so she ran away. She entered Yukari's classroom and saw a horrifying sight.
A gothic Osaka.
She was dressed like Ebony, except with a Slipknot T-shirt and less makeup.
"Chiyo, ur so fuckin hot." Osaka said.
Chiyo cried out. "Osaka-San, what are you saying?"
"don't be such a fuckin prep, Chiyo-chan." Osaka angrily said.
Chiyo backed away slowly, until she bumped into someone. "Oh, I'm so sor- OH MY GOD!"
Standing in front of Chiyo was a grim-looking Sakaki.
Chiyo and grim Sakaki had a stare down.
"… Satan." Sakaki said.
Chiyo, now traumatized, covered her eyes. She fell to the ground in a fetal position.
"Hi Chiyo!"
Chiyo looked up and found a pale, gothic Tomo.
"Chiyo, I am a wild cat, but I am also a Satanist!"
Chiyo darted from the room and into the bathroom. She locked herself in a stall. When she looked up, she saw… Kimura peeping, masticating (A/N: Yes, masticating. It is a joke from My Immortal. I am fully aware that is not the proper term.)
"Kimura-Sensei, why are you masticating?" Chiyo inquired. Usually she'd be afraid that Kimura was in the girls bathroom, but at least he wasn't goth.
Kimura's jaw hung open. He stared into space for a moment and left the room without a word.
Chiyo, after regaining her composure, left the bathroom and went to the classroom, where she saw that everyone was goth, and this "Ebony" girl was in the class. Kaorin and Sakaki were strangely missing.
"chiyo, where were you, you motherfucker????!!!!!!11111Q" Yukari… asked.
Chiyo hesitated, "Um… Hiding."
"You ludicrous fool!" Yukari yelled.
Chiyo cautiously made her way to her seat. Minamo Kurosawa entered the room, wearing a shirt that said Good Charolette (A/N: Yes I know they aren't gothic. Once again, a joke. Just don't take this seriously.) She was holding Sakaki and Kaorin by their shirt collars.
"Where were these two?" Yukari asked.
"They were having sex in the forbidden forest." Minamo said.
Forbidden Forest? Chiyo silently questioned.
"Oh my Satan!" Yukari yelled.
"They are stupid motherfuckers and OW MY HEAD HURTS!" Minamo yelled. She ran from the classroom. Sakaki and Kaorin stood awkwardly by the doorway. Yukari motioned for them to go to their seats and Yukari continued her lesson on Satan.
All of a sudden, Chiyo-Chichi jumped through the window, holding a gun. He ran over to Chiyo.
"Chiyo, thou must kill Vampire Yukari!" Chiyo-Chichi said in a British accent.
Chiyo's eye twitched. Chiyo-Chichi fell on the ground and began tothrash around, appearing to have a seizure. When it stopped, he floated up and looked at Chiyo intensely.
"Chiyo…" He began, "You are the demons."
Chiyo screamed. The setting changed and she was back in her dark bedroom. She looked around and grabbed her phone, then dialed Osaka's number.
"Hello?" Osaka sleepily answered.
"Osaka-San, did everyone turn into mall-goths, or was I just having a bad dream?" Chiyo asked.
"The latter. G'night Chiyo-Chan." And she hung up.
Chiyo breathed a sigh of relief and went back to sleep.
What a crazy dream.
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A/N: Ah, the effects of a tired mind. It's what caused me to write this. If you haven't read My Immortal, then you are probably confused. I have it under my favorites, so check it out. It's hilarious.