DesertsHide the Secret we call Love

by JetStar-Jr1

This is a story about Frerard...the love that was always meant to be. It's filled with twists and turns, even if its a little slow to begin with. I hope you all enjoy it :D

Deserts...Hide the Secret we call Love

"Fun Ghoul," someone whispered. "Fun Ghoul, wake up!" I groaned, it was too early to be awake, but I turned over reluctantly. "Good, you're awake." It was Party Poison, his red hair sticking to his dirty face. "What is it Party, what do you see?" "Nothing Fun, I wanted to talk to you about something." We only ever called each other Fun, and Party, when we were alone. I'm not sure why, but we did. It might be because I've known him for so long. It might also be because I love him, but thats a different issue. He's been my best friend since I was twelve years old. We're both 18 now. "Go ahead, but we better not wake Jet-Star or Kobra, they need their sleep." "Yeah, I know." He stared into my eyes, his own a beautiful hazel. "Do you miss life, well normal life, at all Fun? I do. I'd do anything to be at home." "Me to. I want to sleep in my own bed and eat some real food." "Yeah, the food sucks and we've been sleeping rough. Not that you sleep very well anyway. Oh and by the way, start eating 're getting too thin Fun." I nodded my head, "Sorry Party." "Hey, at least we have one thing Fun, we have each other." My heart lept in my chest. Did he mean what I think he did? "What do you mean?" "I mean, there's the four of us. Me, you, Jet-Star and Kobra. We aren't alone Fun." I nodded, he would never mean what I wanted him to. "I also mean, I've got you...WE'VE got eachother. You're my best friend, if I lost you then..." "Don't talk that way Party. Don't dare say I'd leave you. I'm not going anywhere, anytime soon." Party smiled, then reached out, hand touching my shoulder. I looked over at him, our eyes locking together. I looked away, but then turned back. Weirdly, he was still looking at me. "Party...are you okay?" "Yes Fun, I'm just fine." "Good. I'm gonna try and get some sleep. We got another day ahead." I lay back down, wrapping the grubby blanket around me. It was the only source of warmth I had. I closed my eyes, but then opened them again...one last look at Party. He edged over to me and wrapped his arms around me. I snuggled in close, expecting him to push me away. He didn't, he actually held me tighter. I enjoyed being held, and the warmth that came with it. I closed my eyes again and I swear I heard him say; "Count to 17 and close your eyes, I'll keep you safe tonight, Fun."

When I woke up, Party was still there. His arms still wrapped around me. I moved carefully out of his hold, deciding I needed food. The only thing we had were Power Pups. A disgusting mixture of meat and vegetables. That was also a strange sludgy brown colour. It might as well have been dog food. Actually it is dog food. The first time it was mentioned, I wouldn't eat it. The thought of eating dog food...no fucking way. The first time we tried it, Kobra was sick. Then again, Jet-Star wrestled him to the ground, and forced a spoon into his mouth. We eventually got used to it, no matter how utterly hideous it was. I grumbled as I attempted to open the can. Jet- Star must have heard, because he asked, "What's for breakfast?" "You're seriously asking this? It's the usual shit...Power Pups. Your daily source of sludge." Jet-Star chuckled, shaking his head. Kobra rolled over, kicking Party in the process. "Are we eating?" "Yeah, but its not alot." "It never is," Kobra replied. "I'm guessing it's Power Pups?" I nodded, causing him to pull a face. "Who kicked me?" Party asked, sounding pretty pissed off. "Me," Kobra said, his eyes narrowing. Party jumped up, looking his brother in the eyes. There had been a strong form of tension between them for a few days now. "Party Poison!" I shouted, "Cool it...he didn't mean it." I looked over at him desperately. His face softened into a smile. "Sorry Fun Ghoul. Sorry Kobra." He ran a hand through his hair, and asked "Well, what's for breakfast?" Kobra laughed, and said "Our daily source of sludge." Party looked puzzled, whilst Kobra winked at me.

After eating a really shitty breakfast, I decided to head for the mailbox. The kid that we'd rescued, showed me where it was. Sadly she was long gone. Her name was Grace. Like all of the other Killjoys, she went under a different name. Her Killjoy name was The Missile Kid. Her group had been killed a long time ago. They'd died with masks on, as every Killjoy wishes for. Each of us have our masks to. Party's, is a strange, animal like head. If you remeber Sonic the Hedgehog, then first of all...well done, that game was fucking awesome. Secondly, thats what it looks like. Jet-Stars is a helmet, kind of like an astronauts. Kobra's is an really big motorbike helmet. He coloured it in, and wrote Good Luck on the visor. Mine...was a halloween mask. I'd gotten it when I was thirteen, loved it ever since. I felt hidden, and invisable. Grace, was a good kid, I'd enjoyed taking care of her. She called me the brother she never had. I missed her lots and lots. The mailbox was one of the only things on the outskirts of Battery City. Well, that, us and the occaisonal dead tree. Party decided that he wanted to come with me. I was nervous about that, but didn't object. "What have you got for the box Fun?" According to Grace, the box took letters and sent them to the people you loved. "Nothing, Party. I like to read the mesages, and I fancied a walk." Party smiled at me, his face looking so beautiful. "I wonder who wrote all the messages." "Grace said it was for the loved ones." "Loved ones?" "Yeah, people who miss their loved ones, write the messages...in hope they get read." "Maybe its ghosts. All the people who got ghosted, might leave a message." Party could be very creative when he wanted to be. I laughed a little at that thought, causing Party to smile again. "Have you ever felt un-loved Fun?" "What do you mean?" "Have you ever felt like you were unlovable, or that no-one wanted you?" "Once...but it was a long time ago. Why?" I wanted to explain to him that one time. The one time I felt unloved was when he told me we wouldn't work. He'd broken my heart with very few words. "I have. I felt it when my Grandma died. I feel it now being stuck out here." "You're not unloved Party. I'm sure Kobra loves you. Even if there is tension between you two." "Aww, I love him to. Even if he does annoy the shit out of me." I sighed, and looked at him. If he only knew the way I felt about him. "What is it Fun? Something wrong?" "No Party, I'm fine." He put an arm around my shoulder, hugging me tight.

"What are you doing Party?" "Trying to hug you, but I guess you don't know how to anymore." I looked back to the old days. When we spent afternoons in his basement, hugging and being the strange teenagers we were. We were "emo", well what was emo at the time. All you used to have to have, was a side fringe, and skinny jeans. Who am I kidding, thats all it takes these days. We were the best of friends, and if we're honest, we loved eachother. We listened to the same sort of music, mainly Bring Me the Horizon, Misfits and other smaller bands. We wrote songs together to...which is where all our emotion and anger came out. Gerard had been the best at it. I remeber all the times we spent curled up together, talking about the future. The future that at the moment, didn't seem as though it was going to happen. Basically BL/Ind had taken over much of the world. BL/Ind stood for Better Living Industry...we had not yet experienced the better living. Towns were in ruins, and there was nothing we could do about it. Families had been torn apart, loved ones had been ruthlessly murdered. My own family were still living. Luckily for us, BL/Ind were loosing the fight. They were loosing the power, and we were part of the revolution. I loved this fact. I also loved Party, with all of my heart. I hoped he knew it. I turned to face him, his expression a sweet little smirk. I put my arms out towards him, and stepped forward. Party flung his arms around me, pressing me against him. I gently hugged him back, my fingers gripping his jacket. When he let go, he asked "Do you love me Fun Ghoul?" "What in like a brotherly way or...?" "Anyway, a brother or more." "Yes, I love you Party. You're my best friend, and you know it." "Good, I love you to Fun. But more than a best friend, if you get my drift." Had he said what I thought this time. To me, it sounded like it. Like he finally said that he loved me. I was confused. "Thanks Party, I think." Party took my hand in his, and kissed each of my knuckles. "I'm glad you love me Fun. I'd be badly upset it you didn't. That would mean I only had Kobra." I laughed again, realising I hadn't in ages. Party laughed to. We decided not to go the mailbox and instead walked back to the others...hand in hand.

When we got closer, I took my hand out of Party's. I wasn't ashamed, I just didn't want them to make assumptions. Party looked hurt, so I whispered, "I'll make up for it later." He nodded, and turned on the radio. It was the usual crap, so I decided to take a nap. I was woken up, by the frantic nudging of Jet-Star. "Fun Ghoul. Listen!" "We are still wanting to know the whereabouts of the following outlaws," the guy on the radio told us. "Jet-Star, The Kobra Kid, Fun Ghoul and their leader Party Poison. If anyone knows where they are...turn them in." That was the good thing about livng in the desert. Our hide out was hidden and we could keep moving. Oh and other than us, the only people out here, were the people from BL/Ind, and all the other Killjoys. BL/Ind had domintated the place we now called Battery City, and alot of the world, they the ones who were searching for us. The Killjoys, us, and a few other, were the rebels. Kobra interupted the silence, with a laugh. "I love how everyone knows us," he said. "Its like we're famous in the city." "We are Kobra," Jet-Star replied, "But for all the wrong reasons." "Jet-Stars right Kobra," I said, "If we're so famous, it's gonna be easier to hunt us down." Party had been silent for a while. "No-one is going to be hunted down Fun Ghoul. We're sticking together, and if we have to, we'll keep running." Kobra grinned and hi-fived his brother. "If we're staying together, we need more food," Jet-Star informed us. "I'll take the car and get more," Party replied, "Who's coming with me?" Jet-Star shook his head, "Can't. Need to repair our guns, got the spare parts. Take Kobra." Kobra shook his head to, "I'll stay and help Jet-Star. You go Fun Ghoul." I nodded briefly, wandering to the car. "Wait," I shouted, "Isn't the fuse going?" "Yeah, but you can hot wire, can't you." Party looked hopefully at me. "Yeah, I can," I replied, lifting the bonnet. I asked Kobra for an empty bullet case, and a stick of gum. He handed them over, and I chewed the gum. Nom...strawberry flavour. I stuck the wire together with part of it, slotting the bullet case over them. "There, that should do it." Party grinned, "You never cease to amaze me Fun Ghoul." I smiled, and climbed in, no need for seatbelts in the desert.

"Fun, did you even want to come with me?" "Of course I did." "It's just the guys kinda forced it onto you." "No, its fine Party, I promise." He still looked unsure. A look of "your lying" on his face. It was awkward, so I turned on the radio. Some random song came on, and I just so happened to sing along. "You're good, you know Fun." "Thanks Party. I don't sing very often, but never mind." "You should sing more often Fun...please." He pouted at me, and it made my heart melt. "Okay Party, I will." So I sang another song, just to keep him happy. We parked at the hideout, which was also an old gas station. Party went inside, off to get more Power Pups. I went straight to the gun machine. If I did this right, I could get some gun parts for Jet-Star. I did do it right, and had gotten three new triggers and two new bullet chambers. When we got back I tossed them at him. "Where did you get them from?" "I hot wired the gun machine and got some spare parts." "Cool. How do you do it Fun Ghoul?" "Baring in mind I stole and crashed a motorbike, at age twelve. I fixed it myself to." For the record, I'd been in trouble with the law for alot of my life. Since I was twelve onwards. I'd spent thirty weeks altogether in overnight stays in a cell. I knew nearly all the police officers back in Jersey by their first name. I was one fuck of an idiot. "Oh cool. Did your dad teach you?" "Nah, I taught me." He laughed and went back to work. Kobra was lying on the ground, snoring softly. "So much for helping," Jet-Star said, "He's been like that since you left." I laughed, "He's a lazy shit man." Jet-Star shook his head, chuckling. "Yeah, but he's a nice lazy shit." Party was the, without reason, leader of our group. Jet-Star was our technician guy. He knew how to fix every weapon, tend to every wound, and was our agony aunt. I was the chef, sort of. I was also the fighter, the one who was ahead of himself. Kobra was the lazy one, however he was always there when we needed him.

I went and sat next to Party, who was staring at a map of Battery City. "What are you planning Party Poison?" "Nothing. I'm trying to figure out where the BL/Ind headquarters are." "I'll help you if you like." He nodded, smiling briefly. We studied that map for what seemed like ages. "There," he shouted, triumphantly punching the air. "It's got to be this one," his finger on a random but obvious building. From where it was on the map, it looked like the radio broadcasting studio. That had obvuiously gone to rack and ruin. BL/Ind felt music was a bad thing. Music, created feelings, feelings created trouble...troiuble was bad for everyone. However music was the only thing that got many of us through the days. Dr Death Defy, was the guy who ran a private station, just for us Killjoys. He was missing three fingers, however...that wasn't really improtant."What do you think Fun Ghoul?" "Could be," I answered with a high-five. "We gotta celebrate," he laughed. "Celebrate what?" Kobra mumbled. "I've...no wait, we've, found the BL/Ind main office." "Oh good. We'll attack them some other day." "There isn't gonna be an attack. All we have to do is track them. You have your tracking device kit, right Fun Ghoul?" I nodded, "Yes. Of course I do." "Right, I'll bug them the next time they're around. It's my job." I shook my head, horiffied, "No Party Poison. I'm going to do it." "Why? I'm the leader." "I know you are. Thats why at least if I'm caught, these two have you." "Yes, but what about Grace?" I scowled, she was my weak spot. BL/Ind had found us about an month ago. They didn't kill us, however they did wound Kobra. Putting him out of action for three weeks. They took Grace instead. I swore revenge on them, but poison doesn't last long in my heart. I'd never forgive them for taking her away from me. She'd been like a daughter, never mind a sister. I missed her so much "What about her?" "She'd want you to stay safe." "I know. But I'm still doing it." Party sighed, brushing hair out of his eyes. "Okay. But you better not get caught. If you do, I'll feel guilty...and you know it." I smirked, but hid it carefully. "You can count on me Party Poison. I promise." "I better be able to," he muttered.

"I'm going to the mailbox," I told them. It was the only place I only went. I didn't go to get away from them, just to have thinking time. Jet-Star looked up, nodding. He turned on the radio, head bobbing to the song. Kobra mumbled, then curled up in a ball, trying to sleep. Party stood up, "Mind if I come with you?" "You don't have to," I whispered blushing. "I want to," he replied, with a grin. We walked in an odd silence at first...but it was normal for us. "Earlier, when you said you'd make it up to me," Party began, "What did you mean?" I slipped my hand into his. Party smiled, squeezing it in response. "Good, that's sort of what I wanted." "Well what else could you want from me Party?" He stopped me, putting his hands on my waist. I pulled me towards him, pressing his lips to mine. I opened my mouth, his tongue slipping in, as I kissed him back. I ran my fingers through his hair, my fingers getting tangled. I was the first to pull away, his hands still at my waist. "I love you Fun," he whispered softly. "I love you to Party." "You do?" "Yes, I always have." "I thought you didn't care," he said, tears in his eyes. "I do care. Of course I care, how could I not?" A tear fell down his cheek. I wiped it away, with gloved fingers. He rested his face in my hand, sighing. "Fun are we any further forward?" "What do you mean?" "I didn't know where we stood." "What with?" "With us. I didn't know if there was an us. There's been so many times, where I've thought we were. Then we haven't been. I feel like I've led you on. I do love you Fun. You know that right? I always have. I was remebering the old days. The days when we used to sit in my basement, just us. All the times we'd lie together and talk about the future. Our future. I want us to have a future Fun Ghoul. I really do. I thought we did back then. I didn't know it was gonna be this way. Then you met Jamie. It broke my heart Fun. It really did...and I know you miss him. I can see it in your eyes, when you speak, when you laugh. That recognisable sadness inside them. I know you miss him, but all I want is a chance. I chance to love you properly. Please Fun...it's my only hope."

I felt the tears spring to life. I sobbed softly. "Oh Party. I love you to. I know you love me. I remeber the old days to. I always hoped we'd be together, but it never happened. I slipped away from you for two whole years. I didn't know what it did to you. Kobra told me...don't be mad at him. It was a strange twist of fate we're together again. I miss Jamie, of course I do. But my sadness isn't because of him. Its because of you. The fact that you hurt yourself. It hurt me that you couldn't tell me. I love you Party Poison. I want to take this chance. I want to love you to." "You haven't seen my scars...have you?" I shook my head, and he frowned. "Its okay then. I just wanted to check. I hated myself for such a long time. I felt like I'd lost you. I couldn't cope. I tried to let go of it all...but I couldn't. Kobra told me about you, kept me updated. Then you came back to me. We had our afternoon again. I thought we'd make it...but you left again. Jamie took my place and I knew it." "GERARD!" I was screaming at him. I saw him flinch. It had been such a long time since any of us, had heard our real names. "Don't you fucking dare say that. I never let him take your place...never! You think it was easy to walk away from you?! Away from New Jersey!? I hated it Party! I couldn't cope, I missed you so much! I was so glad to spend that day with you! I wanted to stay with you forever! You don't think it was hard for me? Because it was. My heart broke when I left. Then you'd be so selfish to try and kill yourself! Of course Kobra told you about me, he was so freaking worried! He cried on the phone everyday! I felt so helpless! I always do Party. I never know what to do around you. You've had so many mood swings. I've always been there for you. The one who got the shitty end of everything. I was so scared of you at times like that. I didn't know if you'd hit more or not. So don't you dare say I replaced you Party...because I never could." I was sobbing hard now, and I wasn't gonna stop. Party groaned, and pulled me towards him. I let him hug me and kiss me. "Oh Fun. I'm so sorry. I'm so so sorry. I'm so stupid. Please don't cry." I just managed to stop my tears, he'd hurt me this time. Pretty deep.

He interupted my thoughts by asking "Fun, are we actually going to the mailbox, or not." "Yes, let's go before the sun goes down." If you stay in the desert for too long, you'll go missing. No-one knows where, but you'll go missing. We both knew that, but never spoke about it. Party held me close, and I giggled at him. When we did get there, I read the messages. "Hey, look at this one. It's got our motto written in it. It says: If you're alone or lost in this world, always remeber Keep Running!" "Whoa, you're right. That's weird. Do you think that someone else was stuck out here, like us?" "Maybe," I replied, "That might be why the hide out was there. Who-ever it was could have built it. Knowing it would be used again." "Hmm, never thought about it that way before." Party was very creative, but sometimes failed to see the bigger picture. After a little longer, we decided to go back. He still held my hand, and he'd always hold my heart. I wanted to test his creativity. "What does this cloud look like?" I asked, pointing into the sky. "A cloud," he giggled. "You lie. It looks like a skull." "No. It looks like a cloud." I shook my head, and said "What about that one?" "That actually looks like something. It looks like a heart." He was right, it did. I laughed as he drew it in the air. "Look after this fragile heart of mine Fun." I smiled, "It's in safe hands." He nodded, and kissed me again. "Nearly back Fun. I'll cook tonight." "No, it's fine. I can do it." "You always do it, so its my turn." "Okay. What are we having." "Power Pups," he sighed. I sighed to...they were so gross. We just got back before sundown. Kobra and Jet-Star were playing cards. I remebered putting them in the glove box. "Where have you been?" Kobra asked. "We went to the mailbox, like we said," Party replied. "Yeah, but you took for ever." "It don't matter, at least we came back." Jet-Star nodded. "I'm cooking," Party told them, "Fun Ghoul needs a day off. Don't you." I laughed and went to sit with Kobra. Kobra just glanced at me, and asked "What ever the hell you're doing, keep doing. I mean he hasn't ben this happy in such a long time. Keep doing whatever you're doing." I chuckled, and agreed woth Kobra.

I played cards with them for a little while. I was pretty suckish at it actually, they both easily beat me. After a "hearty" meal, Party joined us properly. We talked about our old lives for a little while. Kobra talked about sleeping, and eating. The fact he had hated working in Barnes and Nobles. I mean it was really sucky, but he was lucky. Most of the time, I'd never get a job. It was probably because I was covered in tattoos. From my neck, to the bottom of my back. People didn't really like them, but I do. Party does to. Jet-Star was more serious, talking about his family. In his soft Peurta Rican voice, he said "I miss my family. I miss my boyfriend." "Boyfriend?!" Party looked confused. "Yes...my boyfriend, Robert." "Ummm Jet-Star...I thought you were straight." He laughed a little bit, "No. I'm bi-sexual. I miss Robert. I love him." "Awwww!" Jet-Star blushed and laughed a little bit. After a little more talk, we all played cards. Me and Party against Kobra and Jet-Star. They beat us pretty easily, as we weren't very good. We talked some more, until I rembered something. I ran to the car, and got my guitar. I'd had her since I was ten. Pansy and me, together for life. I had been writing a song, and wanted the guys to hear it. She was the only posession I'd brought with me. "Pansy?" Kobra asked, "You been writing?" I nodded, "How'd you tell?" "You only ever get Pansy out, when you've been writing. So come on Fun Ghoul. Give us some tuneage." I laughed, and struck a few chords. "Right now, I hope you're ready for a firefight. 'Cause the devil's got your number tonight(They say!) "We're never leaving this place alive" But if you sing these words, we'll never die. Get off the ledge and drop the knife. Not a victim of a victim's life, because this ain't a room full suicides. We're believers, I believe tonight...We can leave this world, leave it all behind. We can steal this car if your folks don't mind. We can live forever if you've got the time. Na na na na na, na na na na na. If you save yourself tonight. Na na na na na, na na na na na. If you save yourself tonight!" They all looked proud of me, especially Party. Kobra and Jet-Star clapped, and said "Truly brilliant bro." I grinned at them. Party said nothing, and I was slightly confused. After a little while they both fell asleep, leaving me and Party awake. He cuddled up to me, pulling me onto his lap. I kissed him softly, and he rolled over, both of us lying in the sand. I felt his hands trace my chest, down to my pants. His hand slid over my crotch. "Party..." I whispered. "Not here, not now." "Why?" "We might wake them up. "You really think they'd just go...Oh, okay?" cos I don't." "When though Fun?" "Soon...I promise soon." Party smiled and, pulled me closer. He pulled the rest of the blankets around us. Keeping me warm, the best he could. I held him tightly, and kissed him. "You know that song?" "Which one?" "The one you wrote. Was it for me?" "Yes. It was baby. I want to leave the world behind, and just be us." "I love you." "I love you to." I drifted off and could only think of Party.

When we woke up...we were no longer in the desert. We were in a solid, concrete room. The two of us, the same way we'd been last night. I panicked, and nudged him. "Party!" He rolled over, and looked startled. "Where the fuck are we?" "I don't know," I whimpered. "We've been kidnapped," he groaned. I started crying. Party was usually stern when in a situation, but he stopped. He held me tightly in his arms, and kissed me. I smiled through my tears. "What are they gonna do to us?" "I don't know baby, I don't know. We'll just have to wait." "What if they seperate us?" "I won't let them Fun, I promise." There was a sudden thud, and the door opened. Party gripped me tighter, as the person entered the room. "Where's my brother? Where's Jet-Star? What are you doing to them? Why are-" He was cut short as the man slapped him. I growled and sprung upwards. I held this guy by the throat, holding him against the wall. "Never...hit him...again," I warned him. He coughed, and I let him down. "You're strong," he told me. "You'd make a good soldier here." "I'd never work for you scum." He slapped me this time, drawing blood from my lip. "Fun," Party gasped. "I'm fine Party." The guy laughed, "Still strong." "Now, what happened to the other two?" I was managing to make him talk. "They're here." "What are you doing to them?" "Nothing. Not now. Torture has taken place. They would not talk." "Where are we, and what's gonna happen to us?" "You are in the BL/Ind prison. Nothing will happen, if you co-operate." I nodded, "What are you wanting to know?" "Why you will not pass over to us?" "It's against our nature," Party told him. "We refuse to be part of a system. Its wrong. Free will is the future." This guy nodded, "But it is easier if you follow us. Then none of this will happen." Party shook his head. "You have a choice. Become a part of this, or don't and be sent elsewhere." "What happened to Grace?" I screamed at him. "Did you send her elsewhere huh?" "She was disposed off. She was no use. Other than keeping the master alive...she was no use. She was a brat. We made sure we killed her with her mask off." I screamed angrily, and punched him. He staggered backwards, falling into the door. I kicked him where he lay. It took all of Party's strength to haul me off him. The guy left, muttering to him. "God Fun, I didn't think you had it in you." "He hit you, and talked badly about Gracie. I'm not putting up with that shit. I don't have to." I sighed, as he gently dabbed my bleeding lip. "I think you went too far Fun. I mean, you punched him." "I know. I know, it was wrong. But I'm not gonna stand back and let him hurt you, or me for that matter." Party smiled, "So you did it for me?" "Yes, of course. I'd do anything for you." We curled back up together, trying to block the noise out.

More days passed, and when I say more, I mean alot more. We don't know how long we were in there for, but it seemed like a life time. It wasn't until day five of us being there that things started to look up for us. There was seventeen other cells in this building, all of them filled with Killjoys, like us. When they'd herded us outside for some form of air, we'd spoken to them. However, the only ones we never saw were Kobra and Jet-Star. I hated the fact that we didn't even know if they were alive. However, the twenty of us that were outside, talked of escape. Escape and revolution. BL/Ind were in control, but they weren't smart. They'd left us with the two things we needed; our masks and our guns. Our masks were always worn, unless Party decided to kiss me. Which was often, as he needed the comfort. The other KIlljoys had created a pretty decent plan for us to escape. There were twenty guards, one for each cell, three extra for security reasons, and for watching over us the yard. As they'd left us with our guns technically all we had to do was kill them. Once we'd killed the guards, our next problem was Norse. Norse was the man who had created BL/Ind. The man who was responsible for all the shit that had been caused. The man who had promised so much, taken lives from too many, and had given too little back. However Norse also had eight guards with him at all times. Our plan was, kill the guards in our cells, then at the main desk. As a team we'd head upstairs, killing the eight guards and finally Norse. This was the only way we could think of. It was crazy, we all knew that, but we had to try. It all started with cell one. Once the door was shut to that cell, that meant that the rest of us were due a visit. Party was going to be the one to kill him, whilst I distracted him. Soon enough, he appeared. As usual he was weary of me, and stayed away. He as per usual talked about us becoming part of this...it wasn't gonna happen. I distracted him, by asking, "So, what happened to your family." He began to explain, "My wife and kids were killed. I miss..." Before he finished the scentence, he was dead. He landed face down, with a thud. We heard the noise of the other Killjoys running upstairs. The rule was, cells 1-10 were to go upstairs. We were in cell 12. I looked at Party, then to the body, then to Party again. "He's dead," I whispered. I turned him over, and closed his eyes. We put the body in the hall, with the rest of them. I kissed Party, lifting up his mask. "We did it," I whispered. "Yes, we did," he smiled. Tomorrow, we'd escape...tonight we would sleep.

Me and Party were awoken to the door opening again, the light shining on us. It was Jet-Star, Kobra standing behind him. "Oh My God!" Party yelled. "You're alive." "Yes, yes we are!" Kobra grinned at him. "Come on then? We're getting out of here." Jet-Star told us. "Where are we gonna go?" "Dr D's outside, there's a hole in our cell wall." "Really?" "Yeah...he drove into the wall." "I love Dr D right now," I laughed. "Come on. We gotta go. Now!" We all followed Jet-Star, staying quiet. Like they'd said, there was a huge hole in the wall. Dr D was sitting with our car, motor running. We all dived out and into the car. "You guys alright?" "Yeah. We're fine...now." Party told him. I sat in the back with Jet-Star and Kobra. Dr D drove like a madman. Until the lights of the city were completely out of sight, I didn't breath. "God Dr," I smiled. "I don't half love you at the minute." Dr D laughed, and glanced at me. "What the hell happened to you boy?" "I got slapped by a guard for arguing. I did punch him the face though." "That takes fucking guts Fun Ghoul. I'm proud of you." I nodded, "Thanks sir." Party smiled at me to, turning around. "We're free Fun Ghoul. Freaking free." I grinned back. I almost leaned in for a kiss, but decided not to. Jet-Star and Kobra were smiling at us both. "So guys, is there something you wanna tell us?" Kobra asked. "What do you mean?" "We know, Party Poison." "You know what?" "We know that Fun Ghoul's your boyfriend." "How long have you known that?" "Since like a week ago." "It was pretty obvious," Jet-Star told us. We giggled, and blushed at each other. "So wait," Dr D said. "You two are homosexuals?" "Yeah," we laughed, "Basically yeah." "Good for you. Do whatever makes you happy boys." I smiled to myself, "So where are we going Dr D?" "We're going home," he informed us. "Home?!" "Yep, back to Jersey. I've made contact with your families. Everybodys safe. No harm done." "Define everybody?" Jet-Star asked. "Fun Ghoul's dad, brother and boyfriend Jamie. Kobra's girlfriend Alicia, his best friends Jonesy, Carson and Theo. Party and Kobra's parents Donna and Donald. You're parents, and Robert." "Roberts alright?" "Yep, he's fine." Jet-Star grinned, tears streaming down his face. "You okay?" "Yes. He is alive. I thought he would be dead." Dr D smiled, "Glad I brought good news for you all." I sighed. "Except you though, huh?" "No...it's not that it's just." "Jamie don't know you two are together right?" "That's right Dr D. I can't bear to break his heart." "Then don't Fun. I'll wait for you." "Party...no. I'm not letting go of you, not again. I lost you once. I refuse to do it again. I'll tell Jamie. He might of known that we'd get closer after all this. I have to tell him." Fun smile," he told at me, and turned back to the windscreen.

We arrived in New Jersey after midnight. Everyone was waiting for us, and my eyes widened. They all looked so different. Even though I knew them all, they seemed like strangers. Jamie stood, his face like ice. I got out of the car and wandered towards him. "Jamie?" I whispered. "You left me. You left me and went off to the desert...so you could be with your red haired slut over there." I frowned, "Don't you fucking dare say that about Party." "I'll say what I like! Don't say you don't know what I'm talking about. He's fucked everyone in town Frankie." "Don't fucking call me Frankie...you called me that when you loved me. It's obvious you stopped caring when I left." "I never stopped caring. I knew you'd come back with the slut though. It's obvious he'll have turned you against me. Made you think you love him." "I DO LOVE HIM!" "Why?" "Because I know him better than you. I love him and always have!" There was a hushed silence, and Kobra stepped forwards. "I think you better leave now Jamie." "Fine...I don't need you Frank. I have Damion ." "You 're leaving me...for me ex? What the fuck is wrong with you? Don't you know what he's like?" "Yes. He's funny, kind, cute and completely perfect...something you couldn't be!" I stared at him, and my eyes filled with tears. "I'm sorry I can't be fucking perfect Jamie!" I ran off, and Party caught me in his arms. "You are perfect," he whispered and kissed my forehead. He let me go, going to see his parents. I smiled through my tears and watched everyone else. Jet-Star was holding his boyfriend tightly; kissing him and telling him he loved him. Party was with his parents, hugging them. Kobra was with Alicia, Jonsey, Carson and Theo. My dad smiled at me, and Gavin ran towards me. He squished me against him and said "You twat! We've been so worried!" "Calm down Gavin. I've missed you to." My dad put out his hand, and I shook it. "You've done us proud Franklin. Very proud. Me and your mom." I smiled at that. Dad never had forgotten mom, even though she left us. Inside, deep down, we all loved her dearly. I never ever wanted to loose my memory of her...she'd been perfect. Me and Party, left our families. He looked at me through tear glazed eyes. "Hello beautiful," I whispered. Party smiled, and held out a hand. I took it and kissed his hand. "We're starting over...aren't we?" he asked nervously. "Don't think of it is a new beginning. Think of it as doing things right. Doing things the way we should off." He smiled again, "So do I have to do the awkward flirting with you?" "Yep. But we start again tomorrow. I'll see you in HMV?" "Yep, in the heavy metal section. The way it started. The way it always started. The way its meant to be."

A New Beggining...Means a New Chance

We started our new beggining, the way we'd promised we would. I went to HMV, and looked through the cds. I was in my BMTH phase and was looking for the bargains. I felt a tap on my shoulder. I turned around and stared at this "stranger." Dressed in black skinny jeans, a black t-shirt and leather jacket, was the most beautiful human I've ever seen. His eyes were this perfect hazel, and his hair was a dyed red colour. His skin was softly pale, and his smile...wow. I still however looked at this "stranger" confusedly. "Can I help you?" He smiled again. "Umm...yes. I'm looking for something." "I don't work here." "Oh...shame. I was hoping you'd help." "I probably still can. What are you looking for?" "My Chemical Romance, The Black Parade. I've been searching for it for a while." "I'm sure they'll have a copy." I smiled, and nibbled my lip nervously. "Are you alright?" and he touched my arm. "Yes, I'm fine. I'll help you look." "I think I've found what I'm looking for actually." I giggled softly, and he blushed. "What's your name?" "My name?" "Yes," "My name's Franklin. Please don't call me that though." "I won't. I'm Gerard." "Nice name." He shrugged, "I guess so. Can I interest you in a coffee?" "I don't take drinks from strangers." He smirked, "I'm no longer a stranger. You know my name." "That's true. I'll take you up on that offer." Gerard smiled, and we wandered out into the morning sunshine. "Too early for you?" he asked. "No. I like a little bit of sunshine." "Good," followed by a smile. I smiled too, this "stranger" was a nice one. In the end we ended up in a little cafe. The same cafe he'd brought me to, when we were twelve. "What can I get you boys?" the waitress asked. "I'd like a black coffee," he told her. She looked at me, "Ummm just a coffee please." "Milk and sugar?" "Please." She nodded and went off. "So, how's your day going?" he asked. "It's going quite nicely. There's this guy, I've seen." "Oh...awesome." The waitress brought out coffees. We sipped them silently. Gerard leaned forward and stared into my eyes. "Hello," I chuckled. "Hello," he smiled. "I'm sorry," he told me suddenly. "I'm going to have to go." "Ohh, okay. Here's the money for this." He shook his head. "No need. I'll pay. I'd like to see you again. If you don't mind that is." "Of course not." "How about tonight? At seven. If you meet me back here?" "I'd like that." "So would I." "I'll see you tonight then Gerard." "Yes...you will," he smiled. Wow...what a nice dude. I mean come on, a) he bought my a coffee...which is like the best gift ever. B) he was going to take me out for dinner later on today...which seemd pretty fucking awesome. C) he was beautiful...in a manly sorta way.

I dressed nicely for Gerard. Wearing a decent shirt and unripped jeans. I still wore my checky vans...wasn't going anywhere without them. I waited for him outside of the cafe, the wind chilling me. I shivered, until I felt hands on my shoulders. I jumped, and Gerard laughed. "Hello again." "You scared me," I whined. "I'm sorry about that. You look freezing...are you?" "Yeah I should've worn a coat, but I don't think of these things." "Here, take mine." "No, you'll get cold." "I don't mind, I'd rather you stayed warm." I shook my head, and he just shrugged. "So where would you like to go for dinner." "Umm, anywhere." "How does Gino's sound?" "Sounds good, I'd like that." Gerard smiled, and we began to walk. "You look nice tonight Franklin." "Thank you," then I cringed. "What's wrong?" "You called me Franklin." "Oh, sorry. Is Frank alright?" "Frank, Frankie. I have one friend that calls me Fran." "I'll call you Frank." "Thank you, I hate the name Franklin." "I think it's cute." I giggled, "Kinda." I smiled at him, and he smiled to. Everything felt so right. Once inside Gino's, he loosened up. "Do you mind playing a game?" "No, not at all." "Cool, it's a questions game." It was the same game we'd played the first time. "Okay." "May I ask you first?" "Sure." "When did you realise that you were gay?" "When I was about thirteen. Well actually, I'm bi-sexual." "Okay. Who was your first guy crush?" "An old friend of mine." I couldn't say him, even though it was. "Now for a weirder question, what would your porn star name be?" "Little Franklin, the Destroyer. I may be small...but, yeah you get the point." He chuckled when I told him this. "What do you want on your tombstone?" "I don't wanna be buried, I wanna be cremated. *I want to be cremated, then put into sandboxes all over the globe." "Oh, so like children can play with you forever?" "What?! No! God no." Gearard started laughing, really loudly. "Stop that," I giggled. "Family?" "My brother and my dad." "Cool. You ask me now?" "Sure." "You gotta ask the same questions though." "Alright. When did you find out you were gay?" "When I was eleven and kissed a friend of mine." "Young. Who was you're first guy crush?" "An old friend of mine." It had been me, and that's why we'd gotten so close. "If you were a pornstar, what would your name be?" "The Sass Master." I smiled. "What do you want on your tombstone?" "Same as you, I wanna be cremated. **But I wann be like sprinkled into pepper pots. And some of me, has to be thrown in the ocean." "So you can be a mermaid?" "Exactly." "Family?" "My brother, my mom and my dad." I nodded politely. By the time we'd eaten and payed, it was ten o, clock. "It's late," he told me. "I don't want this night to end Frank." "Neither do I Gerard. I wish I could stay longer, but I gotta get a bus." "I'll get it with you." "Are you sure?" "Yes, I want to make sure you get home safely." "That's sweet Gerard." Gerard blushed and offered out a hand. I took it, holding it tightly. We didn't say a word, we didn't need to. I felt like this time...things were gonna work out just fine. (*Stolen from Kellin Quinn. **Stolen from Justin Hills)

The dreams began. After BL/Ind's take over, the world was still in ruins. BL/Ind may have lost the power, but we were the ones who had to clear up all the damge. Like I said, the dreams had began. They were bad to start off with, but now that it was over, they seemed to have gotten worse. "Running. Keep running!" Party called. I ran. I didn't look back, but I kept running. We eventually pulled into the hideout. It was too late for Jet-Star and Kobra. We had lost them, and I could see that Party would never forgive him self. Tears were streaked down both our faces. I looked into his eyes, and our hands found eachother. We kissed each other, in a soft passionate moment. We held each other tightly, and whispered that we loved eachother. The door was smashed, and the peices of it flew everywhere. Guards filled our hideout. Party stood up, and I quickly followed. Our masks were back on. Our guns were loaded. Both of us looked into the eyes of our enimies. Party stopped, wrapped his arms around me, and held me. I knew that this was it. I couldn't believe, I didn't want to believe it. They closed in on us, as we held eachother tightly. Party's grip was loosening on me, as they hauled him away. "PARTY!" I screamed loudly. "PARTY NO!" "Make him watch!" one of the guards shouted. Someone's arms held me, a hand over my mouth. They held Party just metres away from me. One guard, put a gun against his chin. "Say goodbye," he laughed. The trigger was pulled, and they dropped him to the ground." "PARTY!" I cried out loud. I was shivering and shaking. Tears were streaming down my face. I sat sobbing in the darkness, and safeness of my room. I had his number, and even though we'd promised I had to mention it.

Me: Party?

Gerard: Frank...please don't.

Me: I have to tell you something, but it has to be as Party Poison. Please.

Gerard: Okay. What is it Fun?

Me: The dreams Party. The dreams have started,

Gerard: How bad was it?

Me: They killed you Party. They made me watch you die.

Gerard: Its okay Fun. I'm still alive. Don't worry about anything. We're both safe now.

Me: I know. I'm sorry Party.

Gerard: Don't be. Goodnight Fun Ghoul.

Me: Goodnight Party Poison. Signing off.

Gerard: Signing off.

I was getting ready for college. As we'd all enroled, trying to get jobs. I dressed in my casuals again. Ripped green jeans and a misfits long sleeved tee. My van went onto my feet to. I loved them so much. I wandered out my door, shouting goodbye to Gavin. I thought he'd ignored me but I was wrong. He came running after me, and hugged me tight. "See you soon right?" "Yes. I'm not going anywhere anytime soon." He smiled and nodded. I went on my way, listening to a some music. I'd expected a day of learning, but this was a weird college. It was almost like high school. Jocks and cheerleaders. The arty types and the geeks. I did not want to go through High School again. However its where I come to get to know Gerard better. I have to do this. It was at lunchtime he found me. "Frank?" he asked. "Gerard," I smiled at him. "Hi. I didn't know you went here." "I do, well as off today." "Oh cool. You doing anything now?" "No, of course not, why?" "I was wondering if you wanted to join me in the art room. I'm working on something, and you look slightly lost." "I am," I confessed. "So, you coming with me?" "Yes please." I went after him and he led me through the crowded corridors. The art room was quiet, only a few others in. A girl with every peircing possible. A guy with bright green and red hair and another girl, wearing bunny ears. I smiled...these were my type of people. Different, artistic, unique. I wasn't artisitc, or unique but I was different. Gerard smiled and guestered for me to join him. It seemed he was working on a rose. However it as unlike any, I've ever seen before. It was beautiful, it twisted, it was entwined with ivy, it was the darkest shade of red I'd ever seen. It was so perfect. He watched me as I took it in, and he smiled. The most perfect, heartbreaking, beautiful smile ever. Gerard blushed and we sat in a soft silence. Not because we had nothing to say, but because the silence said it all.

I was watching the t.v with Gavin, when my phone rang. "Hey," I said, a little confused. "Hi Frank," Gerard said. "Oh, hi Gerard." "Hi," he sounded nervous. "Are you alright?" "Ummm, yeah." "Are you sure?" "Yeah. I was umm, wondering if...you wanted to come over." "Yeah. I'd like that." "Now?" "Yes, if you like." "I'd like that. Umm, I'll come and get you." "Are you sure?" "Yes, I'll be a few minutes." "Okay. I'll see you then." "Bye Frank." "Bye Gerard." Because all of our families knew about our fresh start, they'd promised to play along. "Who was that?" Gavin asked. "That was Gerard." "Gerard?" "A friend. He invited me over to his house." "Oh, awesome. You gonna go?" "Yeah I am. I think I like him." "That's a good thing...right?" "Yeah. A very good thing." "So, what time you going out?" "He's coming to get me. He'll be here soon." "Can I meet him?" "Yeah, of course you can." "Gotta play my role as big bro." I laughed. For the record, yes, Gavin is my big brother. "Is he attractive to you?" "I think he's cute," I confessed. "Cool." My brother was very good at small talk. However he couldn't have in depth coversations about love, or feelings or stuff like that. He has his girfried, Samantha. When asked about her, he replies in grunts or head movements. We waited for Gerard to turn up. There was a knock at our door, and I went to get it. It was raining outside and his clothes stuck to him. "Hi," he said waving. "Hello Gerard. You're absolutely soaked. You need to get dry." "No point, we're going in a minute anyways." Gavin stood behind me. "Hey. You must be Gerard?" "Yeah, that's me." "Awesome. Well have fun little bro. Don't bother coming home if you don't want to." I stepped out into the rain, and Gerard smiled. I held his hand, and we ran back to his place.

Once inside his house, we started to dry off. Another guy joined us. "Hey Gee, didn't know you were having a friend over." "Yeah, this is Frank." I smiled and the kid stuck out a hand. I shook it politely. "Mikey," he told me. "I'm Mikey. So Gee, do mom and dad know?" "About what?" "About your friend." "No, you really think they'll mind?" "Probably not no." Gerard smiled and turned to me. "You fancy a trip to the basement?" "Please." "Good. I hoped you would." I followed him down the steps. The light fading, until we were in pitch blackness. "Gerard?" I whispered, I couldn't see where he was. "I'm here. Gimme me a minute." The room sprung to life. Fairy lights of all different colours shone around the room. It was beautiful. His walls were covered in art work and posters. I breathed in slowly, scared it would ruin everything. "Gerard," I breathed out. "This is amazing. It's so amazing." "You like it?" "I love it. It's insane, it's mis-matched, it's so awesome." He lay on the floor. I looked down at him, with a puzzled expression. "Come lie down," he said patting the floor. I did as he asked, and lay next to him. "What do you see?" "I see stars, and planets." He'd painted the entire milky way on his ceiling. I marvelled in its presence.. "Are you doing anything tomorrow night Frank?" "No, why?" "Just because it's umm...my birthday. I was kinda hoping you'd like to do something." "I'd love that Gerard." "What would you want to do?" "It's your birthday, you decide." "Would you come to the nature reserve with me?" "Nature reserve?" "Yes. There's a beautiful clearing. It's filled with flowers, and its the perfect place." "For what?" "You'll see." "Okay. I need to get you a present then." "No...you don't." "I do. I can't not get you a gift for your birthday." "I don't mind. I don't really want anything." "Then I'll just have to surprise you." He pulled a face, then nodded. His hand moved, and gently touched mine. His fingers entwined with mine. This time I knew it was going to be right. This time...we stood a chance.

College went slowly, but lunchtime had been interesting. I'd went out last night and got Gerard a few presents. I wasn't not going to get him a gift. It was his birthday after all. I went and found him in the art room. I sat down opposite him, and he looked startled when he saw me. "Hi." "Hey," I smiled. I stood up, and so did he. "Happy Birthday Gerard," I said, presenting a bag. "Thank you. I told you not to bother though." "So? I wanted to get you a present and thats what I did." He laughed and shook his head. "Thank you, again." I did something unexpected next. I brought him closer and hugged him tight. He tensed slightly, then relaxed. His arms snaked around me and squeezed me tight. I let go, "Go on then open your presents." Gerard sat down and pulled one out of the bag. He opened it, and tears filled his eyes. "Where did you get this?" "I did some late night shopping." "Oh my god Frank. Thank you so much." I'd bought him a Misfits t-shirt. He said they brought back good memories for him. "Do you like it?" "I love it. Its perfect." The next one made him giggle a little bit. I'd bought him the whole twilight series of books. "I'll read them soon," he chuckled. "I need you to be team Edward Gerard." Gerard laughed again, "I'm sure I will be." The final gift was just a guesture. I'd bought him a little bear, holding a heart. Gerard hugged me again, "Thank you. Its made my day." I grinned, I'm glad you like them." "I love them Frank." "Can I see your art work?" Oh...sure." The rose was almost finished. Its leaves were now lined with beautiful green threads and looked so beautiful. "Wowser, its amazing." He blushed and took it back. "Lunchtimes, almost over," he whispered. "Yes it is," I sighed sadly. "I'd like to see you again tonight. Can I?" "Yes." "Thank you. I'll come and pick you up." I smiled, "Okay." I turned to leave. "Oh and Frank!" he called after me. "Yeah?" He mouthed something. I smiled at him, and my heart turned a somersault. He'd mouthed "I love you," at me. And I loved him to...

Gerard had decided to come and pick me up, to take me to this clearing thingy. I was nervous, due to the fact I didn't know where I was going. I liked Gerard, like really liked him. He was so sweet, and he appeared to like me. Gerard had just told me that he loved me, and I hoped he meant it. I dressed up nicely, wearing ripped jeans, my un-ripped ones were in the wash, and a shirt. Gerard arrived in the pouring rain, which always seemed to happen when he come over. "Hey," he laughs softly. "Hi, Happy Birthday again." "Thank you, can I come in?" "Yes, of course you can." Gavin was out, and my dad was at work. Gerard asked, "Can I see your room please?" "Yes, if you like." "I would, can we spend the night in there. The clearings no good in the rain." "That's okay. We can spend it in there, if you really want. My dad's on the night shift. Gavin's at his girlfriend. We're going to be on our own." "That's okay," he whispered softly. He followed me upstairs into my room. It was a little messy, so I quickly shoved some stuff under my bed. Gerard chuckled, and turned down my dimmer switch. It was near enough pitch black. I could just make out his figure. "Gerard?" I whispered into the darkness. "Shh," he whispered from in front of me. "Gerard, what are doing?" I asked him softly. I felt has hands find my waist, and he pulled me in towards him. I rested my head on his chest, and he swayed with me. He stopped suddenly, and tilted my head back, I felt his lips press against mine, oh, so softly. "Gerard," I gasped breathlessly. I kissed him this time, and he kissed me eagerly. He pulled me backwards, and we stumbled onto my bed. His hands roamed, to my ass. "Gerard," I mumbled. "Yes," he breathed. "No. Not now, not yet." He nodded, and kept his hands above my hips. I relaxed into his hands, and he kissed me more. "Gerard, stop." "No, I can't," he whispered against my lips. "Please, I want to do something." He reluctanty stopped, then I wrapped my arms around his neck, pressing my lips tightly against his. We kissed that way for another ten minutes, until he stopped. "Can we cuddle?" he asked randomly. "Yes," I smiled at him. He hugged my waist, stroking my hair. I'm pretty sure we fell alseep that way.

"Frankie..." "Fraaankie..." "FRANKIE!" I jumped, and fell off the bed. "Ouchie," I grumbled, as I rubbed the back of my head. "Oh, sorry sweetie," Gerard smiled softly, and held out a hand. I grasped it, and he pulled me onto the bed again. "Hello," he whispered. "Hello Gerard. Why did you wake me?" "We're going to be late for work Frankie." I struggled upwards, and went to my wardrobe. "Do you need clothes?" I asked. "Ummm, just a clean pair of boxers, and a t-shirt please." I rumaged around, and pulled out a grey sweater for myself, two pairs of boxers and found my batman t-shirt. "Here," I smiled tossing the clothes at him. "Thanks Frank," he chuckled, pulling them off his head. "Welcome," I smiled. Gerard looked at me, with a soft smile on his face. I tugged on my sweater,. The sleeves were just that little bit too long, and I hid my hands in them. "Don't strech your jumper you spud." "But my handsies are cold." "Awww, poor baby," he chuckled. "I am, its not nice." "I'll go get ready in the bathroom, be back in a minute." I sat on my bed, and tied my shoes. They were my favourite pair, of scuffed Vans. Gerard returned, looking really cute in my Batman t-shirt. "Hey again," he smiled. "Hi. Did you say we were getting a job?" "We have jobs. When we got home, I got us both waiting jobs. Its not baf, it pays plenty money...so yeah." "Oh, Gerard." "No bother." Gavin was sleeping on the sofa, and I prodded him gently. "No," he groaned, wriggling. "Gavin, I'm going to work. I'll see you later." "Okay, whatever. Hi Gerard." "Hi Gavin." We headed outside, and he kead me to Starbucks. Magically it was my favourite place in the world. We were both maning the tills, and I was looking forward to it. A girl came in around noon. Gerard served her, and I could see the look in his eyes. It wasn't until the end of our day, that we talked about it. "I saw that girl you liked," I smiled half heartedly. "I never said I liked her." "I know, but you seemed like you did." "Baby, don't be so insecure. I love you Frankie." "I know Gerard, I love you to." "I will admit, she was pretty. She was very nice. She was called Lyn-Z." "Oh, that's lovely." "Frankie, come on please sound a little happier." "How can I you idiot? For all I know you could be falling for her!" "I'm not though baby, I promise." I sighed heavily, and he hugged me tight. "Please cheer up baby...pretty please?" "Yes, I promise." "I love you baby." I just nodded, this wasn't going to last.

A few months pass. Lyn-z becomes more and more of a frequent figure in Gerard's life. I can't help but be jealous. She's pretty, I'm not. She's smart, I'm not. She's funny, I'm not. They hang around together alot, but apparently he still has time for me. I guess he has, considering he's always at my house. Lyn-z is to though...which pisses me off. I know he loves me, and I love him...but this wasn't part of the plan. He was never meant to fall in love with her. I guess I can't stop love from happening, but fuck I wish I could. It's ripping my insides out to see him with her. It makes me cry when I think about them being together. Kissing eachother. Loving eachother. I don't want to loose the love I've come to know. I'm a selfish fucker, I know, but don't I have my rights to happiness? Gerard's with me at this moment, holding my hand, telling me he loves me. "So, how is Lyn-Z?" "She's fine," he smiles. "When's the next time you two are out?" "Not until Sunday. She wants to go to some county fair." "Oh, sounds nice," I say moodily. "Frank. Come on, what's wrong?" "I guess I'm just jealous, cos you like someone new." "Frank, I don't like her that way man." "Gerard, I'm sick of the lying, I know you love her." He stared into my eyes, almost into my soul. "Okay Frank. You want me to say it? I fucking well will. I do love Lyn-Z yes. Of course I do. She's pretty, funny, smart and everything I'd look for in a girl. I really like her, and I think I'm falling for her. I can't help the way I feel about her. I've tried to feel differently about her, but I can't. I'm sorry Frankie." "What are you going to do about it though?" " "What do you mean?" "Well are you going to leave me?" "For Lyn-Z...yes. I'm sorry Frankie. I can't not do this. I feel she's my shot at a life long partner. I love you, and I have for a long time. I always will have a place in my heart for you." I started to cry, I sobbbed and sobbed and sobbed. Gerard held me tightly, and shushed me. "Frank, please don't. This is breaking my heart babe." Bad move Gerard, calling me babe. I cried harder, shaking in his arms. Gerard left when I'd forced myself to stop. We don't talk. He doesn't text. I don't text. He doesn't call. I don't call. My life falls apart, and his is only just beginning. I turn to drink and drugs. Self harm and suicide. Its one fuck of a slippery slope to...

Three years pass. I've managed to come away from the drugs and the drink. I can't ever come away from the self harm and suicide though. There's still alot of pain in my heart, I think there always will be. I have alot of poison in there to. I've never gotten over Gerard, but I have heard from him. Him and Lyn-Z are getting married...today. Fucking married. I'm going to be his best man. I have to stand there and watch the man I love the most...marry someone else. I have to stand and give a speech for him, wishing him every happiness. I can't fucking stand myself. I'm such a two faced bastard. I hate myself, and what I've become. I'm in the hotel with him now. He looks so beautiful, and I smile as he gives me a twirl. "You look great Gee," I smiled. "Thank you Frankie." It's been a while since I've heard him say that to me. I can't tie a tie, and he chuckles at my attempt. "Come here," he laughs, and straightens it up for me. I close my eyes, to stop the tears from flowing. "Are you alright Frankie?" "Yeah, I'm fine Gee," my voice wavers a little bit. "I'm just happy for you. That you finally found happiness with the woman of your dreams." "Thank you." His hands are still on my tie, gently stroking it. "Gerard, you can let go now." He shakes his head, and steps back. "There we go, thats better right?" "Yeah, it looks right now." "Good," he grins softly. "You don't have a flower, " he frowns at me. "I don't like them, you know that." "Yeah, but come on, I want my groom dudes, to look the same." I sigh, and nod. Gerard picks up a rose, and puts it in the lapel of my suit jacket. I can feel his minty breath, as he breaths softly, concentrating. I close my eyes, and kiss him. He kisses me to...I feel his hands push me away. However his lips linger at my own. I push him away instead, saying "Oh shit Gerard, I'm so sorry." "It's okay Frank. It's okay. One of us had to do it sooner or later." "What do you mean?" "Always gonna love you Frankie...always." "Then why are you doing this to me Gerard?" "I have to marry Lyn-Z, she's my one shot at normal life." "So the life that we'd had wasn't normal enough for you? Is that it?" "Frank...I can't explain this to you, okay? I'm really sorry, but I have to go through with this wedding." I sighed, an nodded. "I know, I know. I'll stand by your side, and watch you marry her." "Thank you Frankie, your blessing is all I ever wanted." I nodded, and looked at the clock. "We better get down there." "Shit, you're right." Before we leave, I kiss him again. "I had to...because they sure as hell aren't gonna be saying; "You may now kiss the groom." Are they?" Gerard's eyes were filled with tears, and I shook my head. "No...come on. No crying. Smile...you're getting married today." Gerard smiled, and even though it hurt, I did to.

I stand there, like an idiot for the entire ceremony. "Does anyone have any legal reasons why these two should not be wed?" The one question I want to answer, but I bite my tongue...keeping my mouth shut. My reason wasn't even legal...it was selfish. They say their vows, and I sigh heavily, God, I need a cigarrette. "I now pro-nounce you man and wife. You may now kiss the bride." I watch, as Gerard presses his lips to hers. I watch as he pulls away, and mouths I love you at her. I hate him. I hate her. I hate myself. I'm in a pit of despair...and I hate it. People start going outside...I just blend in and follow. I find a cosy spot, away from everyone else. I light up a ciggarette and inhale deeply. God, that felt alot better. Mikey appeared, hovering around me. "Hey," he smiled softly. "Hey Mikey, come sit down." He shook his head, "Come and see Gerard. He's worried about you." "Isn't he to busy with Lyn-Z. Stupid name." "Frank, shut up. He loves her. In the same way he loved you." "Whatever." "Frank, I mean it. Get up, and get your ass over there." Mikey barely ever shouts, and now he was shouting at me. "Okay," I grumbled. "Sorry Mikey." Mikey half smiled, and led me to where Gerard stood. Lyn-Z was with her parents, babbling away. "Frank!" "Sup?" "Where the hell have you been?" "I was having a ciggie." "I thought I'd told you to stay away from those cancer sticks." "You're not my husband Gerard...don't tell me what to do." I could see the anger, and hurt flash in his eyes. Lyn-Z came back over, and she smiled. I smiled to, not wanting to make a scene. "Franklin," she grinned more, hugging me tightly. "It's good to see you Frank." "You to Lyn-Z. Congratulations on your marriage." "Thank you Frank. I'm so glad you could be here today. I don't think Gee would have got married without you being here." I chuckled softly, shaking my head. "I'm ummm, gonna go up to my room," I told them. "Why? Everything's just started." "I know, but I've got a headache. I'll come down later." "Okay," she said, looking a little worried. I waved the three of them off, and headed back inside. This was all to sickly sweet for my liking. I wandered through the hotel, until I eventually found my room. I opened the door, wearily, locking it behind me. I flopped down onto the bed, staring at the ceiling. I just lay there, and started singing a song. "If there's a place that I could be, then I;d be another memory. Can I be the only hope for you? Because you're the only hope for me. And if we can't find where we beling, we'll have to end it on our own. Face all the pain and take it on, because the only hope for me is you alone." It had been awhile since I'd sang those words. That was the song on the radio, that day in the desert. If only we were still that way. In love, but too afraid to do anything about it. I cried a little, and my eyeliner was a mess all over my face. I was just clearing it up, when there was a knock on the door. Who it was, was the person I'd hoped it wasn't.

"Gerard stood in the doorway to my room. I stood in it to...not letting him inside. "Frank, come on...let me in." "How long have you been standing there for?" "Ten minutes." "So you heard me singing?" "Yes," he smiled. I sighed and let him in. "What do you want Gee?" "I just came to check on you. You alright now?" "Yeah...I guess so." "Could, you gonna come back downstairs?" "I don't think I feel like it." "Please? For me?" I sighed, "Will you stay with me? Here? For just a little while?" He nodded, and we lay on the floor. Side by side, our hands lightly touching. "Will we ever be the same again?" he asked me. "No. I don't think so. You found Lyn-Z. I have myself." "I love her Frankie." "I know you do. I love her to." "What?" "She makes you happy, something I obviosuly couldn't make you. She's doing a good job at making you smile. I love her because I love you." Gerard sighed, and his fingers entwined with mine. "I love you to," he whispered. "Then why?" "Why did I marry her?" "Yes!" "Because Frank, you desevre better than me. I always thought you deserved better than me. I've never been good enough for anybody. Lyn-Z claims I am, but I know I'm not. You'll aways deserve better than me Franklin, always." "I never wanted better than you. There isn't better than you. Even if there was, I wouldn't want it. You were the love of my life Gerard...and now look at us." "We need to get downstairs...she'll wonder where we are." "Okay...I'll come with you." I stood up, and hauled him after me. "You sure?" "Yepper," I smiled. Gerard smiled a little to. Lyn-Z was talking to Ray, Bob and Mikey when we got back. "Hey sweetie," she smiled, kissinge Gee. "Frank! she smiled. "You feeling any better?" "Yeah, thank you. I'm gonna go for a walk." I told them. "No," Lyn-Z, grabbing my arm. "I've barely seen you all day. I want five minutes to talk to you." I smiled, "Okay then." We talked about Gerard, about the time in the desert. We talked about music, and lots of stuff. "There, that's better. I feel like I know you now." "She's one hell of a lovely lady Gee," I laughed. "Look after her." Gerard smiled at me, "I will Frank, I promise." "Right, now I'm going for a walk," I told them. This time she agreed and let me go. I wandered through the grounds, finding a beautfiul little alcove. I sat inside it, and relaxed. I smoked another cigarette, breathing all the smoke in. I took of my jacket, rolling up my shirt sleeves. I was sick of this monkey suit. I looked at my arms, littered with scars. I sighed, and traced them with my fingers. I'd done alot of shit in my lifetime...this just added to the list. Lyn-Z appeared, followed by Gerard. "There you are!" she smiled. Then she looked at my arms. Her face fell, her eyes widened. Oh shit. Oh God. Oh Fuck...no. No. NO.

Lyn-Z crouched in front of me, and took my arms in her hands. "Frank...what on earth have you down to yourself?" I just look at her, her eyes filled with tears. Gerard's voice, filled with concern asks "What's going on?" "Come and see," she whispers. I take my arms from her hand, turning them over. "Frank, what's happening here?" he asks looking confusedly at Lyn-Z. "Show him Frank. Show him." "Show him what?" I ask, looking innocent. "You're arms." "Lyn-Z what are you talking about?" "His arms Gerard, they're covered in scars." Gerard, kissed her softly, and whipsered in her ear. "Help him Gerard," she told him, and went back the way they'd came. "Frank, what happened?" I turned my arms over, and he stared down at them. "Oh shit, Frank. Really?" "What do you mean? Really?" "Why? How could you be such a selfish, and idiotic bastard and do this to yourself?!" "Don't dare call me a bastard." "I already have." For the first time ever, I saw red. I punched him in the face, watching in horror as he stumbled backwards. "You dickhead!" he yelled, swinging for me. I ducked, and pushed him over. He was up instantly, swinging for me again. He caught me in the nose, getting grunt out of me. "Gerard, you fucker...you've made me bleed." I dabbed at my nose, wincing. "Oh shit...I'm so sorry." "It's alright I guess." "I'll try again," Gerard sighed. Why the hell would you do this?" "I couldn't live without you Gerard. I know that I promised you I'd be alright...it's never been alright." "Then why didn't you tell me? Why didn't you stop me getting married to Lyn-Z? You could have said something." "You seemed to happy Gerard, you really think I wanted to ruin this for you. I didn't want you to have to leave her. You love her Gerard." "I know I love her Frank. I've married her. Why didn't you call me? Or text me? I would have talked to you. I would have came over. I would have come to visit you. I'd have got you through it all. I thought you trusted me...Fun Ghoul." I closed my eyes, "Party Poison I do trust you. Of course I trust you. I've always trusted you. I had to deal with that alone though. I didn't wanna drag you into this. I couldn't do that to you." "Oh fuck...I'm so sorry Frank. I never kept in touch. I never did anything for you. I never tried to find you. I'm so sorry, that I didn't try and help you." "Gerard, it's okay. You found, a girl and you're married now. I can't loose my feelings for you...but I might fall in love again. I can't ever forget you. You know that right?" "Of course I do. I won't ever forget you either Frank." Gerard's hands held mine, and he stared into my eyes. He leaned into me, and he pressed my lips into mine. I savoured each second of it, as we kissed softly. "I'm sorry Frank." "It's okay Gerard, we better get back to the hotel. I have to go soon." "Where?" "Home. Gerard." "Stay tonight." "I can't." "Please?" "No Gerard. No." We walked in silence. I called a taxi, and smiled once I hung up. "I'm going in ten." "What about your clothes and stuff?" "Can you bring them over?" "Yeah. I'll bring them on Friday." "Okay." Lyn-Z appeared, slipping her hand into his. "Where are you going?" "Home." "Now!?" "Yeah. My taxi's gonna be here soon. "Oh...okay," she sighed softly. I gave her a tight hug, closing my eyes. She hugged me to, and gently kissed my cheek. "I'll see you sometime soon, hopefully." "You will Lyn-Z." "Good, I'm glad." "I'll wait here with him," Gerard told her. She nodded, and waved goobye, wandering back inside. There was a toot from outside. "That's for me," I smiled sadly. "I know. Goodnight Frankie." "Goodnight Gerard." I hugged him really tightly, as I stood outside. It had just started to rain, from the clouds, and my eyes. I climbed into the car, and waved to him. For the first time in my life Goodnight, had meant Goodbye.

It isn't until Friday I here from him again. He comes to see me, on his own...which is weird. "Hi," I yawn sleepily when I answer the door. "Hey Frankie," he smiles. "You coming in?" "If you don't mind." "Course not." I looked down at myself, realising all I had was boxers on. "I should probably put clothes on." He chuckled, "Morning wood." I blushed, and ran upstairs. I pulled on a hoody, and a pair of jeans. "That's better," he grinned. "Come and sit down Gerard. Do you want a coffee or something?" "Yes, please." I potter about, sleepily making him some coffee. I set it on the table for him, slumping onto the sofa. "Here's your stuff by the way Frank," he smiles, handing them to me. "Thank you." "Youre welcome." "So, how's married life?" "Haha! It's nice." "Is she okay?" "She's fine Frankie." "I'm glad to hear it." We silently sip our coffee, and don't say much at all. "Can I admit to something?" he asks me. "Yeah, of course you can." "I miss you Frank." "I miss you to." "I'm not just saying it. Waking up in the morning, turning over...I still wish it was you I was waking up to. I've always wanted it to be you. I've never really though otherwise. I've never missed a person more in my life, than I have missed you. I've missed you so much." "I've missed you to Gerard. We all know I've missed you. I've been lost without you." "I should never have married her?" "Gerard, don't say that. You love her." "I know I love her...but I think it was a mistake.I don't think we were meant for eachother in the way we thought we were." "Its too late now Gerard. Don't break her heart. Don't break her heart for me...I'd hate myself." "It hurts me to not be with you though." "I know Gerard, I know. I've missed you. I wish we could be together." "We can be. I'll leave Lyn-Z, I'll be with you instead." "No, Gerard, no. Go home now. Go and remind yourself how much you love your wife." He just stares at me, "You really want me to go?" "Yes, go home. Go home now." Gerard looked geniunely hurt. "I can't," he sobbed softly. "Please don't cry, it hurts me." He got up, and walked out of my door. He didn't look back, as he climbed into his car. I waved goodbye sobbing myself. I didn't want to see him anymore, it just caused upset for us both.

It has been three weeks since the last time I saw Gee. We don't see eachother, and we don't call. It isn't until the end of the third week, he decides to text me.

Gerard: Frank. Answer me...please.x

Me: Hey.

Gerard: Hey. Can I come over and see you?x

Me: No.

Gerard: Please? Lyn-Z's gone away. I'm lonely.x

Frank: Every time we see eachother, its just hurts us.

Gerard: I know, but I have to see you.x

Frank: You'll have to to just stay outside then.

Gerard: Please don't say that. I know this sounds sappy, but do you remember this song? "Nothing's gonna change the things that you aid. And nothing's gonna make this right again. Please don't turn your back. I can' believe it's hard to talk to you...but you don't understand."x

Frank: Yes. Perfect by Simple Plan.

Gerard: I'm coming over.x

I tried to text him again, but he wouldn't reply. He turned at my door, smiling at me. "Hey Frankie." "Hey Gee," I half smiled at him. "Can I come in?" "I already told you, no." He looked sad, and turned away, as if he was going to leave. "Gerard?" I asked softly. He turned around, and a reached out a hand. Gerard spun around quickly, tickling me under my arms. I collapsed to the floor in a giggley heap. While I was down, he snuck inside. I got up, shutting my door. "You sneaky shit," I laughed. "Come and sit down sweetie," he smiled, patting the sofa. I frowned a little bit, but sat down next to him. His arm went around me, and he pulled me closer. "Gerard, what are you doing?" "I can't take it anymore. I have to hold you close. I have to love you." "But you have Lyn-Z." "I know, but I want to pretend." "Pretend what?" "Pretend that we're still together. That we're still in love, not just good friends. That I'd never met Lyn-Z, and that you still loved me." "You sound crazy Gerard." "I don't care. I've never been sane. I don't give a damn." I looked into his eyes, and only saw sane-ness. I kissed him, pressing my lips into his. He responded to my touch, kissing me hard. His hands gripped my waist, pulling me into him. I kissed him more and more. My fingers found his hair, getting tangled in it. We stopped caring, and got lost in a moment of pure love. I was the first to pull away. "I'm so sorry Gee." "What on earth have you got to be sorry for?" he winked.

We continue or meetings this way for eight weeks. We only see eachother once a week, and that's all we do. We be the way we were, and I couldn't be happier. I'm seeing him today, and he's on his way as I speak. Apparently he has something to tell me, I hope it's good news. Gerard shows up at my door, a half smile on his face. "Hey sweetie," I smile letting him in. "Hey baby," he sighed, as I shut the door. "What's up? What do you need to tell me?" "I think she's cheating on me." "Lyn-Z?" "Yes." "I don't think so Gerard. Besides...it's kind of what you're doing to her." "I know...but it's different." I looked at him confusedly, but let it pass by. "Who would she be cheating on you with though?" "Her ex boyfriend Joel." "Joel?" "He was at my wedding, and they seemed pretty cosy. Apparently it was nothing." "Are you going to do anything?" "No. I'll let her confess to me." "Gee, maybe you should tell her." "That I still love you?" "Yes. It might make things easier. You maker her sound like your biggest regret." "She isn't my biggest regret...but I think I married her too quickly." "Oh. I see." "Do you think I should tell her Frankie?" "I think so...but its your choice." "I'll wait a little longer. Oh, btw...will you come to her birthday party this weekend?" "Yes, I will." "Thank you, I wont get through it without you." I pulled him into my arms, and held him there. I didn't want to let him go, I had to feel his heart beat against me. I had to feel his breath on my neck, and his hands at the small of my back. I whisper in his ear, "I love you." "I love you to," he tells me. I hope he's being honest. I hope, he truly means it. I hope that we end up the way we want and need to be. Gerard comes over again later. When I say later, I mean two in the morning. It's pouring down and he's sobbing hard. "What the hell happened?" "I can't take it anymore. The lying, the cheating. I hate myself Frank." "Its okay Gerard." "It isn't okay. It won't ever be okay. I love you Frank, I don't wanna hide it anymore. I can't hide it." "Then tell her." "But I don't want to hurt her." "It'll be fine, she's a grown woman." "SHE'S PREGNANT!" he blurts out. My face crumples, and I stare into his eyes. "Then we can't ever be together Gerard. You will be in your baby's life." "It's not mine..." he whispered. "How do you know that?" "She told me." "What?" "A week before the wedding, she slept with Joel. And we'd promised to wait until after the wedding." "What are you going to do?" "Nothing. I'm not going to do anything." "You have to help her. She can't do this on her own Gerard." "Then she shouldn't have done this to me!" he yelled. I took a step back, and we stared at each other. Gerard ran into the night, and got into his car. I watched him drive away...waiting, wishing, hoping he'd come back.

Gerard doesn't come back, leaving both me and Lyn-Z behind. I rang him, but he never replied. I went over to Lyn-Z's, and she was panicking alot. "Frank! Where is he? Why won't he come home?" "He will Lyn-Z he will. i promise you that he will come home. Just keep hoping." "Why did he leave me?" "Because, he's upset. He's confused. I think its about the baby." "He told you?" "Yes, he's my best friend, he had to tell me. I made him tell me." "Do you think it hurt him?" "Yes." "I hate myself, I can't live with the guilt." "Lyn-Z, everythings going to be alright. Gerard will come home. I promise." "I love him...but why would he be so selfush?" "I don't think he's being this way on purpose. He isn't a selfish person, he never has been." "You love him, don't you?" she asks softly. "I've always loved him. I always will love him. There is no-one I've ever loved more than Gerard Way." "Then I have to let him go." "What?" "I have to let him go." "No...you love him." "I can never love him as much as you do. Never ever." "Lyn-Z, he needs you. He loves you." "No Frank...he doesn't. He loves you...always have. We married eachother on a whim. We work...but not well enough. I need him, to love me. But I don't need him to love." "So you've been playing with him all this time?" "No." "Yes you have. You've been using my best friend. How fucking dare you!" "Frank, listen. I've never used him, not ever." I look deep into her eyes, and see that she isn't lying. "Please...go home Frank. Get some sleep." I nod, and leave their house. Why Gerard? Why would you do this to us? Don't you know how much we need you. We've always needed you. Gerard...all we want is for you to come home. I try and shut him out of my mind, but I can't. I can't believe he'd do this to me. He made me watch him fall in love with someone else. Telling me she was perfect, something I could never be. I won't ever have him back, and I don't deserve him. I have to have been awful for him to fall in love like that. However now he's left her...completely, or so it seems. I thought he loved her. I thought he loved me. I thought I loved him. Nothing's ever been right for me...I don't see why I thought this was an exception. I can't cope with the pressure and confusion, that I feel inside. Is Lyn-Z leaving him? Am I getting him back? Please...say thats what's happening.

Another week passes...now its been four weeks since he left. Still no sign of him. Still no hope of him coming home. Mikey hasn't heard from him either. Plus, he's been in therapy for certain things. I want to help Mikey, but I have to find Gee first. I can't sleep tonight, I'm missing him more than ever. My phone rings downstairs. I race downstairs, hoping it might be Gerard. I snatch the phone up;

Me: Hello?

Other end: Hello. Is this Mr Franklin Iero?
Me: Yes it is. Who is this?

Other end: This is the local police.

Me: Hello. What's happened?

Other end: Are you the partner of Gerard Way?

Me: Yes, sort of.

Other end: I am sorry to inform you, but we have reason to believe Mr Way comitted suicide earlier this morning.
Me: What? You're kidding right?

Other end: No. He left a note on the Newark Bridge. A member of the public found it, and informed us. There has been no sign of the body.

Me: He's gone.

Other end: Yes. I'm so sorry to have to inform you of this.

Me: Did he have any last words.

Other end: Yes. These are from his note. My darling Frankie, I love you. I always will. Don't ever forget me. I won't forget you. All my love Gerard Way.

Me: Thank you. Goodnight.

Once I'd hung up the phone, I screamed. I screamed and I yelled, and I shouted. I cried. I couldn't stop. I hated him...why would he ever do this? He fucking well disappears, then commits suicide. He's a selfish bastard. He left me behind. He promised he'd never leave me. He promised he'd be by my side until the bitter end. He's a liar. How could he do this? I can't believe it. My angel, my darling...he's gone...

It had been two years since the death of Gerard Way. We never had a funeral, as they never found the body. However we did get a tombstone set up in the cemetery. I'd designed myself, enscripted were the words "At final rest in Cemetery Drive." I have never gotten over it. I never will. I didn't think that there'd ever be anyone else for me. I never thought I'd find someone new. However, I was wrong. I have found someone new. So has Lyn-Z, she ended up with Joel. Also she had her baby, a beautiful little boy. He's called Arthur, in honour of the step father he'll never know. Anyways, back to my new someone. I'm going to meet him today. This will be my first time meeting him. The strange thing is, I don't even know his name. I have been speaking to him for a whole year and a half. We get on well, we're in love. He finally agreed to meet me, after alot of begging and pleading from myself. I'm meeting him in the same cafe, I went to with Gee. I can't wait to see him, I have looked forward to it all week. I eventually learned to drive, and I take a slow drive to where I need to be. I opened up to this stranger, and he knows about my past. I feel as though I can trust him. I think I need him. Not like I needed Gerard, but I do need him. He's helping me stay sane. I drive to the cafe, and when I get out...I begin to cry a little. I sniff, and stop myself breaking down. I walk inside, and sit down at "our" table. I order my coffee and sit and wait. I get a text from him, saying he'll only be a minute. I close my eyes, and hope that he'll be everything I wish he will be. I hear my name, being called softly. I don't turn around, and wait until he joins me. I look at him, and I smile. Raven black hair, messed up by the wind. Pale skin, and a sweet smile. Our eyes lock together, and I only notice one thing. His eyes are hazel...he has hazel eyes. "Two seconds, I'll get a coffee." I blink...did I imagine his eyes? I don't think I did. I wait until he returns, and when he does, I look back into his eyes. "Hi," I smile softly, not looking away from his eyes. "Hi Frankie." "I've known you for one and a half years...and I still don't know you're name." "I know. I wanted to tell you in person." "Ah, I see." "If you please, call me...Party Posion." I stop, I stare. "I've missed you," he whispers, as he kisses me softly. I don't say another word. All I know is that, its a wonderful world.

To be continued :'3