I love every second of it.

When he walks into the room, it's as if I'm naked. I falter. The truth can't twist and turn, so the lies die on my innocently poised lips. But he breathes in the lingering ghost, the same one that wavered on my tongue. We both taste it, I want to spit it out…he chews on it for a while.

Kevin's patience graces my fluttering heart, "Why are you trying to hide it, Gwen?"

His eyes set me on fire, it tears me apart. My emerald gaze downcasts to my fumbling hands, suddenly paling to a resemblance of a napkin, awkwardly settling in my skirt clad lap. He words everything so perfectly. No matter which way my writhing body bends, I can't get loose of the iron grip his words have on me. They encircle me when I need to be taken down.

"Because…" Oh, God. I felt it in my seizing throat: If I didn't get a grip, I would bawl right there.

I wasn't ready to cry in front of him.

The tug-of-war yanked on my heartstrings, the strained chords already worn too thin… It wasn't fair. I want perfection in my pride, after everything… I mean, he has bled tears with my arms draped around him. It's getting so bad…

Choking on my own words, I felt disgrace sink my heart like a ship. I had to spit it out. "I didn't want you to think that…that I was any different than I've made you think. Who I am…I just don't want you to believe it's any different than yesterday."

The doorway innocently framed his strong, towering figure. Somehow, the outline seemed to bring out the dead shimmer in his earthen eyes…

The world outside my bedroom windows shouldn't be blue. Birds shouldn't be singing. The sun couldn't possibly be shining. Because in here, everything was dire. A grayscale urgency clenched my heart in a death grip.

I'd done it. I broke him.

And I knew I could never possibly piece his shattered soul back together.

"The fact," his words quaked, causing my eyes to leak, lodging a spear of hurt into my chest, "that you tried to hide it changes you, Gwendolyn."

I winced, never knowing my own full name could feel like a poison tipped dagger.

His tone was so calm that it soothed his once-clenched muscles. His strong jaw didn't emit a single grind. I swear, it scared the hell out of me. How could he be so calm under these circumstances?

"You know what?" A steady stream trickled down my muddied face, "You're right. And it hurts so bad… to have hidden it all from you. And maybe, just maybe, I wanted you to find out this way."

"But why?"

Those twin, onyx spotlights drenched my shuddering being. Their inky depths almost pleaded…not demanding…

"Because…" my trembling lips pursed in thought. Nails dug into my sweaty palms, beads of scarlet burrowing into the swirls of my finger pads. "I wanted to see if you cared enough…"

"Gwen…"

His warmth flooded my senses just like my tears flooded my face. Muscles wrapped around my wracking body as delicate touches graced my skin. It felt so good…

Maybe nobody liked it when I cried… but Kevin went above and beyond caring.

He loves me.

A/N: Um, hi. I haven't been on here lately because my life really sucks right now. And this drabble or whatever kinda sucks, too. So…I'm taking a break. Review?