Talk with Fhongnum: Hello! Nice to meet you all :D I have something to tell you first and that is… I don't own Shamanking. Sorry for some spelling and grammar mistakes, I'm not that good at English :)
Suggestion: This story is appropriate with the people who are secretly in love with someone... I mean…one-side love… You know what I mean? :) Well, tell me if this story is same as what your heart always feels.
I wish you all who are now reading this sentence… I wish you will success in your love… :)
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Chapter one: Selfish
Love is not to possess…
This is the rule number one of one-side love…
I know… and I always recite that to myself every single second…
…
"Tamao!"
"Y-Yes?"
I run to Anna-sama while answering her calls.
"Where is Yoh? Did you see him?" She asks before looking around.
"No, I didn't."
"Hmm, Okay." She says and walks away.
Oh!...H-Hello everyone. My name is Tamamura Tamao. Nice to meet you… I…I… I don't know what to say next… but… sorr…sorry…
"Phewww!"
"Ahhhhhh!" I shout surprisingly when I hear someone says phew.
That person comes out from the bush and points his finger to his mouth and says…
"Fuuu! Calm down. It's me."
"Y…Yoh…Yoh-sama!" I stutter with my heart beat again.
"Sorry for making you alarmed, but now I'm hiding from Anna, she finally knows I unpurposely broke her favorite tea glass." Yoh-sama says and shows his grin.
"But… if Anna-sama knows you are here… it might be…"
"Ha-ha! How can she know? She just walked away for three minutes ago."
"And how can you know I already walked away." A scary voice says.
"ANNA!" Yoh-sama yells, becoming pallid.
"Come here!" Anna says and pulling his ear, drags him inside the house…
"Ooch!" Yoh-sama cries and can't do anything else…he is just dragged away…
When they two left… A frown appears at my mouth…
It is hurt… to involve in someone who I surely know it's impossible if we would get along…
As you all know…
I have a crush on Yoh-sama…since I was young…
He is always in my sight since I was 8 years old, I can remember everything about him…his kindness, his caring and… and… everything…
But…I can't do anything to success my love… because he already has his heart owner…
…Who is extremely better than me in every way…
She is Anna-sama, I admire her a lot even she is the only one whom Yoh-sama loves… She has a beautiful face with the habit of confidence. Even she mostly shows herself like a brave girl, she also has a sensible feeling as well. She loves Yoh-sama even she does not show that much… But I can feel it… because I'm also a girl.
When I look at her… I look back at myself; I could see the oddly different between her and me… I'm not that pretty and not that confident. I am a shy girl and I didn't confident at all when I do something.
Whoever in the world must want the thing that they can feel it can be the best for him or her… that's true and how come it is strange if Yoh-sama chooses Anna-sama.
Well, but if both of them love each other, no one and nothing can take them apart…
I love Yoh-sama and I can say but the way to show my love is not to steal him from Anna-sama…
I will not do that and even I expect to touch him even a bit… you know it is still impossible…
I sigh as always and walk up inside the house. I'm walking inside my room, sitting on the cushion.
"Tamao! You are a loser again!" Ponchi says irritated me and I just quiet as everyday
"Why don't you do something to success your love!" Konchi asks.
"You will give up!"
"You will let he go?"
"You will become heartbroken girl?"
"You will cry again as every day?"
"You will—"
"Shut up!" I yell angrily. Only this two that I can show all of my emotional out.
"But Tamao…"
"Fine! I will answer all of your questions! First, I will not do something to success my love because I don't want Anna-sama to get hurt and I'm sure that I can't do that as well! Second, yeah! I will give up! Third, you can't say will I let him go because he has never been mine for the first! Fourth, I will become heartbroken girl! Fifth, I didn't cry everyday! I did cry three times per week!"
"Uh…we didn't mean that…" Ponchi says while Konchi nods
"So why did you two always ask me the same question every day!" I ask resentfully.
"That's because we want to see you smile when you get the best thing you want." They shout out
That makes me…feel very impressed…
"Ponchi…Konchi…" I say, about to hug them if they are not…
"That's because if you married with Yoh. That means our lifes are getting a lot better too!"
"Fine!" I say and turn away.
"But Tamao… However we are your ghost guardian no matter we want or not." Pochi says and I frown.
If you are going to make me feel bad…so just don't say it…
"Yeah, look at yourself in the mirror!" Konchi says and drags me in front of the mirror.
"Look! You are a charmless girl! White an old white cloth with long black trousers. And your pink short silly hair style. You have no SEXY CHARM on you!"
"I know!" I push those two away. I know I'm not that charm girl! Why do they like to defame on me!
"Tamao if you dressed in the way more girly. You would see you are such a cute girl." Konchi says smiling
Did I hear it wrong…? Konchi compliments me for the first time of my life…
"I don't want to see you suffer from this. I want you to get what you want. You are a good person but you always being too courteous so you have missed a lot of things you have to get. Tamao…if sometimes you become selfish…there's nothing wrong…" Pochi says, patting my back gently.
God… Ponchi first time saying good stuff to me…
"In the world, all of the people have their selfish on themselves. But it depends on them if they are going to show it out or not. You can be selfish in the right time and you can't be selfish in the wrong time as well. But this time, you have to be…you have to get what you want… You did enough those courteous things" Ponchi and Konchi say in unison.
"Ponchi, Konchi…" I look at them thankfully.
"And we… hey… Ponchi what I have to say next?" Konchi asks and grabs a paper from the table and read it…
"K…Konchi…" Ponchi says kind of alarmingly
"Oh it's here… And we will stand beside you forever! Ok! Let's continue! And we will stand beside you forever…"
Don't tell me…
Don't tell me all the good things they said is just a SCRIPT they wrote…
"Konchi! You break all of our script plan that we have written it last night!" Ponchi smacks at Konshi head.
"Uh…Oh… I'm sorry."
Ponchi and Konchi then turn to me and smile sheepishly…
"That's not fun." I say cold.
"We are so sorry…" Those two say.
"I will not trust in you guys again!" I say and turn to another way…
I'm the most unluckiness girl in the world, even my guardian spirits…they made fun of me…
"Hey… We are really sorry Tamao! But think! If we didn't concern of you… why did we have to write a script!" Konchi says.
"So why don't you just tell it straightly!" I ask.
"That is because if we say it straightly to you without writing a script, we don't know if we can tell you all of what we want to say." Ponchi says.
"Why!" I ask
"Stupid girl! That's because we might get some shy habit from you too much! So we can't tell what we truly mean!" They say in unison again…
I slowly turn to them again…
"Did the things you just said was one part of the script again?"
"No!" They say, blushing.
"Thank you! I love you!" I hug both of them tightly.
"Understood huh? It's time to be selfish." Pochi says.
"But I can't do that." I assure again.
"What!" Konchi exclaims.
"This is not a right time to be selfish. Ponchi, Konchi, Thank you for concerning me. But I know Anna-sama don't' want to lose Yoh-sama as well. I can't become selfish to both of them; they are my important people too. I can't betray them no matter what."
"Understood" Ponchi and Konchi say in unison.
"Good."
"But Tamao… I will not forsake this idea… I want you to smile. Right Konchi?"
"Yes Ponchi, I know Yoh-sama is the right guy for you. I don't want you to lose him."
"Ponchi…Konchi…" I say smiling…
"But we can't decide things by ourselves. You have to do this by yourself." Pochi says
"Yes, I know how hard you feel for a long time." Konchi says.
"I know it's not easy to endure the feeling inside especially when you see the person you love with another girl." They say in unison again.
"Even this is a script or not…I… very thank you." I say thank you to them again. Today they look so cute more than other days.
We keep hugging each other for long time and my tears are coming out again…
It's okay if I will cry four times per week…
It's okay…if I'm going to show my weakness out to relieve some of my pain…
…
Talk with Fhongnum again: to be continued! Thank you for reading! Review please :)