I knew him, from the line of his jaw to how he stirred as he awoke. I could see him with my eyes shut and delighted to do so with them open. Each moment was him, warm and perfect and moving forward with an impossible strength. I stole each untainted moment with him from Eros, who could only watch our ecstasy in envy. We were the same, but opposites. If he were the sun, then I was the moon, shining only because of his bright reflection.
Love.
The word was death to me that mortality only dare imitate. He had pledged it once, without thinking. He had thought he knew his feelings, but infatuation was a poor substitute that enflamed his heart only too let it go. His promise haunted me, made me doubt when I didn't see him before me. If tears could have washed it from existence, I would have wept for it every night…
As a ranger, I didn't cry. It would have betrayed my common sense and handed me over to the enemy of the wild. I remained strong and never shed a tear for anything that didn't require one. In the wilderness, practicality precedes even grief.
But, for him and I, not our passion. We never spoke that word, 'love,' for he had tainted it with his oath like a new sword with blood. But I knew blood and I would have given it for him at the slightest bidding. 'Love' unspoken can mean more than a thousand repetitions. Never would our silent vow loose it's sweet meaning.
If we had winged feet, we would not have been able to be together more. The anticipation of each moment with him sped my heart and my feet in his direction. He was coarse reality that I hurried to obtain. He was amazing to me, like a god, with muscles that rippled under his skin and wisdom of all things.
But it wasn't right. My ears strained for promises that never came and my heart truly yearned for proclamations of love. Hope remained, a silent wish as I stared into the sun, but could never be fulfilled. My spirit and soul cried for his but he had given them away. As time passed, the frantic romance of forbidden meetings gave way to the realization that, to him, I would always be second. I loved him, but I was alone. He did not love me back and his heart, which had once held her, could not contain me. He was of another world; we were even different in our similarities.
Somehow I could not face him in my shame. The disproving eyes of everyone turned upon us, not in jealousy as I had thought, but in hatred for what we did. I had robbed not Cupid of time, but another woman of her love.
I felt in inside of me—a soft heartbeat. My fluttering heart had created a new one. I loved it but I knew I could not be anything for it. What world would it be born into but illegitimacy, need and scorn? Our stolen love had made us thieves and our baby a pilfered treasure. I buried me but lifted my spirit in joy.
It was in the wilderness that she was born. I hadn't bothered to disguise anything—I saw only myself and she could not care. The pain shot through my body as if an animal had attacked me, fighting on its last minute with my arrow in its throat. Months had passed since I had seen her father and he did not know. We had only each other, so she had nothing.
I bathed her in the river and wrapped her in my cloak. Moon, I called her, after myself and, praying that she would never need a sun, I brought her tiny, peaceful form into Bree.
That night I stood by the river. Blood… I had always been willing to risk it and, unbeknownst to be, I had sworn it. Now it was time to fulfill my debt but it no longer frightened me. I stared into the silvery moon and left nothing behind.
AN: Nothing to say about this one except I started out quite cheery and by the end was slightly downcast. Please review!