I don't own Blindspot or any of these amazing characters…
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Okay, I want to write more…but I have totally lost my imagination. I don't know where it went… In an attempt to find it I have started this multi-chapter story that has…plot! Gasp…. I know, I know…I abandoned plot last summer, but this could work out. Maybe. Guess we'll see together. :)
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Jane closed the bathroom door quietly. She didn't want to wake Kurt up. The nightmare had been vivid, but as she lay in the dark trying to come to terms with the pictures in her head, she'd begun to realize that the images had been real.
Remi's memories were painful and as hard as it had been not knowing her past, knowing wasn't any easier.
She was constantly triggered by some random moment and very few of the memories flooding her mind were worth having.
The nightmare had been about when she'd shot at Kurt and he'd flipped the car over and over. She'd done that and remembering it made sweat break out on her forehead. She could have killed him…
Silent tears rolled down her cheeks as that moment replayed over and over in her head.
How was he still with her? His life had been closed off before he let her in, but wasn't even that better than everything she'd put him through? She'd brought the worst evil to his door and then turned around and left him. He'd taken her back only to have her leave him again. All because her psychotic family had been meddling in their lives… Then she turned back into Remi and been told she was dying… And now she's slowly losing her mind. She can't sleep. She wakes up every night with horrible images fighting for domination.
Taking an un-steady breath she tried to pull herself together. She should wake Kurt. That thought came out clearly in the muddle that was her mind. Even as she acknowledged that it was the right thing to do, she didn't move. He looked at her like she was an amazing gift, but she knew she was really just a terrible burden. If she kept piling on the baggage, Kurt would either break under the weight or finally realize nothing she could do would ever make this struggle worth it. She was completely broken…
No more secrets…
The voice in her head was so real that she froze worried she was hallucinating again. Looking around the dark bathroom she realized it was just her guilt talking.
Turning toward the door she straightened up and wiped her face. She opened the door and walked hesitantly forward.
"Kurt," She whispered as she sat on the bed next to him.
He reached for her, still more than half asleep. Since her side of the bed was empty his hand didn't find her. That woke him.
"Jane?" Kurt's head lifted from the bed.
"I'm here," Jane assured him.
He turned toward her immediately and pulled her back down on his side of the bed, "You okay?"
She snuggled into his warmth and took a deep breath.
"No," She admitted quietly.
Kurt pushed up on his elbow so that he could lean over her, now completely alert. "What's wrong?"
"I tried to kill you," Jane met his eyes in the dark and even in the darkness he could read the torment on her face.
"But you didn't," He reminded her.
"I keep….getting all of these memories." Jane tried to explain. "They come out randomly. I never know what I'm going to remember. It's like I'm walking across a minefield and the next step might be the one that kills me…"
His eyes closed at the pain in her voice.
"What do you need?" He worried.
"I…" She had no idea how to answer that.
"Jane?" Kurt kissed her temple.
"I don't know." She finally admitted.
"We can get you a therapist," Kurt insisted, "Someone to help you sort through this."
Jane stiffened. After Bordon and Dr. Sun…she was more than a little reluctant.
"Eventually I'll have to remember everything…right?" She asked hopefully, "Then when the memories stop ambushing me, things will finally get better."
"I don't think you should wait," Kurt worried.
"I don't want to remember everything," Jane whispered into the dark.
Kurt's arms tightened around her securely. He didn't know what to say, so he just held her against him.
"I don't think it's about choice," Kurt finally whispered, his hand gently soothing her back.
"It's never about choice," Jane realized.
"That's not true," Kurt denied, "We chose to be together."
"But for how long?" Jane vocalized her greatest fear.
"What do you mean?" Kurt worried with his hand freezing on her back.
"How can you want to be with someone like me?" Jane finally asked him, "I've brought you nothing but pain and misery."
Kurt pulled her more snuggly against him and kissed her forehead. "All my best moments are with you." He insisted simply.
"And all of your worst moments…" Jane reminded him.
"Yeah," Kurt didn't deny it, "But even the worst moments with you are better than my best moments with anyone else."
Jane drew in an unsteady breath at his utter sincerity.
"Everything worth having in my life starts and ends with you," Jane finally was able to respond.
"We're going to get through this," Kurt assured her, "I'm here for whatever you need…always."
"I love you." Jane kissed his neck.
"I love you too." He wrapped both arms around her and sheltered her from the World. The fight was inside her, but she was the strongest person he knew…
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
"She remembers," The man reported.
"You're sure?" The second man demanded.
"I'm sure."
The second man took a breath.
"It was one thing to have her running around with all of that classified information lost in her head, it's another thing to have her aware of what we did…"
"If Carter had stopped her before she remembered…"
"But he didn't. Looks like that's up to us…"
"What about her husband?"
"If she'd told him, he'd already be after us. Kurt Weller doesn't play the game."
"I'll take care of it."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
"Jane you'll go through the side door," Reade was saying, "Our intel indicates that it should be clear, but be careful."
"Kurt," Reade turned to him, "You'll lead Bravo team in through the back."
"I'm with Jane," Kurt insisted.
"Jane's simply covering our bases," Reade explained, "The real threat is in the back. I need you there."
He didn't tell them that he was protecting Jane, but he was doing his best to ease her back into the field, not only for her sake, but for Weller's.
Kurt wanted to continue to argue, but he realized what Reade was doing and didn't want to push it. If Jane thought they were coddling her, she wouldn't understand.
"Fine," He reluctantly agreed.
"I'll bring Alpha team in from the front," Reade continued.
"Why doesn't Jane get a team?" Rich worried.
"We're her team," Patterson assured Rich.
"But…we're here…" Rich continued to protest.
"It's fine, Rich," Jane assured him, "I've got this."
"Let's move," Reade turned and they headed toward the armory.
"She should get a team!" Rich hissed to Patterson as he watched them walk away.
"There shouldn't be anyone in that area of the warehouse," Patterson insisted.
"Yeah," Rich scoffed, "Like that always works out…"
"We're all worried," Patterson admitted, placing her hand on Rich's arm gently.
Rich didn't answer and she knew he didn't want to admit just how concerned he was so she let it drop.
"Clear," Jane said into the com a little over an hour later.
"Taking the front," Reade announced and Rich and Patterson could hear the door charge go off in the background.
"Going in the back," Kurt responded simultaneously.
"Taking fire," Kurt warned the others.
"We're coming," Reade assured him.
The fight was loud, but the teams converged and before long the men from the warehouse were in custody.
It was only after the shots died down that Kurt called to Jane, "Jane, you clear?"
When there was no response, Kurt asked more desperately, "IS JANE CLEAR?"
Patterson was busy typing on the computer, trying to locate Jane's signal.
"Did we lose her?" Rich demanded. He was standing very still as he watched Patterson's fingers flying over the keyboard.
"Patterson?" Kurt demanded. The tension they could hear in his voice painful to listen to.
"We've lost her signal," Patterson admitted, "It could just be a technical malfunction."
"Reade?" Kurt demanded, now on the move with his only goal to find his wife.
"She's not here," Reade was forced to admit. "I need any agent not currently processing the suspects to search for Jane Doe."
Twenty minutes later there was no question, Jane was gone.
Kurt approached Reade, his eyes wild.
"We found her coms," Reade admitted, "And her weapon."
"Was there any…" Kurt couldn't ask if she'd been wounded.
"There was some blood, but not enough to be fatal and we don't even know if it was Jane's." Reade explained.
"Well, she wouldn't have just left." Kurt argued.
Reade didn't say anything. Jane had left before…
"It's not like that," Kurt knew what he was thinking.
"You said she was struggling with all of Remi's memories." Reade worried, "Maybe it got to be too much for her."
Kurt's jaw clenched and his hands balled into fists, "She didn't leave on her own."
"No," Rich agreed, "We found video surveillance that shows her being removed from the warehouse and taken away in a van."
"Can you follow where they're taking her?" Kurt demanded.
"We're trying to do that now," Patterson assured him.
"I should have been with her!" Kurt glared at Reade.
"We're going to find her," Reade insisted.
Kurt turned away without saying anything, he couldn't lose her now…
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
"Was she unconscious or…" Rich was looking at Patterson.
"If they had killed her, they wouldn't have bothered to take her," Patterson insisted.
Rich wilted in relief. She was right. He should have realized that himself…but seeing Jane's unconscious body being thrown into the back of that van had short circuited the logic center of his brain.
"You didn't tell Kurt…" He accused her.
Patterson stopped and turned to Rich aggressively, "What?" She demanded, "You wanted me to tell Kurt that Jane was carried out of that warehouse like she was dead? That the two huge men that took her threw her in the back of that van like she was garbage? How about the fact that we lost the van? Should I tell him that?"
Her unravelling helped him to find clarity.
"No," He agreed, "What we're going to tell him is that we found her."
"Damn right," Patterson turned back toward her keyboard and Rich took a deep breath and turned off his panic. He could panic later, after they found Jane…
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Jane woke up slowly. Shifting uncomfortably, she slowly started to realize something was wrong…
The last thing she remembered was breaching the warehouse…
Her eyes flew open in panic. Where was Kurt? Blinking several times she at first thought she'd gone blind again. Then she realized she was simply looking at absolute darkness.
Her hands reached out and encountered wood. Running her hands along the edge, she realized it wasn't just a roof…it was a box.
Her mind balked at the sudden realization, she was in a box…
Her breathing became erratic and unable to prevent the panic from setting in she opened her mouth and an anguished scream escaped…."KURT!"
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
"Is it taken care of?"
"Yeah," The man confirmed.
"She's dead?" There could be no room for doubt.
"As good as…"
"What?"
The man raised the cloth to his still bleeding nose. "We took care of it."
"For your sake you better hope so."
Hanging up the phone he turned to his accomplice.
"We should have just shot her." His partner warned.
"She broke my nose and three of my fingers…" The first one complained.
"So you bury her alive?" The second said in disgust.
"You didn't know her before," The man insisted, "She was lethal in a way you can't teach…"
"All the more reason to put a bullet in her head!" The second man argued.
"No," The first denied, "She's right where she needs to be."