Hey everyone! This is my second fic overall and my first Glee fic. Hope you enjoy it!
I want to thank my supermegafoxyawesomehot beta (who I will not name) who is always willing to beta my fics, even though she should be working on her own fics or on her school stuff.
Please feel free to leave reviews at the end!
Apologies and Acceptance
"Here we are," Dave said, stopping in front of the classroom. "Third period, French class." He was carrying out Santana's plan to get elected prom queen, and for him to hide his sexuality to the rest of McKinley. If his sexuality was revealed . . . he didn't even want to think of the potential consequences. Sure, he and Santana had started the Bully Whips, which has stopped the bullying, but, still, it could all change if news of his sexuality came out.
"I'm going to Calculus, so wait inside the classroom after the bell rings 'till I get back to walk you to lunch," he continued. Instead of going into the classroom, Kurt stopped at the door.
"Have you noticed that no one has bullied me this week?" He asked, looking at Dave.
"That's 'cause the Bully Whips are protecting you." Dave replied.
"But maybe," Kurt countered back, "maybe, no one's been harassing me this week because nobody cares." What's he trying to say? Dave thought. The bullying has stopped because of the Bully Whips. But is it possible that . . . nobody cares?
Dave had bullied Kurt the most before Kurt moved to Dalton. But he and Santana established the Bully Whips to stop bullying at McKinley. Stopping the bullying can cause Kurt to return to McKinley and the New Directions. Santana would be praised as the hero, since the New Directions' chances of winning Nationals would increase with Kurt back. With Santana as the hero, she would be elected prom queen, and he would be elected prom king. Despite all of this, is it possible that the bullying at McKinley stopped not because of the Bully Whips, but because he stopped? No, that's ridiculous, Dave thought.
"Okay, look," Kurt continued. "I'm not saying that everyone at this school is ready to embrace the gay, but at least they've evolved enough to be indifferent.
"I can see how miserable you are, Dave. I could just hate you when were bullying me, but now, all I see is your pain. You don't have to torture yourself over this."
At this, Dave was shocked. Sure, it has been painful to hide his sexuality to everyone in the school, but he didn't realize that Kurt would notice this. How could he have noticed this? I thought that I was doing a pretty good job of hiding it. His facial expression must have betrayed his thoughts, because Kurt added, "I'm not saying you should come out tomorrow, but soon, because the moment will arise when you can."
Dave reflected on what Kurt just said. He reflected on what would happen if it was him that experienced all the trouble that he gave Kurt. What if it was me? What would I have done?
"What's wrong?" Kurt asked, looking at him. Dave felt tears prickling in his eyes. I can't start crying in front of anyone, he thought. Especially Kurt! He was . . . he was the person I admired the most. He was so confident, and he was so true to himself. He wasn't afraid of who he was . . . at least, until I started bullying him. The tears spilled out as he thought of this.
"I'm so . . . I'm so freaking sorry, Kurt. Just so . . . sorry for what I did to you." Dave had started crying.
"I know" Kurt said simply. Did he? Did he know how awful Dave felt after Santana showed him all of those stories? Did he know how sorry he was that he did all of this to Kurt? Did he know how guilty he felt about the fact that Kurt could have killed himself?
"No, you don't," Dave said. "I couldn't face my sexuality, so I bullied you, the one person who wasn't afraid. I didn't realize how . . . difficult it was for you, until I got expelled from the school, and when you moved to that private school. I wish I realized it so much sooner than this. I'm so, so sorry, Kurt. I really am."
"Dave," Kurt said. "You are torturing yourself. Please, think about what I said earlier." With that, Kurt went in to his classroom, leaving Dave with his very confused thoughts.
As Dave walked to calculus, he thought about what Kurt had told him. You don't have to torture yourself over this. He wasn't torturing himself over this. He was totally fine with hiding his sexuality to the rest of the world, and being Santana's beard. But was he fine with it?
This question bothered him through Calculus, and through the rest of the day. He forgot to pick up Kurt from French and walk him to lunch, and he paid no attention to the rest of his classes.
I can't just come out to the entire school, he thought. Azimio would make fun of me, I'd get slushied every single damn day. I'd be like the rest of the Glee Club; I'll be a loser, I'll be a nobody.
Think about it though, another side of his mind argued back. If you came out, you wouldn't be miserable like you are now. You wouldn't have to pretend to like Santana; heck, even Santana might be able to follow your lead, and she might finally be happy, too, seeing as how she would be able to date Brittany without backlash. You would be able to finally accept who you are, and not be afraid of what other people think of you. You can be stronger if you do.
Be strong like Kurt, he added. Not having a secret, especially a secret this big, would be nice. It would allow him to walk around the school with Kurt's courage. Maybe, just maybe, he'll be able to decide by the time prom came around.
"Can I have your attention, please," Principal Figgins said, tapping the microphone. Quinn, Lauren, Santana and the other prom queen candidates stood on Figgins' right side, while Puck, Karofsky and the other prom king candidates stood on Figgins' left side. Finn had been kicked out of the prom, since he fought with Jesse, Rachel's date, for God knows what reason. "The votes are in. This is the moment you've all been waiting for; this is where we announce our junior prom king and also junior prom queen.
"Roll the drum, please," Figgins continued. "This year's junior prom king is . . . David Karofsky!"
"Yes!" Dave said, as he went forward to accept his crown. One part of Santana's plan down, he thought, as he smiled at the crowd.
"You suck so bad, Quinn Fabray," he heard Santana say from behind him. "I won." He wasn't looking at her, but he can picture the scene between the two. He can see Santana whispering this tauntingly to Quinn and Quinn just rolling her eyes.
"And now," Figgins finally was going to announce the prom queen. It better not be Quinn Fabray. I really don't want to dance with her, Dave thought. Imagine how awful she would be if she wins. "Your 2011 McKinley High prom queen, with an overwhelming amount of votes," he paused, seemingly hesitant on what he was going to say, "is Kurt Hummel."
Dave looked at the audience, where Kurt stood frozen, stunned at the results. Before anyone could do anything, he ran out of the room.
"Kurt!" Blaine, his boyfriend, called, running after him "Stop!" Santana and Quinn also ran out, with Brittany and Rachel respectively following them.
What do I do? Karofsky thought, panicking. With Kurt as prom queen, that means that I have to dance with him. And if I dance with him, then everyone will think I'm . . . I'm gay. I don't know what to do.
If I don't dance with him, one side of him thought, then I can go keep pretending to date Santana, but still be miserable about who I am. Not dancing with him will keep me from becoming like a loser like the Glee Club . . . I can keep walking the halls of McKinley as a top dog and continue keeping the school safe with the Bully Whips.
But if I dance with him, he continued to reflect on his predicament, I can stop being miserable. I can possibly be happy. I can finally accept who I am, and maybe influence Santana to do the same. I know she's miserable, too. She needs to be happy. She deserves to be happy, just like I do.
Dave then thought about the cons of dancing with Kurt. Dancing with him seems like a good idea, but what about the backlash? I can be kicked off the football team, Azimio will slushee me every single day. I'll lose my status in this friggin' school. He looked around the room as he reflected on this. Hiding his sexuality caused him to become prom king. If it wasn't for that, he probably wouldn't be prom king right now. Is my status at this school more important than my own happiness? He thought, but before he could figure out the answer to the question, Kurt, Blaine Santana, Brittany, Quinn and Rachel walked back in the room.
Principal Figgins, who had remained on stage the entire time, said, "Ladies and Gentlemen, your 2011 prom queen, Kurt Hummel." He placed the crown on Kurt's head and handed him the sceptre.
Kurt looked awkwardly at his audience before saying "Eat your heart out, Kate Middleton." Slowly, the other students started applauding him, and he smiled, gaining his confidence back.
"And now," Figgins started to say, "Behold the tradition . . ." Dave wasn't listening. He was still worrying about what he was going to do: was he going to dance, or not? He slowly walked back to the stage, where Kurt greeted him.
"Now's your moment," Kurt said. "Come out and make a difference. Make a difference in this school, Dave. Change its ways, and help it become a better school."
A song started to play. Dave was still unsure of what he was going to do.
You can dance, you can jive, having the time of your life
See that girl, watch that scene, dig in the dancing queen
However, after hearing the first few lines of Dancing Queen, he changed his mind. He wanted to be happy. At that moment, he didn't care about his status, or what other people will think. All he cared about was his happiness. With this, he held out his hand to Kurt, who took it, and he started dancing with him.
"I'm kinda new to this thing," Dave said to Kurt, as they awkwardly danced in circles.
"What, to dancing or to being out?"
"Both," Dave said. And they continued to dance around, ignoring the pointed looks from the other students, especially the students from the football team.
"Excuse me, Dave," Blaine said. "I'm glad that you've finally accepted who you are as a person, but can I cut in?"
"Go ahead," Dave said, letting go of Kurt. "But I just want to say thank you. For helping me accept who I am. I really appreciate it." Blaine and Kurt smiled at him, before leaving to dance with each other. Dave looked around the room. No one seemed bothered by this revelation. They were all having fun, dancing with their partners. Dave smiled to himself and thought, Maybe this . . . wouldn't be as bad as I thought it would be.
"I'm glad to see that you're happier now, Dave," Kurt said to him one day, as the football player passed by him in the halls. It was true; Dave was happier now that he had come out. There was still no bullying in the halls of McKinley, due to Santana and Dave continuing the Bully Whips. Now, a few of the Glee Club members had joined them, including Kurt, which made it easier to stop the bullying at McKinley. Dave wasn't kicked off the football team, and the school had gained a new respect to homosexuality, thanks to the establishment of the school PFLAG club.
"I still owe you for that, Kurt," Dave replied. "I wouldn't have been able to come out if it weren't for you. So thank you. For everything." Kurt simply smiled at him, and walked to his next class.
Dave reflected on how things have changed, and how they haven't changed since he danced with Kurt during prom. This was definitely the right decision, Dave thought, walking to his next class. I'm surprised that I haven't been kicked off the football team, but then again, the guys from the Glee Club have started supporting me more ever since prom. I really am happier; life at this school seems easier. Azimio stopped talking to me. It was a shock at first, but now I've just accepted it. I don't know what the other people at school say about me, and I'm not sure if it bothers me or not.
Dave reached his next class. He looked around the halls one last time, before going in to his class. Yep, he decided, It doesn't matter if people care that I'm gay or not. All that matters is that I'm happy.