So my sweets, the most pineapplicious writer in this fandom sent me a little . . . uhm, ::pauses:: LITTLE? ::scoffs:: Yeah–Right. We've ALL seen the pics and know how well-endowed our boy is – let me rephrase – she sent me a MASSIVE present for my birthday! A side-shot, crack-fic, wet-dream-cum-to-life, awhateveryouwannacallit, it's MY frickin story with Surferward ::cue wet panties:: written especially for me by the bloody BRILLIANT Suzie55 from her story "Welcome to Paradise".

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Oh, and yes, There. Will. Be. FUCKHAWT pineapple's JSYK . . .

"Knock, knock," he said, confident and sexy, "you ready for me, sexy?"

But, his tone didn't matter, because Mon Amour always thought he was sexy no matter what he said.

"Very ready, baby," Mon Amour called out, repositioning herself one last time on top of the towel which laid on top of his surfboard.

"Wow!"

That was a good reaction she thought right before she spoke again, "Hey, babycakes, I know how partial you are to your board..." She stretched out her long, lean, tanned legs, smirked, and arched a challenging eyebrow up at him. "So, I thought it might be fun…" She left the sentence unfinished for him to fill in the blanks.

"Holy fuck, M," he stated almost incoherently as he raced towards her, hard just from the sight of her on his favorite board. He looked at her sex as he prowled towards her; her sex glistening like morning dew just for him as the sun set through the large picture window.

She was always ready for him though and that made him impossibly harder. She always made him impossibly and painfully harder. Only her. Only Mon Amour did this to Surferward.

He wasted no time in lowering his firm body down on top of her and kissing her lips. She didn't grant permission and he didn't ask, but it was a given that they both wanted this, they needed this. So, Surferwards' tongue came out and kissed her with a passion that they only felt for each other, intense and deep.

She sat up and gasped at his lips on her then laid back down and enjoyed his talented mouth on her lower lips, kissing her, like only he knew how while eliciting the most delicious feeling that was beginning to tingle deep inside of her. Mon Amour felt her center heat up as he worked his magic. She started to quake with bliss and when he quickened his motion, he moaned in his own bliss.

She melted back into the mattress, relaxed. Surferward climbed up her, pecking wet, juicy kisses along her body causing her to shiver with delight. He looked at her and when she offered to return the favor, he said, "Baby, I came. Feeling you explode around me was too much." He chuckled under his breath as if embarrassed, but his erotic side kicked back in again. "You are fucking delicious, baby." He stroked back her hair. "And so beautiful," as he touched between her sensitive folds, he said, "inside and out."

"I'm all yours, always," Mon Amour said, soft, but strong in her meaning.

He picked her up off the board, deemed that his lucky board from now on then set her on the bed, gently and carefully, treating her like the treasure she is.

Surferward then kissed her and with their shared breath mingling, he whispered into her mouth, "Happy birthday, baby."

As he entered her, she pulled a silver bowl from the nightstand, flashed the pineapple chunks in his direction, and asked her lover, "Hungry?"

No words were further exchanged as he attacked her body with renewed energy and passion. The only sounds heard the rest of the night were their moans of pleasure mixed with the crashing waves outside the open window.

THE ʘ‿ʘ END

Now that you've read my bday titbit, I know you are quite literally aching to read the rest, so I've included the links below to help ease your pain. Though a few things to remember once you begin reading "Welcome to Paradise": put on trousers before leaving the house, turn in the report your boss requested, pick-up the kiddies from school, cook dinner for the family, but most important of all to remember . . . your hubs will NOT look like, sound like, act like, taste like, or have the size, controll, stamina, or mastery of his cock that Surferward does. You simply have to do what the rest of the ladies in the fandom do . . . close your eyes and pretend. Just a suggestion, my sweets! It ain't called "Welcome to PARADISE" for nothing.

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Your gateway to Surferward and "Welcome to Paradise": www(.)fanfiction(.)net/s/6115911/1/Welcome_To_Paradise (just remember to remove parenthesis) and don't be too disappointed when you discover the rest of the story takes place with that brown-eyed, brunette, Bella. (We all know Surferward secretly prefers blue-eyed, gingers, named Trayce.) Besides Suzie gives us so many FECKTASTIC lemons that you will NEVER be able to look at a pineapple the same way again.

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You can also go ask questions and find teasers at the forum for "Welcome to Paradise" here: www(.)twilighted(.)net/forum/?f=44&t=10501#p1045145 (just remember to remove parenthesis)

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Lastly, if you'd really like to chat with the author suzie55 or her muse surferward you can do so on Twitter: www(.)twitter(.)com/Suzie55 or www(.)twitter(.)com/Surferward (just remember to remove parenthesis)