Oswald Cobblepot was walked the streets of Gotham that chilly December day, doing some, ah, window shopping, when something caught his eye. The object was so shiny, he stopped waddling. So sparkly, he almost dropped his umbrella. So big, so beautiful, it made him turn to look. And—most importantly—it looked expensive.
There it was: the perfect ring for his feline companion. He entered the store to scope out the ring. He asked the woman working there how much it cost. Ouch. Too much. Far too much…well, there were other ways to get it.
"Are you getting married?" the woman asked, smiling stupidly.
Penguin returned the smile in an exaggerated manner, becoming a caricature of the woman in front of him. "If all goes as planned."
"Well, she's a very lucky lady. Just for the record, I think you'll make a great mayor."
Penguin squawked his odd laugh. "Thank you."
"So, when will you be coming back to pick up the ring?"
"Whah? Let's not talk about that."
"Oh…okay."
"I'll come back when I've got money. Don't pressure me; this kind of thing takes time."
"Alright. I'll see you later then, Mr. Cobblepot."
Penguin left the store, muttering to himself. "Sure you will, I'm sure you will."
When Penguin got back to his lair, he told his henchmen about the ring, told them it was the biggest, shiniest ring in the store and that they couldn't miss it.
As it turned out, they did miss it. They missed it by far. Instead of the ring Penguin wanted, he got an insignificant gold band with no diamonds at all. How could he win over a cat with a ring that didn't even have any diamonds!
"You incompetent imbeciles!" he shouted, throwing the ring. "I said I wanted the big, shiny one!"
"We tried, boss," replied one of the henchmen in a what-could-we-do voice. "It just wasn't there."
"What?" He paused, contemplating. "Someone else must have beaten me to it. But who?" Oh well, he decided. He'd try with the ring he had, anyway. He doubted it'd work, but it was worth a try.
When Catwoman turned him down flat, he blamed it on the ring.