~Bella~
I stare up into the cloudy, dreary sky as I slowly make my way through the place that I hated to visit the most. Not only because I'm concerned that someone from my former life might see me, wanting me to explain why I still looked like a 19 year old teenager, but because of the memories that cloud my mind with every step I take. As I walk down the small, two-way streets of Forks, Washington, I see Newton's Hardware Store where I used to work, my old High School, the small diner where Charlie and I used to go out for food instead of me making his food. He always was a terrible cook. All these landmarks that were once a part of my life now only seemed like shadows on the wall, cast by a dying flame.
I continue to walk down the street, feeling the piercing eyes of every human that crossed my path, gawking at the strange woman they had never seen in their town before. It's only a matter of time before someone notices me. But how could they? I only came back once every few years. Almost all my friends from when I was human were either's dead, moved away, or to wrapped up in there own family life to notice trivial things like the reanimated corpse of a former friend gliding down the street. Even after 50 years of being a vampire I still never got used to being beautiful, although it did get easier to deal with people who stared, but aleast I don't have to worry about the sun. One of the best parts about Forks: it's constantly shrouded in a vial of cloud covering, which is a good thing for me. It's hard enough walking around looking like I do- pale, white skin, bright golden eyes, seemingly perfect stride- it's another thing entirely to try to explain to onlookers why my skin sparkles brilliantly in the sunlight.
Every time I come here, I get the urge to dwell on my surroundings, to take everything in for a moment, telling myself that it is the last time I would do it. I quickly stomp out those feelings for the sack of doing what I came here to do in the first place. It has been over 30 years since Edward and I lived in the tiny two bedroom cabin just outside of town. After Charlie's death, my other family and I decided that it would be to risky to stay any longer, so we all decided to move to New York, then a small city in Canada, then finally resting in Alaska, taking residence in a house not to far away from the Cullen's sister clan in Denali. We started high school, pretending to be freshmen that had been left back a grade. To be perfectly honest, it didn't really matter where we went, so long as I have my loving husband Edward and our breath-taking daughter Renesmee, or Nessie.
I diverge from the main road to enter into the park, heading towards the wright iron gates of the town cemetery. I slowly make my way to the very back, coming to a tallest tomb stone in the graveyard. Courtesy of Edward, the tombstone was built from white marble with golden engagement and angel designs. I stand in front of it for a brief minute before falling to my knees, the ground beneath me indenting from the density of my body. Every part of me wanted to brake down. I can feel the deep pressure in my gut swell up as my mind cries out in pain, yet my body refuses to respond. If have ever missed anything about being a human, it's the ability to cry. It's strange, when I was first turned, I might have of that as a check in the 'Pro Vampire' column. (Edward being the first on the list.) Even all these years, the sting of death still burns me deep down. I look down and read from the plaque.
"…Charles Swan…Decorated Police Chief. Father. Husband."
My eyes start to burn a little, but nothing comes out. "Sorry that I'm late Charlie…I know I'm only a week late, but you always told me about being on time." The words were almost forced as I try to say the right thing to say. I could only guess what Charlie would say to me now. Something along the lines of not beating myself up, it was more his fault, that I need to stop apologizing for everything. What I wouldn't give to hear him this deep toned voice lecturing me again. At this point I would even be happy reliving the awkward sex talk that he forced out of me the first time he found out about Edward. The image of Charlie holding his shotgun in his hand as he walked in on Edward and I sitting, apparently, too close on the couch appeared in my head. I allow myself a quick laugh under my breath before looking back to the plaque. I look to the engravement next to his name, which writes 'Sue Clearwater'. "You too, Sue, sorry I'm late. Seth and Leah send thier love."
"Anyway, we've all had a pretty busy year. We moved up to Alaska and started High School again. Edward, Alice, Jasper, Nessie, and I enrolled as freshmen, held back of course. Rosalie and Emmet are sophomores." A small smile creeps across my face. "People at the school are already talking about how much Renesmee looks like me and Edward, even though we're all supposed to be unrelated. Crazy rumor flying around, I swear, sometimes I wonder why I even go back there. But I'm getting off topic..." How do I say this?
"I should tell you why it's been such a hectic year. You see…you have a grandson now." I try to fight back a smile that was trying to emerge from the corner of my lips through the sorrow. "Well…adopted grandson actually. His name is Vincent. He reminds me a lot of you. Want to hear how it all happened?" I allow a brief moment of silence, as if expecting a response from the pale white stone. "Good. Hopefully when you hear it you won't get mad at me for being late." I try to smile.