AN: Oh come on! Why couldn't Rose stay with the Doctor? Bugger, this Russell T. Davies. Genius, but bugger.
All rights for Doctor Who are the BBC's.
Every night as she's watched the stars, she was thinking about him. The tall man who came and took her across the stars. The man who became both her lover and her best friend. The man with whom she'd shared more adventures than with anyone else, ever. She's watched the stars and thought about him, wondering if she'd ever see his big blue box again.
Even as her husband held her, she was sometimes thinking about him. He'd hold her the way she always wanted him to, his arms holding her tightly and she's lying safe between his arms. He was her husband, the man she loved, the man with whom she decided to spend the rest of her life with, but sometimes, every once in a while, she was still thinking about that other man. She was still thinking about him flying around in the universe, still wearing those same old clothes, and wondered if she'd ever seen him again.
She knew she wouldn't. A part of her knew that this was the last time she'd ever see him. But a part of her screamed that just like this time, she still might see him again someday. Maybe when he learns how to open a rift again the way the Time Lords used to do. Maybe when the universes will be in danger again and they will reunite. Maybe when he'll realize she cannot live without him, no matter who he gave her. Even if he was the same as the Doctor was when she'd first met him, all these years ago, and even if he had all his memories, a part of her always whispered that he wasn't the Doctor.
There was so much good in it. He still had the Doctor's wit and wisdom and quick thought. He still had the Doctor's looks and the Doctor's traits. The only thing he didn't have was the Doctor's lifespan, and that wasn't a bad thing, but a good thing. A very good thing. But still, he wasn't the Doctor. Not her Doctor.
And so even though she loved the man by her side more than any other man, even though they were happy together the way she and the Doctor were never meant to be, she sometimes still thought about him, remembered him, her adventures with him. Despite how happy she was with the Doctor's Duplicate, her own Doctor, she still thought about the original Doctor sometimes – and missed him like she hasn't missed anyone in her life.
He knew that, and he was always willing to support her. He understood. He helped her through these feelings and she helped him through his rage. He supported her, helped her find the Doctor in him and fall for him the way she fell for the Doctor, and she helped him be a better man the way she helped the Doctor.
But sometimes, as she watched the sky and thought about him, she'd wonder if he'd ever thought about her.
She didn't know that he was thinking about her every waking moment of her life. She didn't know that he still felt that terrible pain of losing her. She didn't know he still couldn't forgive himself for losing her, not once, but twice. She didn't know some days he would rather have destroyed all universes than let her go.