It was a quiet night in the studio. The lights had been dimmed to match the dozey mood of the night. The furnace burned brighter as it fed on the coals with crackles and pops, breathing a warm and ashy ambiance in to the room that kept the cold, wild blowing wind outside and at bay.
Wiz had stepped out some time ago, leaving Boomstick to his own company. Sitting at at his end of the desk Boomstick toyed and tinkered with a large, obviously makeshift type of gun that he had been cleaning and upgrading to pass the time.
The process of studying the small parts and occasionally buffing away their grime had almost become a sort of zen practice what with how long he had been at it now. With the time given to him Boomstick grew to enjoy this quiet and solitude that came with being alone with his tools, his arsenal, and a cold case of beer.
Staring closely at the innards of the weapon he made, it's parts illuminated under his desk lamp, he used a sharp, thin tool and careful strokes so as not to scrath the metal of the gun.
Just then Wiz barged in with a loud open and slam of the door, announcing;
"I'm back!"
Boomstick jumped a full inch from his seat in a fit of shock as his soul nearly leapt from his body and out his mouth but to his relief all that escaped was a half grunt, half yelp.
"Hwagh?!"
Boomstick threw up his arms in suprise bumping the desk, knocking his lamp, and causing the tool he held to escape his grip, flinging it away and straight up in to the ceiling.The lamp stopped teetering and landed right on to Boomstick's gun; shattering the bulb in to a dozen pieces and forcing the gun to fire a small, rubberish cannon ball that bounced against the ceiling and floor several times over until finally it lost momentum and rested at Wiz's feet.
Wiz stepped aback, his face agape and chest puffed with horror for what would happen next.
A moment passed, the air settled, and Wiz snaped back in to the moment with a sigh of relief.
"Hwoah."
Wiz relaxed and allowed himself to regain his composure.
"Boomstick, I-"
Just then the tool broke free from the home it had punctured into the ceiling and fell perfectly on the former projectile that layed at Wiz's feet, stabbing it spectacularly.
"Aw hell."
Wiz felt all strength fade away and collapsed his shoulders, exhaling a very defeated sigh.
The bullet cracked in half allowing a pungent, pale, greenish cloud to escape and hover in to Wiz's face.
Wiz coughed and hacked and forced himself to drop his groceries so he could sheild his now twisted up and disgruntled face from the absolute onslaught that had begun on his senses.
"Guh! B'woah my god, Boomstick, what in the name of mathematics was I just assaulted with?!"
By then Boomstick was able to fall completely back to Earth and swivel his chair around to realize what had just happened.
"Awww man. That was like. All the brimstone I had left! Wasted brimstone if I may add. AND skunk extract. Thanks alot."
"Oh my god, man just... why?"
"I was trying to make some of that liquid ass stuff"
"Then why not just buy liquid ass?"
"Buying stuff is for idiots. Duh."
"ITS LIKE A DOL-I...ugh..."
Wiz caught himself and could only exhale his frustrations while he pinched to his brows.
Boomstick crossed his arms and started with a forced sarcastic tone at first but it quickly grew in to a more annoyed rant.
"Why do always gotta barge in to every-"
Boomstick was cutshort quickly and unexpectedly when Wiz darted in to Boomstick's space and slapped something that sounded heavy in front of him.
"Merry Christmas, jackass."
"Huh?"
Boomstick's wagging finger ceased and he turned back to the desk in front of him to see an elegantly decorated, perfectly square box wraped with a vibrant red wrapping paper and tied with a ribbon. A spectacle that even Boomstick would have to admit was pretty to look at.
Realizing what was in front of his eyes Boomstick's excitement began to peak fast.
"Oh woahohoho!"
Boomstick, absolutely filled with a joyus surprise, snatched up the package and hopped out of his chair and on to his foot with all the elegance of a ballerina, albeit one who may have knocked back a few glasses of wine before the big show.
With a big grin on his face Boomstick held his gift up to his head where his ear met it half way, gently shaking the box a bit to feel a heavyish mcguffin rattle against the sides of the package. Wiz stopped him however, telling him to be careful.
"That thing shouldn't be too roughhoused. You don't have to be gentle exactly but don't go tossing it around."
Boomstick looked as if at any moment he'd spill over with growing excitement while he repeatedly looked to Wiz and the box back and forth over and over.
"Aw, man you know suprises work me up! What is it? Will I like it? How much does it weigh? Can I have a hint? What is it? What is it? What is it?!"
As Boomstick pressed him Wiz felt the supply of patience he had for the rest of the night being spent faster and faster until finally he had to do something.
"Boomstick!"
Wiz grabbed his swarthy co-host by each shoulder with a tight enough grip for Boomstick to feel Wiz's fingers, both flesh and metal, gently press against his bones causing him to pause in place with eyes still wide and smile still ear to ear.
"Chill."
With that Boomstick relaxed and exhaled his accumulated zeal, calming himself and allowing the lids of his eyes to relax.
"Aheheh. Sorry. Well uh. I don't have a tree yet, and probably won't for a while what with my shack falling over yesterday and all, so..."
Boomstick pulled a sheepish look for just a second or two and tried to hand the gift back over to Wiz however keeping a hungry look locked on to the box as he did so.
Wiz looked at him confused.
"You know you can open it now right? Why else would I have given it to you now?"
Boomstick flexed back in to his excitable state and reeled the present back in to his arms, almost hugging it.
"Really?!"
Boomstick's face and voice was beaming excitement again but only for a moment until he realized the circumstances.
"Wait. Why? It's still November!"
Boomstick inquired Wiz with a raised brow and a wide eye sharp as the tool he had earlier flung and already forgot about.
"No reason. I just know you hate waiting. And maybe you'll leave me alone for the rest of the night if you're busy."
Wiz had picked up his platic bags of snacks and was sitting at his computer now, less willing to pay Boomstick much attention outside of small responses squeezed out from between the fingers holding up his chin.
Boomstick brushed aside his gun and the shards of glass to give the new object of his attention more breathing room and rested the gift on the desk before sitting back down.
"Yeah..."
Boomstick's eyes narrowed and his brows came closer to touching the more he glared at the gift now.
He looked over to Wiz a bit suspicious.
"Is this a trick?"
Wiz couldn't help but snort out the nose and chuckle before turning his chair to face Boomstick with a very matter of fact expression and an almost smirk that tried to hide it's self away in one of Wiz's cheeks.
"Boomstick, if I were tricking you; you wouldn't know it."
Given his past experiences Boomstick had to comply with the fact of the matter and felt his suspicions fade a bit.
"Yeahhh I guess that's true."
Scratching at the scruff of his chin Boomstick broke away from the glare he was serving the gift and looked to Wiz whom had already turned his chair back around.
Mulling over his thoughts he couldn't help but feel like questioning Wiz just now was a small betrayal atleast from his own perspective.
"Hey."
By a miracle Boomstick had caught Wiz's attention and the scientist removed an ear bud and darted his eyes to his side in a tried anticipation.
"Sorry, Wiz."
Wiz's brows lifted in suprise. He looked just over his shoulder to see Boomstick with a guilty look on his face. The sight panicked Wiz enough for him to speak without thinking and with his voice slightly cracking.
"It's fine."
Now more content Boomstick looked back to his gift, it looking more tantalizing and shimmery then before.
Ready to pounce he nearly attacks the defenseless gift but stops himself in time to look to Wiz one more time.
"Ya don't wanna watch?"
"Nyope." Wiz said only slightly dismissive and with a loud *clack* of his mouse.
Though a bit disappointed Boomstick went back to his buisness and shrugged it off.
"Ah well."
Like a pup digging at the ground for a burried bone Boomstick rips in to the box tearing it apart and leaving behind a hollow mess and taters of shiny, red paper and white cardboard.
"Uhhh. Wiz?"
"Yeah."
Wiz absently answered Boomstick a little loudly trying to hear himself over the music in his ears.
"Wuzzthis?"
Boomstick had caught Wiz off guard by practically teleporting right next to him with a zip. He leans on the desk and pushes a canister he held in his palm a little too closely to Wiz's face.
"A thermos? I mean no complaints. I love a good mobile stew but uh..."
Boomstick lifts it up to his own eye again to ponder.
"It's kinda short."
Slightly disappointed, but unsurprised, in Boomstick's deductive skills he lifted the device from Boomstick's possession and uncapped it.
"I thought it was obvious."
Wiz turned the cylinder to reveal a series of buttons on it's opposite side and pressed the power button causing it to hum and lightly buzz.
"O-oh. Oh wow."
Boomstick picks up his new now apparent handjob machine and feels his cheeks burn a little.
"That's... way better then a thermos!"
Boomstick hopped and made the gesture as if his mind had been blown.
"But er. Why exactly did you..?"
"Wuddya mean why? You asked for one."
Any idea of this being a gag gift flew out from Boomstick's mind. He instead tried focusing on remembering when he asked Wiz for something like this.
"Ohhh"
Boomstick remembered the other day when recording the show with Wiz he had let slip how much he loved to get himself off. Something about wanting fast hands.
"Yeah. Yeah I guess I did!"
"And now, like you promised, I don't have to think about you getting hung up on another ex. Hell. Maybe now you can manage that labido and stop getting shitfaced after every rejection. 2 birds, 1 stone. It's called forethought. Y'know if you weren't constantly-"
"So you'd rather think of me jerking off?"
Boomstick interrupted Wiz with a sly look and wiggled his eyebrows.
"Shut up."
The emotion in Wiz's face died and so too in his tone. Boomstick however couldn't help but let out a guffaw and chuckle hard enough for his belly to jiggle.
Feeling a diffrent kind of excited now Boomstick swung his leg around and spun on his shotgun peg leg to face his chair and walk back to his workspace.
Feeling that warm and fuzzy giver's high Wiz turned back to his monitor to hide a grin and begun speaking just to hear himself talk.
"Yeah I mean you totally layed it on thick there during that last recording sesh with your "fast hands comment". It wouldn't take a genius like myself to know you were forcing in some hints y'know. Heheh."
Wiz continued.
"I thought of just buying something like it online but I figured it would be wayyy easier and faster to make one, which it totally was. I mean only dumb people buy things after all! And that jack off machine is LEAGUES better then whatever crap you could find some weeb onahole site. Y"know I-"
Just then Wiz heard the feint jingle of a belt buckle before a *fweesh* and *thud* against the floor causing him to swivel his chair around.
"What're yo-GAH!"
Wiz was subjected to the sight of Boomstick's t-shirt pulled behind his head and his pants dangling between the legs of his pale lower half. Boomstick's thick, uncut, cock and balls jiggled in time with his belly when he curiously looked back at Wiz.
Like his arms Boomstick was hairy all over with thick, dark brown hair covering his chest and legs only showing a hint of tame around his crotch where his pubes weren't exactly cut but had a half chopped look and evenly so, implying some grooming had been done semi-recently.
"OH MY GOD."
Wiz winced and quickly spun back around to his monitor feeling like he'd gag up a small ocean full of big fish. He spoke between the rollings of disgust that jumped up and down inside his chest and throat.
"I hate you so much."
Boomstick spoke with a chuckle in his voice and peeking canines.
"What? You expect me not to use this thing after you talking it up? Heheh. Nothin' you haven't seen before anyway!
Boomstick's nose wrinkled when he gave Wiz a toothy, sly smile that bit gently down on to his tongue. He placed his fists on his hips for a little hip thrust, flopping his junk to and fro, as if to taunt Wiz.
Despite the little-well, above average at best, show that Boomstick was flaunting; Wiz actually felt a little guilty having thought about kicking Boomstick out of the room and knowing full well the poor man was currently down a shack to sleep in let alone have the privacy to rub one out.
"Atleast point your buisness end AWAY from me please."
Wiz sighed for the umpteenth time that night and tried to smuther the image of his pal's junk with music and research. He thought of maybe correcting wiki articles or hacking twitter accounts. Thinking of such comforted him enough to zone out again and focus on his monitor.
Boomstick was getting busy with his pants and briefs laying on the floor and a new toy to hack.
WIP