The 'Not Again' Affair

"Illya?"

"Uhm?"

"Illya?"

"Oh for…. Napoleon…have mercy... let sleeping Russians lie…"

"That's sleeping dogs lie."

"I do not like dogs. Wake all of them up that you please. Just let me go back to sleep?"

tap...tap...tap...tap...tap

grumbling in Russian

"Fine…. fine…. I assume that the noise is not going to cease until you can manage to get to sleep. What is it tonight?"

"Do you dream?"

"Da. Of uninterrupted nights of sleep. Obviously a delusional hope. Do you?"

"I asked first."

"And I answered first. Perhaps not the answer you wanted, but an answer. You answer mine and I will give a more serious answer to yours. That will give me time to wake up to think."

"Fair enough, I suppose. I didn't used to dream so much, but I seem to be doing it more lately."

shuffling noise

"From your tone, I take it you are not dreaming of wine, women and song?"

"I wish. More like that night in the lake when you managed to get me to shore. Only in the dream, you weren't there."

"Ah…. with a tragic ending because of that?"

"Yes. I can think of a thousand ways I'd rather go than by drowning."

"Old age, shot by a jealous husband before you can get out of the window?"

chuckle

"Yes, something like that. So long as you weren't the jealous husband in the scenario."

"At least you know that I am a good shot."

"That's the problem. I know where you'd aim."

"True."

"It's not every night… but often enough. All 'what if' scenes on things we've lived through, but my brain keeps twisting them to where we don't live through them."

"We? You are not content to just kill off yourself in these dreams, but you have to drag me along as well? There is such a thing as too much togetherness, tovarich."

"It's not like I'm doing it intentionally, Illya. Alright. Your turn."

sigh

"I try very hard not to dream, tovarich. They haunt me as well, but not for the same reasons that yours do you."

shuffle

"Not sure I'm following you there, Illya."

"I am not sure how to explain it, Napoleon. It is like the dreams mock what I lose. I used to be able to dream of home, but I can no longer clearly picture it. Every year, more of it fades from my memories. It is a childish fear, but in the dreams, it seems that when the memories fade completely, I will fade away as well. As if I were never there."

"That's worse than mine."

"I was not competing."

"Hey… don't get mad. I know you weren't. So… you said you try not to. How do you manage that?"

"I cannot always do it, but I try to direct my thoughts toward an article I have read or a problem I have been trying to puzzle out. At least half of the time, my mind seems to cooperate. For the other half, I use.. well, this."

rustle

"What is this? A handkerchief for a mouse?"

"I suppose it could be, but no. Smell it."

"Is that vanilla?"

"Yes. Scent is a very powerful thing, Napoleon. Many memories can be stirred by the right scent. This one happens to be mine."

"Trust you to pick food to dream about."

"Beats drowning."

"True. Do you think something like that might work for me?"

"What could it hurt to try, tovarich? If it does not help you rest, you are no worse off than you are now."

"Hmm… I wonder what would work for me?"

"Hold on. I have an idea."

"What are you digging out of the bag?"

"A present I bought. April's birthday is next week. Mark invited us to a party he is giving her, remember?"

"No, I forgot. Thanks for the reminder. But what are you doing?"

"I do not think she will mind a drop or two going to an experiment. Here."

sniff

"That smells nice. Very nice. Definitely some rose tones in that."

"Perhaps that will help turn your thoughts to the ways you endanger your life between missions instead of during them."

"Endanger?"

"I have seen some of the women you have pursued. The word fits."

chuckle

"You may have a point. Well, only one way to see if this will work. Which, of course, is your goal. To get me to shut up and go to sleep."

"You know me so well."

"Good night, tovarich."

"Good night, Napoleon."