A/N: So, I've been playing Sly Cooper a lot lately, and I got inspired for a one shot. This led me to just start a collection of Sly one-shots. This one's short, so bear with me as I'm still getting the hang of writing one-shots for anything. Especially video-games. Enjoy!
Escape From The Antics
"Bently, I thought you said Carmelita was still in Mesa City!" I hissed into the mouth piece of my binoc-u-com. I was currently in New Zealand, in a bush, hiding from Carmelita Fox; the sexy police officer who has been after me for years.
"The tracker that I placed on her bazooka says she's in Mesa City!" Bently answered, slightly panicked that is technology failed him.
"Hey Cooper, I can hear you ya know." I turned around to see Carmelita pointing that infamous bazooka down at me.
"Ah, Carmelita, I thought you were tied up in that Muggshot case back in Utah." I stood up and leaned against my cane.
"They let me off for a more important one. Yours." She put her finger on the bazooka's trigger.
"Hey now, bazooka against wooden can ain't so fair if you ask me. At least gimme a moment…" I trailed off before hooking onto the nearest tree branch and swinging away from Carmelita.
"Get back here, Cooper! You belong behind bars!" I heard her yell just as I saw the bazooka shot fly past my tail.
I threw down a cap-mine and stood on a tree branch. As much as I hated doing this, I waited for Carmelita to be right on my cap, and slammed my cane down, causing the explosion that turned the tables… I had been to close and got blown into the trunk of the tree that I was in. I felt the metal cuffs close around my wrists and I closed my eyes.
When I opened my eyes again, I was in a jail cell; Carmelita had finally captured me. "Hey Fox!" I yelled out.
"What do you want, Raccoon?" Carmelita answered a few seconds before she came into view. She looked different from when she was out chasing me. Her hair was up and her bazooka was nowhere in sight.
"Where's my cane?" I demanded. "It's a family heirloom ya know!" I threw myself at the bars that kept me from escape. Escape from these antics.
"Right here. I can't keep this in my safe. It's too big. Since someone broke my other, bigger one!" She said in reference to my first break-in before starting my hunt for my family book; the Thievius Raccoonus. I got several pages from Raleigh the Frog, and Muggshot the Bulldog. The rest were in Haiti with Mz. Ruby, China with the Panda King, and the unknown location of Clockwerk.
"Hey, it was for my family. And you should be thanking me. I've stopped two big criminals for you. I only steal from criminals. Which is pretty much what you do." I reasoned.
"Nice try, Raccoon. But we give back what we take. Back to the rightful owners. Who'd your family steal this cane from anyway?" She asked sarcastically.
"No one. My great-great-great grandfather crafted it himself." I put my hand up to see if Carmelita took my cap away. Luck was on my side; she left it. I threw it down on the jail bars and backed up. I groaned when I remembered I didn't have my cane to trigger it.
"Interesting." She spun the cane in her hand, and I yelled. Causing the effect I'd hoped for; she dropped it. My hat exploded, sending metal bars flying. I used my uncle's dive and roll technique to get to my cane through the smoke. "COOPER!" Carmelita yelled angrily.
My fingers closed around my cane and I whirled around to pin Carmelita against the wall. "Looks like the shoe's on the other foot now, Fox. Listen, why don't I take you out for dinner, and you call off the charges?" I winked.
"No way, Cooper. You've been on the run way too long, and you've stolen too much stuff for me to just call off the charges." Carmelita struggled against my cane, but it was too strong. "Where you gonna go from here, Raccoon? Guards are stationed everywhere, and you don't have your backpack." She raised her eyebrows as if she'd just won this argument.
"Well…" I trailed off as I used my cousin's page of the Raccoonus; invisibility. I ran down to Carmelita's office. My binoc-u-com was sitting next to the safe, so I grabbed it and called to Bently. "Bently, do you know the combo for Carmelita's new safe?" I whispered into the mouth piece.
"Sly? You're alright!" Bently and Murray cheered. "Give me a second… Try putting in eight-zero-three!" Bently said confidently.
I put in the combination and sure enough, the vault swung open. My backpack, supply of cap-mines, and computer hacking keypad were lying right there. I slung my backpack over my shoulder, put the keypad in its pocket, put my extra cap-mine on, and went invisible again just as Carmelita came in. "Cooper, I know you're in here!" I decided to be daring and get closer to her. She opened the window and glanced in both directions. I tiptoed over and got in her face. Knowing I'd never have another chance like this, I planted a kiss on her lips. "RACCOON!" She yelled as I ran down the building's fire escape.
"Sorry Carmelita! I don't belong behind bars!" I called as the invisibility wore off. I dove out of the way of a bazooka shot, and heard the familiar tire screech of the Hideout. I dove in the back doors, and slammed them shut. "Thanks Murray! But how'd you know I was out?"
"Your binoc-u-com of course." Bently said. "It keeps tabs on your location. You're the master thief, we're the safety team."
"Well, we need to law. For awhile. Carmelita is pissed about me getting away." I took my cap off and put my backpack and cane down.
"And we've found the perfect location. How's about we go visit Mz. Ruby, down in Haiti?" Bently said mischievously.
"Bently… I love the way you think." I smiled.