This is a collection of short chapters (about 1,000 words each) that should update weekly. M for "adult" content (lots-o-smut). Just a reminder that this is a drama.

-FS13-

Elsa looks about the room nervously, surveying the numerous sets of eyes curiously fixed on her as she struggles to continue with her introduction. The others don't know her yet and probably think she's just very quiet or shy. What they don't know is that Elsa is the kind of woman who takes her time to carefully select her words; never rushing into anything, especially private information about herself. Something like this has to be given a great deal of thought and she won't allow her eloquence to abandon her, even if what she has to say would be deemed deplorable by anyone else. She knows the circle of women in the room are one of her and takes relief in knowing they're not judging her; simply waiting to hear her story, or as much of it that has unfolded.

When the fluttering of nerves settle enough to hear her own thoughts again, Elsa steadies her breath and continues with as much grace as one can under these circumstances.

"I'm here tonight because…" Pausing to toy with her hands because she still doesn't know quite how to word it. Her thoughts draw inward again and she can picture his face so perfectly, the corner of her lips curling as the revived fluttering in her stomach shifts from anxious to something just shy of giddy. She's amazed at how he continues to have this affect on her. "I'm in love with a man- an incredible man- who makes me feel like I've never felt before." And she means with all of her heart, they can see the sincerity reflecting in her mirthful expression.

Elsa sits and thinks on that, about how he can so easily peel her out of her boardroom suit and turn her into a quivering mess in hardly any time at all. And yet he still feels like her best friend. He understands her like no one else ever has and she can't even recall a time when she couldn't confide her deepest thoughts to him. Having someone so special makes her smile all the more, now beaming like a lantern as she stares at her hands folded primly in her lap. It's not just the sex, she's certain of that, and the others seem to get that from her solemn tone. Elsa wouldn't risk so much for something so meaningless as casual sex.

"He's extremely intelligent. Very kind. Sometimes has a bit of an ego," laughing to herself through her nose at all the times they've butted heads before she proceeds. "He's handsome, a great listener," continuing to list off his best attributes, until the cheerfulness on her face freezes, lips slowly dipping into a small frown as the truth fizzles to the top of her list. "... and he's married." Once she says it, the pang of sadness cuts in an all too familiar way, but it's the statement they all knew was coming. She wouldn't be there otherwise.

The crushing truth yanks Elsa back into reality and everyone can see the shift in her body language, encompassing a seriousness that slashes through her once joyful visage.

"I came here tonight because I'm a logical person. I'm the last woman to do something like this. A part of me knows that what I'm doing is wrong. I know I shouldn't be this happy with him or this accepting of such a relationship. And I think I need help." The bluest eyes glance up at the only woman in the room who hasn't had an affair, and she can see the bewilderment welling up in those vibrant orbs.

"What's his name?" The therapist asks, worry quickly splashing across Elsa's tensing features. "Remember, everything here is confidential. I only ask because using his name will help you stay more connected to your experience."

And help is exactly what Elsa came for.

"Hans. His name is Hans," she replies reluctantly but the name brings a smile to her lips and colors her cheeks nonetheless.

"And how did you first meet Hans? Take us back to where this all started."

Elsa's mind drifts back in time to that fateful day Hans came into her life and flipped it upside down the second he shook her hand.

"I met him at my office…"

A sense of danger slithers under Elsa's skin as she speaks, because she hasn't told a single soul about her indiscretions. It's a secret she carries, every torrid moment and promise made has only been to her and Hans' privy.

"I know somewhere in my mind that I shouldn't be doing this. That I shouldn't be involved with- sleeping with- a married man. I do feel guilty sometimes. I think about her," never saying his wife's name because doesn't even know it. She doesn't want to know it and Hans has made it a point to never say it. "I feel incredibly guilty but it's not enough to stop myself."

The reactions from the group members are mixed. Most of them know exactly what it's like to be in Elsa's situation, blinded by love and desperately holding on to the beautiful promises whispered into her ear every time he's with her. But this is the first woman they've had join them before the devastating end of a relation that began with lies and deceit.

Their in shock because it's like they're watching Elsa stand on the railroad tracks and she doesn't even hear nor see the train hurtling towards her at a hundred miles an hour. It doesn't matter how wonderful this man is or how much he says he loves her. The chance of Elsa having a happy ending is basically slim to nil. The heartbreaking part is that they know they can't convince her of her fate. They know she won't listen. All they can do it watch and bare witness to the train wreck that is about to become her life. And in the end, they'll be there for her. Elsa doesn't know the alienation she'll face if she tells anyone about the affair, but every single woman in the room silently promises to catch her when she eventually falls.

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