Kisame

"Up."

Kisame looked at the petite pink haired girl standing in front of him in silence. What did that mean?

"Up!" she insisted, reaching her arms upwards in his direction.

"What?" Kisame asked after an awkward moment.

"I want you to pick me up!" She clarified, wiggling her arms in impatience.

"What for?" he was, by now, quite puzzled.

"I'm tired! Pick me up and carry me!" Sakura huffed. They had been walking for a while, but that did not rationalize him carrying her. She was Akatsuki just like him, ninja of their caliber did not tire after a few hours of walking.

"What the hell kind of crazy are you speaking? You don't need to be carried and I'm not your pack mule. Walk your damn self!" He scoffed, continuing to stride right past the now pouting pinkette.

"Kisa-koi!" she called in protest, a special nickname she reserved for when they were alone. She knew it drove him crazy for affection.

"Don't start with that." he warned, quickening his pace. "We are on a mission."

His girlfriend usually got her way, but he would be damned if he gave in without a fight.

~(o)(O)(o)~

"I'll breach the basement with a earth release jutsu while you're taking care of the security along the eastern wall. There are no guards inside so the fortress should only take five minutes to traverse. I can grab the old bastard and meet you about-"

BAM!

The wall to their left exploded in a violent detonation. The group of scrupulous criminals barely escaped the falling debris, their meeting effectively disbarred.

"What the fuck?" their leader shouted, alarmed that they were under attack in their own supposedly secret lair.

"Hey there! Akatsuki's here to play! We hear you're planning to attack the Rain Daimyō. Gotta tell ya, that's a bad idea see? We Akatsuki depend on him for certain privileges soooo...can't let you carry out your plans. Sorry!" a female voice chimed cheerfully.

….silence permeated the room, Akatsuki staring down the criminals and the criminals looking back at the two Akatsuki.

"Um...so are we good? You'll cancel your plans? Cuz it would really suck to have to kill you. We're both wearing new cloaks and would kinda like to keep them clean for at least a few days."

...more silence...

"Uh...are we supposed to be intimidated?" One of the lackeys asked his boss, who shot him a glare. Realizing he was likely losing face in front of his followers the leader straightened his posture and struck an offensive pose.

"Listen here, we're not going to listen to some fake-ass Akatsuki! Get the fuck out of here and tell whoever hired you that the Daimyō is our target and aint' no rival gangs going to horn in on our bounty!" he bellowed.

"What makes you think we aren't Akatsuki?" the tall one growled, tilting the sugegasa so that his face and blue complexion was revealed.

"Shit!" one of the lackeys screamed "They're for real!"

Another fainted.

The leader was visibly shaking in his sandals. "Uh..." he stuttered..."Well...um..."

"Speak up! We can't hear you!" it was the female's voice again.

"Well...it's just that you're...you're so small...and polite...and casually sitting on him...that's not Akatsuki badass." the leader admitted, fully expecting to get his ass kicked by the giant man with what appeared to be a child on his shoulder.

To the criminal's surprise instead of launching an attack the two immediately began to bicker.

"You see? I told you to get down before we got here! It's not professional!"

"Oh please, like we should care what some third rate, garbage gang, Chūnin level bullies think of us!"

"It doesn't matter what they think, it matters what they say! Rumors spread you know, we have a reputation to uphold and should maintain appearances!"

"We're likely going to have to kill them anyway so again, who cares?!"

"I care! You know what Hidan said to me the other day? He asked how it felt to constantly have a hook in my cheek! They all think I'm pussy whipped!"

"Hidan's an asshole, you shouldn't listen to anything he says. Besides, we both know how much you love it when we play that game." she teased, running her hand long the muscular shoulder she wasn't occupying.

"Great, now we're really going to have to kill all these guys...Yeah I like it, but it's another thing to publicize it! I'm not some damn exhibitionist!"

"Is my Kisa-koi shy about how much he likes being of service?" Sakura cooed.

"Stop! I can't get into a killing mood if you give me a boner!"

In his deep distraction Kisame almost didn't notice the group of criminals try to sneak away. The shark nin made quick work of them, disabling those closest to escape by simply but effectively cutting their legs off with Shamehada.

"Nobody leaves this room!" he demanded, ignoring the dying groans of those quickly bleeding out at his feet. There were a few men huddled in the corner but the leader was the only one still standing out in the open, likely because he was frozen in fear.

Kisame felt a feminine hand sift through his hair. Kami, she knew what that did to him, why was she teasing so much? Next Sakura's fingernails gently scratched his scalp before grabbing hair and forcing his head to tilt away from her. A second later he felt her hot breath in his ear, blowing sensually.

"Make Mama proud." she ordered, slipping gracefully from his shoulder to give him some fighting room.

~(o)(O)(o)~

"I don't see why I have to wash yours too." Kisame grumbled, standing at the sink, scrubbing at the blood stains all along the bottom hem of Sakura's cloak. If she wasn't so damn short the hem wouldn't drag, or she could have just avoided the puddles of blood.

"You didn't listen. That blonde snuck up and if I weren't there he would have stabbed you in the lower back."

"Yeah but you were there and he didn't stab me so again, why am I washing your cloak?"

"Punishment." Sakura simply stated. She was laying in bed on her stomach, reading a magazine while idly kicking her feet.

"This is some bullshit." he muttered, scrubbing harder in effort to work out his frustrations.

It wasn't until fifteen minutes of sulking had passed that Kisame felt his petite girlfriend slide up behind him, pressing her body against his ass. She grabbed a cheek in each hand and gave a nice squeeze before speaking.

"When you're done here I want you on the bed, naked and on your knees. You get one more chance to make Mama proud, be thankful Kisa-koi."

"...Thank you Mistress."