A/N So I wrote this a long time ago, just didn't post it on here. This was supposed to be a two shot...but then people persuaded me to make it into a fic. So here's the first post, I'll probably post the second part later...then I'll post the post I'm working on now after that. Anyways, R/R, and enjoy!

August 2003

Ryan Atwood looks at the house around him. It's only light was the illuminations from the moon outside. It wasn't enough though, so he walked over to get a couple of candles, passing the boom box on his way. He stopped and stared at it. Maybe some music would help him in his loneliness.

So he pressed the play button. The soft melody of Jeff Buckley's guitar started playing softly, filling the room. He looked down, making out the form of the CD case. The Model Home Mix. He pressed the repeat button on the boom box, and then turned back to get some candles.

When he had most of the room lit up, he started packing his stuff. He let his mind drift away when he saw the Model Home Mix CD. Drift away to earlier today, and this past week in Newport.

He thought of all the fun he'd had and the friends he'd made. The people he'd grown attached to. The Cohens, Marissa, Seth…..he'd miss them all. He really didn't want to go to Texas. He wanted the Cohens to change their minds and tell him they wanted him to stay with them. Life would be so much easier then.

He heard a noise and looked up, met with a pair of blue eyes. It was Marissa, the one person he'd been dying to see, yet dreading to see at the same time. It would be hard to say goodbye. He had feelings for her that came fast and were unexpected. Deep, meaningful feelings. "I thought you were with Luke." He said, looking away.

"I was." She said. She took a step closer to him. "I don't know why I'm here, I just had to see you." She looked at him as he stood up, trying to read his face. He wouldn't let her though, he was leaving tomorrow. They couldn't get too attached. "I mean you're leaving tomorrow…what if I never….we never…maybe I could spend the night." She suggested, hope in her eyes. "Hang out."

But he knew what she meant by her words. Nothing good could come of this. Despite his feelings, despite her beautiful face and angelic features, he turned the other way, avoiding her gaze. "You can't stay, because if you stay…if you spend the night, I don't know if I'd be able to leave."

"Then don't." she pleaded, taking a step closer to him. He backed up again though.

"And what? When you go back to school in the fall, I do what? Hide here, like some ghost, the cops find me, and I have to disappear again?" He looks down and says the bitter truth. "We're from different worlds."

She took a step closer though, "That's not true."

"I'm not like you…" he continued. She was trembling and he just wanted to take her into his arms and hold her. Hold her the way Luke should have been holding her, not some freshman. "Go, please…Go." He said, facing the wall.

She didn't take no for an answer though, and came up behind him. "Please, Ryan, I…" But he can't take it any longer and he turns to look at her. Tears were streaming down her cheeks, and he feels his heart break. "Please…." She pleads once more, taking one of his hands in both of hers.

Despite the sparks flying through his hand and up his arm, he said, "But tomorrow…" But she shakes her head.

"We'll deal with tomorrow, tomorrow." She whispers. She still has his hand in hers, and lifts it up to her lips, kissing his fingers one by one. He shuts his eyes and tries to make sure it isn't a dream. He opens them again and she's staring at him.

"Okay." he finally says in a barely a whisper. He takes his hand that she's holding and puts it on the side of her face. "Okay," he repeats, louder this time. He uses his other hand and moves a stray piece of hair behind her ear.

She smiles shyly at him, and he notices her lips begin to quiver. He leans in, and captures her lips with his own. Her soft lips against his feels like the most amazing thing he'd ever experience, and he deepens the kiss, urging his tongue into her mouth. She massages his with her own.

He moves one of his hands through her hair, and she softly moans. The sound is the best thing he's ever heard, and he takes her with him into the tent. They let their hands roam each other's bodies, savoring the feeling of each other. She moves to remove his shirt, and they throw it to the side of the tent, not paying any attention where it lands.

She ran her hands over his bare chest and over his six pack. He moved to remove her shirt also, throwing it over to where his own was. He kissed down her neck and to her collarbone. She started running her hands through his hair and he moved further down her body to her chest, unclasping her bra and throwing it to the side.

He kissed down her stomach, and unbuttoned her pants, sliding them off of her. He moved his mouth back up her body, connecting it with hers. He let his hands wander all over her body, touching her in the most intimate places. They finished shredding off their remaining clothes, and he grabbed a condom.

He situated himself over her and Marissa looked at him expectantly. With a husky voice he asked her, "Are you sure you're ready for this?"

She kissed him long and tender on the lips and says, "I've never been more sure of anything in my life." He soon entered her, making their bodies one and they made love deep into the night, not once thinking of what morning would bring them or that in a few hours he'd be leaving to be hundreds of miles away from her.

The next morning, Ryan awoke with a sleeping Marissa snuggled against his naked body. He looked down at her, watching her eyes flutter every few minutes, signaling that she was dreaming. He smiled at her, and ran his hand over her cheek and through her hair. He leaned down and kissed her neck, making sure he didn't wake her though.

He watched her for another five minutes, taking in her beauty. He finally got up and found his clothes and got dressed. He got all his stuff together, and packed his remaining stuff that he didn't get to last night. He went back to the tent, and looked at Marissa, debating whether to wake her or not. In the end, he decided that it was probably better for the both of them if he just left and never looked back, despite the amazing night they'd had together.

He sighed and found a piece of paper and a pen to write her a note. He put the piece of paper up against the wall and wrote…

Dear Marissa,

Last night was amazing, and I wouldn't trade it in for anything, but I need to go to Texas and find my mom's ex boyfriend. I know you don't understand now, but I'm hoping that someday you will understand why I have to do this. And even though it probably hurts now, we'll get over it and find someone better. You'll find someone better, because you deserve better than me, I know you do.

So I'm gonna go, please forgive me for not waking you up. I just wouldn't be able to say goodbye to your face, especially after last night. So I guess this is the end for us, but who knows….maybe we'll see each other again someday.

Ryan

P.S. Have a great life

He folded up the piece of paper, and put it in the tent by Marissa. He kissed her forehead once more, letting his lips linger, knowing this was probably the last time he'd ever see her. He finally pulled back, and tried not to cry. He didn't know why he was so emotional, she was just some girl, right. But he knew she wasn't, she was special, and he'd never forget her.

He grabbed the ticket that Seth had left for him last night and grabbed his bag and left the house. He walked to the bus station that wasn't that far away, and got on the bus to Austin. As he watched Newport pass him by, he just had one thought….

Would he ever see Marissa Cooper again?