Gandalf Needs a Staff!

Author's Note: This fanfic that I wrote that focuses on Gandalf losing his staff, is due to while watching the movies, I noticed that while Saruman swipes Gandalf's staff from him in the tower of Orthanc and you don't see him retrieve it in any way in the movie, though he has it in Rivendell is an inconsistency that I decided to write and expand upon.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters that were derived from Tolkien's genius mind but I can mess around with them *smiles slyly*. Also any snide remarks directed at a certain director with the initials P.J. are all out of playful respect for the wonderful films that he managed to produce.

Gandalf Needs a Staff

Just before Gandalf and all the other elves set off to leave over the seas to Valinor, they decided to share their most embarrassing stories. They started to debate when, after coming out from a huddle, the hobbits Merry, Pippin, Sam and Frodo all simultaneously shouted, "Have Gandalf go first!" The elves Galadriel and Elrond looked pointedly at the wizard as though that ended the conversation.

'So I will let them have what they want,' Gandalf snickered inwardly. 'I will tell them a tale that shouldn't even exist but for an oversight of a specific negligible director.'

"A moth lazily flew on the high smoky breeze above Orthanc, when I reached out and grabbed it.

"'Hey what are you doing on top of Orthanc Tower? And why must you be so rude snatching me out of the air like that?' the moth's antenna vibrated at the wizard.

At this Pippin started to ask some nonsensical questions of which only some are answered here (the rest involving the delicate matter of the birds and the bees.) "Yes moth's communicate by vibrating antenna. No they do not do those ridiculous dances that bees do to communicate and no they most certainly don't make flashy yellow and black flowers that can guide airplanes to land. Now stop with all these foolish questions Took, or I shall toss you into the sea."

"Mmmhmm... now I hummed at the moth." This time Merry opened his mouth to start querying him but closed it quickly noticing the stern look on Gandalf's face. Pippin may have tried to ask something but he was in a state of shock from some of the answers to some of the aforementioned questions. "I hummed to the moth that it should mind its own business as to why I was on top of Orthanc (the matter was still rather embarrassing at the time) and to deliver a message to the King of Eagles."

"'Tell your Lord that his friend is once again in need but this time he has no trick up his sleeve. He will understand.'"

"'OK there, but I demand compensation for this,' the moth insisted."

"'What way is there that I can repay you,' I inquired, intrigued."

"'Well... how about you give me a small shot in the last film. Nothing to big mind just me floating by in the midst of a battle. Sound fair?'"

"Knowing that I had some serious wheedling with Peter ahead I reluctantly agreed. I sent the moth on his way. Then came the night where Saruman returned to the top to see me and only brought his staff with him. It was that night that the moth floated by, vibrating that he had met up with Pete by smashing into his helicopter trying to shoot aerial coverage of the mountains, whom agreed to let the moth have a part in the Return of the King."

"'The King of all winged beasts will be here any second so pretend to plummet to your death to build suspense,' he finished and left. With those words ringing in my ears and did the unthinkable, plunging myself off the tower."

"Gwaihir caught me at the last second that jerk who always ruffles his feathers like he's a peacock...grumble... well anyway, I told him to take me to Edoras, thankfully before he managed to get into this major rant about how he always has to save my ass from situations which started with my so called 'meddling'.

"Finally after hours of this the ride was over and we landed in Edoras. There I watched him circle away unknowing that he was to be the least of my problems in this fanfiction."

Hope you enjoyed this part of my fanfic and look forward to part 2. I know I do. R&R.