After all these years, Mrs. Claus decided enough was enough. She was filing a divorce with Santa. It wasn't really him. Old Nick was nice enough, it was just he was always away. Always working. Spending more time by the beds of children he didn't even know than by hers. It would be Christmas, a romantic, giving holiday, and she wouldn't see him at all. He was work-obsessed. And it hurt her. It hurt her that when they talked that a phone call from the department deserved his attention more than she did. It hurt her that they never went out together anymore unless it was too scope out the best places for the sleigh to land. It hurt her that it would be late at night and she'd role over to hug him and he'd be gone. And that was why she started seeing the Tooth Fairy, Felicia. It started innocent enough. They talked together when Nick was away. She could vent to Felicia. She could let herself go. That was why, when after the both of them had had too much eggnog and were sitting under the mistletoe, she wasn't alarmed when Felicia pressed into her with a kiss. She wasn't alarmed when Felicia removed her glasses and red jacket. She wasn't alarmed when 'twas the night before Christmas and creatures were stirring in Mrs. Claus's bedroom. Creatures that weren't mice. Mrs. Claus was relieved. This gave her an excuse. An excuse to leave Nick and his sorry ass behind. Sure he would mope about it, gain the sympathy of the elves of how she ruined his Christmas. The elves were always on his side. Always kissing his ass. Well she was done with that. Wasn't she the one who baked his cookies, did the chores, took care of the fucking reindeer? And the reindeer were such lousy fucks. So arrogant. Especially Rudolph, who would shine his nose in her face as a joke. He even commissioned a stupid song that he used as blackmail for the other reindeer. Used to laugh and call him names indeed. Just 'cause he had a bright nose he thought he was special. Yeah, real special. She could make it redder if he wanted, all right. Cut the fucking thing off and let him bleed. Then the snow could be red too. She rolled over and hugged Felicia. Sure Felicia was a little young for her, in her 30s, but she was kind and had great dental hygiene. Plus who knows how many kids Santa gave presents too that were from a different kind of sack? She had her right, dammit. She had her fucking right. Felicia fluttered her wings together in her sleep and it tickled Felicia's face. Mrs. Clause smiled and kissed the nape of her back. Suddenly the door banged open. It was Nick. His face wore a mask of emotion she couldn't describe…