So this one takes place after that one episode where Jean and Scott attempt to teach the New Recruits... I forgot the name of the episode, though. Sorry. ;)

Also, this is primarily a FAMILY fic. Yes, I do realize that the X-Men are not related, but it probably would have been under a "Feel Good" or "Team Bonding" section if they had those. Anyways, it's a feel-good kinda fic, and if you're looking for pure humor, I recommend my story, "Cookin' with the Blob." LOL. ;)

And a side note: This story contains mild Oprah and Cyclops bashing. So if you like Oprah and/or Cyclops, this fic might not be for you. It's a fair warning. Oh yeah, and there is a joke about Southerners and snoring. So if you're going to be offended by any one of these things, please don't take it out on me in reviews. Flames not involving any of the above items are welcome, but I like nice comments better. ;)

And yes, I realize that some sentences are run-ons. Oh well. ;)

More chapters to come... They're already written, I just have to type 'em up. But you can have the first two for now. ;)

Inspiration for portions of this story go to Midwich Cuckoo for their story "Omega Bobby"

Disclaimers:

I don't own...

X-Men: Evolution

Oprah

Oprah's website

Invader Zim

Chips Ahoy

Man vs. Wild

Survivorman

Spaghetti-O's

Slurpee

Prologue

"Since everybody here already knows how well our last attempt at a lesson went, today we are going to try something a little different." Jean stood at the front of the make-shift, underground classroom next to Scott. "Today you will each tells us a little bit about yourselves using these worksheets."

Jamie cautiously raised his hand. "Is this a test?"

Bobby, who had previously been occupying his class time by staring at Jubilee, sat upright in his chair with a jolt. "Test? Nobody told me we had a test today!" He looked around the room frantically. "Dude, I didn't study!" Bobby punched Sam, who was sitting next to him, to wake the only Southerner he knew that didn't snore from his short-lived slumber. "Dude!" Bobby shouted at Sam. "Did you know that we have a test today?"

"What? A test?" Sam asked, panicking more about the likely fact that Rahne and Amara had seen him drool while he slept than the information he had just received from Bobby. "I didn't study!"

"Me either!"

"Bobby, Sam, calm down!" Scott shouted. He pinched the bridge of his nose as best as he could with his glasses on. Sighing in frustration, he turned toward Jamie. "No, Jamie. To answer your question, this is not a test."

Bobby and Sam sighed audibly, sinking in their chairs with relief. "Does this count as a grade of any type?" Bobby inquired.

Scott sighed dramatically. "No, Bobby. This does not count as a grade of any type." Bobby and Sam sunk lower into their chairs. Seeing that the class in front of him was now silent, Scott straightened and announced proudly, "These questions came directly from Oprah's website, so I'm positive that they'll be great for getting to know each other and having a good foundation for our relationship as friends and as future teammates."

The class was silent for a few seconds, staring at Scott. Then, all at once, the New Recruits burst out laughing. "HA!" Bobby shouted. "Scott watches Oprah!"

"What?" Scott asked, looking around the room of laughing mutants. "No, I said I got it from Oprah's website!" he said, trying to defend himself and failing miserably. Getting angry, he shouted, "Just take your worksheets!"

Slowly, the class settled down and stopped wiping tears of laughter from their eyes. Jean and Scott then proceeded to pass out the Oprah-approved worksheets to the New Recruits.

Reluctantly and unusually silent, the New Recruits set to work on their worksheets. Thirty minutes later, the clock's hand reached the three, and the New Recruits turned in their papers, leaving Jean and Scott to their metallic classroom.

Sighing, Jean and Scott silently started to skim over the mess of papers the New Recruits had left them.