Another fic... this time it's a Raine pairing. I whore Rachel around something terrible, don't I? I don't own Glee or any of the songs used in this fic.
It's Been a Long Time
What was she doing here? Rachel Berry did not belong in this little bar. She had a dream (and a hobby of shoving said dream down peoples' throats) to be on Broadway. While this was in fact New York, Carlie's was degrading to Broadway in every which way. He kind of panicked a little as well, because sometimes the guys who came into the bar were a little shady (upon numerous times, he had to be the hero to some of the girls; he hated when guys didn't understand the word no) and he didn't want anything to happen to her.
It didn't register for a few minutes that it was a little creepy for him to be staring at her, but he couldn't help it. He tried to make his staring a little less obvious as he was now singing mindlessly. The only thing on his mind was the last day that he had saw her, the day he did something he never typically would. He ran away from his problems and he didn't ever come back.
"Rachel, I can't do this to him."
He watched as her face contorted to a confused look,"What on Earth are you talking about, Blaine?"
"Kurt. I don't love him, and I can't keep leading him on," he said, pausing to sigh, "But I can't hurt him by breaking up with him, either."
Rachel's face softened, and she studied him with soft eyes. She placed a delicate hand on top of his own and gently caressed the top of his hand with her thumb. Overall, Rachel was a soft person, except for the occasional time when she went all Rachelsaurus Rex on everyone. Oh shit, what if she did just that and told Kurt herself, "Now yes. I do consider Kurt to be one of my best friends and while yes, I do like seeing him happy... however over these past few years I consider you to be a 'best' friend as well and I want to see you happy. I may be naive, but I'm not completely stupid. I've known this whole time that you didn't love him, but I didn't say anything because at the beginning you guys were at least happy. I think you should just sit down and talk to him, just tell him how you feel. Or sing him a song, singing is definitely one of your strong points."
She was still rubbing his hand as she popped a baby carrot into her mouth, "I dunno Rach... I don't think I can."
Cue hand through hair motion as he stared at her. She really had some of the softest thumbs ever, as his mind started to wander if she was this soft everywhere. And then he mentally slapped himself, remembering that his wandering mind was what really made him doubt his love for Kurt and even question his sexuality because Rachel was just damn gorgeous and absolutely stunning.
She munched her carrot before looking down at her watch, a little bit of a chaotic look traveling into her eyes, "This is really inconvenient, and I'd really love to stay and make sure you get this one hundred percent worked out but I have a dinner date with Finn... you know how he gets."
Blaine could have been sure he saw sadness glimmer through her eyes as she gave Blaine one last smile after mentioning how Finn "got." And yeah, he understood what she meant. Finn had started acting a little weird around Blaine recently, but he wasn't like that around Kurt so he knew it wasn't homophobia. He actually had started to wonder if Finn knew about the feelings that Blaine was starting to notice for Rachel, that there was a reason he started hanging around more and talking to Rachel more than his own boyfriend.
"Yeah, thanks Rachel. See ya around," waving with his free hand before she took hers off his.
That was supposed to be a lie, he knew what he had to do that would take this off his shoulders and everyone would win. He would do something he typically would never do. He packed his bags and left. Didn't say goodbye, not to Kurt, not to his family, not to her, he just left.
And then here he was in Carlie's as a nightly singer. It didn't pay much, but he got a free room in the rooms on the top of the bar and free dinners, so he had pretty much been saving every penny possible so he could get a nicer place. But the place kind of grew on him. But if she was attending now, he wasn't sure he could stay. Though maybe Rachel Berry didn't realize it was him, after all, she had admitted she was a bit naive.
He squinted, seeing her sipping slowly on a pink drink. Alcohol? He was pretty sure after that night with the Glee club she swore she was never going to drink agan... that was also the night she kissed him. Thinking about that night, a blush unknowingly crept up his cheeks. And then out of no where, she looked him dead in the eyes. And he knew then that she knew who he was now. He blinked, and in a moment, she was gone.
So he kept singing. A slower song, something soft. Something he didn't have to think about to sing because his mind was elsewhere, like where Rachel Berry went. He looked down, and there she was, staring at him wth watery brown eyes. Mental face palm, he didn't want her to cry. He knew he had hurt her, wasn't that enough guilt? Apparently not, because she was crying. She softly swayed to the music, looking at him straight in the eyes the whole time. And then it was time to switch songs again.
"Sunday morning rain is falling
Steal some covers share some skin
Clouds are shrouding us in moments unforgettable
You twist to fit the mold that I am in
But things just get so crazy living life gets hard to do
And I would gladly hit the road get up and go if I knew
That someday it would bring me back to you
That someday it would bring me back to you
That may be all I need
In darkness she is all I see
Come and rest your bones with me
Driving slow on sunday morning
And I never want to leave
Fingers trace your every outline
Paint a picture with my hands
Back and forth we sway like branches in a storm
Change the weather still together when it ends
That may be all I need
In darkness she is all I see
Come and rest your bones with me
Driving slow on Sunday morning
And I never want to leave
But things just get so crazy living life gets hard to do
Sunday morning rain is falling and I'm calling out to you
Singing someday it'll bring me back to you
Find a way to bring myself home to you
And you may not know
That may be all I need
In darkness she is all I see
Come and rest your bones with me
Driving slow."
Looking up at the clock, he realized his shift was over. He bid the crowd a good night and waved to Shaylene as he exited the stage and she entered. He was greeted at the bar by being tackled, though it wasn't like he didn't know who had committed the act. After the tackle, she punched him square in the jaw, "What the hell do you think you're doing here? Why the fuck did you disappear? You left everyone and no one knew where you were or where you would go if you decided to run away from home. We were so worried about you, you, you, you, you, you, IDIOT!"
Nice to see you again, Rachelsaurus Rex.
"Look, Rachel. I would really love to have this talk with you but could you refrain from punching me in my work place? I would not appreciate losing my job," he told her, looking at her again, before looking at the bartender, "Another cosmo for the lady, I'll take what I usually have, Priscilla."
The busty blonde nodded her head, fixing up the drinks, and he took a long sip of his own, watching Rachel be extremely dainty with her own sips. It was then that it registered in his head that she didn't like alcohol, she was just trying to fit in, as usual, he smiled at her, showing off his white teeth, "You don't have to drink that, you know... I won't mind."
So she put it down,"Can we talk now?"
"I'm sorry."
"You know, about your leaving and stuff..?"
"I meant, I'm sorry. For leaving, not that I didn't understand,"he told her, looking into his beverage of choice instead of her, "I just had to leave. For the first time in my life I didn't know what do, the only thing I could think of was to run and never come back."
"Don't you think that you hurt Kurt more by leaving and never saying good bye than you would have if you just broke up with him?"
"I know it wouldn't have... because the reason I wanted to break up with him would have completely shattered him," he said, taking another large swig, "I'm not gay, Rachel."
"But you told me... One hundred percent gay."
"I thought I was, but someone I met and grew to know changed that. But I knew that if Kurt ever found out he would have thought our whole relationship was a lie, even though it wasn't."
"What do you think he thought when you just disappeared?"
"Dammit, Rachel. You honestly think I don't know that I hurt him beyond belief? That's why I left so he wouldn't ever have to see me again in the first place, so no one would see me again. Why did you come here?" It was a random question, but he was curious to know, not that he was trying to change the subject at all.
He could feel her eyes burning holes in his shoulder as he looked at his drink deeply, "About a year after you left, I hired a private investigator to find you. It took him another year to finally find you and now here we are. It cost me a lot of money and it lost me Finn, but you left me with so many questions. I wanted to stay in that little cafe with you and really work everything out. Finn flipped a shit when he even found out that I was with you alone."
"He honestly thought that I would do something to you while you were dating?"
"You'd ever do something to me?"
"I have kissed you before, don't you remember, Rachel?"
He watched her again as she placed her fingers to her lips softly,"Yeah."
"I think he knew..."
"Knew what?"
"Nothing, never mind." he said plainly, thinking "That I loved you, still love you" to himself, "Look, Rachel. I appreciate the thoughtfulness, but you need to go back and be with Finn, make things right."
Her eyebrows came together as she shook her head, "You know, I didn't love him."
"Why not?"
And she was crying again. Way to go, idiot. She sat like that for a few minutes and he didn't even know what to do, he didn't even attempt to comfort her, and then finally, she stopped crying, "He was too controlling. Trying to tell me who I could and couldn't hang out with alone, places I could go, things I could do. It was especially bad if I told him I were going to be with you. It was like he thought we were going to run off and elope the moment he turned his back."
He nodded a quick nod and yawned, "Rach... I've really enjoyed seeing you again, I have. But you can't come here anymore. You need to leave, I'm going to bed."
"I didn't bring enough money for anything else but the ride here and some food, I was either going to make you come back with me or let me stay with you," she blurted out, quickly. Panic in her eyes and a blush on her cheeks, he realized she didn't think it would turn out this way.
He sighed and ran his fingers through his gel-free hair, something he had stopped when he left, "You can stay with me until you can contact you to send you some money to go back to Lima."
Her eyes lit up and he wished he could always make her look so happy, "This way." He motioned with his hands as they took off up the stairs. The higher they were, the more the music drowned out and it would be an understatement if the walk to his room wasn't considered awkward. He opened the door when they reached it and he held it open for her, "And here we are. It isn't much, but it's free so I'm not complaining."
It was small. There was a tiny kitchen-dining room area, a tiny living room, a bathroom, a mini washer and dryer, and a bedroom. Perfect sized for one, only a little bit tight with two people. It was weirdly clean, but Blaine really didn't spend much time in any other place of the house except for the couch and the toilet. Yeah, he had a bed but he typically just crashed on the couch; he didn't like sleeping alone on bigger beds that were meant for two people. It made him feel lonely.
"It's very you."
That was all she said. She reached into her purse and pulled out a tooth brush and marched her way into the tiny hall to find the bathroom door. He could hear her brushing her teeth, and he could of swore she was singing in the process of doing so. Blaine couldn't help but smile and remember why he fell for her.
Because she was stunning. Even when her hair was now down and falling around her head in loose, pretty curls, in a large t-shirt that she had claimed to have found folded on top of the dryer on the way to the bathroom, and as far as he assumed, no pants since he couldn't see them. He started thinking about people chopping off the heads of puppies in order to keep himself under control and he nodded at her, "You're pretty, Rachel."
She blushed. Dead puppies, headless puppies, dead, headless puppies. "You can sleep in my bed, no ifs, ands, or buts. I'll be on the couch if you need me. To close the curtains on the window, you have to tug on the cords with a little bit of effort."
He watched her as she took strides to him, standing on her toes a little, pecking him on the cheek, "Night, Blaine. Thank you, again."
"No problem."
So he just flopped down on his couch that night, unable to sleep. One, because he had a painful erection at the current time, and two, because he should have just swept her into his arms and told her the truth... but he was a puss when it came to things like that. And then the lightening hit and thunder rumbled off in the distance. Blaine could of swore he heard a whimper coming from his bedroom. He tried to keep telling himself to remember she was terrified of storms, but in his mind, the thought kept getting washed out and taken over by an image of Rachel, in his t-shirt, legs spread wide as she pleasured herself with her fingers because of him.
He nearly had a heart attack after being brought out of his dreamlike fantasy when he felt a wet tear hit his face and he nearly bolted up fast enough he almost hit Rachel in the nose with his head, "Rachel, what is wrong?"
"I'm terrified of storms, Blaine," she sniffled and he felt like his heart was being stabbed, he really did hate to see her cry like that, "Will you please sleep with me?"
Would I ever... "Yeah, of course Rachel. I don't want you to cry any more tonight." She smiled weakly and took him by the hand as they crossed into his bedroom which he had only actually been in about three or four times.
He let her pick her place on the bed before he crawled in after her. They both were lying on their backs, barely a centimeter apart before he made a "whew" sound, "It's awful warm in here. You don't mind if I take my shirt off, do you?"
It wasn't hot in here until you came in, she thought to herself, but nodded no, trying hard to keep herself from gluing her eyes to him as he took off his shirt. He turned to his side so that he was facing Rachel and began to study her. A large crack of lightening nearly hitting the window, a loud roar of thunder rumbling by. Rachel nearly jumped into his arms, her face and hands firmly planted against his chest, shuddering heavily.
"Rachel baby doll, it's okay, I'm right here, I'm not going to let anything happen to you."
BUMBUMBUM. Sorry for the cliff-hanger guys but I'm exhausted and I want to go to bed so I am making this a two-shot. It'll get juicy next chapter, promise. :]