Prologue: The Cure For The Pain Is In The Pain
The smell of salt tickles her nose as the setting sun paints the sky vivid colors of oranges and pinks. A small smile touches her lips as she watches the sun slowly falling into the ocean. In a few short minutes, shorter than she likes, the sun would submerge itself completely. Night falling on the eerily peaceful beach.
Yet, here she sits. No towel, no sunscreen, no bikini. Just her and her old blue jeans, her butt planted firmly on the sand.
The beach always seemed to treat her well. When everything around her seemed to be falling apart, this place brought back the lighter side of life. The vast, limitless ocean putting into perspective that the world didn't, in fact, revolve around her. The glittering sunset sky, telling her that there were more important things. The millions and billions of grains of sand, showing her that her problems were usually insignificant.
And that's what she came here for, today. To feel that sensation of icy clarity only the ocean and the sunset could bring her.
She digs her hands into the earth, bringing sand up into a closed fist. She holds it in front of her stark hazel eyes, a small frown forming on her face, as she watches it slip through her fingers. Just like anything worth having, the sand was just an inch out of reach. But still all around her, surrounding her, like an annoying reminder of something she couldn't keep. She opens her hand, palm facing towards the sky, and blows away the remaining grains that had accumulated there.
The breeze separates them, carrying them towards the ocean only to come back to her again.
She pushes her hair behind her ear and exhales slowly, closing her eyes for a moment. The light wind sweeps across her cheek like a kiss from an old friend. She can hear the calm of the waves, taste the salt on her tongue, and feel her tears begin to prick. She didn't know what she could cry over. Sure, life had her down today, but it wasn't enough to cry over. Nothing earth shattering that could break through her iron clad resolve.
Sure, her best friend had left for a summer internship miles and miles away from her. And sure, her boyfriend abandoned her to go to a place far, far away. And yes, a girl she'd grown very close to over the past few months left for another country. Also, the only people she considered family found a new place to live. And her own family didn't bother to ask her to visit. And yeah, high school ended for good last week. And sure, she didn't feel like she had a place to go anymore.
But none of that is enough to make her cry. Because she's used to being alone and that solitude taught her to be strong, but it doesn't do a thing to dull the pain. It doesn't buffer her feelings.
The truth is, I don't really like to think about college, 'cause that means high school's over. After graduation, everyone will probably go play basketball, or sing or start record labels... And I'll have to start all over. Alone. I'm sure I'll be fine. But like I said, I don't like to think about it. Her words from earlier in the year echo through her ears as she muses. She realizes, she never did think about. Not really, anyway. And while she's still sure that she'll be fine, she wishes she would have thought about it.
A shuffle of footsteps and the sound of his timid throat clearing snaps her eyes open. Her first instinct is to adjust her eyes to the dark sky then she whips to face him. His piercing blue gaze meeting hers instantly. "You mind?" He gestures to a spot beside her.
Does she mind? Hell yes, but what does she say? "No, go ahead." She mumbles, they're friends after all. Or so she leads herself to believe.
He wordlessly makes his way down towards her, she faces the ocean once more. He sits next to her, his eyes on her for the moment. "You miss her?" She murmurs out of courtesy more than anything else.
"Sure." He answers and it throws her slightly off kilter. His conviction didn't sound very profound, no poetic words about their Shakespearean romance. Nothing in his voice to distinguish his feelings for the girl he loved and a goldfish he might have been fond of.
But she doesn't pry. Those wounds are still too fresh. "Yeah, me too." She agrees instead, it's safer that way.
He nods, his glance interchanging from her face to the dark blue ocean. He'd look at her when she spoke, then linger for a minute or two longer before watching the water once more. "I knew you'd be here." The ghost of a smirk dances on his lips.
She shrugs a shoulder. "A safe bet." She acknowledges. The most meager of acquaintances could have predicted the same. And once upon a time she used to claim her knew her better than anyone else, what a joke that was.
"Haley, Nathan and Jamie are settled. Nathan likes Charlotte." He changes the subject to a more neutral one, sensing the hostility in her voice.
She pauses, before nodding. "Yeah, Haley told me the same thing." She says quietly. "She feels homesick though." She adds.
He pulls a hand through his sandy blonde hair, it's much too long for her taste. But she doesn't have a say in those kinds of things anymore. She's sure Peyton prefers it this way, or he probably would've cut a long time ago. He'd go to the ends of the earth for that girl, she knew it, he knew it. Maybe it was just Peyton who was stupid enough not to know it.
It's his turn to nod, in this little game they unknowingly stumbled into. "I miss them." He says, his voice holds so much more emotion as he talks about his brother, sister-in-law and nephew.
She looks up at him. "Me too, Lucas." He hears her voice crack, for a split second in the silence. Had they not been alone, accompanied by just the moon and the waves, he wouldn't have heard it at all.
But more than that, he hears her call his name. In that sweet, raspy voice of hers and he feels like it's been ages since he's heard her say it. He knows he's to blame for that, though.
Of course she misses them, they'd become her family. In few weeks they'd been here, she'd been with them every day. Whether it was watching the baby as Haley and Nathan ran errands or helping Haley with the packing. She'd been indispensable for them. "I know, it's hard, isn't it?" He questions, her eyes following a path to the sky.
She doesn't like where this conversation is going. To a place where she'd let herself be vulnerable. But she couldn't let that happen, not in front of him of all people. "Yeah. But, how's your mom?" She asks about that wonderful woman who had taught her so much in so little. Everything her own mother couldn't, she learned from his.
"Good, she seems to like New Zealand." He says, feeling his throat tighten at the mention of his mother. He missed her the most, he was sure of that much. "But it's good for her. Tree Hill never really did treat her right." He thinks out loud.
She can agree with that too. Karen deserved more than this one horse town, they all did. "Mouth says that Philadelphia is infinitely better than Tree Hill." She veers off topic once more.
Lucas smiles at the mention of one of his oldest friends. "I knew he would." He says simply.
A warm shiver trails it's way up her spine, the winds of mid July finally getting to her. "I miss him too." She says, her voice almost inaudible.
"And Rachel?" He wonders.
She doesn't know what to say about her, they hadn't spoken since the party to end all parties. "Good, I'm sure." She says confidently. "Paris, on the other hand, well the city should brace itself." A short laugh escapes her lips as she thinks of the havoc Rachel could cause there. France should feel mighty lucky that she didn't decide to go along. The two of them together was more than trouble, it spelled disaster.
He chuckles at her words. "This year wouldn't have been the same with out her." He says honestly.
She can attest to at least that much. "Sure wouldn't have." She nods.
"And you, Brooke?" He asks, his voice slightly hesitant.
She shakes her head, almost unnoticeably so. "I'm fine." She can feel herself lying through her teeth. There's no way she's fine, this isn't the face of someone who's fine.
He doesn't push her because he's afraid she'll run from him. He knows her nature and he'd rather play it safe. "Any new plans?" He asks lightly.
Now there's a loaded question. New plans, she wasn't even sure of her old one. But now that it didn't work out, the Victoria's Secret offer rescinded, she didn't know where to go. "North Carolina State, I guess." She mutters, at least she'd kept that option opened. She thanked her lucky stars each day that the school had accepted her.
He feels himself frown. "You never did tell me why they took their offer back." He hints.
She runs a hand through her tangled raven locks. Another shiver shifts through her spine. "Another story for another day, Lucas." She answers, pushing off the ground.
He stares at her, off guard and more than surprised. "But Brooke—
"We have an entire summer here, Luke. Just me and you." She wipes her hands against the back of her pants. "I'm sure we'll get to it." She meets his eyes for the briefest of seconds, before shying away.
He opens his mouth to protest, but remembers his earlier promise. Not to push her. "Tomorrow?" He suggests instead.
He sees her head bob up and down. "Sure, Lucas. Tomorrow." She throws a brilliant smile his way before beginning her walk up the beach.
"Wait." He calls behind her, getting to his feet. "It's late Brooke, can I at least walk you to your car?" It's more for his peace of mind than anything else. She's so small, so fragile, so breakable. He didn't like thinking about what could happen if she was left alone in the blanket of night in a deserted parking lot.
Her initial response it to refuse, but as she turn to face him, she sees the determined look in his eyes. The one that told her that he wouldn't take no for an answer. "I can get there myself, you know." She says instead, making sure that he knows that she doesn't need his help.
He nods, "I know. But I don't want you to." He jogs a couple of steps, reaching her. "So come on." He bobs his head towards the parking lot.
She rolls her eyes and sighs dramatically. "Fine." She mumbles, a retreating glance backwards before looking forward once more.
And he's right beside her, as usual, giving her more then she deserves and never even realizing it.
-x-
A/N: I guess things are a bit confusing right now but that's because this is just the prologue, so everything will be revealed in due time. Just remember that this is set in the summer between college and the end of senior year. Lucas and Brooke are the only two left in Tree Hill from the old gang and they find companionship with in each other through mutual feelings of loss and loneliness.
Bear with me, I'm sure this isn't like anything you've read.
Note: The chapter title comes from a song called The Cure for the Pain is in the Pain by Mewithoutyou
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