It was the middle of a Saturday afternoon when things in my life officially changed. First let me introduce myself, my name is Amanda and I'm a bred, born and raised Texan. I had developed an online friendship a few months ago with a man in the Houston area. Since then it progressed to texts, and phone calls for probably the past 3 months. There was a problem though. I was in a relationship with the father of my kids for about 5 years at the time. Oh did I mention that I am a mom too? Another thing was that this guy wasn't very forth coming with some pieces of information about himself. But with that said, we had seemingly become best friends.
On this day, my kids were running around my 2 bedroom apartment like crazy. My boyfriend was out running around doing God knows what, with God knows who. Thankfully my babysitter, who had quickly become like a daughter to me was at the house.
I was in the kitchen when we heard a knock on the door. I hollered at Al (babysitter's nickname) to get the door. All I heard was her gasp and say to whoever was on the other side of the door that I would be right there. She comes running into the kitchen with this crazy look on her face. "Who is it?" I asked her. "Uh, Amanda, you are NOT going to believe me if I told you, so go find out for yourself." She spat out. I threw my hands up in submission as I walked to the door.
As I opened the door, I suddenly became very self-conscious. Never in a million years did I expect to find the man who was on the other side of my door. 6'5", 285 pound, blond hair, blue eyed dream, Houston Texans Defensive end JJ Watt! To say that I was shocked is putting it mildly. "Can I help you JJ?" I asked all but stuttering out the words. "I see you know who I am Amanda." He replied with a goofy smile on his face. "My God he is handsome." I thought to myself. "How can I NOT know who you are? I'm a big fan. But the question is, how on earth do you know who I am?" I questioned him utterly dumbfounded by the events playing out. As I questioned him he let out the most adorable laugh I think that I had ever heard.
"I will ask you the same thing that you just asked me. How can I not know who you are? We have been texting and talking on the phone for months now." Holy shit! He was Justin, the man that I had met online and had started whatever type of relationship that we had now. "Justin?!" I damn neared screamed in his face. "Hi babe." He answered "Oh my God! Now I understand why you held so much back and never sent me a photo." I mumbled into his chest as he pulled me in for a huge hug. "Come in come in." I said dragging him by his hand. All he did was laugh in amusement.
"Hey Al!" I hollered at her. She comes walking into the living room with my kids in tow. I thought that my son, who was 4 at the time, was going to have a heart attack. JJ just scooped up JD and let him have his idol moment. "So you know Justin that I have been talking to for a while now?" I asked Al. "Yeah." She said a little confused. "Well, meet Justin." "Seriously?" "Yeah. I am beyond shocked." I told her.
"Amanda, can I talk to you for a minute?" JJ asked coming up behind me, leaning down and whispering in my ear. "Yeah. Al watch the kids for me for a bit. Can you take them outside?" I asked her. After her, JD and Cheyenne were outside JJ and I sat on the couch to talk. "I have something for you. I know how much you hate the phone that you have right now and how many problems you have with it. So I got you a new phone and put it on my contract. This is just for you and I." he told me handing me the box. "Justin, you didn't have to do that for me." "I know. I wanted to though. Plus I got tired of not being able to get ahold of you sometimes because of that damn thing that I know is sitting on your bed charging right now." He explained. "Thank you sweetie." I told him as I gave him a kiss on the cheek. "I also wanted to see if you would like to go out tonight?" he asked me with some trepidation. "Justin, you know that I am with David and have been for years now." I say kind of thrown off. "I know Amanda. We would just go out as friends. Dinner is all that I am asking for." "You also know that I don't have anything decent to wear." I state as I look down at my jeans and t-shirt that are dirty from a day of cleaning house. "Don't worry about that. We can take care of that later." "Let me see if Al will stay with the kids, there is no telling when their dad will be home." I tell him.
That was the night that JJ started spoiling me rotten. We went out to dinner at some place, I can't even pronounce the name of. But before we did that, he bought me something to wear. For every day of the month! I tried to talk him out of it but there is NEVER any talking Justin out of anything. It was also the night that I ended my relationship with David…in my heart. Justin understood that I wanted to set back money to get the kids and me a place, so I had to put up a front like I still loved David.
It had been a few weeks since JJ ad I had been able to see each other and I was not very thrilled about it. Yet again, David was off doing his own thing, but my Aunt took the kids for a few days so I could have some alone time for the first time in years. Sadly, that alone time meant cleaning house. Let me tell you what, that is a never ending battle. One of my most hated chores is doing dishes, by hand, so the reprieve that I got that day was very much appreciated.
I had been standing at the kitchen sink, hands in hot soapy ass water, when JJ snuck in the house and up behind me like some big ass ninja. "You should really wear your hair down more often baby." He purred in my ear as he pulled my hair down then trailed his lips down my neck. I was so happy that he was there that I quickly turned off the water and turned around in his arms to kiss him. "It's creepy quite. Where are JD and Cheyenne?" he asks. "My Aunt Lynn took them for a few days. They just left this morning." "You want to come back to Houston with me tonight?" "What do you think big man? Of course!" I reply. "Awesome. I figured that we could catch a movie, but first we need to go to my house so we can get ready." He says letting me know his plans for the night.
His house is massive, I don't think that I will ever get over that fact. He had to go hop in the shower, I swear that man takes longer than me to get ready. So I was stuck sitting in his room, on his bed, luckily I had my ear buds in listening to the music that I had on my phone. I was unaware of when he got out of the shower. I didn't even feel him climb onto his bed, but I sure did feel when he wrapped those big arms of his around my waist and starts tickling the holy hell out of me while kissing my neck. Jerk. In the whole process of him tickling me, somehow I laid down on one of the pillows and looked up to see him hovering over me, his legs between mine. "You finally have me in your bed, so what are you going to do with me now?" I asked him with a playful smirk on my face. "Make love to you." He says so matter-of-factly, as he leans in for a kiss. Wow I didn't expect to hear that as an answer. "Did I ever tell you that I have never actually made love? It's always been sex or fucking, never making love." "Amanda, you just need a real man in your life." He answers kind of surprised. "I know hon. You also know that I have NEVER gone for guys younger than me." I say as I place a hand on his cheek. "But you know what? I have an amazing man right here." I continue to say and then kiss him.
"I insist baby!" JJ tells me standing outside my apartment complex's office. He had just informed me that he paid my rent up until the end of my lease. He wanted me to save the money that David gave me for rent, and keep it for myself. Also that he had hired a nanny for when my kids and I were at his house. Not just a regular nanny, a live in nanny! Some lady was staying in my man's house. But he showed me a photo of her and her credentials, she was very qualified, and old. Jerk. He was always too damn nice to me.
Again, a few weeks pass before we are able to see him. It's understandable though, football season and all. This trip up to his house, I drove my car. The kids were with their dad so I had to figure out a good excuse to be gone for a while. This time it was only Justin and I. No going out, no dinner, no movie. We decided to Netflix it for the night. We were curled up in his bed, my head on his chest and him playing with my hair. I was curling up into him like I was trying to have his body absorb me or something, we were that close. I was watching him watch the movie, absolutely enchanted by his beautiful eyes. "Justin?" I said trying to get his attention. "Yeah baby?" he asked leaning down and giving me a peaceful kiss. "I love you." I confessed to him. The silence was deafening. "Babe, I adore you, but I'm just not ready for love yet." He confesses after a few moments. "Oh. I…I'll see you later." I said getting out of the bed, kissing his forehead, all while trying not to cry in front of him. I mean come on, would you want to look like a pussy in front of a guy who just shattered your heart as if it were glass?
After I left Houston I was not ready to go home just yet. So I did something I never did. I went to a dance hall. It was at most 15 minutes from my house and I knew walking in there I would risk seeing people that knew David. But I didn't think that I would run into a team mate of JJ's. Connor. Well long story short on Connor, we danced, we made out (omg did we ever) and I almost left with him. ALMOST! I will say that he is an excellent kisser. Holy wow! But I backed out of leaving with Connor. I just couldn't do it. Sure JJ hurt me, but I was still in love with him whether he was with me or not.
JJ had called a lot. But did I answer the phone? Nope. It had been 3 weeks and I was still too hurt to hear his calming voice on the other end of the line. But I finally picked up the phone to call him.
"Just….J..Justin…" I cried into the phone when he answered. "Amanda! What's wrong sweetie?" he asked immediately in panic mode. "I need you. David just raped me." I cried even harder into the phone. "Is he still home?" "No, he went down the road." I tell him. "Pack as much of the kids' and your stuff as you can. You guys are moving in with me! Don't even fight me on this either." He informed me sternly. "I will be there in 30 minutes baby." He continued. "Justin it's an hour drive." "Don't worry hon. I will be ok. See you in a little bit." He says as he hangs up the phone.
In the time that it took for him to get to my apartment, David had come back to the house. When Justin gets to my place he knocks on the door. David hollers at me to get the door because he can't pull himself away from whatever he was watching. I happily oblige. Justin walks into the apartment and I grab him and lay a big kiss on him. He licks my bottom lip begging for entrance, and I happily oblige him as well, moaning into the kiss. Right in front of David. I slowly broke the kiss and went to finish packing, the kids were in JD's room playing. As I was packing in my room I could hear the rumbles of an argument in the living room. All of a sudden I hear Justin tell David that as far as he is concerned my kids are ours, not mine and David's and that we were moving in with him. Then I hear skin connect with skin. JJ had punched David in the jaw and left him laying on the floor as he took my things to his truck.
After we got to his house, the kids set up in their rooms and settled down Justin pulled me to the back patio so we could talk. I curled up next to him on the outside couch. "Baby I'm so sorry that you had to go through that today. I'm sorry that when you told me that you loved me I basically shot you down. I was wrong sweetie. But the time apart gave me time to think. Amanda, I love you very much and nothing is going to change that." He confessed softly. I simply lean over and give him a slow, sweet kiss. "I love you too Justin."
It had been about a month since the kids and I had moved in with JJ. I was in Reliant Stadium with who knows how many Houston Texans fans, JD and Cheyenne were at home with the nanny. They had begged to come with us, but it would have been sensory overload for them. The D line was on field right now, but of course I was only paying attention to Justin. I blinked my eyes and saw him force a turn over, he was so happy that he ran over to where I was seated and proceeded to jump onto the wall and lay a huge kiss on me. IN FRONT OF THE DAMN CAMERAS! Jerk. After he managed to get down from the wall he had one of the security guards bring me down to the sideline. Most of the guys told me that they were sorry to hear about the rape and everything. JJ needs to learn to keep his mouth shut sometimes, I swear. Connor sees me, gives me a weak smile but comes and sits by me. "Hey Amanda. I have a question." "What's up Connor?" "I know that night at the dance hall was weird but you said something to me and I just wanted to make sure that you talk to JJ about it before you guys get any more serious." Connor says as he gives away his real reason for sitting by me. "And what would that be?" I ask him a little confused. "Have you told him that you had your tubes tied when you had your daughter and the only way that you can get pregnant is IVF?" he asks me knowingly. "No, not yet. I know I need to but things have been crazy. I will talk to him tonight."
"Baby, can I talk to you?" I ask him from the sitting area in front of the fire place. "Yeah sure." He says. "What's wrong sweetie?" he asks when he sees the look on my face. "I need to tell you something about me. It's important." I tell him not really knowing how to approach the subject. He sits in front of me, an ottoman in between us. "I know that we have known each other for a while now and been together now for a while too. But there is something that I never told you. Justin, when I had Cheyenne, I had my tubes tied." I said as I held his hands. "Justin, I know that I should have told you sooner than now, but I wanted to tell you before we got any more serious than we are now. But the only way that I can get pregnant now is through IVF. I can't get pregnant from sex anymore. I'm sorry baby." I continue as I feel him pull his hands out of my grasp. I could tell that he needed some time to think about what I had just told him. "I'm going to give you some time to process everything. I'm going to go for a drive. I love you. JD Cheyenne I will be back, I love you!" I holler up the stairs.
I get in my car and took a deep breath. The fact that I knew he needed time to think upset me some. So I needed a drive to chill out some. Driving always calms me down. Apparently I was not the only one who needed to drive that evening. I had pulled through a stop sign, yes I did stop, and got broad sided by another car. It was bad. I woke up in the hospital to JJ holding my hand crying. I tried to talk but quickly understood that there were tubes down my throat, so I just squeezed his had to let him know that I was awake. "Oh angel! I'm so damn happy to see those green eyes of yours, you have no idea." He said softly. I tried to move but groaned the best that I could. "Don't move baby girl. You are hurt pretty bad. You were in a wreck last night. Your left leg is broken, your spleen was lacerated and you had internal bleeding. But the doctors got you fixed up. I am so sorry for making you feel like you were less than you are just because you had your tubes tied. In the future, we can try IVF if you want to, its entirely up to you. I was so scared that I lost you Amanda. I will never pull away from you like that again. Baby, I know this isn't the best time…but will you marry me?" he asked as he sat on the bed with me. All I could do was nod my head and let tears slide down my cheeks. I wanted to pick on him about not having a ring but I couldn't so I just looked at my left hand. He let out a hearty laugh, "I know baby, but we will get you the ring that you deserve when you are better and get out of here."
That felt like a life time ago but it was only 5 years ago. JD is 11 now and Cheyenne is 9. Justin and I did end up getting pregnant 3 years after we got married. It was a painful experience. 3 miscarriages, we never thought it would happen for us. I was so excited about it, but not too happy about the weight gain. I had finally lost weight and was finally "skinny". We were having twins! He didn't want to find out the sex of the babies, so we found out on the operating table when I delivered the babies. First was Abigail (Abbie) Breeze, then James Justin. He wasn't a JR like Justin wanted but that would not have been right since he had adopted JD as his own. The twins are 2 months old now and happy and healthy. Justin and I couldn't be any happier than we are now with our 4 kids.