I watched Return of the King today and absolutely could not help myself. It's practically canon!
Warnings: Nothing graphic or anything. Onesided Frodo/Sam if you squint a bit. I admit, I attempted to steal some of the dialogue from the movie, but I didn't remember all of it exactly, so don't kill me if it's not the same.
Disclaimer: The Lord of the Rings and its characters do not belong to me. I am just a fangirl.
Mistake
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"Come along, Frodo."
No. It had to be a mistake.
They turned to him, confused, the beginnings of worry creeping into their minds the same way they had years ago now. Not the worries of home; of harvest and of health. These were the worries that were much larger than the Shire, much more crucial than their next meal. These were like those worries, the ones that, when they cared to recall, accompanied the most horribly epic time of their lives. These were the worries of being surrounded by death, or worse, of isolation; for as they hated to remember but remembered nonetheless, separation from the people for whom they cared most was the most frightening thing of all. And as they all still dreamt nightmares of crying out to the dark emptiness they felt in their hearts—as they all still remembered, but refused to mention—their journey had been nothing but separation, again, and again, and again and again until naught but fear and loneliness stood beside them.
Now Sam and Merry and Pippin stared at Frodo, at the awkward way in which he averted his eyes, and the world felt cold.
"What – what does he mean? Frodo?"
Sam watched, and Frodo's eyes met his like they had so many times before, and Sam seared the ocean blue into his memory.
"We set out to save the Shire, Sam. And it has been saved." There was a pause, and Sam felt more helpless than he had when those lips had told him to go home. "… But not for me."
Tears filled his eyes as the book which contained the tale of their adventure was handed to him, and he looked over to see that Merry and Pippin were also crying. Frodo moved over to them, hugging them slowly, carefully, holding their shocked and despairing gazes with comfort and kindness.
He turned then to Sam and hesitated only a moment before throwing his arms around Sam's neck, and Sam held him closely, held him and sobbed lightly, not wanting this to be goodbye. But this was goodbye, so he only clung tighter and pressed his face into the crook of Frodo's neck. And they stayed that way, both hoping for this to last an eternity, both afraid to let go.
Soon enough time returned, and Sam felt the warmth of Frodo's body leave him, and Sam was prepared to beg, to do anything, if only Frodo wouldn't leave him. But before he could even look Frodo in the eyes, his friend's hands were on his shoulders, his lips pressing softly against his forehead. This was more than kindness, more than comfort—this was like a dream, like a blessing. It was like any wrong he'd ever done was forgiven, and all the good was glorified, and for a moment he really did feel like Samwise the Brave.
Frodo wouldn't have gotten far without Sam.
Finally Frodo pulled away and gazed into Sam's eyes, and Sam saw in Frodo all the feelings and emotions he would never see again. Appreciation for everything they'd shared. Pain for the hardships, joy for their successes. Longing… Longing for all he'd never know. Love.
Love for…
He turned away and walked to Gandalf, stepped onto the boat and out of their lives. And as Sam watched the boat sail away, watched until it sank beneath the horizon, he thought that perhaps he had made a terrible mistake.
Trouble, oh trouble move from me
I have paid my debt
Now won't you leave me in my misery?
Trouble, Cat Stevens