A/U This series will be a crossover of all the games I have played; this is a humor/general kind of thing (assuming if no one has even taken a look at the description). This will be rated M for a reason. A LOT of freaking humor that isn't for the kids. Viewer discretion is advised.

Remember, I only made this story up, & I never said anything about me owning any of the series in this story. EVER. As a matter of fact, as cool as the series of what I am writing about are, I do not wish to own them. Thank you.

Episode 01: Raiden & Emma

Raiden had just found Emma Emmerich in the locker room (after beating the living CRAP out of Vamp with a combination of the Grenade Launcher & AK-47), pissing herself just like Otacon did when he was found by Gray Fox (or Frank Jaeger if you will).

Raiden: ROFL!

Emma: SHUT THE HELL UP, YOU FRUITY ASS MONKEY!

Raiden: At least I don't piss my pants. ^_^

Emma: -_-+ don't make me make a virus that will mess your vital organs the hell up.

Raiden: You sadistic maniac!

As they argued, the flooding in the locker room got worse; water spilled in from the walls.

Raiden: O_o RUN!

Emma: I am a little afraid of water because I nearly drowned with my father & my brother was in his room looking up perverted comics!

Raiden: "Cricket noise occurs as Raiden stares at Emma" lets just go.

Emma: But...!

Raiden drags her from the room & pushes Emma into the water. Emma got back out & yelled rather loudly at him.

Raiden: Damn it, Do you want me to save you or not?!?

Emma: Keep your hands to yourself!

Raiden: (Oh my Christ... I'm so glad this is only temporary...)

Emma: Just Let me get ready. I want to take my glasses off.

Putting her glasses away, she held onto Raiden's neck.

Raiden: What the...?!? You want to choke me while I'm swimming?!?!? GO TO HELL!

Emma: Shut up, woman!

Raiden: I'm a guy, you retarded ass hat. Jesus H. Christ, even the President HIMSELF mistook me for a girl.

Raiden, with Emma still on his back, swam through the waters, passing the corpse of Peter Stillman. He made it to the other side.

Emma: I WANNA KILL MY BROTHER, & SEE HIM SUFFER!!!! I WANNA SEE HIM BE RAPED LIKE CRAZY!!!

"Cricket noises occur as Raiden stares at diabolical scientist"

Raiden: You're a sadist.

Emma: You don't understand my pain...

Raiden: Oh shut up, you damn emo.

Raiden took Emma by the arm & went to the next area past the strange liquid Vamp talked about "being that if you come down, you don't come back up" bullcrap.

Raiden got a call from the Colonel, & asked for a report of things.

Raiden: I got Emma here.... We've managed to avoid drowning!

Colonel: No s***, Sherlock Holmes.

Raiden: At least I'm not a demented scientist who seems to have a strange fetish for seeing people suffer...

Colonel: Um.... uh, Raiden, my sympathies... 0_0

Episode 02: Star Fox WTF?

Fox: All aircraft report!

Slippy: I'm fine! I'm fine!

Peppy: Everything's A-OK!

Falco: I'm fine. You ok over there, Fox?

Fox: All aircraft break ---

Rob 64: Enemy approaching from the left.

Fox: Huh? F***!

Wolf: Can't let you do that, Star Fox!

Leon: Andross has ordered us to take you down...

Pigma: You can't beat me!

Andrew: I'm not afraid of you!

Falco: F***! Here they come!

Slippy: Ahh! I'm hit!

Peppy: Good!

Pigma: I'll do you fast, Peppy old pal.

"A record skip noise could be heard when Pigma said that"

Wolf: WTF?

Peppy: What's the big idea!?

Leon: Annoying bird! I am the great Leon!

Falco: No!!

Andrew: Give it up! You can't win!

Slippy: Fox!!

Fox: Slippy! Is everything OK?

Slippy: I'm fine! I'm---

Andrew: Stick to the pond, froggy!

Slippy: Aaahhhhh!

Andrew blasts the CRAP out of Slippy's ship, forcing Slippy to retreat.

Pigma: I've got two words for you; lo-ser.

Falco: That's it! Time to show the monkeys who's boss!

Andrew: O_O F***!

Leon: Not yet. The party's just begun!

Episode 03: Humorspace...

Isaac was running around the Ishimura, the ship, trying to stay alive.

Isaac: "Man... this s*** is wack.... I'm getting jumped by Randy, the giant monster that I had to shoot in the back of the legs, & STOMP, mind everyone. Then I gotta deal with baby morphs that shoot s*** at me, then I gotta do stuff for that wack ass captain... man. S*** is not good. Worse, these guys just be mad... them damn necromorphs just be creeping on you, & when they see you, they get all happy, like "WHAT'S GOOD?!?" & then they wanna hug you, & NOT in the good way. Watch. Here comes one now. He just be like "My life has no meaning" & what not."

A Necromorph appears out of nowhere just hunched, then sprints with life after Isaac, & before he could clamp the man with its jagged arms, he cocked the gun & blasted its knee caps.

Isaac: GET SOME!!! You got MOLESTED.

Out of nowhere, a beast that seems to move just by hopping with its arms, showed up, scaring the CRAP out of Isaac.

Isaac: OH MY GOD, IT'S RICK JAMES!!! F***.... Aaahhhhh!!! OH MY GOD... outta bullets... reload.... go....! ah, s***!

Isaac struggles with the flying flesh heap, running from one part of the arena to the next, shooting it like crazy with the Plasma pistol. After several shots to the arm, the monster finally dies.

Isaac: Ahhh yeah, you got owned, B****! Uhhgh. Yeah, who's your daddy? Don't you ever scare me like that again... I know there's more than one... Yodele yee hoo.... Marco? That's right, there better be no Polo....

Isaac travels down the area, finding a necromorph posing as a dead body. Isaac aims his pistol at the monster's arms.

Isaac: TCH! I remember you. Man! Get your sleepin' ass up. Man... you ain't slick.

He, Isaac, starts blasting the limbs of the necromorph away with the plasma pistol. The beast tries to get back up, but dies after Isaac blasts both of its arms off.

Isaac: You deserve no kudos for that, man. You deserve a DICKHEAD award... B****! Give me your crap. That tasty lookin' health pack.

Isaac goes to the place the Mission Objective tracker guides him too. Readying his pistol, he takes a step out...

Isaac: Marco?

Isaac knew he had it right... he spotted another necromorph near the left part of the bridge.

Isaac: Oh S***! Polo, B****! POLO! GET OUTTA HERE! FREAKING DIE!!! Polo, monkey! MOTHA F*****!

Isaac blasted the crap out of the monster's limbs & moved even further to the elevator...

That's that for now. I hope you enjoyed this random segment of mine. Remember, I only made this story up, & I never said anything about me owning any of the series involved in this story. EVER. As a matter of fact, as cool as the series are in this segment, I do not wish to own them. Thank you.

Part 2 will be on its way, very shortly.

The cool dude is out.