"Should we turn some music on or something?" I ask Scott and wiggle closer to him.
"Dude, no. No we should not turn on some music." He huffs.
"Are you sure? Not even like… alt/techno jams or maybe some smooth jazz?" Scott just stares. I purse my lips, "O…kay."
This started a lot better, I swear. It was totally cool, we had a game plan. "How am I gonna know what to do with my nose?" I asked, to which Scott replied, "I don't know either. We could like…practice?" He already looked skeptical.
"I think that would be okay. That's in the Bro Handbook, right? Line 207 Subsection B48: Helpest thou bro not kiss like an imbecile."
"Okay but you brushed your teeth this morning, right?" Scott squints his eyes.
"Yes, you saw me do it."
"I've seen you do a lot of things I'm not sure I can believe." His date with Allison is this weekend, and my date with Lydia is…well…the ten year plan is still active… "Okay, let's just do this."
"Well, where do I put my hands?" I wave them around and eventually rest them on Scott's shoulders.
"You look like you're about to give me a pep talk."
"Maybe I am. Okay Scotty-boy, you got this. You're about to make out with your best friend. And yes, he did brush his teeth this morning, that doesn't mean he didn't drive to Burger King while you were taking a shower and eat two bags of onion rings because he wasn't aware he would be in this situation. And he's probably very sorry." Scott waves me away and winces, observing my onion breath.
"And also, you lied to me. I definitely remember you kissing Becky Filson under the staircase in second grade."
"Scott, Becky Filson had braces that probably contained germs not native to this region and the eighty-two chicken nuggets she had to have eaten every day. I was crying when it happened anyway, it doesn't count." Scott nods and rolls his eyes. He tries to figure out where to put his hands as well when he finally decides on both of my cheeks.
"I'm just gonna bring you closer then…" Scott pulls me in a little more, pushing my cheeks together a little too hard. He kisses my squished together lips and I protest with as much noise as I can make.
"No, you're doing it really not right at all!" I laugh. "Just keep your hands in your lap. Lightly, like this, okay?" I put my hands softly on Scott's jawline. "We both tilt our heads to our left." He follows and I put my nose against his cheek, suddenly scared out of my mind. And someday I have to do this with a girl; someone who is definitely not my best friend, Scott?!
"Are you gonna do it?" He asks, panicked.
"Well, what about the 90/10 rule?" I pull back. "Like in Hitch. Do I get to be the girl and do the 10% or do you?" Scott straightens his back, preparing to lecture me.
"Stiles, in a homosexual relationship, no one is the girl or the boy, they are whoever they choose to be called."
I close my eyes. "Yes, Scott, yes I know. Maybe that would apply if we were in a homosexual relationship."
He puts his hands up to defend himself. "Okay, okay. Just saying."
I sigh and put my hand back on his face, less comfortable now. "Okay, you do the 10% since I'm the only one who's seen Hitch. Wow, Scott, there are a lot of movies you haven't seen. Come to think of it, do you own a DVD player anymore?"
"Stiles! Just do your 90% and get it over with." I lean in again but hesitate when our lips almost touch. I breathe in and push forward. Scott's lips are dry but I assume mine are as well. It's an okay kiss, definitely better than anything Becky Filson had every given me. We stay there for a little too long because my chest hurts from holding my breath. "I think we are supposed to breathe out of our noses," Scott says as we both pull away, gasping for air.
"Agreed. And maybe move our lips a little? That was stiff as could be." We try again, this time making it a series of small kisses, breathing included. "That was better," I say.
Scott nods, wiping his mouth. "A little spit-y, but better."
"You were right. Smooth Jazz would not have been a good choice."